14. Brighton

Ifell back into a very deep sleep after Noah and I found creative ways to use the whipped cream. Fortunately, the early morning seagulls pulled me awake as they do most mornings, and I woke before Camryn was up. That she or her father aren't early risers helped me make my escape.

I did a quick tidy of his bedroom, disposing the canister in the garbage can in my kitchen, so Jellybean didn't ask a million questions as to why her father was eating whipped cream in bed. But as I think about that now, staring out at the ocean below, a strange new sense of peace fills my soul. Maybe this down time has been good for me. Or maybe it's all the sex that's filling me with a new kind of contentment. I can't remember the last time I had so many endorphins racing through my well used body.

I turn and hug myself. I suppose I should check on Noah and Camryn, and see if I can make them some breakfast. Honestly, I love having someone to cook for. I always preferred homemade meals over store bought, but Dad usually just ordered in from the restaurant. I actually miss the days on the farm when we'd all sit down to a family Sunday dinner. I was little then, and I was happy. Even Mom used to come to the farm and she seemed happy enough. I guess there was more going on beneath the surface. More than a child could see, anyway.

Giving them a little more time to sleep, I walk around my place, which seems awfully quiet without little footsteps running around the place. Jeez, have I grown accustomed to having Camryn around that fast? Maybe I have. I do an email check, but my inbox isn't what it used to be and in the past, I thrived on meeting demands. Now, however, I kind of like not being pulled into a million different directions.

I walk into the hallway separating our wings and stand there for a second, listening for sounds on the other side of Noah's door. Should I just leave the two of them alone? Am I being ridiculously needy? Just because we're having sex and I'm caring for his daughter doesn't mean he wants me around all the time. He never said anything about the three of us having breakfast together.

This is ridiculous. I turn to go back to my wing, but stop abruptly when Noah's door swings wide open and I can't help but smile when I see sweet little Jellybean standing there in her twisted up nightgown.

"Ms. Brighton, I was just coming to get you," she yells at the top of her lungs.

"Inside voice, Bean."

I shift to see past her shoulders, having heard Noah, but don't see him. "Why were you coming to get me?"

"For breakfast. Dad said to tell you he's making pancakes, from flour," she emphasizes. "And we have whipped cream."

"He told you to tell me he had whipped cream."

Before she can answer, Noah steps up to the door, looking warm, sexy and satiated and my entire body responds, and when I mean my entire body, yes, I'm talking about the pumping organ just to the left side of my chest. Dammit and damn him for the sexy grin he's aiming my way.

"Yeah, I did," he responds.

"Ms. Brighton, I want you to make my pancakes."

"Hey," Noah shoots back, feigning hurt as he puts his hand over his heart. "What's wrong with my pancakes?"

"Daddy, please…" With that, she runs off and Noah shakes his head.

"You know you're going to be in trouble in about…oh, eight years."

"You mean I'm not in trouble now?" We both laugh at that. "Are you coming in?"

"I just wasn't sure…"

"Come on," he says, making this much less awkward than I am and I follow him inside and shut the door behind us.

"How about we make them together?" I suggest.

"I was informed she doesn't want lumps and if I'm making them from scratch, I could definitely use your help."

I slow my steps. "No lumps?"

He runs an agitated hand through his hair. "Her wish came true."

"Did you talk to her?"

"I did, actually. I explained that you'd always be in her life but she wouldn't be calling you mommy."

I put my hand on his arm. "Was she upset?"

"Not at all." I stiffen, seriously surprised by that. Noah shrugs, clearly baffled too. "She brushed me off, actually. She says daddies don't know everything." He glances over his shoulder, but Camryn ran to her bedroom and can't overhear us. He leans in. "Should I talk to her again?"

"Why don't we leave it. I think with time, it will pass, and who knows, you could meet someone and become serious really quick and that will change everything for her."

He frowns and nods. "Yeah, I guess."

I put my hand on his face, and since we're already going down this road, I ask, "Why are you still single, anyway?"

"You know why," is all he answers, and turns. "Come on, let's get to work on breakfast."

I stare at his back, his words like a slap. Do I know why? Is it because he has to put all his focus on Camryn? Is it because he's still in love with Shayla? Is it a combination of the two or is it something else entirely? I'd like to ask, but his quick dismissal has me zipping my lips shut.

I follow him into the kitchen, and he's quiet, reflective as I walk to the window and lift my face to the early morning sun.

"It's going to be a nice day."

"I take Camryn to the park on Sundays."

I turn to him and he still has his back to me as he puts a frying pan on the stove. "Right, you said something about that."

"I'd like it if you could come today. I know it's far from where we live now, but I think Camryn should still have familiar people in her life, especially her friend Becky. I understand if you can't go. You don't officially start your nanny job until I leave, but I think it would be good to get to know Gemma and Julie better. Julie wants Camryn to come to her place for playdates and you'd be the one taking her, and if you guys hit it off this time around, she could be a good friend."

"This time around?"

He reaches into the fridge for butter and I catch his glance. "We all went to high school together. We were all in different cliques."

"Gemma and Julie," I whisper, searching my memory banks. Our high school was pretty big, so it was hard to know everyone outside of my circle. That's when it hits me. I stiffen. "Are you talking about Gemma Strang and Julie Johnson?"

He pulls a spatula out of the drawer, and arches a brow. "You remember them?"

"Uh, yeah, vaguely." I push off the windowsill, a knot in my stomach. "Noah, I don't know if this is a good idea. We didn't get along all that well back in the day."

He nods, and wipes his hands on a dish towel. "It was a long time ago, Brighton. We're not hateful teens anymore. I'd like to think we've all moved past that."

Is he saying he's moved past that? That what is going on here isn't about revenge?

"You know what," he says before I can string a sentence together. "You're right. You don't have to go. I shouldn't have asked."

"No." I step up to him and put my hand on his back, giving it a small rub. "I want to go meet them. You're right, we're not cruel teenage girls anymore, right? Plus, this is important to Camryn and she's my main priority."

His smile is soft and sweet and pierces something deep in my heart. Dipping his head, he swipes his lips over mine, a soft, barely there kiss that curls around me and hugs tight, almost making me forget what we're doing here isn't for keeps.

"Thanks, Sunshine. I appreciate it, but honestly if you're not comfortable."

"Can we get ice cream afterward?" I ask, lightening things, even though I am worried about meeting up with Gemma and Julie. My friends weren't very nice to them. Which once again makes me hate myself for staying in that group and staying silent.

"Of course."

"Triple scoop?" I tease.

"Whatever you want, Sunshine." He gives my ass a whack. "Now let's get started on these pancakes. For some reason, I'm starving this morning."

I laugh and go to work on making the batter, teaching Noah how to do it for next time. By the time Camryn comes back into the kitchen, her no-lump pancakes are ready. We sit at the table like a small family of three and Camryn tells me about her friend Becky as we eat. After breakfast, we clean up, and I return to my wing for a shower. I dress in comfortable yoga pants and a t-shirt and thirty minutes later, we're all headed outside, ready to make our way to the park. Camryn is still talking, so excited to be seeing her friend.

"Do you think Becky could come swimming at the beach with us sometime?" she asks as she buckles herself into the back seat of Noah's car.

"If it's okay with her mom."

Camryn crinkles her nose and frowns. "I think her mom is mad, though."

"Oh, why is that?" I ask as I close her door and slide into the passenger seat, watching Noah as he circles the front of the vehicle.

"She wanted to be my mommy."

"Oh," I say, as Noah slides in beside me. "I didn't know that."

"Didn't know what?" Noah asks.

"That Becky's mom wanted to be Camryn's mommy."

He sucks in a breath through clenched teeth. "We're friends," he explains.

"Camryn is worried Becky won't be able to come play here because her mom is mad."

He adjusts the rearview mirror. "I'm sure she's not mad, Bean, and that Becky will be able to come swimming."

"Okay," she says cheerily and picks up her portable tablet.

I take in Noah's sharp angles as he backs out of the driveway and merges into traffic. He said I knew why he was single, but the truth is, I don't think I know the real reason.

"Something on your mind?" he asks, casting me a fast glance.

"Just thinking about my triple scoop ice cream," I tell him. He eyes me like he doesn't believe me and I just smile. What's really going through my mind is how much I like Noah, and how he can have any woman he wants, I'm sure. Yes, it's true, I did feel a tad—or a lot—jealous when Camryn said Becky's mom wanted to be her mommy.

His hands slides across the seat and he gives my thigh a squeeze. It curls through my body and instantly lets me know how easily I could fall for this guy.

You mean you haven't already, Brighton?

Oh boy.

Needing a distraction, I turn up the radio and sing to the songs as I push back in my seat, enjoying the drive. I can't remember the last time I didn't drive myself somewhere, and I have to say it's kind of nice just to sit back and let someone else take care of me. Noah has definitely taking charge since he bought the resort, and it's nice to know I can count on him in a way I've never been able to count on anyone.

Are you sure this is really about revenge?

Actually, no, I'm not sure. The more time I spend with him, the more I get to know him, I see there is something very special about this man. He has a good heart, and maybe, just maybe he bought the resort to help out his old boss's daughter, and maybe the resort holds fond memories for him too.

I sit up a bit straighter as we reach the downtown core of Boston, and Camryn is practically squirming in her seat, anxious to get out. Worry niggles in my stomach as Noah parks. As if sensing it, he unbuckles and checks in with me.

"You good?"

"Yes," I say and hope he's right, that we've all moved on from our younger years. On the sidewalk, I take Camryn's hand as she tries to dart to the lights. When the walk signal appears, she practically drags me across the street, Noah lagging behind us and snickering as I struggle to keep up with his feisty daughter.

"I see Becky. Becky, Becky," she calls out and many heads turn our way. "Oh, and there's Olivia."

We reach the park, and Noah says, "You can let her hand go. She's good to run from here." I do as he says and off she goes. That's when I spot Julie and Gemma chatting near the swings as we close the distance. They watch me carefully as we approach and I can't help but feel like a bug under a microscope.

"Julie, Gemma," Noah begins. "You both remember Brighton."

"Of course, we do," Gemma says with a smile that quickly turns into a frown. "I'm sorry to hear about the resort."

"Thank you. But thanks to Noah, it's going to stay open and running."

Julie's lips quirk. "The rumors are true then."

Noah nods. "Yes, the rumors are true. I bought the place."

"Uh huh," Julie mumbles almost under her breath, her quirked lips morphing into a smirk.

"Brighton is Camryn's new nanny," he announces.

"Oh, you went with nanny." Julie's head bobs in thought. "That's interesting."

I have no idea what she means by you went with nanny, but I do know why that's interesting to her. I'm a failure, unable to keep the resort running on my own, and she's probably wondering why Noah would want such a failure around his child. Does she think he had ulterior motives like I used to—buying the place to get revenge on me?

"She's great with kids." Noah's back stiffens as he defends me. "She'll be watching Camryn for this upcoming NHL season," he adds, which is not so nice, because it's a reminder that when the season is over, we're over and I could very well be out on my ass.

Julie hikes her bag over her shoulder. "Well, isn't that wonderful."

Camryn calls out to her father as she climbs the monkey bars. He glances at her, smiles and waves. When he looks back at Julie, he says, "I thought you guys might all hit it off, and then you can talk about those play dates you wanted to arrange."

"Oh yes. Play dates." Julie aims a sweet smile Noah's way before zeroing back in on me. Her smile widens. "We're going to be great friends."

She puts her arm through mine, and as she leads me to the bench, my stomach sinks with the awful feeling that she might know something I don't, and what she knows, I'm not going to like.