Chapter 13

"You okay, Glow Stick?" Nina asked as Shamus dumped some more fairy dust on her, making her visible to Nina.

Was she okay? What she'd just witnessed, the beauty of the moment, how fearless she'd felt, had been one of the most memorable events in her life.

Yet, she felt exhausted. Completely fried to a crispy-crisp.

The euphoria of the event had dimmed, and now her limbs felt like wet noodles. It felt as though she could sleep for a thousand years. Did ghosts need sleep? Who was going to help her figure this ghost life out and tell her what she could and couldn't do?

But she didn't want them to see her rising panic at those thoughts. So Ralph smiled. "I'm okay, thanks. Are you guys okay? I know Nina doesn't feel the cold, but you do, Shamus."

He scooped her up in an unexpected hug.

Ralph let herself melt against him, not even questioning why she could feel his hard body against hers, simply grateful it was possible.

Though, the contact made her delirious with awareness. Every inch of his muscled thighs pressed to hers made her own legs shake. His broad chest against hers quickened her breathing. The scent he wore, musky and clean, bathed her nostrils, leaving her a little swoon-ish.

"Forget us and the cold. You were amazing in there," he whispered in her ear.

She leaned back in his embrace. "You saw us?"

Nina's voice was softer somehow when she responded. "We were outside the window like fucking peeping Toms with cans attached by string, eavesdropping. The Ghost Talker wanted to be sure you were okay. He narrated the shit going down for me. Sounds like you did good, kiddo. Bravo. Proud to say I know you."

Ralph blushed, but she couldn't take the credit. "I don't even know how it happened or how I knew what to do. I just knew. It's not about me at all. It's about this force I can't describe and the voice in my head, who, if I'm honest, can be a little impatient."

Setting her from him, Shamus clucked his tongue. "I'm more and more convinced you're a psychopomp, Ralph. You were perfection in there. Utterly selfless. It takes someone remarkably special to do what you did. To make sure a soul gets to the right place. You did everything right."

Ralph lifted her hair, twisting it around her hand, still feeling lightheaded and weak. "It's so strange when it happens, but it was just like with Gloria. There's this voice I hear in my head, soft, warm, reassuring, sometimes almost pushy… It tells me what to do, what to say. I'm pretty sure I can't take any credit at all."

Nina grinned at her "Take aaall the credit, kiddo. No fucking way could I be as patient as you are. Ghost Man is right, it takes a special bitch to do what you're doing. I salute you." She did a mock military acknowledgment, clicking the heels of her work boots.

Ralph's smile of appreciation was wan and weary. "I think I need to sit down."

Shamus's look grew concerned, his frown deepening the lines on his tanned forehead. "Are you okay? Tell me what's happening?"

Ralph managed to float to the SUV they'd driven in and climb inside. Since she'd been turned into a ghost, whenever she was contained, she floated around like a stray helium balloon. But tonight, she plunked right down onto the backseat.

"I don't know what's going on, but it happened when I prevented Gloria from leaving, too. I feel weak and drained, like I could sleep for a week."

The light in the ceiling of the SUV blinked on as Nina and Shamus got in. "Then sit your backside down and rest. Let's get your floaty keister back to the castle. We can talk about whatever the hell's goin' on there," Nina ordered, climbing in and pressing the start button, taking off like a ball shot from a cannon.

Ralph sat forward, taking deep breaths, so woozy and light-headed. The last time she felt this way, she'd ended up in Hell.

She had to tell them what Drucinda had said before she crossed with Kat. "Listen to me, Drucinda did give me some helpful information. She said to look for someone named Michael. Also, did you know there was a waiting room before you go wherever your eternity takes you?"

Shamus's nod was slow, his green eyes gleaming in the dark interior of the car. "Yep. What about it?"

"She said when a new spirit arrives, everyone goes to this waiting room, and all the spirits know when they get there. So why didn't I go to this waiting room? Why did I go to Nina's instead?"

Shamus took her trembling hand. "I've heard of it, but I didn't know that was the order of things. As to ending up at Nina's place? I'm still betting you were unpacking that box left by the prior owner at your bookstore. I think you must have had the Elvis painting in your hand, or maybe you were just touching it, near it, but the connection probably brought you to her castle."

She couldn't talk anymore for the spinning of her head. "I…I feel…awful."

Shamus pulled her close, letting her rest her head on his muscled shoulder. "Just rest, Ralph. We're not far."

Nina adjusted the rearview mirror, her eyes glittering in the dark car as she glanced at the screen in the SUV. "Just got a text from Wanda. Georgie and Dex are at the house. Our resident angels. Maybe now we'll finally get some fucking answers."

It wasn't long before they were driving up the winding path to Nina's castle, the bumps along the way making Ralph's stomach roll.

She gripped Shamus's arm, wincing. "Do ghost's feel…things? Like internally?"

Shamus's face expressed his worry as he cupped her chin, tipping it upward, running his thumb over her bottom lip. "Internally? Are you in pain, Ralph? What's wrong?"

"Not pain, per se, I just feel…off. My stomach's in an uproar, and my head is throbbing. I feel weak as a newborn. In fact, I feel exactly like I did after Gloria, and now I'm afraid…"

"You'll end up back in Hell," Nina finished for her, slamming on the brakes and putting the SUV in park. "Not if I have a fucking say in it. C'mon, let's get your glowing ass inside, where we can talk to Georgie and Dex."

Shamus scooped her up while Nina popped opened the door, but Ralph struggled. "You don't have to carry me, Shamus. I can walk. Really," she protested, but it sounded pathetically weak even to her own ears.

"I don't mind," he grumbled, hauling her upward and traipsing through the snowy, cold night into Nina's castle, where the women, Darnell, Arch, and who she presumed were Dex and George, immediately surrounded them.

He carried Ralph to Nina's red couch and gently set her down, where she somehow managed to stay put rather than floating to the ceiling.

Marty raced to her side, her pretty face full of worry. "Ooo, what happened, honey? Are you okay? Tell us what we can do to make you feel better without smothering you with hugs you can't feel and cookies and milk you can't eat."

Ralph chuckled lightly, her heart clenching with gratitude that she'd met these people who were so willing to help her.

Wanda leaned over the back of the couch, her eyes sympathetic and full of warmth as she tried and failed to cup Ralph's chin with no luck. Regardless, the sentiment was there.

"Nina told us what you did for Drucinda and Katriana. What a lovely moment, Ralph, but it looks as though it exhausted you. Is there anything I can get you to make you more comfortable?"

"Thank you, Wanda, but I'm okay. Just happy I'm still here and not down," she whispered, "there…"

A gorgeous woman with twinkling eyes and a broad smile came into view, a tall handsome man with raven-black hair and chocolate-brown eyes by her side. The woman tucked her hair over her shoulder, reaching out to place a hand on Ralph's arm.

"You're tired because you haven't fully transitioned, Ralph. "I'm George, by the way, and this is my husband, Dex. We're guardian angels."

"You can touch me?" Why was she more surprised George could touch her than the admission she was a guardian angel?

The beautiful woman nodded, her eyes warm and inviting, her face glowing. Literally. "I can because I'm of the heavenly variety, just like you. Or like you will be when we figure this out. Now, you," she said, pointing to the couch, "need to stay put and regain your strength while we talk. Deal?"

Dex and Shamus shook hands. "Good to see you again, Dex," he said with warmth in his gravelly tone.

Dex slapped him on the back. "You, too, buddy! How's my man Dale?"

"He's aces. Just aces. In fact, he's around here somewhere. The ladies were kind enough to pick him up from my place for me while we were gone. He'll sure be happy you're here."

Nina threw her arms around George, giving her a squeeze. "Wings! Haven't seen ya in a while. You look happy. You happy? 'Cause if you're not, I'll kick Dex's heavenly ass."

It was funny to see Nina in a moment that felt almost gregarious, light even. But it was also clear she cared about her past clients, despite all her grumbling.

"Did you miss me, Vampire Lady?" George asked on a saucy grin, giving Nina a kiss on the cheek.

"Nina," Dex said, opening his arms to the vampire with a deep laugh. "Bring it in, lady."

She gave Dex a hug, dropping a kiss on his cheek. "Ya look good, Dexie. How's the rescue?"

Dex smiled, handsome and easy. "The rescue's great. We've had a lot of adoptions and our new foster program is going crazy-good, thanks to all your networking. How's the business of accidental paranormals faring?"

She laughed with a roll of her eyes. "Same old same. Whining, crying, ‘oh, no, this can't be real'. Wah-wah-wah. You know, the uzhe bullshit, just a different day."

Ralph watched the exchange between them, and she couldn't help but remind Nina, she hadn't cried—not once. Or at least not in front of them.

"Hey! I didn't cry, and while I did say I couldn't believe this was real, so did you. Marty told me." She shot them a weak but satisfied smile.

Nina made a face, crossing her arms over her chest. "Marty's stupid and so's her memory."

Marty grinned. "Call me all the names you like, Bloodsucker, but I'm right. You carried on for days, even after you knew the paranormal was real, because I was already a werewolf when you were turned. So shut it, Vampire, and let's hear what George and Dex found out."

Dex sat on the love seat facing the couch, patting the place next to him for George, who scooped up Waffles, wheelchair and all, and plunked down next to him. Then Dex folded his hands together in his lap, gazing at Ralph as though what he was about to say, he was attempting to do so with caution.

When the room went silent, Ralph spoke up. "Whatever you're about to tell me is obviously paining you, but I'm ready for it. Or I think I am. This has been the weirdest week of my life and maybe, after these past couple of days, the greatest. So please don't think you have to spare my feelings. Just tell me what you know and I'll appreciate the help, no matter what."

Fighting a loud gulp, she force- swallowed her fear.

George's shoulders lifted when she sighed. "So like I said, I'm a guardian angel and so is Dex. You're a little like us, in that we help guide people here on Earth, most of them completely unaware. We're the invisible voice that says ‘danger!' or ‘maybe you should think twice before leaping.' Sometimes we make ourselves known, but mostly we're doing the work silently."

Interesting. Another piece of the puzzle clicked into place. "And my guardian angel?" Ralph laughed in irony, holding up a hand. "No, don't tell me. My angel's on vacation, or on a pub crawl, and forgot to show up?"

Dex cleared his throat. "Our boss, Titus, tells us your guardian angel never showed up because no one knows you died."

"Titus…" she murmured "Is he my boss, too?"

George popped her lips. "Sort of. Forget the angel hierarchy and focus on the fact that we don't know why you were overlooked. Especially because the properties you're displaying are, like Shamus told you, that of a psychopomp, and they're some of the most valuable players in all of the afterlife."

She'd heard this part before. She was special, rare, blah, blah, blah. She didn't feel very special or rare. She felt overwhelmed and weary of the unknown.

Ralph twisted a piece of her long hair around her finger. "I still don't know what that means, but if it means between crossing people to the other side, I'm always going to roam aimlessly with zero purpose, I'll take cleaning toilets in the afterlife for three-hundred, please, Alex. At least I'll know what my job description is."

"Alex died," Nina corrected. "He's up there in the Great Beyond somewhere, with his perfect fucking diction and dry snark. The new host is Ken Jennings. Ask me, I know. I fucking watch Jeopardy and Wheel every damn night."

Everyone groaned. "Shut up, Nina!" Marty chastised. "Let Dex and George finish."

But Dex's response was to laugh. "You will not roam aimlessly, Ralph. I promise you. We have word into Titus that you need help. He's on a very delicate mission right now, but he'll be back soon. Until then, we can help. At least from an afterlife standpoint."

Shamus, who'd sat quietly absorbing what the couple had to say, finally spoke. "So if Ralph's a psychopomp, why doesn't she have any earthly properties?"

Ralph sat up straight, a bolt of energy zinging through her. "Wait, what? What does earthly properties mean?"

Shamus shot her a look of pure guilt. "I think it's why you can still feel things. When I told you psychopomps are a lot like reapers, that's true, except they take only the most deserving to the other side."

"I know that. What does earthly properties mean, Shamus?" she demanded.

"Do you want me to explain?" Dex offered.

Shamus sighed, his wide chest expanding under his T-Shirt. "No. I should have told her sooner, but I didn't want to give her false hope."

A fit of anger spliced through her suddenly, triggering the residual resentments from her sheltered upbringing. The ones she'd buried deep while still alive. "Her is right here in the room, a whole-ass adult who's fully capable of hearing her entire fate, thank you very much."

She'd spent her whole life protected from everything. She loved her mother deeply. For the most part, she'd been an amazing single parent, but being sheltered the way she had left Ralph with lifelong consequences.

She was always afraid. Afraid to make a decision, afraid to take a chance, afraid she'd get hurt, or hurt someone in return.

Afraid.

Cautious.

Forever leery.

But she couldn't do that anymore. She had to know what she was up against and face it head-on. Especially if the consequence of not doing so was ending up in literal Hell.

Shamus grabbed her hand, his eyes sending her an apology. "I'm sorry, Ralph. I was being cautious because what's happening to you has grown into something beyond my scope. But I swear, I was only trying to make sure your ducks were in a row."

Ralph pulled her hand from his. "My ducks are fine. Now tell me what the hell you mean."

Shamus's glance was distraught but clearly resolute. "Being a psychopomp means you can choose to live here on this plane. Some things will be different, of course."

"Like?" she snapped.

"Like you don't need to sleep or eat if you choose not to?—"

"That's a huge perk," George interrupted with a smile. "And conversely, you can eat whatever you want and never gain any weight or have to worry about your cholesterol and your heart or anything! I eat chocolate cake by the slice and it doesn't all go to my hips?—"

Now Dex cut her off, patting her leg with a loving smile. He whispered, "Read the room, babe, and let Shamus finish."

Sorry, she mouthed to Shamus.

He dragged his hat off his head, letting it dangle in his hands. "Right. What George said, but it also means you're immortal, and you can basically resume your life here on this plane except for when you're needed in the afterlife."

She blinked, unsure whether she should feel elated or angry, confused or outraged.

She was all the things.

"So what you're telling me is, I can keep my bookstore, my apartment, Blanche Devereaux, my life? That my best friend Hazel's been traumatized by my death unnecessarily?"

Shamus looked directly into her eyes and nodded. "Yes. But I didn't know for sure what was going on. I couldn't have prevented what happened to you before I met you. I was just trying to look out for you, Ralph."

Yeah. Her mother used to say that, too.

I'm just looking out for your well-being, sweet girl. It's better you don't go to the school dance where they hide booze in the punch and someone could hurt you, or worse, rape you.

No, Raphaela, you can't go to the roller-skating rink, and I don't care how many parents are there. They're not me, and I have to work. Do you know all the bad things people could do if someone isn't watching out for you? It's better if you stay home.

Not a chance on Earth will I let you go on a school trip to Washington, of all places, where the supervision will be slack at best and you'll be gone for four days! Not a chance. I'm only looking out for you.

It's amazing that you were accepted to UCLA, sweet girl, but it's so far away. Don't you think you'd be better off attending college closer to me? So you're not so far away I can't help if you need me? I'm just looking out for you…

The list of things she couldn't do because her mother was just "looking out for her" had been endless. Eternal. Smothering.

And she'd allowed her guilt to keep her rooted in place. That was her fault.

Unfortunately, something snapped in her then, and for the first time, Ralph didn't stop to think about the zillion-and-one consequences it might create or even that it might hurt someone's feelings or that her anger was directed at the wrong person.

Instead, that piece of her, always restrained and careful, broke free.

Overwhelmed by her circumstances, exhausted from taking Kat and Drucinda to the afterlife, and in general, just wiped out, Ralph reacted.

She stabbed a finger at Shamus in accusatory fashion. "Fuck you, buddy," she muttered, before floating off like a two-year-old.