Chapter 1 - Lila

Propping the basket on my hip, I take a moment to soak in the sweet, soft rays of the sun as I allow my eyelids to drift closed. My lips are naturally curving into a smile of appreciation when the warmth kissing my cheeks is suddenly gone.

My brows furrow as I’m forced to open my eyes abruptly. The peaceful moment is lost when I find myself faced by Cynthia and her friend, Gloria.

“I love what you did with your hair,” Cynthia praises with a smile as she reaches out and strokes the back of her hand along the shorter locks of my blonde hair.

A shiver courses down my spine then, only because I’d forgotten that Cynthia could be nice when she wanted to. Even though I haven’t been able to experience her kindness in almost ten years, I can’t help but hang on to the belief that change is possible.

“Th-thanks,” I murmur under my breath, still slightly wary of her as she retracts her hand.

“Pleasure,” she smiles, exchanging a glance with Gloria before turning back to me. “Are you on kitchen duty today?”

I hesitate to reply, only because I’m unable to sniff out her motives behind that question. Since when does Cynthia care about my schedule?

“Um…yeah,” I offer with a shrug, lifting the basket a little higher in a gesture toward it. “I was just about to hang the towels before heading to the kitchen.”

“Oh, goodie!” Cynthia claps her hands together, startling me with how excited she’s suddenly become, her eyes lit up with anticipation. “I was hoping you’d help me with tonight’s soup. You know…like old times.”

Another moment of hesitation passes as I gauge her face, my eyes flitting to her hands and finding them empty. There’s nothing she can use as a weapon against me, and even the brutality of her usually venomous tongue isn’t being wielded right now.

What’s going on?

“Sure,” I offer with a shrug.

“See you then, Lila,” she purrs, waving her dainty fingers through the air as she takes the steps leading to the back entrance of the pack center with Gloria following close behind.

I gaze out at the yard behind the center, frowning to myself as I strain my ears toward the sound of the two she-wolves entering the building. Despite my suspicions, I don’t hear a single giggle or voiced jab.

I allow another shiver to run down my spine before descending the rest of the wooden stairs and making my way down the stone path toward the rails. I set the basket down before picking up a damp towel that’s fresh out of the washing machine, then flap it through the air to straighten it out.

“Lila!” Valerie calls out from ahead. I giggle as I pull the hanging towel back to reveal her beaming smile as she skips toward me. She immediately wraps me into a hug as I swiftly pull her behind the curtain of the towel.

“Don’t let Dorothy see you out here,” I warn with a giggle as I pick up another towel from the basket. “She’ll just chase you away, and I need to speak to you.”

“That old hag can stop fussing,” Valerie chides as she rolls her eyes. “We’re not kids anymore.”

“Yeah, but I’ve been doing my best to stay out of trouble, and it’s working. Cynthia’s actually being nice to me.”

Valerie spins me to face her with a hand on my shoulder. “What?!” she exclaims, the color from her face visibly seeping away. “Is that what you wanted to talk about? That Cynthia is… nice?”

“Don’t be so shocked, Val,” I dismiss with a shrug. “I passed her just now, and she complimented my hair.”

Valerie huffs, crossing her arms over her chest and turning narrowed eyes on the building ahead as if she can see right through the bricks. “She noticed your haircut?”

“Uh-huh.”

“And she didn’t make a dig at you?”

“Nuh-uh.”

Valerie unfolds her arms and turns to me, worry knotting her brows. “She’s up to something, Lila.”

“What if she’s not?” I offer, taking out the last towel and hanging it on the line.

“You see, that’s where you’re wrong. People like Cynthia Warren don’t change,” Valerie grumbles.

I sigh as I lift the empty basket from the ground as it signals the end of my short rendezvous with my best friend. It’s only because Dorothy, the she-wolf in charge of the pack’s duty center, won’t allow Valerie and me to have the same schedules. We both know that it’s because Cynthia and her crew probably interfered—they needed me to be all alone, vulnerable, and weak against their attacks.

Except, I’m not weak anymore. I’ve learned to take their gruesome words in one ear and let them wander off through the other without allowing it to affect me.

The hard armor I wear now is all thanks to Flynn, how he’d humiliated me in front of those she-wolves with his rejection made me realize that I was on my own. Left to face the residual torment of his brutal rejection, I became numb to the rest.

Maybe that’s why they’re being nice to me. They know that what they say doesn’t bother me anymore.

I place a reassuring hand on Valerie’s shoulder and smile. “‘I'd like to believe that change is possible for everyone.”

She doesn’t seem convinced, shaking her head reproachfully. “ You have changed, Lila. That doesn’t mean it’s possible for everyone.”

“Why not?” I frown.

“Because…” she sighs. “You’re different.”

I pause to regard the conviction in Valerie’s eyes, but it doesn’t have the effect I thought it would. Instead, I’m left feeling disheartened as I watch her leave the training center’s backyard.

I know I’m different…I’ve been different all my life. From the way I feel emotions so intensely, to the fact that I am a wolf-less Omega without a working metabolism, I’ve never fit in.

Still, hearing it from my best friend cuts through me like a sharp, serrated knife, spurring every determined step toward the building in pursuit of feeling better about myself.

If change is possible, then perhaps Valerie has changed, too.

Huffing my irritation, I head to the kitchen after leaving the basket in the washroom. Cynthia stands by the pot of simmering vegetables, stirring a spoon in large circles.

“Oh, Lila!” she cheers with a pleasant smile when she notices my arrival. “I’m glad you came.”

“Uh…me too.” I hesitate as I grab an apron from the hanger and proceed to put it on. My decision to give Cynthia’s strange turn of character a chance is mostly because my best friend just reminded me of something I would have liked to forget. Every day, at every turn, I’ve only ever been reminded of how different I am. Cynthia has always been my greatest adversary, and I’ve suffered enough torment at her hands to be suspicious of what’s going on as she lifts a spoonful of soup in my face.

“Taste it,” she encourages sweetly. “I need to know if it needs more salt.”

I nod tentatively before leaning in and puckering my lips enough to slurp a sip of the hot soup.

“More salt,” I confirm. “Here, I’ll do it.”

Cynthia steps aside to allow me to shake more salt into the pot.

“I didn’t think I’d ever see you in the kitchen,” I comment as I begin to stir.

“Well, I figured I should do more for the pack,” she chuckles. “Especially now that the Blood Moon soldiers are returning.”

Instinctively, I stop stirring the pot. “They’re coming back?” I perk up.

Cynthia nods, offering her hand to take over stirring. “Didn’t you hear? They’re set to return in two days.”

I blink fervently, mentally processing this information as I feel excitement brewing in my chest.

The Blood Moon special ops soldiers will be back soon. That means I’ll get to see my brother, Miles, in two days.

I need to prepare for his return.

Ever since the Blood Moon soldiers left for special ops training in the Ouachita Mountains two years ago, I was left to fend for myself. I found myself filling up my time with every available task in the pack center, from washing to gardening and everything in between. It kept me busy while my brother was away.

While Flynn Lycoan was away, too…

The thought creeps into my mind without being welcomed. I’ve worked hard to become numb to the raging emotions that had me foolishly proclaiming my love for Flynn that day in the woods. A malevolent force of recklessness overcame me in that moment and spurred me on to make the biggest mistake of my life.

Every challenge I’ve faced in my life was brought on by fate. I lost my parents, and then I wasn’t compensated for that loss when the Moon Goddess decided that I wasn’t good enough to receive my wolf. Left desolate as the Blood Moon’s Omega, I’d only made my situation worse when I told Flynn Lycoan that I was in love with him.

It’s not as if I could control the words I spewed that day. In hindsight, I never knew a thing about romantic love. It was a silly crush, developed at the ripe age of twelve when I first visited the Lycoan house with my brother Miles. It shouldn’t have been mistaken for anything more than that.

Didn’t Flynn prove that he wanted nothing to do with me whenever he mocked me and bullied me along with the others?

Even now, the thought of his harsh words leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

“Lila!” Cynthia calls, snapping two fingers in front of my face to jolt me from my daze.

“Y-yeah?”

“You were very far away,” she chuckles, going back to stirring the pot. “What were you doing, huh? Thinking about Flynn?”

My jaw drops and my eyes grow wide. “F-Flynn?” His name rolling off my tongue leaves my throat dry as I gulp. “N-no. I wasn’t,” I quickly defend.

“Good,” she sneers as she drops the spoon on the counter before grabbing the pot’s handles. “I hope not.”

Before I can say anything to further my defense, Cynthia lifts the pot off the stove and turns to me. With a familiar malicious smirk on her face, she tips the pot over and flicks it toward me, sending hot soup flying through the air until it spills all over the front of my apron.

“Ow!” I yelp, hopping back and grabbing the apron just as the hot liquid seeps through the layers of clothing and scorches the flesh of my chest. Horrified, I turn my widened eyes on Cynthia as I feel the burn pierce my skin.

“Oops!” she shrugs nonchalantly, replacing the pot on the stove with a calmness that betrays any hope of her changing. She turns to me with a glare, lifting a pointed finger at my face. “That’s what you get for even daring to think about him.”

“I wasn’t thinking about him, Cynthia!” I glance down at the mess on my chest just as other Blood Moon volunteers appear at every corner. My cry of terror had drawn their attention, and now we’ve gathered an audience.

Again.

Cynthia sneers, her eyes burning with hatred as she glares at me. “I know exactly what you’re thinking, Omega!” she roars, stabbing her finger into my shoulder. “You think that with your fancy new haircut, you can hide the fact that you’re still a useless, fat piece of shit!”

“Cynthia—” I begin in a warning tone, but the redhead doesn’t back down. Instead, she takes a menacing step forward, towering over me and throwing daggers at me with her glazed eyes.

“Listen to me very clearly, Omega,” she threatens. “Flynn’s coming back, and you’re gonna stay away from him. He already rejected you once. We don’t want him to throw you out of the pack, now, do we?”

I gather every ounce of courage I can find, every strand I’d woven for myself over the past two years, by becoming numb to the feelings I’d felt so intensely before. Her words mean nothing to me—I made sure of that when I built the fortress of brick walls to protect myself from their cruel words. Nothing can break me any longer, and I lift my head defiantly, squaring my shoulders as I glare equally as fiercely into her eyes.

“You listen to me clearly, Cynthia,” I bite back coarsely. “I don’t give a rat’s ass about Flynn.” I take a step forward, pointing a finger in her face even though I have to look up at her. “Actually, I don’t give a rat’s ass about any of you. I might be the Omega, but I am sick and tired of you treating me like shit. I am as much a part of this pack as anyone else. That’s why I’m still here.”

It feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, a refreshing satisfaction washing over me as I see the shock on Cynthia’s face.

Around us, our audience gasps while I hastily remove the ruined apron and fling it at Cynthia’s feet. Ignoring the sound of Dorothy’s yelling from her office, I spin on my heel and storm out of the center without giving the pack members the satisfaction of witnessing tears fall from my eyes.

Valerie was right—Cynthia didn’t change.

But I did. I became mentally strong enough to stand up to her and finally give her a piece of my mind. It’s been two years in the making, and I finally did what I never thought was possible.

It’s what gives me hope as I march to my secluded cabin on the outskirts of the forest. My heart races to the beat of every step until I’m in the sanctity of the wooden walls of the cabin, where I lock the door and exhale as if I’d been holding my breath.

That’s when the adrenaline subsides, leaving me to face the burning sensation on my chest.

Heaving in deep breaths, I rip my shirt off to unveil the damage of the hot soup on my chest. The mounds of my breasts are a deep red shade, and my breathing stutters as I move a trembling finger to touch the scorched skin.

“Ah!” I suck a breath through my teeth, my vision clouding with the tears I refused to shed in front of the Blood Moon members. Now, in the safe confines of the cabin, I allow the tears to fall as I rush to the mirror in my bedroom to inspect the injury.

No matter how hard I glare at my reflection, the burns on my chest remain. Instead of fading within seconds, I’m staring at second-degree burns that blister and swell right before my eyes.

My tears fall uncontrollably as I sink to the rug in front of the mirror, dropping my face in my hands and sobbing over the cruelest fate bestowed upon me by the Moon Goddess. If I had received my wolf on my eighteenth birthday, my body would have healed itself on my command. Because I’m wolf-less, just an Omega in the Blood Moon Pack, I have to suffer the consequences of Cynthia’s attack.

“This won’t do…” I say to myself, shaking my head as I lift my face out of my hands and meet the blue depths of my own determination in the mirror. “I’m not weak…I’m not powerless…I’m not weak…I’m not powerless…” I chant the affirmations that my best friend drilled into my head when I decided I was done with being the pack’s punching bag.

Whatever happened today isn’t enough to dampen my spirit. Not when I fought so hard over these past two years to keep my head above water in Zafra.

I’d been on the precipice of eternal doom until I decided to pick myself up and face the horrors like a gallant soldier of my own making, without an inner wolf or another blood sacrifice to the Moon Goddess.

I wipe the tears from my eyes and pick myself up to my feet, rising like a phoenix from the ashes of a dysfunctional life. If Cynthia Warren thinks that she can make my life a bigger misery now that Fynn is returning, she has another think coming.

If I could stand up to her, I sure as hell won’t be fazed by him. These brick walls still stand strong, and nothing will ever bring them down.

Not the Delta's daughter, or the Alpha’s son.