CHAPTER TWENTY

IWATCHTHE flush cover her face. She doesn't feel it, does she? Deserving. Given her parents' abandonment and selfishness, maybe that's not surprising. But she's spent years making her own way, caring for her sister without any help...she should feel proud of all that. Surely she's proved her worth to herself?

I really want her to have some fun and I've seen her in my pool throughout the week. It seems that, like me, she loves the water.

‘What else can we add to the list?' I ask as I reach for a glass of fresh orange juice to ease the dryness of my throat. ‘Stand-up paddle boarding in Croatia? Jet-skiing in Dubai?' I warm to my theme. ‘Snorkelling in the Caymans? Water-skiing in—'

‘I have been water-skiing,' she interrupts. ‘Once.'

I'm instantly curious and lean close.

She reads my expression and laughs a little bitterly. ‘It wasn't a good idea.'

‘No? Why not?'

She presses her lips firmly together.

After a moment she sighs. ‘I went with a girl from school,' she mutters. ‘I thought I'd made an actual friend. She was wildly different from me—happily married parents, money, popular, pretty...perfect...'

‘No such thing as perfect,' I mutter when she pauses too long.

‘No.' She draws a big breath in. ‘It was a day trip with her family. I thought it went okay. But it turned out my mother was having an affair with her father and when it came out the very next day she marched up to me at the cafeteria at school in front of everyone and said she'd only invited me because she "felt sorry for me". That I was her act of charity for the week because my clothes were ugly and I didn't belong there and everyone had been laughing at me for weeks. They all sure laughed at me then.'

I know how words can hurt and when they're thrown out in public they can hurt even more. And even if Talia rationalised this as merely retaliation from another hurt girl, it still stung. Shame still clung. I know it—I know that very particular burn.

‘I was happy to leave town that time,' she adds. ‘But that was the last time Ava and I did.'

‘You stayed put in the next place until Ava went away to university.' I watch her. ‘Why didn't you move with her then?'

She pauses. ‘I wanted her to be free to focus on her study and not feel guilty about me.'

‘Guilty?' I frown.

‘She struggled with me working long hours for not much pay. It was better for her not to have to see that. Plus I could earn more in Queenstown—and there was a lot of work available there.'

‘Enabling you to work three jobs at once.'

‘Right.' She picks up the other glass of orange and takes a deep sip before shooting me a look over the crystal rim. ‘Why are we talking about me again?'

I shrug innocently. ‘I'm curious.'

‘Well, I'm curious about you too,' she says softly.

I don't want to push her away. Her interest in me is a pleasure—I know it's not that she wants to pry. It's different. Given I want to know everything about her, it's actually a kind of relief that she obviously feels the same about me. Not just curious. Not just interested. Fascinated.

That night when she was upset thinking I'd thrown out Lukas's rabbit she eventually explained about having no things as a kid herself. I felt pleased that she told me. That she trusted me enough to tell me something painful and personal. She's just done it again now.

And again I'm honoured. It's a precious thing.

I needed to clear my own head after last night. Feeling the wind in my hair and the freedom on the water is my favourite way of doing that. I wanted to share it with her. But now I want to share more.

‘I first sailed with my grandfather,' I mutter awkwardly. ‘He taught me.'

Her expression softens. ‘He taught you lots of things?'

‘Yeah.' I put down my glass. ‘Took me up in a small plane when I was only ten.'

‘Is that even legal?' She shakes her head but laughs softly. ‘Sounds like you were lucky to have him. And he was lucky to have you.'

I go tense inside.

‘I'm sorry he didn't give you the chance to say goodbye to him,' she adds.

I glance at her sharply. But, of course, she'd been through something similar many times—with places, other people.

‘It hurts,' she says. ‘Even though he was trying to protect you, it hurts.'

I can't answer.

‘And he didn't give you time to prepare.'

‘Yeah.' I breathe out slowly. Not for the loss. I was so isolated and then his death was such a shock. ‘It sucked.'

I take her glass and set it on the table beside mine. She's right. Having time to prepare for tough things is important.

‘Phase one is complete.' I cup her face. ‘Phase two is scheduled for tonight.'

Her gaze smoulders at my touch. ‘What are you talking about?'

‘Your introduction to my world.' I brace.

‘Oh.' She grimaces slightly. ‘What's phase two?'

‘One of my famous parties.' I smile.

‘Tonight?'Her eyes widen.

‘Anzelotti Holdings is the primary sponsor of a new staging of one of Shakespeare's plays at the King's Theatre in town.'

‘Okay...' She looks unsure. ‘I thought you said party?'

I suspect she's never been to the theatre before. ‘Beforehand, yes.'

‘Before? So it's not going to be a wildly late night?'

‘No, we're talking a pre-show function at a bar down from the theatre.'

‘Not a debauched party at your place?'

‘No.' I'm not ready to have anyone else at home yet. ‘Time limited, guest-list limited. Risk limited.'

‘Top-tier control freak right there,' she mutters.

‘There'll be plenty of people watching. And there might be cameras.'

‘You hate those.' She wrinkles her nose. ‘Are you sure I need to be there?'

Yeah, I think it's important that we get on with her introduction to life here. To my life. ‘You have to meet everyone some time. You have something to wear?'

Her gaze narrows. ‘I'll figure something out.'

She doesn't want to ask me for help—that damn pride of hers again. I know she has a thing about things and about not holding onto stuff. She doesn't want to need anything from anyone. I fight to suppress the urge to challenge her on it now.

‘Party.' She huffs a breath. ‘Theatre. You take me out sailing, make me all warm and relaxed and now you're trying to kill my calm?' She pouts at me.

Yeah, an experience is different. An experience is something she can take from me.

‘Oh, I apologise.' I lean close. ‘But as it happens I know another way to make you all warm and relaxed again.'

I know our physical intimacy is only going to be temporary, but I don't yet have the strength to resist the power of it.

To resist her.