Chapter 24

CHAPTER 24

ASHER

M ia eyes me up when I walk into the office. I’m not in the mood for this.

I didn’t mean to lose my cool with Derek, but what else was I supposed to do? He looked like a goddamn ghoul as he stared at her, leaning close, getting ready to lay his hand on her. He’s got no right to touch her. Nobody does except for me.

Mia knocks on my office door, twisting hair around her finger. It’s not just that she has the same name as my ex that gets to me. She keeps trying to get my attention when I’ve been pretty clear with her, not to mention she isn’t Holly.

“Mia, this is getting out of hand,” I say before she can even open her mouth. “I’m your boss. I’m not interested in screwing my employees. Let’s keep this professional, okay?”

She stares at me, tears in her eyes. Then, she suddenly turns and walks away.

I lay my head in my hands. Dammit. I didn’t mean to upset her like that. My mood won’t settle, not after the argument with Holly, plus the shit Derek pulled.

A few minutes later, Dan appears at my door. He’s got a big smile on his face, looking like he’s still buzzed from last night.

“Sup, brother,” he says, dropping into the chair opposite, grinning from ear to ear, the happiest I’ve seen him in a long time. “The date went so much better than I thought it would, even after you sulked your ass out of the running.” He’s lost in his own world, which is good. He can’t see how miserable I am. “I won’t go into detail, but it’s safe to say I’m feeling very chill today. It’s not just the physical stuff, though. We’ve already arranged a second date. Don’t worry. Not a double this time.”

I manage a weak smile. “Ha, good.”

He stands. “Just wanted to swing by and tell you, no hard feelings, you hear? You’re a good friend, even if you are a crappy wingman.”

He turns.

I stand. “Dan, wait.”

He faces me, still smiling, still oblivious. “Yeah?”

This is my chance. I’m chickening out. He could already have a message from Derek waiting for him in his inbox with a recording of me calling his sister, the little Tarantino who followed us around as kids, “my woman.”

“I’m glad the date went well.”

He beams. “Me too.”

Once he leaves, I drop into my chair. I should talk to Mia. One of my team members is a blackmailing asshole, and I’ve pushed another way.

My phone vibrates.

Holly: Derek has agreed to give me some time. I’m going to make this right. Please tell me you haven’t told Dan anything.

Me: I haven’t, I reply, but I should. I’m being a coward. That’s the only thing that’s stopping me.

Holly: Please, don’t do anything rash. I can salvage this. I know you think I’m immature, but I’m more capable than you give me credit for.

Me: You’re not immature, I reply. I lost my temper earlier. You’re more mature than me. You’re the one who says we need to stop. For me, Snowflake, even with everything falling down around us, I still don’t want to.

She doesn’t text back. I stand, deciding I need to apologize to Mia. Whatever else is happening, I shouldn’t be snapping at my employees.

She’s not at her desk.

Perhaps she’s gone to HR. Another mess I’m unable to clean up.

Me: Any news from the douchebag? I text around an hour later, the most unproductive hour of my working life.

Holly: Nothing yet. I’ll keep you updated. How’s your day going apart from all this craziness?

Me: Terribly , I tell her. One of my employees, Mia, has been making eyes at me. We had an interaction at a bar, too, where I got the same vibes. Earlier, I snapped, telling her I wouldn’t sleep with my employees. My best friend’s sister, sure, but not my employees … That’s how much of a hero I am.

Holly: Whoa, you ARE in a dark mood.

Me: Can you blame me?

Holly: Have you spoken to Mia?

Me: Not yet. She disappeared, probably to get my ass fired. After everything we’ve done, it’s better than I deserve. I almost told Dan earlier. He came by to talk about his date. He was so happy; I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

Holly: I’m sorry for how things went with Mia, she texts. Thank you for not telling Dan. I still think there’s a way out of this.

Me: Is there a way that includes us being together, Snowflake?

Holly: You know the answer to that. I will say (and this is bad, major mixed signals territory) I’m relieved you haven’t got another Mia on your Christmas list.

I smile despite myself, despite everything.

Me: There’s only one woman on my list, and I’m her not-so-secret Santa.

Holly: Whatever else happens, we’ll always have those memories. You at the toy drive. The dinner. The climbing center …

Me: They might seem small to other people, but to me, Snowflake, they’re everything.

Holly: I feel exactly the same.

I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to let her go. Let’s say I continue working here—which was always the plan—how will I handle seeing her around the office, maybe with other men? How am I going to survive knowing we can never be together?

When Mia returns to the office, I approach her desk. I can’t let my bad mood infect everybody else.

“Mia, can we talk?”

She looks up at me with panic in her eyes.

In my office, I say, “I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.”

You see, it’s just that the idea of being with anybody other than my Snowflake is anathema to me.

“I think I’ve given the wrong impression, sir,” she mutters. “I never wanted … that. It was just before your predecessor left. She mentioned I might be able to get a raise. I’ve been trying to figure out how best to raise the topic. I don’t want to be presumptuous, but …”

I laugh, shaking my head in disbelief. I have been an ass.

“I’m not laughing at you,” I tell her quickly. “I just can’t believe how wrong I was. I’m sorry, Mia, truly. Let me find my footing. I’ll keep a close eye on you and review your previous projects, too. I’ll also assess my predecessor’s notes.”

She smiles. “Thank you.”

“No, thank you for not flying off the handle at me. You had every right after how I behaved earlier.”

“I’ve got a boyfriend,” Mia mutters. “Just so you know …”

“I’ve got a girlfriend,” I say reflexively.

She leaves. Why did I say that? Oh, that’s right.

I want it to be true.

I do my best to focus on my work. Before I came here, it was my main passion in life. It was like meditation. I could sit at my desk, home in on a project, and hours would go by without realizing it.

Not anymore.

Maybe I need a no-cell phone policy. I leap on it when it rings.

Snowflake? I almost say before I hear Mom’s voice.

“Asher?” As usual, she sounds apologetic.

“Mom? Is everything okay?”

“My volunteer team leader at the church has received some disturbing emails. They mention you and Holly. I’m so sorry to do this.”

“What sort of emails?” I growl.

“Calling you and Holly vicious, ugly names, names I won’t repeat. He’s saying he has videos of me from …” She sniffles, barely holding back tears. “… from when I was an addict. An active addict, I mean.”

I curl my hand into a fist, ready to tear his throat out. “Are you at home?”

“Yes.”

“I’m coming right to you. Stay where you are. I love you, Mom. You don’t need to worry.”

I hang up, then call Holly.

“Asher …”

“He’s emailing my mom’s volunteer team leader at the church,” I snap. “Calling you and me names, threatening he has videos of my mother. He’s gone off the goddamn rails. We need to kill his leverage so he can get the punishment he deserves.”

“Kill his leverage, meaning …”

“Tell Dan.”

She sighs. “I—oh, fuck—I don’t know. What are you doing now?”

“I’m going to see Mom. She needs to be comforted. Do you want to come?”

She gasps. “Do you want me to?”

I didn’t plan on making the offer, but now that I have, I know I want her there. “She cares about you.” We both do.