Thirty-Two

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TOBY

I'm once again nervous.There aren't many things that make me nervous. I'm very comfortable with who I am and that lends me a lot of confidence in myself in most situations.

However, I'm meeting Atty's family. Under any circumstances, that would be a slightly anxious situation. But there's a lot about this particular meeting that could make everything go oh so very wrong. Something tells me that his sexuality isn't going to be the biggest upset today. Not even that he's bringing a guy with him as his date—his for real boyfriend.

It's the fact that he isn't marrying Marie.

He's marrying me!

The thought has been loud in my head for days now. I think ever since we talked about where this is going, it's been a whisper. But since talking about this wedding, it's been a roar.

It's skipping like eight steps; not least of all is finally telling Atty I love him. It's a big moment for me. I've never said the words out loud to anyone. Well, Jayse, but that's a very different kind of love.

We're staying in a hotel just outside of the town where his cousin is getting married. Thankfully, this isn't a cousin who still lives in Greece. Or maybe that's unfortunate. I haven't been to Greece before. Then again, I also don't have a passport and that would have put a damper on me attending with him.

In fact, it's incredibly fortunate that his cousin isn't getting married in Canada. This cousin lives just over the border in Washington. We took a train from L.A. to the northernmost station and then rented a vehicle.

Atty decided we weren't going to be staying on the property where his family would be. It's an enormous estate and breathtaking based on the pictures we looked at online. But Atty wanted a place separate from his family where we could escape to.

If things go south.

Thankfully, he called his cousin and explained the situation beforehand. It was difficult for him. The way it made my heart expand for this man when he wanted me there and to be cuddled up in my arms as he talked to his cousin made me fall for him that much more.

It was a big step for him. This wasn't his parents he told, but she was still family. Thankfully, she took it well and loudly demanded that he come with your darling boyfriend. Yes, I heard those words. She was nearly screeching.

My grin was huge. And I was so fucking proud of him for taking that step. The weight that lifted from his shoulders when he did said a lot about how stressed this event is making him.

We're now driving to the venue. We'll be arriving late. Not late enough that we'll miss anything, but late enough that we'll miss mingling. Just enough time to get in and take a seat before it starts. He's supposed to text his cousin as soon as we park.

I slide my hand into his. Atty glances at me and smiles. "I'm good," he promises. "I'm just going to be nervous until the reception and the inevitable confrontation happens."

"Do you anticipate we'll be leaving shortly after?" Which is my way of asking, if he expects it to get ugly.

Atty doesn't answer for some time. Finally, he blows out a breath, puffing his cheeks. He's just gotten his hair cut again. I can still grip it, but it's no longer long enough to tie up. He's clean-shaven, too. There's a chance that no one here will recognize him. For his sake, I almost hope for that outcome.

But maybe not. Then this will continue to hang over his head.

There's little chance that he won't be recognized, though. Since the event in the park, his ‘new image' has been the highlight of all sports and entertainment news reels. Funnily enough, there's still debate that's really him or not.

"No," he says eventually. "I think that my mother is going to have a quiet tantrum, but ultimately, she's going to pretend this isn't real and continue to push for me and Marie."

I scowl, turning it to the window to try to hide it. His hand grips my thigh and I look at him.

"It doesn't matter what they want, Toby. This is what I want."

There's a very real chance I'm going to tell him I love him before this day is through. I can feel it bubbling up.

We pull in and park close to the exit. In a spot where there's no way we'll be blocked in.

As soon as the engine is off, Atty texts his cousin. We receive a response immediately.

[Anabeth Atlas] Thank god! Just sit for a minute. I'll tell you when to come in. We're going to get everyone seated and then right before the kids are ready to rain petals, you come in. Okay?

Atty nods and responds with a yes. Then we wait. Waiting is probably more stressful on our anxiety than facing it, though. Texts from his mother and Marie's mother started an hour ago, asking where he was. Why wasn't he there yet? Marie is waiting.

When I read that specific text, I find I'm questioning how genuine Marie truly is in agreeing that they're not as compatible as everyone wants them to be. Sure, I heard her words, but did she come to this thing alone? Knowing what their families would think and how they'd act?

Thankfully, we don't have to wait long.

As much as we'd like to dawdle as we did when heading into Noah's, I think we're both very aware that Anabeth is practically shifting the timing of their wedding around Atty's comfort. It's really very kind of her.

With our hands tightly linked, we head for the venue. There's a giant hall made of wood and stone where the reception will be. The wedding ceremony is taking place in a small chapel around the side. It's a very picturesque setting. If there's time later, I'd love to just look around. Take some pictures. Maybe some with me and Atty.

Atty's hurried steps pause just outside the door. He takes a deep breath, meets my eyes, and together we nod. I think it's that single moment when we physically feel that we're doing this together. Despite what we're walking into, I smile because of it.

I'm not sure if I'm relieved or anxious when we walk in and everyone turns to us. It's a small crowd. Atty said the reception would be bigger, but the ceremony itself was limited to family and close friends. There are probably thirty or forty people here.

And all eyes are on us.

We have instructions on where to sit. About half way up on to the left as part of the bride's party. The eyes don't leave us, even when we sit.

Atty wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me flush against his side. From the way his breaths are shallow, I think the close contact is more about comfort than it is a statement to everyone else.

If I were to fall in love with a woman, I decide that it would be Anabeth Atlas. Within sixty seconds of us being seated, the music starts, and the men come out. She literally timed this exactly so we didn't have to talk to anyone at all before the reception. Yep, I'd definitely fall in love with this woman if I wasn't already in love with Atty. And was at all attracted to women, of course.

The ceremony is short, succinct, and sweet. There aren't any long, drawn-out hymns or prayers. It's just a loosely traditional ceremony with some personal touches here and there, an exchange of vows, and then the kiss.

Anabeth didn't look at Atty on her way in, but she offers us both a big smile on the way out. We're on our feet already as the wedding party follows behind and rush after them as soon as the aisle is clear.

Pictures are next, which means there's a lot of mingling about with cocktails and finger foods while the groom and wedding party do their thing. I'm thankful this isn't one of those big weddings where every single blood relative is required for pictures. That means no awkward moment for me standing off to the side as I wait.

Atty pulls me through the crowd. Other people arrived as the ceremony took place. Atty said the reception would have over a hundred people in attendance. I think his plan of attack for the night is to avoid everyone by getting lost in the crowd.

He remains tense and nervous, but we still chat with random people he knows from here and there. Atty introduces me as his boyfriend to everyone. With a big, beaming smile. I'm sure by the fourth time, I have hearts in my eyes.

Our luck carries on as the crowd is herded into the reception. There are assigned seats and we're not sitting with his family. Or Marie. As we're making our way to the table, Atty waves and leans in. "See the pretty blond?" I look up and see Marie. "That's Marie."

I look at him with amusement. "It's cute you think everyone whites her face out in the news when you two have been spotted together."

Atty looks at me blank faced and then laughs. "Right. Sorry."

He's a fucking gentleman and pulls my chair out for me before taking his seat at my side. He grips my hand under the table as our table begins to populate with other guests. I'm relieved when there's a couple we've already talked to.

The beginning of the reception is as one would expect. The wedding party is introduced. The couple is introduced. They head to their tables and we eat. Then we watch the first dance. Atty holds me close, his arms around me and his chin on my shoulder as we watch the newly married couple. I wonder if his stomach is fluttering like mine is. Is he also imagining us doing that?

Our luck runs out as soon as the crowd is released for dancing. His mother is suddenly there as if she hadn't been purposefully seated at the opposite side of the room.

"Hector!" she says and, for a moment, I think maybe Atty has it all wrong as she hugs him fiercely. "Look at you! If it weren't for the news, I wouldn't recognize my own son."

Atty chuckles. "Sorry, mom."

"Why did you shave, boy?" she asks, patting his cheek affectionately.

He shrugs. "It was time for a change as I moved into a new chapter of my life."

His mother pffts. I see Atty's shoulders tense as she studies him. "Nonsense, Hector. You don't need a new look for a new chapter. You were perfect the way you were."

"Is this your way of saying that you don't like my face without hair?" he asks. Though he's trying for teasing, I don't think anyone misses the tension in his voice.

"Not at all, darling. You're handsome with or without long hair. Just like your father." She rests a fond hand on his chest, smiling at Atty.

Once more, I think maybe Atty has it all wrong. But the time for those thoughts come to an end when she turns her attention to me. It's not quite hostile, but it's definitely not friendly.

Atty reaches for me. When his hand connects, he pulls me to his side, wrapping his arm around my waist. "This is my boyfriend, Toby," Atty introduces. The circle around us hushes. Another older couple joins us, and I don't need to be told who they are. Marie's parents, frowning at Atty severely.

His mother looks between us for a minute before studying me. "Toby," she repeats slowly.

I offer her a smile as I turn my body into Atty's and wrap both my arms around his waist. Am I possessive? Fuck yes. I'm keeping this man! Her eyes narrow. "Nice to meet you, Mrs. Atlas."

"No," the other woman declares. "Unacceptable. You didn't break up with my baby for a man."

"This is Marie's mother," Atty tells me, unnecessarily.

"Debbie, shh," Mrs. Atlas says. "My boy is going through a phase."

My shoulders tense, and it takes all my energy to bite my tongue.

"No," Atty says and my breath catches. "I didn't break up with Marie for a man. I didn't break up with Marie at all. We decided together that we didn't want to be together anymore. And no, mom, I'm not going through a phase. I'm bisexual. Toby is my boyfriend. No jokes. No experimenting. Not me being curious. He's my boyfriend. We're serious about our relationship."

I'm not sure whether I'm breathless with a wide smile from the words he's saying, or if it's because I'm so fucking proud of him for saying them.

Silence settles around us. I'm sure a bubble has formed and we're a completely separate party right now.

"Oh," Mrs. Atlas says, her eyes wide. "I… are you sure?"

Atty rolls his eyes. "I'm sure. You can support me or not, but I'm done hearing about Marie and the future you've planned that we never wanted. This is the life I'm choosing to live, Mom. I'm happy. I really hope you can be happy for me, too."

"Oh, Hector," she says. I can't tell if the tears in her eyes are sadness from her realizing how she's always made him feel, or for the future she planned for him no longer being a possibility.

Unfortunately, we don't learn which way it goes.

"No!" Marie's mom screeches. "No, no, no! This is unacceptable, Hector. You will be with my daughter as we've always planned. That's the only future for you! You will not be with this, this?—"

"Enough!" Atty snaps. I'm not sure if it's louder than I think it is, but the music quiets and everyone around us falls silent. Several jumped, as I did at the sudden, sharp tone. "You will not be disrespectful toward the man I love in any way. Quite frankly, I don't give a fucking shit what you want. You're a very nasty, pushy, scheming woman and I'm not at all upset to see you out of my life."

My heart is racing. I barely hear what he's saying because the words ringing in my head are on repeat. The man I love. Over and over again, that's all I hear.

He's still talking. I can hear the words, though they're foreign to me. The man I love. This is happening. My entire body breaks out in chills. He loves me, too!

I'm pulled from my thoughts as Atty guides me out of the group. I'm surprised when I find us on the dance floor instead of heading for the door.

"Are you okay?" Atty asks, concerned. Probably because I can't catch my breath. I just stare, dumbfounded. Sight a little blurry.

"You said you love me," I whisper.

There's an amused smile on his lips as he tilts his head. "Yeah… not the way I intended to tell you, but I guess… surprise?"

His nervousness makes me grin and I laugh. It's slightly hysterical. "I love you too, Atty."

Now his smile is wide. "I hope so," he murmurs, pulling my body flush to his. I wrap around him, pressing my lips to his and for the rest of the night, I have no idea what happens around us. The only thing I see or hear or remember is being with Atty. In the arms of the man that I love with my entire soul.