Chapter Fifteen

Zara

I thought I was close to Tanner before his visit to Sabrina, but now I feel as though there's an unbreakable bond between us. He was really emotional on Monday afternoon. Sure, he was angry with his ex, confused by her choices, and worried about Nash, but there was more to it than that.

He was vulnerable.

I could see it in his eyes and hear it in his voice.

What happened that afternoon and evening changed everything between us.

After he took me up against the wall, he carried me through to the bedroom, and once we'd got our breath back, he made love to me again… for hours. It was like he'd got that urgent need out of his system, and what followed was gentle and sweet, and so, so satisfying.

He stayed the night, holding me close to him while we slept, and then he came over straight after work the next night, bringing a change of clothes with him.

"You don't mind, do you?" he said, eyeing the bag he'd just put on the floor, as he held me.

"Of course not. I was gonna suggest it, anyway."

He smiled. "Good. I thought that if I could shower here, we could spend a little longer together in the morning."

That sounded perfect to me, and when he left for work, my body still humming from the orgasms I'd had an hour or so earlier, he asked me to go to his place that evening.

"Shall I bring some clothes with me?" I asked.

"Of course."

He kissed me then, and left, giving me a wave when he got to the sidewalk.

I had a few minutes before I needed to leave for work, and I used that time to pack a bag, so I wouldn't have to waste any time and could go straight to his place after school. And that's exactly what I did last night, arriving there just minutes after he'd closed the shop.

His bed is much bigger than mine, and we made love in it for hours, rolling around from one side to the other, until hunger got the better of us, and we went downstairs for something to eat. Tanner suggested we leave the dishes and return to bed, and I wasn't about to argue, although we only made it to the stairs before I felt his hand between my legs and turned to face him.

"I thought we were going to bed."

"I'm not sure I can wait that long." He smiled at me, pulling me down so I was sitting on the step, and I frowned up at him.

"What can we do on the stairs?" I asked, and he grinned, kneeling and parting my legs.

"You'd be amazed, babe."

He wasn't wrong. I was not only amazed, I was exhausted by the time we completed our climb nearly an hour later.

We fell asleep then, which I guess wasn't surprising, although he woke me in the early hours. I thought he might want to make love, but he just kissed me and held me close.

"I love you so much, Zara," he whispered.

"I love you, too."

He sighed, like he was happy, and we both drifted off to sleep again.

Lying in his arms is glorious. Waking up beside him is the best feeling in the world… and as for showering together… it's spectacular. It's not that easy at my place because my shower is quite small, but here, there's a lot more space, and this morning, he held me in his arms under the waterfall shower head, and gazed into my eyes as he took me.

"You feel so fucking good," he groaned, as I calmed from my second orgasm. I wasn't sure I'd ever get used to that feeling of fireworks sparking through my body, or seeing stars behind my eyes, or the way my body succumbed to his, but I still wanted more.

"I need your come, Tanner."

He sighed and stopped moving, settling me against the wall. "I don't think I can, babe." I was surprised and I guess it showed. "We've had a lot of sex since Sunday, and I'm kinda worn out."

"It doesn't show." I ground my hips onto his enormous cock, and he smiled.

"Getting hard is one thing. All I have to do is think about you and my cock aches to be inside you, but as for anything else…"

"Do you want to stop?" I asked.

"No. If you want to come again, I'm happy to carry on."

"We don't have to."

He lifted me off of him, lowering me to the floor, and captured my face between his hands. "Have I spoiled it for you?"

"Not at all. You're right. It's been a busy few days."

He smiled, resting his forehead against mine. "Can you believe so much has happened in such a brief space of time?"

"No."

He shook his head, leaning back and gazing into my eyes. "It's amazing. It feels like you've always been here… like I can't remember a time when you weren't a part of my life."

"I know. I feel exactly the same."

He shut off the water, grabbing us both a towel. I wrapped mine around myself, watching while he did the same, and we padded out of the bathroom and up the stairs to his bedroom.

I found my underwear in my bag, pulling it out, and turned to find him staring at me.

"Do you want to come to my place tonight?" I asked. "We can just sleep together, if you want. We don't have to do anything."

He walked up to me, taking my bra and panties from my hand and throwing them onto the bed.

"Yeah, we do. I'm sure I'll be fine by tonight."

"I'm sure you will, too. But I don't want you to feel we always have to make love. We don't."

"I know. But the thing is, Nash will be here tomorrow night…"

"Oh…" My heart sank. "So I won't be able to see you."

"Yes, you will. The whole point of telling him is so we don't have to spend any time apart."

"Then I don't see what the problem is."

"It's simple. If Nash is sleeping downstairs, we won't be able to have loud sex up here, or in the shower, or on the stairs, or in the kitchen."

"Oh. I see what you mean." I moved closer, letting my towel drop to the floor. "You're saying we need to make the most of tonight?"

"We do. Although I'm tempted to make the most of you right now."

"I thought you said you were worn out?"

"I was wrong."

I giggled, and he spun me around and threw me down on the bed, making me squeal with delight.

"Thank you for such a special morning," Tanner says, kissing me for about the fifth time. We're standing on his back doorstep, and I've been trying to leave for the last ten minutes. He pulls back, gazing into my eyes. "You're my world, Zara." I open my mouth to contradict him, to remind him of his son, but he puts his fingertip over my mouth, stopping me. "I know what you're going to say, and I haven't forgotten Nash. That would be impossible," he says, brushing his thumb along my lips, holding it at the corner, my face clasped in his hands. "But the thing is, without you, everything else would be dulled. None of it would mean as much as it does, knowing you're here."

I lean forward, and he twists his fingers through my hair, his hands resting on the back of my head as I nestle against his chest, my arms coming around his waist.

He holds me tight against him, and I listen to his heartbeat, relishing the strength of the man I love, although I have to pull away eventually, time getting the better of me. It's a workday, after all.

"I'll come over later, shall I?" he asks and I look up at him.

"Okay."

He kisses me again, then leans back. "You'd better go, or you'll be late."

We part reluctantly, holding hands until we can't any longer, and even as I walk away, he stands, staring at me. When I reach the end of the track, he disappears from sight, and I pick up my pace, rushing home to drop off my bag, and then practically running to work.

Everything's going so well, although I know it could come crumbling down tomorrow night when Nash finds out about us. I don't want to think about what Tanner might be forced to do if Nash isn't happy about me and his father being together.

Whatever he's just said, I know he'll choose his son. It's the right thing to do… but I can't bear the thought of a life without him, even though I've only known him for a few days. Like he said earlier, it's as though we've always been here… right where we are now. And I don't want that to change.

I arrive at school before the children, but only just, and I enter the teachers' lounge a little out of breath. Margot looks up, giving me a smile.

"I'm here before you for once."

"I overslept," I say, and she nods her head, waiting for me to stash my purse in my locker before we go out into the corridor and along to the classroom.

Alexander hasn't been in all week, and I'll admit there's a part of me hoping his mother will keep him off until after the weekend. I'm not in the mood for him today.

"I thought we could stay behind tonight and put some of the children's collages on the wall," Margot says, and I nod my head. There aren't that many, and it'll make the classroom look a lot less bare. Besides, Tanner won't be able to come over until at least six, so it'll kill some time.

Even though Alexander hasn't been in yet again, it's been a tough day. My limbs are aching and I'm glad to see the last of the children from the premises. I don't know why it's been so hard, other than my tiredness, I suppose, and I smile to myself as I return to the classroom, wondering if Tanner and I should take things easy tonight. Maybe we should cook something and watch a movie together… always assuming we can stay awake long enough to see it to its conclusion.

"The children's names are on the backs of the pictures," Margot says, laying them out on the tables, so we can see what we're doing. "But Miss Montgomery has a pet hate of us writing their names on the front when we display them. She prefers us to make little name tags for them, and I think there should be some paper already cut up somewhere…" She rifles through the drawers at the side of the classroom, as I sort through the collages, smiling when she lets out a triumphant cry. "That's one less job," she says, bringing over the neatly cut strips of paper.

"Shall I write while you stick?" I say and she smiles.

"Definitely. You've got much nicer handwriting."

I'm not sure that's true, but I'd rather sit and write out names than stretch around sticking things to the walls. My muscles could do with a break.

Margot gathers up some collages as I sit at my desk.

"This one will look best in the middle," she says, flipping it over. "It's by Ralph Hamilton."

I find a marker in my top drawer and print his name in capital letters, replacing the cap on the pen just as I hear a cough at the door. Both Margot and I turn to see Miss Montgomery standing there, her pale gray suit as immaculate as ever, and the white blouse beneath it buttoned up to the neck.

"Miss Howell?" she says, ignoring Margot and focusing on me.

"Yes?"

"Would you be kind enough to come to my office, please?"

"Now?"

"Yes. Now."

She doesn't wait for my answer, but turns, disappearing toward the front of the school, and I look up at Margot, who's poised, her mouth open, and the next picture in her hand.

"What's that about?"

"I've got no idea, but I suppose there's only one way to find out. Are you going to be all right for a minute?"

"I'll be fine. You'd better not keep her waiting."

She rolls her eyes and I smile, straightening my top as I hasten from the room and follow Miss Montgomery to her office. The door is closed, and I knock once, entering when she calls, "Come in."

As offices go, Miss Montgomery's is no different from any other, I suppose. It has one wall which is filled with bookshelves, and another that has a window overlooking the schoolyard. The other two walls have been used to display the many certificates and awards Miss Montgomery has attained during her no-doubt illustrious career, and I glance at them as I make my way to her wide desk, which is positioned a few feet away from the window.

"Take a seat," she says, nodding to the chair positioned on this side of the desk, and I perch on the edge, surprised by how nervous I feel.

"Is something wrong?" I ask.

She looks up at me, and then refers to a piece of paper in front of her, her lack of response doing nothing to calm my anxiety.

What on earth can I have done?

Miss Montgomery takes her time, clearing her throat before she raises her eyes to mine.

"I'm sure you appreciate that, in a small town like this, the reputation of the school and its staff is of paramount importance," she says, resting her hands on the desk in front of her.

"I'd have thought that was the case, whether the town was small or large." I'm surprised by how strong my voice sounds, considering my stomach is turning somersaults.

"Yes. But in a small town, there's nowhere to hide, and we have to be whiter than white."

"Are you saying I'm not?"

"I'm saying that's why I'm so disappointed in you."

"What for?" I ask, and she tilts her head and sighs.

"I understand you're romantically involved with Tanner Pope."

My stomach stops churning, my blood boiling in an instant. I'd assumed this was about my teaching, or a student… not my private life. And I don't welcome the intrusion

"I am, but I don't see…"

"He's the parent of a current student, Miss Howell," she says, like her meaning should have been obvious.

"A student who isn't in my class. And that being the case, I—"

Miss Montgomery holds up her hands. "I'm not sure that's relevant when our staff become the subject of gossip, and schoolyard tittle tattle."

"I wasn't aware I was, but I'm guessing your information comes from Mrs. Pope?" I can't see who else could have told her, and the timing fits perfectly with Tanner's visit to Sabrina just a few days ago.

Miss Montgomery stares at me, then swallows and looks down at the piece of paper in front of her, turning it over, so I can't read it… not that I've tried. "It doesn't matter where it came from. The point is, there's been a complaint and now I have to ask if you're prepared to put an end to this relationship?"

"You want me to stop seeing Tanner? I mean, Mr. Pope?" She nods her head, and I shake mine.

"Should I take that as a ‘no'?" she asks.

"You should."

Her shoulders drop. "In that case, I'm afraid I can't see a future for you here."

"You're firing me?" I say, in a state of shock.

"I've been placed in an impossible position."

"And the only way out of it is to let me go?"

"If you're not willing to see sense, then I'm afraid so. I'll have to ask you to pack your things and leave."

"Immediately?"

"Yes."

I stand. "What about my students?"

"I'll take your classes until we can find a replacement. It's not ideal, but…"

"No, it's not. But I see you've got everything worked out already. Thanks for the support."

I'm still angry, but I'm also devastated. How can she do this? My hands are shaking, and I turn, stumbling out of her office before she sees how much she got to me.

I wonder if I should go back to the classroom and tell Margot what's happened… except I'm too upset, and I'm not sure it's my responsibility. Besides, I don't want to stay here any longer than I have to, so I make my way to the teachers' lounge, grateful to find it empty, and I gather my things together. Luckily I don't have much here, but it's enough to fill a small bag and now I'm alone, I let the tears fall freely down my cheeks. I feel so humiliated, so unappreciated, and so damn angry. At the moment humiliation is winning, and I stutter out a breath, just as the door opens and Russ comes in.

"What's wrong?" he asks, coming straight over to me.

"Nothing."

"Don't bullshit me. Why are you packing your things?"

"Because I've been fired."

"You're kidding."

"Do I look like I'm kidding?"

I slam the locker door and turn to face him, even though he's a little blurred around the edges.

"Why have you been fired?" he asks, standing in the way, so I can't get to the door.

"Because of Tanner. Because I'm seeing Tanner. Someone told Miss Montgomery about us."

"It wasn't me," he says.

"I know, but the thing is, she didn't like it. She gave me a choice. Either stop seeing him… or else." He opens his mouth to speak, but I hold up my hand. "Don't you dare say I told you so."

"I wasn't going to, but Miss Montgomery can't fire you for this."

"She already has."

"You could fight it."

"And stay where I'm not wanted? I don't think so."

He shakes his head. "I'm sorry, Zara."

"So am I."

He steps aside at last, and I head for the door, turning as I open it. "Good luck," he says.

"Thanks."

The corridor is mercifully silent, although I can hear voices in the background, and I wonder if Miss Montgomery is informing Margot of the change in personnel. I enjoyed working with Margot, but I'm sure I'll be replaced in no time at all, and forgotten a lot sooner.

I wish I'd had the chance to say goodbye to the children, though, and as I leave the building and cross the schoolyard, I wonder how they'll react in the morning when I'm not here to greet them. We were all new to this, and I felt like we shared a bond, even if we didn't. Still… they'll get over it. Probably a lot sooner than I will. They have parents to support them, and for a moment, I wonder about calling my mom. I could do with a little support myself, but then I remember she's at Aunt Charlotte's and no doubt has her hands full. It would be unfair of me to add to her problems.

I walk down Mulberry Lane, dragging my heels until I get to the corner. I can see Tanner's bookstore from here, and I pull out my phone, looking him up in my contacts list. He'll probably be busy at this time of day, but he might be able to come over for ten minutes, just to give me a hug and dry my tears. My finger is hovering over the green icon when reality suddenly dawns.

I can't call him.

I can't see him.

I can't stay in Hart's Creek, either.

Aside from not having a job anymore, I have to ask myself the question… if Sabrina was willing to go so such lengths to split us up, what else might she do? Would she consider something that involved Nash? Might she try to cause trouble between him and his father?

The thought makes me shudder, and I put away my phone and cross the street, picking up the pace, knowing I can't come between Tanner and his son.

I can't do that to either of them.

I'm practically running by the time I get home, and I slam the door behind me, catching my breath. There's no time to lose, and I drop my purse and bag onto the floor, going straight into my bedroom, where I find my suitcases at the bottom of the closet, and throw my clothes into them. I'm not being even remotely careful about this, but what does it matter? I just need to get it done and get out of here.

It's amazing how quickly you can pack when you have to, and within minutes, my cases are full. I close them up and drag them out of the bedroom, leaving them by the front door, next to the overnight bag I brought back from Tanner's this morning.

There's so much still to do, and I guess the first thing I need is boxes. With a deep sigh, I go back outside, rushing straight to the garage. The door is stiff, but I get it open after a couple of tugs, and pull out the boxes I only flattened a few days ago, carrying them into the house.

"Where did I put the tape?" I mutter, glancing around the living room, then going into the kitchen. The prospect of re-packing everything is almost too much for me, and I pause, taking a breath. It's got to be done, and when it is, I'll call my mom and tell her what's happened and that I'm coming home. I know she's not there, but she won't mind if I let myself in and… and what? I've got no idea what I'm going to do. There's precious little chance of me finding another job in teaching after what's happened. And more than that, my life is here now… or it was. "Oh, God…" I sob, resting my elbows on the breakfast bar, trying not to think about what it felt like on Sunday night, when Tanner and I stood here, my ankle resting up on his shoulder, his… "Stop it." Memories like that won't help, and I suddenly remember where I left the packing tape. It's in the bottom drawer behind me, and I spin around, finding it buried beneath some hand towels.

Repacking all the books is such a daunting prospect, and I grab the first of the boxes, opening it out. It won't stay square, and I try to hold it steady between my legs, even though it keeps collapsing. Tears are streaming down my cheeks by the time I find the end of the tape and finally get the box reconstructed, and I stand up straight, grabbing the first few books from the shelf on the right.

I yelp in surprise when the doorbell rings and check the clock on the microwave. It's not even four-thirty yet, so I know it won't be Tanner. It might be Margot, I guess. Miss Montgomery has probably told her what's happened, and although I've got a lot to do, it seems unfair not to speak to her. I kick the box to one side and wipe away my tears with the back of my hand. Then I run to the door and pull it open, gasping when I see a distraught Tanner standing in front of me.

He can't have heard already, can he?