11. Hazel

11

Hazel

I paced up and down my prison, struggling to form a plan to keep myself alive. Valmore didn't come back from the bridge. Was he dead? Had he… turned against me?

No. He'd die for me. He had proven that much. But then that left the other option, which was worse.

If Valmore didn't come back, Jesse would. Then the entire crew would be able to do what they wanted with me. I would never be able to fight them off.

Maybe I would be better off if I tried to fight and escape. If I didn't succeed, they would shoot me, and at least I wouldn't have to suffer from an even worse fate. I plotted how I would do it, but in every scenario, I would only make it halfway down the hall before the guards opened fire.

Death was better than being somebody's plaything, though.

Every time I turned toward the porthole, I indulged in a single brief peek outside. I dreaded the moment someone opened that door. Who would it be—Valmore… Jesse… or someone else?

I headed back to the end of the cell when something thumped outside the wall. I whipped around fast and tensed up, ready to make a break for it. Was this the last moment of my life?

The door creaked open. Male voices chattered out in the hall. Was that…? All at once, a dark figure entered the room. For a moment, my mind shut down. I couldn't decide who it was.

Then I recognized Valmore's horns. His hair and body became clear in the dim light. "Valmore!" I lunged for him. I would have thrown my arms around him, but something held me back. "What happened? You're bleeding! Are you all right?"

He glanced down at his arms. Blood drenched his hands and wrists halfway to the elbow. Gore and specks of something sticky dripped from his hair and saturated his clothes. "It isn't mine. I'm fine."

I opened my mouth and shut it again. I gulped. Something in his eyes made me tremble. Something was wrong—desperately wrong. "What's going on? What happened to you?"

He turned away. "I've taken control of the ship. It's mine now. You can leave here. You aren't a prisoner anymore."

My mind reeled. "You… what?"

"I killed Zol… and Jesse… and two others. The crew and the ship are under my control. Come on. I'm taking you to the mess hall. You can get something to eat, then you can go back to your quarters. We still have at least four days' travel before we reach the Trozolla system."

"Trozolla!" I shrieked. "We can't! We have to contact the IPA. We have to tell them that the crew took us captive. We have to abort."

He shook his head, and his features hardened into something even more frightening. I barely recognized him. "My people are on that planet—the planet that the IPA sent you to investigate. The unrest is about some other species attacking a colony of Kavians. Did you know that?"

I jolted at the sudden accusation in his tone. He locked his eyes on me, demanding an answer. He didn't look away. "No, I… I didn't know. I didn't know anything about the planet. It's uncharted… At least, I thought it was." I wondered now if that was why the IPA had assigned him to this mission.

"It isn't uncharted anymore." He relaxed, but he didn't look at me again. "A file of long-range scans came through while I was on the bridge. There's a colony of refugee Kavians on the planet, and some unknown assailant is attacking them. We're going to investigate. We won't go back to Elysium if there's any chance we can help them."

He stalked out of the compartment. He stood in the corridor, waiting for me to follow him. He said I wasn't a prisoner anymore. He said I was free now, but my brain didn't want to accept that. I kept expecting something else to blindside me out of nowhere.

The door stood open. Valmore waited in the corridor. I crept nearer to the threshold and peered around the door frame. The corridor was empty except for me and Valmore.

He swiveled into position at my side and we set off down the corridor. I knew the way to the mess hall by now, and I wasn't sure I wanted to go back there.

Jesse was dead. Valmore was in charge of this ship now. No one would mess with me, but somehow, that thought didn't put my mind at ease.

"What did Jesse mean earlier? He said you knew why he wanted you to go to the bridge. What did he mean?"

"It's not important now. I'll tell you later. Come on. Get something to eat, then get some sleep. I know you're tired, and I need you sharp when we get to Trozolla."

He turned into the mess hall. The place stank of bad memories… and good ones. Right over there, on that table, Valmore and I…

Valmore nudged me and distracted me from those overpowering images flooding my mind. Would I ever be able to eat in the mess hall without seeing and feeling and experiencing the whole thing all over again?

He steered me toward the service counter and served me some kind of stew. Valmore got his slab of meat and we both sat down at the same table. This time, I got to the table first, so I ended up sitting with my back to that table. I could concentrate on eating without seeing Valmore standing over me…

He sat down across from me and started sawing up his meal. He took the first bite and studied me while he chewed. I studied him while I chewed. Why did getting free from the kidnappers throw this wall between us? Why did I suddenly stop trusting him just when he finally saved me from a fate worse than death?

It was odd that he didn't want to report to the IPA what happened. Sure, the IPA would immediately cancel our mission and leave his people high and dry, but shouldn't they know?

I ate faster than I should have. I didn't realize I was as hungry as this. I started on a pitcher of water when he put down his blade. He didn't pick it up. "I have to tell you something, Hazel."

I choked on my mouthful, having not expected him to speak. "What is it?"

"I've been walking a tightrope because I was afraid you would find out. I can't keep it a secret from you anymore. You deserve to know the truth."

I gulped down the rest of the food in my mouth and braced myself for the worst. "Okay. I'm listening."

He took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. "I'm not a bodyguard. I don't have any clearance to work for the IPA. We hacked the personnel database and inserted a doctored file with a fake service record. In fact, we inserted a doctored file for the entire ship and crew so we could get onto the Elysium Space Station and take this job. None of it was legit."

I blinked once. "You mean that you're…"

"Pirates. Mercenaries. Call us anything you want. Call me anything you want. I doubt you can come up with a name dirty enough for what we are—for what I am. We planned to kidnap an IPA officer and extort the organization for a hefty ransom. I was going to pose as the officer's bodyguard so that I could make sure the officer was returned without incident. As much as we wanted the money, the last thing we wanted was the IPA's heat."

"You… You lied to me!"

His eyes drifted down to the hunk of meat on his tray. "Yes. I did."

"You…" I glanced toward the table— that table. "You did all that… on false pretenses! You screwed me over so you could… So you could rob the IPA!"

"No!" He sprang forward in his seat. "Never that! I made the captain swear no one would get hurt. Messing with you was never part of the bargain. I…"

"How dare you even pretend to give a shit about me when you… did that ?"

"Listen, Hazel. It wasn't like that. When the guys started to mess with you, I went crazy. I couldn't stand watching them assault you like that. I claimed you were my mate to protect you. I didn't expect them to make me prove it."

I bolted to my feet so fast I knocked over the bench, then I whirled away. This couldn't be happening. I couldn't have been fooled this terribly.

I stormed halfway down the corridor, but where could I go? I was trapped in this floating nightmare until Valmore let me off. He might decide to keep me on board forever. He was a pirate. Even he said so. He had no reason to take me back to Elysium—or anywhere else, for that matter.

"Hazel, wait!"

"Leave me alone!"

"Just wait." He dodged in front of me and blocked my path. "Just hear me out."

I glared at him through squinted eyes. "I told you," he panted. "I never wanted you to get hurt. The captain gave his word no one would harm you, and he violated that word when he turned you over to the crew. That's why I killed him. I took over the ship to free you."

I shook my head in disbelief. "I knew something was wrong when you didn't even try to stop the crew from capturing us. You just stood there like a lump."

"That was the plan," he pressed. "Then we were supposed to be imprisoned until the IPA sent the ransom. Everything else—I never agreed to that."

I pressed my lips. "I'd like to go back to my quarters. You don't mind, do you? You're not going to stop me, are you?"

"You're free. You won't be harmed any further. I'm sorry… for everything. "

I pivoted around him and set off down the corridor at a fast clip. "Tell me when we get back to Elysium. Don't bother me until then."

I tried my best to ignore the fact that he accompanied me all the way back to my quarters. He didn't say anything, and it was a good thing too. I would have heaped insults on him for his trouble.

I yanked open the door and reentered my quarters. It seemed like years since I left it, even though it couldn't have been more than a couple of days.

I stalked inside and almost slammed the door in his face, but at the last minute, I caught a glimpse of his eyes. He said nothing. He didn't try to defend himself further. He said his piece and so did I. Now we had to live with the consequences.

Something in his expression wouldn't let me slam the door in his face. A black scowl twisted his features, but something worse than agony festered underneath the surface. If I didn't know better, I would say telling the truth hurt him worse than it hurt me.

His eyes darted sideways, then he pulled them back to my face with difficulty. "Would you like me to arrange for your meals to be brought to you here? You don't have to go to the mess hall if you don't want to. I understand why you wouldn't want to."

A lump swelled in my throat. "Forget that. Just tell me why you went along with the original plan? What did the IPA ever do to you?"

"It's more what the IPA didn't do. They claim to care about downtrodden races all over the galaxy, but they pick and choose which ones they help. I'm sure you've been to their fancy galas and luxurious member suites. I could make better use of that money, helping my own people directly. That's what I thought, anyway, before things got messy."

"You're talking about the Kavians. Don't you realize the IPA sent me to help the Kavians on this mission? How do you justify that?"

He shrugged. "I didn't know at the time they were going to help the Kavians, and from what you say, you didn't know it either. No one did and your original mission didn't necessarily call for helping the Kavians, just observing."

"The IPA has to follow intergalactic law. We can't just go around intervening in every squabble between species."

"We'll see. We'll see what the IPA does when we get to the planet. We'll see if they do something useful for once, or if they leave the Kavians to rot exactly the way they've done a hundred times before."

He started to turn away. For some reason, I stopped him. "Once the IPA finds out what happened on this ship, you'll be banned from the organization. You'll be hunted out of IPA space."

"They won't find out unless you tell them. Once we reach VXC3, if we find out there really are Kavians there, I'll join them. You can take the Methuselah and return to Elysium if you want."

"Why does what I want matter all of a sudden?"

Valmore looked away and shook his head. "It matters."

He didn't leave, though. He stood before me like a convict on the block. He kept pressing his lips together as though he was holding something back. What could that be? What could he possibly say to change my mind?

Part of me wanted to apologize for the things I just said about him. Now that my anger cooled some, I realized I didn't mean half of it. He did save me from getting used by the entire crew, and I fully believed he didn't mean for things to turn the way they did.

And either way, I told him then that I wanted to do what we did. I wasn't lying about that. I had meant it.

The sequence of events crystallized with the new information that he'd been in on the plot from the beginning. He wanted to protect me when the crew attacked. I saw him swivel in front of me. No one could fake those instinctive movements. And in the end, he couldn't fight the crew without sacrificing both of our lives. He saved me the only way he could.

"I'm… I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I'm sorry that I… violated you."

"You didn't," I blurted out. "Not at all. Don't be sorry about what happened in the mess hall. I'm not sorry. I just wish…"

"I meant what I said before. None of the crew will bother you. They're under orders not to be in the same room with you unless I'm with you."

"How can you be sure they'll behave themselves?"

"After I killed the captain and the others, I issued new orders to the entire crew. Once they saw what I did to Zol and the rest, they stopped resisting. Most of them hadn't signed up for that, anyway. They agree with me that it's better to not make enemies of the IPA."

"What about their weapons?" I asked. "What will stop them from overthrowing you in the same way?"

"All their weapons are locked up and I've been…" He shrugged again. "Let's just say they know what happens when someone threatens a Kavian's mate. No one will bother you. Trust me."

"Your mate? You said…" I broke off.

"I know. I didn't want to weigh you down with that, because it's not your problem. I'll deal with it. I'll live with it. It makes no difference to you, as a human."

So it was true. No wonder he looked so miserable. That brief encounter in the mess hall did something to him. It bound him to me in a way that gave him a visceral reaction when I was threatened.

But he was right that I wasn't biologically affected by any of it. I could walk away from him whenever… whenever I got back to Elysium.

Still, the idea left me with a knot in my stomach.

I looked up at him. "Will you be all right on VXC3? What will happen when you return to your people?"

"That will depend on the situation on the planet. The Ranxi might be attacking them again. They might be facing the same annihilation they suffered on Kavius. If that's the case, I belong with them. I'm tired of running. If there's a home to return to, even a temporary one, then I'll return there."

"What about the crew?" I asked. "If I take the Methuselah and leave, what will happen to them?"

"If you're concerned about the crew, you can take the escape shuttle instead and leave them with the ship. You can tell the IPA you fulfilled your mission of investigating the planet, and the crew turned on you to steal the ship. Hell, if you're so inclined, tell them the truth about me. They'll probably send the bounty hunters after me, but it'll be well-deserved."

"I wouldn't do that."

"You might. Anyway, tell me if any of the crew comes near you." He turned away, and this time, he didn't hesitate. "I'm sorry, Hazel." He strode away before I could say anything else.