Chapter Thirteen Sam

I t was lucky that Gary was available the next morning because I hadn’t really thought it through when I made plans with Ace the night before. However, thanks to it not being a big laundry day, Gary was happy to take over the front desk for a couple of hours while I went out. And, judging by the contented, blissful expression permanently affixed to his features, I had a feeling he and Benny had a good night.

But I was still too caught up in my own feelings to grill him about it just yet. I’d spent nearly the entire night doing anything but sleeping. At first my brain wouldn’t stop bringing up the past and making me feel awful. And then, once I finally got that under control, I realized I was still rock hard and my dick, no matter what I did, was not going to give up. So, I did what any sane person would do. I pulled the box out from under my bed, lubed myself up, and fucked myself silly for an hour with my favorite silicone dildo.

Once I was sufficiently fucked and had cum all over my bed twice , I figured it was time for a shower. But by the time I got back to bed, I was too wired to sleep. So, out of habit, I grabbed a book from my nightstand and read. However, it wasn’t until I turned the last page and saw the early pinks of dawn outside my window that I realized I’d read the entire night away.

And yet, after all that, I still felt like I’d just drank an energy drink. My skin was pulsing, my heart rate never dipped back to a calm state, and my dick, despite all the attention I gave it, seemed permanently half hard. Of course, it probably didn’t help that I could still smell Calum and Erick on my skin. I didn’t have the heart to wash off their kisses in the shower, so my neck remained untouched. And that meant, whenever I turned my head, I caught a whiff of them. I couldn’t get enough of it either.

It worried me a bit that they’d gotten me so worked up. After my sudden departure and downward spiral, I thought I’d be able to push them from my mind. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t. When I closed my eyes, it was their faces I saw. When I let a hand dip down below my waistband in the early morning, it was their touch I thought about as I stroked myself. And when I came for the third time in twelve hours, it was their names on my lips that I wanted to cry out.

It scared the shit out of me.

That’s why, when Ace’s old beat-up truck pulled into the cafe parking lot, I already had pastries and coffee for us both. I hopped in the passenger side and handed him his coffee, already missing the warmth of the cup that kept the cold off my hands. I always hated winter for that one reason. My fingers got cold so easily.

“Sure you wanna go to the beach?” Ace asked, nodding out the front windshield where snow fell in large heavy flakes. “Probably not good weather for swimming.”

“Good thing we’re not swimming then,” I smiled, although it quickly faded. “It’s the only place where I know nobody can reach me. We’ll need your four-wheel drive just to get through the snow, anyway. I don’t think they plow the beach road.”

“They don’t,” Ace replied. “But you’re right. That won’t stop me.”

“Hopefully you’re down for a long talk. I got lots of donuts just in case and a couple slices of quiche.”

“I’ll listen as long as you need.”

Ace tipped his black cowboy hat in my direction and put the truck in gear, heading out of town. If there was one thing I appreciated about him it’s that he was a man of few words. He said what he meant and nothing more. With him, I never felt like I needed to interpret or pick through what he said to make sure I understood him. Not to mention, he was my oldest friend. Out of everyone in Shifter Grove, I trusted him the most. I knew he’d listen to me and have my back no matter what. And hopefully he could tell me what to do because I was at a loss for where to go from here.

Our conversation on the way to the beach was informal, a warm-up for the main event yet to come. He told me about his farm and how he and Matt were going to introduce livestock into the mix. They wanted to start with something small like chickens and ducks before expanding into pigs. It sounded like they had it all figured out, they just had to get the barn built to make sure they had space for the animals in the winter that would keep them out of the harsh cold. Besides, Ace’s garden was expanding at a rapid rate and he needed a place for all his supplies. Being the most popular vendor at the farmer’s market meant the garden got a bit bigger every year. It wouldn’t be long before they’d have to start hiring help.

I was glad to hear Matt was settling into all of it so easily. When he’d arrived in Shifter Grove, I’d been worried about him. He was one of the sadder cases I’d had in quite a while. And the way he snapped at Ace when they first met, I thought for sure he’d be up and out of town before I could help him. But now, after a little over a year, Matt and Ace were so happy they could barely stand it. They were growing together, building their lives, and making Shifter Grove an even better place to live. Hell, it wouldn’t be long before they were supplying the food needs of the entire hotel at the rate they were going.

Ace plowed through several snow drifts on the way down the beach road, somehow always managing to keep the truck under control. I didn’t worry. I just sipped my coffee and listened to him talk. However, when we pulled into the parking lot and Ace brought the truck to a stop, the cab went quiet. I stared out the window at Lake Huron, the frozen shoreline packed with tall ice and churned up sand while Ace waited for me to start speaking. I just wished I knew where to begin.

“Are you okay?” Ace asked, starting off the conversation first. “Your text worried me.”

“Yeah… I’m alright,” I sighed. “I’m just… I don’t know… in my head about some stuff.”

“Want to tell me what’s going on? I’ll try to help if I can.”

“I know you will. It’s just… hard to say I guess.”

“Take your time.”

It took me a moment to gather my courage. “Do you remember when you first came to town?”

“How could I forget?”

“You weren’t talking at all, and I was worried about you. So I’d come up to your room with food and I’d just talk enough for the both of us, so you didn’t have to.”

“I liked that,” Ace nodded, sipping his coffee. “It made me feel like I had a friend.”

“Do you remember some of the things I told you? About where I came from and the… guy I left behind?”

“Yeah.” Ace looked at me seriously. “Is he back or something?”

“God no! Holy shit!” I clutched my chest, my heart rate jumping through the roof. “That would have been a goddamn emergency trip to the hospital. I think would’ve spontaneously combusted on the spot.”

“Then what’s going on?”

“Well… I’ve been thinking about him a lot. Not because I want to,” I added. “But because he’s been cropping up at all the wrong times. Him and all those months I spent trying to get back on my feet before the hotel was a thing. Every time I want to be…” I took a deep breath. “ Intimate with someone, those old memories crop up and ruin it.”

“So, someone has come along that interests you?”

“I think so? Maybe? I… I don’t know,” I stammered. “Let’s call it a possibility.”

“What specifically is setting you off?”

“At first, I thought I was just being used, like I was a simple one-night stand. It reminded me of all those old guys and the way they used to paw at me. They’d tell me anything I wanted to hear to get me in bed and then disappear in the morning like I was nothing. So, I tried to resist getting involved with this new… person .”

I was purposefully avoiding the fact that there were two men after me. That was another conversation entirely. With Ace I wanted to keep things simple.

“Do you think he’s using you?”

“I did at first, but now I’m not sure. And it’s been so long since I’ve been with anyone… I guess I got cold feet.”

“That’s okay,” Ace replied. “If he’s a good guy, he’ll let you take things at your own pace. But you have to tell him too. It’s hard for people to know what you’re feeling if you don’t tell them.” He shook his head. “I had to learn that one the hard way.”

I couldn’t help a small grin. “I remember.”

“So, what does this have to do with your ex?”

My heart jumped again, images of him rushing through my brain. It took me a moment to push it back down, but Ace was more than happy to wait. When I finally had my thoughts back under control, I took a deep breath.

“Do you think it’s possible to have more than one mate in a lifetime?”

Ace didn’t flinch or even act surprised. “Of course. Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I’ve known plenty of wolves that have lost a mate or broken up when things didn’t go well. The mate bond is wonderful, but it doesn’t fix every problem. Some wolves forget a relationship needs work even if you’re meant for one another.” He took another sip of his coffee. “And many of those wolves have gone on to find a second mate. Sometimes it takes a while and sometimes it never happens. But it’s not impossible.”

“I thought my ex was my mate,” I said, my voice hollow and sad. “But when we had the chance to be together… well… he chose comfort. And the worst part is, I can’t blame him. But I really thought there would never be another wolf for me.” I took a long pause. “I… I think I was wrong.”

Ace finally turned, a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. “You think you found your mate?”

I nodded. “Maybe… but I’m terrified.”

“Yeah. I get that. It’s scary as hell. I was terrified of Matt.”

“To be fair, Matt can be scary.”

Ace chuckled. “He sure is. And when I nearly screwed it all up to begin with, I was really scared then. Despite everything we went through, I’m glad we took the time to figure it out. And I’m glad I didn’t run away from it. I can’t imagine my life without him now.”

I sat there for a long moment, letting those words sink in. Even after everything Ace had gone through, the years of heartache and loneliness, he was still able to open up to Matt and let him in. And because he was willing to take that chance, he’d been rewarded with happiness that knew no bounds.

So maybe, if I just tried to let myself feel again and trusted my guy, I could have the same kind of happiness.

“Do you believe it’s possible to have more than one mate at once?”

Ace’s eyebrows shot up. “Maybe? If it’s possible to have more than one in a lifetime, maybe you can have two at the same time. Although I’ve only heard rumors of such a thing. I’ve never seen it with my own eyes.” He gave me a good once over. “Why do you ask?”

“Just curious.” I took a quick sip of my coffee and grabbed the donut bag, trying to break the tension and change the subject all at once. “You want one?”

Ace just sighed, repositioning his hat. He knew exactly what I was doing. “Sure.”

And that was the last we spoke of it. We spent the rest of our time just catching up and eating sweets until it was nearing noon. Ace had a farm to get back to and I had a hotel to run, so we headed back once we realized the time. But when he pulled up outside the hotel, I stopped in the passenger seat for just a moment.

“Thanks for talking with me, Ace. It helped a lot.”

He smiled, tipping his hat. “I didn’t say much, but I’m glad to help.”

“Also, I think I found you someone to help build the barn,” I added. “He might even be interested in longer term work if you need it.”

“New tenant?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, send him my way and we’ll see if he’s got the stuff.”

“I’ll do that.”

I made to leave before I stopped, the door only halfway open. Turning back, I threw my arms around Ace and pulled him into a tight hug.

“Thanks for being my best friend,” I said, giving him a squeeze.

He hugged me back, his hat nearly falling off his head. “Anytime, buddy.”