6. tell you in the morning

tell you in the morning

Fisk

"You can officially consider me won over. That's it. I'm never leaving."

Fisk smirked to himself as Lily set down her fork, her plate now as empty as his was. They had barely talked over dinner, both too famished to do anything beyond eat, but he had known throughout the entire meal that he had won her over, if that was actually possible.

He was still unsure of how much of what she was saying was teasing and how much of it was her being serious, but if she was even considering the possibility of returning to his beach house, of working from his home, of returning for just the cooking, he would take it. Anything to keep her in his life; he was desperate enough to not complain.

He knew the sexual attraction was there for her, the physical attraction as well, but for him, it was so much more than just that. Yes, she was beautiful and attractive, but she was also intelligent, funny, someone he could enjoy even just sitting in silence with. Eating dinner in silence should have been awkward, but instead, he enjoyed the little glances and smiles they shared between bites.

He had enjoyed the way their legs kept bumping as they sat beside each other at the counter even more.

"I told you I'm a pretty good cook," he teased her. "Are you ready for the bath I promised you, or would you prefer to explore more of the house?"

"Mmm, a bath sounds perfect," she hummed as she stretched her arms over her head and arched her back. "But only if you join me, of course."

"Of course," he assured her, his cock already half hard at the prospect of touching her again. "Head on up. I'll get these dishes washed then join you."

"What?" she asked, raising her brow slightly in confusion.

"No staff, remember?" he teased her. "Means that after I make a mess cooking, I also have to clean."

She wrinkled her nose slightly before shaking her head no. "Then I'll help you."

"You're my guest," he insisted.

"Yes, and you cooked dinner. The least I can do is help you clean up after."

His mind and soul were both warring at the very idea of her helping him clean up. He was trying to impress her, to show that he could care for her every need, that she would never have to lift a finger again if she chose not to. She was his perfect match, his soulmate, the one person he would give anything and everything to. He would gladly do everything for her.

And yet, the other part of him wanted to say yes simply so she would be near him, sharing in such a simple, mundane task as washing dishes.

"I can't tell you no to anything," he finally answered, shaking his head slightly before stepping down off the barstool and grabbing his plate.

"And besides, if we work together, that means we'll be in the bath together even sooner."

He grinned as he headed around to the sink and turned on the hot water. "I like that plan. Here, if you bring me the dishes, I'll start washing, and then you can set them on the drying rack."

There weren't many dishes, and within a few minutes, he was almost done washing everything while she stood beside him, waiting for each item he handed over after rinsing it. He only had the pan to finish, which he would towel dry once he was done, and then he could have her upstairs and naked in his arms as his fingers explored her.

Fingers, not tentacles. Not yet.

He knew he still had to tell her the truth, but the more time that passed, the bigger his secret felt. He should have told her sooner, that morning or in the pool. He shouldn't have given in and had her naked the second she was in the door, should have waited. He shouldn't have invited her to his house, where he would now have a memory of her in his space, a memory of what it was like having her in his life.

Because if she left now, after he knew it was even a possibility that he could have her for the rest of their lives...

"What are you thinking about so hard?" she asked, interrupting his thoughts.

He shook his head slightly as he began rinsing the soapy water off the pan then turned off the water once he was done. "Nothing. Just...you."

"Well of course you're thinking about me," she teased, but when he looked up, he could see the concern in her eyes.

He had done that, had made her worry. And now, he felt the need to kiss those worries away.

Forget hand-drying the pan. She was more important.

Fisk set the pan down in the sink, still wet but at least upside down, before reaching for Lily and pulling her to him. He hadn't kissed her in so long, her lips no longer looked well kissed, and as he pulled her close, he felt his inner monster start to rise with the need to sink his teeth in once more. The fear of losing her was building in both sides of him. He had to keep her, had to do it right, had to show her she wanted him as much as he needed her.

His kiss was rushed and hard as he pressed her back against the counter, needing her so badly, he was scared he would shatter if he let go. She kissed him back, but he knew it was too much, so he pulled away, apologizing under his breath as he shook his head. "Fuck, sorry. I shouldn't have... I realized I hadn't kissed you in so long, and then I needed to, needed to kiss you again, to remind myself you were really here, and—"

He was saying too much, and he cut himself off as he took a step back.

He was so afraid of losing her when he told her the truth, he was going to push her away before he even had the chance.

"Stop."

Just one word from her lips, and he was frozen. He couldn't breathe, couldn't even think as he looked up at her, even his heart seemingly stopping in his chest.

"Stop overthinking."

He wasn't overthinking. He was no longer thinking at all.

"You look terrified," she whispered as she approached him, removing the distance he had only just put between them. "Like you're scared of pushing me away. And that's crazy because..."

She stopped herself, licking her lips as she seemed to search for the right words. He wanted to help her find them, wanted to know everything she was thinking, but he had no clue what she even wanted to say, what she was even feeling.

"This was a crazy, stupid hookup. That's all this was supposed to be," she whispered, her hand raising slowly until her fingers were almost touching his cheek. "A weekend of fucking, but...but you should know, this is not..."

She was still searching for the right words, he could tell, and he waited, breath still held and heart still stopped.

Because if he said anything in that moment, it would certainly be the wrong thing.

"Please tell me you feel it too," she asked, her voice very quiet. "The...magnetism? I don't know how else to describe it, but since we connected on the app, it's like there's a magnet pulling me towards you, and I don't want to fight it. If you feel it too, then stop fighting it. I don't know where this is going, but—"

"Yeah, I feel it too," he admitted, knowing it was so much more than magnetism . He was drawn to her, connected to her, would never find another like her. "I'm... Yeah, I'm scared I'll push too hard, but you're here in my home, and it's killing me to not keep touching you, to not show you... I know it was a joke about never leaving, but if you asked to stay, I would never tell you no."

He finally took a breath as her fingers touched his cheek, and instant warmth spread through him. He hadn't even realized how cold he was until he felt her touch, but now that he had, he was leaning into her, unable to pull away.

"It's like we're a perfect match." She sounded as breathless as he felt.

She had no clue how perfect they were, how perfect she was for him, how perfect he was for her. Had no clue that his soul was already fitting in with hers, trying to keep her bound to him forever. Had no clue that when he had promised her anything and everything, he truly meant it.

"I guess the app was right," he answered instead.

Now was the time to tell her the truth. Now was the time to tell her what she was to him, who he was.

But before he could choke out the words, her hand was pulling from his face, taking her warmth with her. He sucked in a breath, the ice now flooding through him once more, but then he looked down to see she was undoing the tie on her robe, then his.

His hands lifted but didn't touch, not until she reached out and took his hands, guiding them inside her robe to touch her skin. He was reverent as he touched her, his hands sliding over her belly to her sides then down to her hips. He couldn't think as her hands moved touch him, her fingers resting on his chest then moving up to his shoulders.

He needed her, needed her now. Needed to show her in his touch all the things he was still too afraid to say out loud. Needed to show her they were made for one another, that he couldn't live without her.

"Why don't we go upstairs and get in the bath?" she asked, her voice sounding shaky.

"Lily," he whispered, his eyes moving back up to meet hers. She looked nervous, almost shy, and suddenly, he knew whatever was happening, he wasn't about to take her upstairs and fuck her. Whatever this was, it was a continuation of the jacuzzi, when he had kissed her simply because he needed to kiss her, to connect with her, to feel her. She had told him out there that the feelings weren't one sided, that she wanted to know him more.

She had to know the truth, had to know all of him.

"Lily, I have to tell you something."

He couldn't breathe as she stared up at him, her eyes seeming to stare straight into his soul.

It wouldn't be hard for her to do. She was one half of it.

"Have you lied to me?" she asked, her eyes still locked on his.

"No," he answered, knowing the guessing game would never get them to what he needed to say.

"Are you going to hurt me?"

"Never," he insisted, his touch on her tightening slightly at the thought.

"Do you... This between us, do you feel—"

"So much more than you realize," he whispered, aching to tell her the whole truth but not knowing how.

"And... will it make me run away screaming?"

"I hope not."

"No wife? No kids? No—"

"There's no one but you, Lily, and there will never be anyone like you ever again."

She was still staring up at him, waiting for him to tell her more.

"You're... You really are my dream. You've haunted me more nights than I'll ever admit, and I always hoped I would run into you again, and now, you're here. The way I want you, the way I need you... I would give anything and everything to keep you here."

She looked almost scared as she pressed her lips together, and he knew she wanted to say something but was figuring out how to say it.

Maybe he was a coward, but he was going to wait to hear what she wanted to say before he went any further.

"This was... I'm not the settling down kind of girl, Fisk. Love has never been in the cards for me. This was supposed to be a hookup, nothing more." Her eyes didn't look away from his as she paused, and he could see tears starting to form in her eyes. "But being with you... It makes me think maybe I just hadn't found the right person worth settling down with. Someone who looks at me and touches me like you do. Someone I can tease, who teases me back. Someone who fucks me like they can't live without me. Someone I can even sit in silence with. Let me live in my fantasy tonight, and in the morning..."

He couldn't believe his ears as he looked down at her, speechless and in awe. Was she already feeling the effects of their bond, even without his bite on her skin? Did she feel the same way he did? Did she understand, somehow, just how much he needed her like he needed the sea?

"I know it's stupid and crazy, and I'll probably yell in the morning about whatever it is, but tell me then. After tonight. After you touch me like... like this is more. Like this is more than a weekend hookup. Like I'm going to stay."

"I'll tell you in the morning," he promised, one of his hands pulling from her waist to brush a tear now running down her cheek. "I'll tell you everything, and then you can decide if you want to stay, but tonight, I'm going to carry you upstairs and show you how much I need you, what I feel for you, and then—"

She leaned towards him, and he gratefully took the opening to stop talking, knowing if he said anything more, he would tell her. He would show her how much he loved her, how much he would always love her. She kissed him hard, as hard as the kiss that had forced him to step back earlier, and in seconds, they were pushing each other's bathrobes off before he was picking her up and wrapping her legs around his waist.

The time for talking with words was done, at least until morning, when he would tell her the truth of his whole self.

"I want it," she whispered against his lips. "Show me everything and then tell me."

He truly hoped she meant it.

Fisk stared at Lily as she took in another slow, deep breath, now asleep. He had done as he promised, first washing her hair and then her body, using his soaps so she smelled just like him before he pulled her into his lap and fucked her in the tub.

No, he hadn't fucked her. That was no longer the right word.

He had loved her, loved her with every fiber of his being.

No, not with every fiber. That wasn't right either.

Even as his tentacles had burned to be free and his fingers had clung to her skin harder than they should, he had kept his other half down, not losing control even when she had broken their kiss to scream his name as she orgasmed again and again. He had carried her to bed when the water had started to grow cold, and there, he had fucked her into the mattress until she was sobbing, begging him to give her another orgasm with one breath then cried she couldn't orgasm again with another.

When he had finished, the careful control he had held onto for so long finally slipped, and he had felt his cock start to grow inside her. Her eyes had rolled back in her head, and for a second, he was sure she had blacked out. That was enough to force his monster dormant once more, and when she finally opened her eyes and spoke again, it was only to look at him and beg him to hold her until they fell asleep.

And now, he was doing just that, holding her close to his chest as he watched her sleep, listening to her heartbeat beating in time with his own.

His beautiful, perfect soulmate.

She was everything he had ever dreamed of and so much more.

And in the morning, he would have to tell her, knowing that once the truth was out, he might lose her entirely.

She had only been back in his life for a day, and he couldn't imagine ever going another without her in it.

He needed to clear his head, to find the words so that when she woke up, he had a plan. The only way he could do that was in the sea. He could stretch out his tentacles and perhaps find the rest of the relief he had been denying himself while inside her.

It was painful to pull himself from the bed, but it was for the best, he was sure of it. Every step he took from her side felt wrong, and as he reached the bedroom door, he nearly turned around, wanting to pull her back into his arms. There was a real possibility this would be his only night with her, and he wanted to savor every second of it.

But, no. For as much as he was a man, he was also a sea monster. Both parts of him needed release, and until she knew the truth, he would have to find what solace he could in the sea, swimming until his tentacles were as tired as his human form and he could finally rest at her side.

And he needed a plan. He needed to know what to say, needed to know how to say it.

Every step was like walking through cement, but he was not to be deterred. Once he reached the salty waves and the sand, it would grow easier, he kept telling himself. He would feel better once he was out of the confines of his human form. He would feel more at peace once he was free.

But as he finally reached the crashing waves and felt the water swirl around his bare feet, he couldn't move.

Not when his mate was in his bed and alone. Not when his other half was so close but not yet wholly his.

He had to tell her the truth, the whole of it, not just small pieces. He had to show it to her as well. He never should have let it get this far, never should have let himself give into his carnal desires until he had at least begun telling her the truth of who he was, what the app had meant when it called him her perfect match. She had asked him if he'd ever lied to her, and while he had never told her any, it still felt like he had lied by omission. She had a right to know, had a right to know who she was sleeping with, what she was sleeping with. She had trusted him, and he had broken that trust by not telling her as soon as she was in his arms, long before she was in his bed.

But how could he resist her, when she was everything he had ever dreamed of, both as his mate and as the woman he could never forget?

There was a tugging in his heart and soul, and as Fisk stared out across the open water, he realized for the first time that it was not a pull towards the sea.

It was her. She was pulling him back to her.

That was where he would go, because for as long as he had always found solace and peace deep in the ocean, that was no longer true.

She was the only place he would ever feel at home again.

In the morning, he would tell her the truth, the whole of it. He would wake up early and bring her down to watch the sunrise, and then, he would tell her everything.

She would either accept him as he was, or...

No. He couldn't think like that, not after the talk they had. Not after how she had stared at him in the kitchen, tears building in her eyes as she begged him to wait until morning so she could live in her fantasy. When she had looked up at him like that, he hadn't been able to comprehend what it was she was feeling, but now, as he turned to walk back towards the house, back towards her, he knew what it was.

Love. She had felt loved and in love.

She could feel it too. There was no denying it. She wanted him as much as he wanted her, for more than just sex.

The bond between them, even without his bite on her skin, linking them together… She could already feel it.

He just had to be brave enough to tell her why.

The heaviness in his soul lightened with every step, the journey now an easy one, compared to how he had been forcing himself out to the beach earlier. As he climbed the stairs to his bedroom, he felt only peace. When he finally stepped into the room itself, his eyes instantly went to the bed, wanting to paint a picture in his mind of what she looked like, naked and loved, in his bed.

If she did leave him in the morning, it wouldn't be last forever. That was what he had to keep telling himself, that the string that pulled him back to her instead of into the sea would lead her back to him one day. He just had to be patient and wait.

She started moving in the bed, her hand seeking something in front of her, and he realized, in shock, that her hand was touching where he had been a few minutes earlier. Even in her sleep, she was searching for him.

He wouldn't leave her searching any longer.

His feet were still sandy from the beach, but he didn't care as he crossed the room and slipped into the bed beside her, one arm under her head as the other wrapped around her middle. Almost immediately, his racing heartbeat slowed to match hers, and she let out a sigh of relief as she nuzzled her face against his chest, taking in a deep breath before settling. His lips pressed a kiss to her forehead as he held tight, not wanting to let go.

She fit as perfectly in his arms as she fit in his life, filling in the missing part of himself that was made just for her.

He wouldn't lose her. He couldn't lose her. Not when he was made to love her.

In the morning, she would know everything. After that, he would figure out his next steps and do everything in his power to convince her to stay.

Because no matter what, she was his.

His perfect match.