28. Conner

28

Conner

I glance at Knox as he sits next to Summer. She asked me to come by today because she wanted to be open and honest with Knox about our past and what happened with my brother. The whole situation is messed up, and she wanted me here just to help her get the truth out. She's in love with Knox and is terrified the truth will send him running.

After she tells him everything and has given him time to absorb and digest, Knox glances at me, his face tight, but his eyes are full of understanding.

"We okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, man, of course. We're okay."

From the bedroom I hear my sweet nephew playing and it makes me happy and sad. I'm looking forward to getting to know him better, and so are my parents. But the little boy also reminds me of Dani and our failed attempts at getting pregnant. When she told me she never wanted to see me again, it broke my heart into a million pieces, and I stepped back, wanting to give her the space she desired. I needed time to figure out what it was I had to do, too.

I know I haven't been honest with her, and I still don't know what to do about the whole situation. After I opened up to my parents and told them everything, they assured me that my brother's death was not my fault, and that no one, including Dani, would hold me responsible. I'm really hoping that is true, because while I respected her wishes to stay away, I have no intention of staying away forever. No, I have a plan in place, and today, right after I get the call I've been waiting for, I plan to put it into motion.

"Are we okay?" Summer asks Knox tentatively as she twists a long, stuffed snake—one of Tyler's toys—in her hands.

He nods. "The past is the past, Summer. You made mistakes. Hell, we all have. But you're trying to right them now, and that's all that matters."

She throws her arms around him and tears fill her eyes as he hugs her back. I push to my feet. "Okay, I have to run, and I'm sure you two have more talking to do."

Summer jumps up. "You need to go find Dani."

I pull my phone from my pocket. "I plan to. There's a call I've been waiting for before I do, though." The second I see that I have a text and a call from Dani, my throat tightens, and there's not a damn thing I can do to pinch back the tears in my eyes. "She called," I say quietly, my voice shaky as hope fills my heart. The love I feel for this woman washes over me and makes standing a chore.

"That's a good sign, Conner." Summer puts her arms around me. "You two belong together. You always have." She glances back at Knox. "I want us all to be friends."

Tyler comes running into the room and I bend and smile at him. "Not friends," I clarify. "Family." I ruffle Tyler's hair. She nods in agreement and chokes back tears.

"Go do what you need to do, Wood," Knox pipes in, giving me a slap on the back. "The past is the past and it's time to go get the future you deserve."

I nod, even though I still don't know how to tell Dani about Tyler. But it's the lies that got us into this mess, and I'm sick of deceit, sick of my brother's hate, and goddammit, he's taken enough from us as it is, and I refuse to let him continue taking, especially when he's no longer with us. Summer was right. Dani and I belong together. We always have.

Just then the call I've been waiting on comes in and my heart jumps into my throat. "Okay, I have to go."

I see myself out, and hurry to my car. I drive out to the country and hours later, with a very special package on the seat beside me, I head straight to Dani's house. I hope she'll talk to me. I guess the fact that she called means she's open to having a conversation. She's no doubt wondering why I haven't called or texted back, but what I'm about to do needs to be done in person.

Relief rushes through me when I see her car and bus in her driveway. I pick up the bundle beside me, and get everything in place before I exit the car. Hurrying up her driveway, being careful with the precious package in my hands, I reach her door, and set the little bundle on the stoop beside me.

I ring the bell and glance down, shifting restlessly as the door unlocks and swings open. My entire being fills with love as I take in the woman who holds my heart in her palm. Though I also note the dark circles under her eyes. Dani doesn't look like she's been sleeping too well either.

"Conner," she whispers, sounding breathless. Her gaze drops to the ground, to the fluffy Newfoundland pup with a specially made barrel tied around his neck. In the past, Newfoundland dogs were used for rescue missions, and even though this is a rescue mission—of our relationship—the barrel is not filled with whiskey. "Conner, what…what have you done?" She shakes her head, tears in her eyes. "Ohmigod, he's beautiful." She bends to pet him. "What is going on?"

"Open the barrel." She glances up at me, uncertainty dancing in her dark eyes. "Just open it."

She opens the little buckle latch, and the barrel opens to expose a bunch of pregnancy tests. She takes them out, and stares up at me. "What are these for?"

"I want to make a baby with you," I explain quickly. "I want us to be a family. I want a future with you, and our new dog, who has yet to be named." She continues to blink up at me and I hurry on. "I know you said you wanted to get a pup when you got pregnant, but don't worry, I'm determined to make that happen very soon, too. If…if it's still what you want."

She stares at me for a second, like she's trying to wrap her brain around that, when the pup gives her a big lick on the lips. She chuckles, picks him up and wipes her face. He snuggles right in with her, and the warmth in her eyes tells me it's love at first sight, for both of them. I get it, little doggy. Trust me, I get it.

Hugging the puppy, she steps into the house, and I say, "I'll be right back." I run to the car and grab the supplies and big, comfy doggy bed. I come back and stand on the steps.

"Can I come in?" She nods. "Good because we really need to talk."

"I know." She blinks rapidly. "I called and texted you. But then I saw your car…" Her words fall off, and my blood drains.

"You saw me at Summer's today?" She nods and inches back to let me in. "It's not what you think."

"That's not the first time you've said that, Conner." The door clicks shut and she follows me into the living room. I set the dog bed down and when the pup yawns, she places him in the middle of the bed. I don't sit—I'm too antsy—and neither does she.

I shift from one foot to the other, fear of hurting her making what I have to say so hard. "Summer wanted me there when she explained things to Knox." Confusion moves over her face and of course she's in the dark. She has no idea that Summer had an affair with Alec and the boy she saw me with is his. "I'll get to that, but you need to know that I'm not with Summer. I haven't been with her for a very long time."

"Okay."

Good, at least she believes that much. "It's you I love. It's you I've always loved." She remains quiet, her eyes sad as she continues to focus on me, clearly needing to hear more. "I thought I was responsible for Alec's death," I begin and her eyes go wide. "I held that pain close to my heart. I didn't want to hurt you because I always thought Alec was the love of your life, and you asked me for my DNA so it could help you keep a piece of Alec with you."

"That's not why I asked, Conner." I blink at her, and she continues. "I asked because I loved you. I've always loved you."

"I know…the letter."

"You found it in Alec's box." It's a statement not a question, and while I want to lie and protect her, there can be no more lies. My loyalties are with her, and if she loves me, and I know she does, my brother's indiscretion will hurt her, but I'm here now, here to help her put her life back together again.

"Yes."

"The boy…he's Alec's," she says again, and my head rears back. Holy shit, she knows…everything.

"Yes."

She nods, and her reaction isn't at all what I expected. Then again, I suspect she's been sitting with this knowledge for a while now.

"I didn't know about him until a little over a week ago," I explain.

"You knew about the affair?"

I exhale, my shoulders drooping and I hope she doesn't hate me for this but here I go. "I kept his secret to protect you. I was torn between loyalties, but now I know where my loyalties stand. With you. Always with you. I'd never do anything to hurt you, Dani. Not purposely. You have my word on that."

"I know that," she murmurs quietly, her voice low and shaky.

"There's something else you need to know. Something that I've kept close to my heart for a long time."

She swallows, her eyes moving over my face cautiously. "We need honesty, Conner."

"You're right." I run my hand through my hair, hoping she doesn't hate me.

She comes closer, and puts her hands on my shoulders. "Now tell me why you thought you were responsible for Alec's death?" she asks, knowing exactly what I wanted to talk about. My God, this woman might know me better than I know myself.

"The day…" I stop when I'm about to choke on my words. "The day you lost your baby…That was the day Alec was with Summer." I pause to let her absorb that. When I finally get a nod, I continue. "As you know, he called me and asked me to take you to the clinic. I knew he was with someone. I didn't know it was Summer. After…you lost…the baby. I called him and told him to get home. I was so fucking angry, Dani." I hold her gaze, as her eyes water. "I told him if he didn't come home right now, he was dead to me."

She slides her arms around me, and I pull her close. We hold onto one another like our lives depend on it. Her touch comforts me, gives me the strength to continue. "I'm superstitious and I believe in karma. I figured I was responsible for his death. I was terrified to say anything. I didn't want you to hate me."

She inches back to see me. "I could never hate you, Conner. I can be mad, or upset, but never hate. I don't have hate in me."

"I know you don't, and it's one of the many things I love about you." Her smile is soft and shaky. "Yeah, so karma. That day…the baby, and then Alec. I spent years waiting for the next ball to drop. I was so terrified it would have something to do with us."

"Losing each other," she whispers quietly.

"Yeah, and we did just that." My aching heart pounds a little harder. "Because of lies and secrets."

"You didn't want to hurt me." She lightly rubs my arms. "I understand that."

"The worst thing that could have ever happened to me was losing you, and then that happened. I was at rock bottom, karma hitting me in the face. Then my parents assured me Alec's death was not my fault, and that I was a good person."

"You're the best person I know."

"When you told me never to call again…" She cringes, and I brush her hair back. "Hey, I get it." I snort out a laugh. "It was then that I'd lost everything, and that's when I knew I had to fight…I had to try. What else could I lose?" She weaves her fingers through mine. "I knew I had the fight of my life on my hands, because I was not letting anyone take anything else away from me…from us."

"No one is ever going to do that again. My whole heart belongs to you." A whimpering sound comes from the doggy bed, and I turn to see the pup having puppy dreams. Dani grins at our new family member. "Well, maybe a small piece of my heart belongs to him now, too."

"And when we have a baby, we'll be sharing our heart even more." I bend and press my lips to hers. "You're going to be a great mom, Dani."

Her eyes fill with tears. "Do you think?—"

"Yes, I think," I say, cutting her off, and her worries that she can't get pregnant. "Actually, I know." I brush my thumb over her damp cheek.

Hope fills her eyes. "Yeah?"

"Yeah, I also think—know—that we should go to your bedroom, and start trying again."

She bites her bottom lip, worry in her eyes. "I lost track of my ovulation schedule."

I inch back. "Oh, well then," I tease playfully, my heart so full of love that we haven't lost each other, I'm sure it's going to burst. "If you're not sure if you're ovulating, there's no sense in?—"

She whacks me, a huge laugh bubbling up in her throat. "Practice makes perfect, Conner."

I let my head fall forward. "Ah, so it's just my wood you want," I tease.

"Well, I'm not going to lie about that."

"No more secrets," I promise, and she nods in agreement. "But before I give you wood , first this." I drop to one knee, and her hands go to her mouth.

"Conner…"

"Je t'aime. Veux-tu m'épouser?" I speak to her in French because I want her to know I've never given up on us, or our secret shared language and what it represents to her, and our future. "And a honeymoon in Paris, if you'd like."

She sniffs, and nods. "I love you too. Yes, I'll marry you, and I'd love to honeymoon in Paris. Now put that ring on my finger, take me into the bedroom and start making good on your promise."

I put the ring on her finger and scoop her up, ready to turn our brand new, small family of three into…four, and hopefully more.