25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

Winnie

Am I wrong for not talking to Telke almost the whole day?

But...

I've already explained it to him. He should understand.

I tilt my head to the side as I stare at the television from the comfort of my couch, waiting for the lasagna to cook in the microwave. I suppose I should make myself better food than the instant ones, but I don't feel the drive to do a thing.

It wasn't like I hurried to leave the school just for Telke to chase behind me to ask for forgiveness for nothing. But... I thought...

I shake my head. "What's wrong with me?" I shout as I stare at the ceiling. I'm the only being here, so...

Ossa meows and hops onto my lap.

Fine... I'm the only human here, and hopefully Ossa won't find me too weird.

"Ossa... You're such a cute little cat." I stroke his back as he cuddles with me. He sits with his legs under his body, almost looking like a loaf of freshly made bread.

"Look... I don't know what to do. Does Telke feel something for me? But you know me, I shouldn't be dating anyone."

Ossa says nothing, not even a meow.

I sigh. "Why am I talking to a cat anyway...?"

"I need to rebuild everything. It already took a lot for me to buy him tacos that day. Maybe I should have told him, but... I guess my ego got in the way. Now I can't afford your cans."

Ossa meows and stands, almost as if he understands me.

I'm about to apologize and tell him that I was joking when the microwave dings.

Fine... I just know there's no way Ossa can understand my words. He just somehow always knows when the microwave will ding a second before that happens. I don't understand how, but it is what it is.

I get my lasagna, pull a fork, and head back to the couch.

Ossa comes around and sniffs my food. My mouth waters at the tomato sauce and cheese. There's a reason for me to keep a ton of frozen ones in the fridge, just in case.

When I'm down, good food always helps.

Except I'm not exactly down, I'm confused.

Ossa finds his way on my lap again. He likes to make it hard to do anything.

I lift the container of the lasagna and shove food into my mouth. It tastes the same every single time, which I enjoy a lot. There's nothing better than getting what I expected.

What's Telke doing? Is he having dinner too?

I hope he won't be upset because of me. I know he probably won't. I'm not that important.

"Ossa..."

He meows, but he doesn't even look at me. He knows I'm not feeding him when I'm eating, so he doesn't even bother to glance at me.

"Do you like Telke? The big guy with four arms."

Ossa does his cat thing and ignores me.

I take another bite of my lasagna. My stomach rumbles, wanting more. Maybe if I don't stop overthinking things, I won't even survive. One needs food.

At least the cheese is comforting and reminds me of good times.

"Ossa, is it a good time when we are here together? We have each other and that's probably it. Telke made me buy him tacos, though, so... about your cans..."

He meows and peeks at me probably isn't fazed by my reused joke.

I shrug. "It's okay. I bet I can figure out a way to make him pay for food next time."

But I don't want to trick anyone. I suppose it's just food and that'd only make us even, so it won't hurt anyone. but...

Maybe I shouldn't do that. I had it bad with beings taking my money and everything.

I put the lasagna on the table, freeing a hand to stroke Ossa's stomach. He rolls over and lets me. "Ossa, look at you. You're still a chubby kitty cat despite everything happening around you. Sometimes, I wish I were a cat like you, then I didn't have to worry about things, and I don't have to be the one rebuilding everything."

But I wasn't a cat, so...

I still have to be here to solve my problem.

There's a piece of paper on the coffee table that screams cruelly at me.

I sigh as I stare at the back of it, which I've already read the front and wouldn't want to look at it again. "Ossa, if we still have the money, we'd be golden and not here counting the days until I get my first paycheck from the school."

He purrs, probably waiting for the cans I'm buying him.

I pat him again. "I'm calling the bank tomorrow, maybe they will move my billing date. Then I'd save on interest."

He doesn't say anything this time. I hope it means he is confident in me. That's if he can even understand me from the beginning.

I used to be good at money. I still am, except I didn't have anything for a while, and...

It's okay, when the money hits the bank later, I'll solve most of the issues. If I built savings before, I can do that again.

"Ossa, I'm not trusting anyone again."

He meows and peeks at me with his cute watery eyes.

"What? Do you think that's a bad idea?"

He meows again. He may as well be telling me that the lasagna isn't getting any hotter, so I should be eating instead of thinking about silly stuff.

If I'd never trusted anyone, then I wouldn't be in this situation.

I silently laugh at myself as I continue with my food. Given how bad things were, it probably doesn't matter whether I used to share finance with my ex, I'd be fucked, regardless. He'd find a way to take my money to solve his dumb issues, whatever it takes.

Why didn't I see through him earlier? Then I could have left before he could put his hands on my stuff.

Why didn't I find out what was happening earlier? Then I could have stopped his stupid plan to save his stupid failing business.

Maybe I'm too trusting, or... too dumb... or... too na?ve to think that things will turn for the better.

I'm not repeating that, not that Telke bets on stuff and lost his ass. At least he doesn't look like that kind of guy.

But...

I shake my head at myself.

I'm just fooling myself. If I were good at spotting that, I wouldn't be here. Seeing that I'm not good at that, maybe I should keep my distance from everyone, including him. That's if he even cares that much about me.

"Ossa... I do envy you."

He stands and puts his hands on my hand that's holding the container of the lasagna. He peeks and watches my food. I don't understand this cat.

"You know you can't... Are you trying to say that if I were a cat, I can't be having lasagna? Maybe you have a point."

I still don't understand cats. Sometimes, he acts as if he understands me, but sometimes... It's just cats being cats, after all.

Telke...

I still miss him. There's warmth in my stomach when I think about it. But I don't know what I should think about that. Maybe my gut feeling has been broken and that's why I ended up in this situation...

"Ossa, do you like Telke?"

He meows again. He hops off my lap and heads to the door, patting the door frame with his forelegs.

I tilt my head to the side as I watch him. He's not a dog and won't be asking for a walk. So... what's he doing there other than that spot being where Telke left his shoes when he was here?

I rub my temple and sigh. What's wrong with me? Asking Ossa about important things is like asking a coin before I toss it, as if that'll change a thing and as if a coin can understand me and tell me the right thing to do. I really should know better than that.

But at the same time... how bad would it be if I gave Telke and me a chance, if that's even something he remotely wants?

I miss his hugs and his grins. So...