Chapter 15

I tap the buttons on the dashboard inside my office. I can't even count how many times I've tried this. Nothing matters.

The green light for the network is up, but...

I wait a few seconds, but nothing shows up on the screen. The communication device beeps and the call ends on its own.

No one picks up the call, yet again.

The audio recording instructs me to leave a voice message or tap to leave a video message. I tap to end the call instead.

There's no point in it.

I'm just doing it for the sake of it and... to pretend I've tried.

I sit back and stare at the mildly bright screen. No one's on the other end. Because we're meant to be a temporary settlement until the main team gets here, the network isn't completed. I can't reach anyone else other than the home company.

So...

I rub my eyes and chug down the glass of water to my side. Is it too early to be drinking?

It probably is. It probably is also the reason I'm always sober. I want to forget that the world exists from time to time, but it's either too early to be drunk, or everyone else is around, so I can't be drunk.

I just want to make sure everything's fine, but...

The office room is cold even when I have my jacket on. It is dark here when I don't want to turn on the lights. There's nothing to do here when I can't get in touch with anyone.

Are we left here to die off on our own?

Why?

I've done nothing wrong to deserve this. None of the beings here has done a thing to warrant this either.

I gasp as tears surge in me yet again. Why?

How bad will it be when the others eventually find out about it? They are going to be mad at me.

Technically, it's not my fault that I can't contact them anymore. I've done everything I could, and the network has been working, it's just...

What happened back home?

I rub my temple. It is about time to forget about that. I've been thinking about the same thing since I lost contact with them. Nothing has ever changed since that happened. We managed to stay alive till now and have a nice projection to keep doing fine. But doing fine isn't what's promised to everyone when we arrived.

I... I would never have the money to pay everyone. And... On a distant planet like this one that's remote from established trading routes, there's no need for money. What are we going to do with that? To toss the coins at the beasts in the forest?

It's not going to work and eventually...

Fuck...

I get up from the chair and pace in the office room. I can't leave the planet even if I can make myself leave everyone behind.

If I can go back there, or reach a planet with the technology needed to contact others, it'd be great. But... I doubt we have enough fuel to get the mastership going. There's a second set of communication devices there, but that isn't working either.

What can I do to make things easier?

Maybe... Maybe it is already too late. If I told everyone when that happened the first time, would it be better?

I've been fighting to stay hopeful, maybe that's the wrong decision that I can't un-make.

I head back to the dashboard and finish the rest of my water when my watch beeps. It is almost time to start preparing food for dinner with the rest of the team in the kitchen.

There's no holiday or break on this planet. We pretty much need everyone to keep everything running. Other than getting sick, every day is a work day.

I'm already having it easy when I can sneak away to be here when the others have no excuses but to work their shifts.

Yet...

I just want to cry and do nothing. It has always been like that on this day of the week. But...

I guess I'm still showing up for my shift, just like how it has been every week.

I head to the door and open it.

"Whoa!" Someone is outside. I take a step back before I bump into them.

It is Acea, which I guess is better than the gray ass. I wonder whether he is staying with the farming group and being a good worker.

I nod. "Are you looking for me?"

"Yes, boss." He peeks into the office. I've already turned off the screen, so there's nothing for him to stare at. "Is everything fine?"

"Yeah..." I try my best to look certain about my words, even though I can't even convince myself that things are fine.

He frowns. "Are you sure about it?"

"Yes. What's the problem?"

"It has been a while since they came. So... I wonder... I want beer."

"There's a delay and they are trying to solve the issue."

"What issue is that?"

"They aren't specific about that."

"But..."

I head down the corridor, ignoring his question. I don't want to make things up and have to remember what I made up.

He follows. "Boss, they can't keep doing that to us. We deserve an answer."

"Complain to them then."

"You are the one who's been talking to them."

I turn around and hiss at him. "Then what do you want?"

"If you can't tell them, I'll tell them. Let me connect—"

I rush to block him away from the door. "No, get to the kitchen and get working. We have dinner to serve."

"No." He pushes me to the side with one arm and pushes the button with the other. Then, with his extra arm, he pats my shoulder. "Don't worry, I'll be polite."

"It's not about that!" I kick him, but he annoyingly has a fourth arm. He blocks me off and makes his way into the office room.

He watches the dashboard and will be pressing the buttons soon enough and he is going to find out...

"No, Acea. Stop arguing with me. Let's get going."

"But—"

Someone comes in and hisses. "When she tells you to leave, just do as you're told."

"Hey!" Acea sneers when whoever that is drags him back.

Somehow, Melzul is here... Why is he even here?

Acea rolls his eyes. "What do you have to do with this? I— Hey!"

Melzul grabs one of the arms and pulls Acea out of the office. Maybe four arms are useful at times, but it gives more arms to be pulled, so...

Acea stands his ground, but Melzul is seemingly stronger. Acea hisses. "Why don't you let me contact the home company?"

I... Because... Because there may not be a home company to contact?

I'm going to say something when Melzul cuts in. "That's above your pay grade. Having four arms doesn't mean you're special."

"Hey! That's not what I mean. And we know having four arms is pretty cool." Acea yanks his arm back, but Melzul rams at his waist and gets him out of the office.

I hurry out of the office too. The door closes behind me. Melzul folds his arms and sneers at Acea. "Maybe you should be gone and stop annoying her."

Acea also folds his arms. "Why can't I talk to the home company, though? It's taking too long for them to give us an answer. We also aren't paid for longer than it is making sense. And you, the gray thing, have nothing to do with this whole situation. Once, I thought you were from home, but you are just a random guy who fell from the sky."

Melzul hisses. "What do you mean by that? I don't care. You do as you're told, dumbass."

"Whoa! What did you just say?"

I stand between them. "Stop it. No fighting and no arguing here. I wish I had a better answer for you, Acea. But I don't, not right now."

My heart races when Acea glares at me. I thought he was one of the patient ones. But... I guess I can't blame him or anyone who asks. They have been asking and I've been pushing back on when I'll have an answer for them, so... Patience is running thin.

I remain eye contact with him. "Look, I'm in the same boat as everyone. I want my money too."

Acea sighs. "I think so. I guess I'm just missing home. Sorry. I'm heading to the kitchen now."

It pains me to watch him make his way to the lift with a hunched back and tired arms.

I lean on the wall, letting out a breath.

Melzul frowns as he watches me. I suppose he is concerned.

I lift my hand. "Don't talk to me."

"Hey, I'm not planning to talk. I... Well, fine..."

I remain in the corridor, waiting for Acea to be gone even further away. Melzul shouldn't be here this time of the day, so...

But I don't want to talk to him. I suppose I should thank him for helping, but I'll have to tell him what happened. When we were on the spaceship, I was planning to tell him. He is the only one who knows nothing about where we come from and how things turn into chaos. Maybe he can give me some ideas.

Yet...

"Irene, I... Fine... I said I'm not talking." He huffs and looks away, still seeming to care about me a bit too much.

I ask, "Why are you here? You should be with the farming team."

"I was. We finished everything early, so the leader decided that we'll be back early."

Fine, that's not beyond reasonable. "Then, why are you at my door?"

"Um... Because I'm not that good at being patient after all."

I hold back a laugh. At least he is honest. I stare at him. He is taller than me and I have to lift my face to look him in the eyes. Despite how stupid it sounds, there's an urge in me to hug him. Or say, I want him to hold me before I'll crumble into pieces.

Everything's too much for me to handle. Sometimes, it feels like I'm the only one fighting things I can't even see or touch.

He sighs. "Do you need help? Or do you need me gone?"

"I... I think I need you to hold me."

"Oh... Are you injured?"

I shake my head. "Shut up and hold me."

"Okay... Do we do it here? Or inside the office?"

I flinch at the mention of the office, I don't want to be in that place any longer than I need to. "Maybe here."

"I thought you didn't want—"

"I said, shut up and hold me."

"Okay." He wraps his arms around me, and his warmth holds me up.

It's not that bad when he knows when to stop talking. I let out a breath. I'm not expecting or even imagining that he will be the one comforting me. But he can't shut up for long... And he still annoys me.

He pats my back. "Something's wrong with the company? Like... something isn't going as planned?"

"It'd take a blind one to not see that."

"Then I'm glad I'm not blind. Didn't figure you do sight tests here."

"Are you messing with me?"

"I'm serious about trying to help you. But you're the one messing with me first."

I suck in a breath, taking in his scent. I don't even know why I want him to hold me. There are a lot of fine males here, but somehow, I don't feel like letting any of them hold me.

This gray thing has been annoying me since he arrived, but somehow...

What's in his head? Is he thinking about the same thing?

I clear my throat. "So, I didn't ask whether you want to hold me. I mean, if you don't want to..."

"I want to. I'll hold you for however long until you feel better."

"Being nice, huh?"

He winks. "Trying to do that in a non-creepy way."

"Are you creepy?"

"I'm not. But it's about how you feel."

I close my eyes. "Look, everything's a mess."

He remains quiet, probably eagerly waiting for the answer he has always wanted. At least the answer he wants comes easier than the answer for the rest of the village. I let out a sigh when there are footsteps from the corridor, coming to us.

He lets go of me at once and leans onto the wall by my side, pretending as if nothing happened. At this point in time, I don't care about who sees us together anymore. But... Maybe he doesn't want others to see us together.

It is one from the kitchen team. "Hey, boss. Thought you needed help, we were looking for you."

I guess I should show up there. That's on the schedule and I'd hate to make others do my part of the job. "Everything's fine. I'm heading down already."

"Good."

I go with him. Melzul frowns and sneers at the kitchen crew. I give him a wry smile. Guess he has to wait a bit longer now.

I glance at Melzul, expecting his pissed face. Instead, he smirks as he watches me, seemingly coming up with weird ideas...