Chapter 12

CHAPTER TWELVE

BILLIE

T he next hour flew by in a whirlwind. I got ready as quickly as I could. On the way out, I looked at myself in my mirror and deemed my appearance suitable for an orkin date before rushing to the kitchens. I wanted to pack up food before anyone got there for the last meal and peppered me with questions. Anything that looked portable I grabbed and shoved into a basket, then dashed out to meet Steve. As I walked, I realized I still had a solid few minutes until sunset, so I slowed my pace and took a couple deep breaths. I didn't want to show up harried and panicked.

Yes, I was nervous. I'd spent the last several week getting to know Steve and consciously trying to keep my flirting in check. I didn't want to be the hit-it-and-quit-it girl anymore. I considered the other relationships I'd had—if it was even worth calling them that. They were long-term, no-strings hookups, always on the down-low. The guys I slept with always wanted me to be their secret sidepiece. They were there for my tits and ass, but I wasn't for taking home to mom.

Starting things with an actual date was a huge step. And the more I learned about Steve, the more I wanted to learn. His childhood hadn't been unhappy, but even though he didn't say it in the group, I could tell he resented that he was still treated like the kid brother. No one was ready to let Steve become a man. Or… orc? Steve loved to talk and I was ready to listen. We would very likely have a lovely time. Why was I so in my head about this date? Was I making the same mistake by keeping this—whatever we were—secret with Steve?

TWO YEARS EARLIER…

My phone buzzed in my back pocket. I knew who it was before I even pulled it out.

Eric: Wanna get out of here?

I didn't have to give up my prime real estate on the balcony, red solo cup in hand, to know Eric would be watching me from across the lawn. Subtlety was not his strong suit. Do I want to leave with Eric? I sighed. Everyone was at the point of being sloppy drunk, and I was still sober. I wasn't having any fun, so I might as well have a little bit of fun with Eric.

Billie: Sure.

Eric: Okay, I am going to head to my car, but wait a few minutes?

I rolled my eyes. He didn't want anyone to know we were hooking up. We all hung out in the same friend group and he said it would "make things weird." I knew what it meant. It's what all the guys meant. They wanted me for my body, for my curves, but they didn't want anyone to know that they wanted me. Billie, here with a great rack and ready for a good time. I watched Eric leave and headed over to Dre.

"Hey, I'm gonna head out," I said to my best friend of fifteen years.

"You sure?" She looked up at me from her boyfriend Nathan's lap. I knew an engagement ring was coming soon.

"Yeah, even though I'm twenty-four, Mom still gets pissed when I come home late. Rants about being on the road with drunk drivers."

"Okay, well, text me when you get home."

"Will do," I said, knowing I wouldn't.

I headed out to the front to find Eric leaning against my beat-up Honda Element. She was old and hand-me-down, but I loved her. And the seats in the back folded completely flat. I unlocked it and hopped into the driver's seat while Eric got into the passenger side.

"Where to?" I asked, knowing the answer.

"Oak Tree?"

"Yeah," I said and turned the car on, heading for the bowling alley.

We lived in such a small bedroom community that there weren't really any "bad" parts of town, but the bowling alley was a dive, and no one paid attention to cars parked there overnight. I pulled into the back of the lot and we both folded down the backseats without speaking. After a quick and fairly unsatisfying fuck in the backseat of my car, I dropped Eric off at his car. As I went to drive away, he called to me.

"Hey, where are you going to tell Dre you went?" he asked, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

I rolled my eyes. He was asking me if I was still okay with keeping it a secret. He didn't want Dre to know he was treating me as a side chick because she'd kick his ass on my behalf. As Eric studied me in concern, all the faces of the prior dudes who'd treated me like this popped up in my head. Suddenly, I felt gross.

"You know what. Fuck you. I'm done being just an easy lay for you. No. I won't tell Dre. But only because I am embarrassed that I let you treat me like less than a person for this long. You can use your own damn hand from now on."

With that, I sped off home, leaving Eric with his jaw hanging open like a dumbass fish.

I pulled myself back to the present. I hadn't thought about Eric in years. He was the last man I let use for my body. Was I setting myself up for the same treatment by wanting to keep Steve a secret?

No. Steve wasn't like that. He already told me he was drawn to me. He wanted me for all of me.

I hoped.

STEVE

Billie had brushed her lips across my cheek. I didn't even know what to call what she did. Did orkin do that? I pressed my hand to where her lips had been. They had been warm and soft. I wondered how the rest of her would feel. I quickly shook myself out of it and hurried off to get ready for our date . I wanted to shower and change my clothes, maybe even polish my boots. They'd taken a beating during our work.

I showed up to our agreed meeting place early and flustered. I was wearing my nicest clean clothes. I shuffled nervously with my hands clasped in front of me, unsure of what to do as I waited. What if she didn't show up? She'd wanted to keep this secret, which seemed logical, but what if she was embarrassed of me?

I felt the crushing weight of inexperience. I knew nothing of how to "woo" a female. My knowledge of sex and relationships all came from talk in the sauna with Reykr and the other guys. I didn't even know if she would expect something entirely different as a human. I shook myself. This was Billie. The woman who had spent the last several weeks making all of us laugh as we worked ourselves to the bone to see her dream come true. I was thinking about the way her face lit up as she got a laugh out of me when I saw her approaching, carrying a basket and a rolled-up blanket.

"Hi." She waved as she approached.

"Hi."

We just stood there smiling at each other like two idiots for a moment. I bit my lip. Somehow, calling this dating had made it feel very real.

"Do you know the way?" I asked finally.

"Yes. It isn't far." She tentatively linked her arm in mine so she could lead the way. At least she had some idea of what she was doing.

We headed out of the village on a path that took us into the Niflfyri, or Forest of Mists as the humans called it. The sun was still a sliver in the sky, but the shadows were lengthening, and everything was tinged with the blue of twilight. We walked silently and I tried to take in everything I could about Billie. This is the closest I'd ever been to her. Her hair was damp and smelled wonderful. It took significant willpower not to bend down and bury my face in her curls. They were amazing. She always had her hair pulled back when we were working, but by the end of the day ringlets were slipping out around her forehead and at the nape of her neck. I had thought more than once about dragging my tongue along her neck to taste her. I was even more enamored with all of her curls on wild display.

I wanted to say something, anything, to get the conversation going. For the first time, I found myself out of questions. She seemed happy walking arm-in-arm, but I realized she was still carrying the basket and the blanket.

"Here, let me take the supplies," I said, reaching across her and accidentally brushing my arm against her chest.

She looked startled but not displeased as I took the items off her. She didn't comment on my accidental invasion of her space but blushed as she handed me the basket and blanket.

"Thank you," she said. "Where did you tell the guys you were going tonight?"

"I didn't run into any of them. I figured I would let them think I was exhausted from my day with you."

"And how did I exhaust you?" she asked, arching a brow suggestively.

"I just meant—I mean…" I stammered.

"I'm just teasing you." She brushed her now free hand down my arm and looked up at me.

I felt like my skin was on fire. "We're gonna be okay," she said. "This is supposed to be fun. We already know we like spending time together. This is just taking it to the next level, right?"

I wasn't sure if she was reassuring herself or me—or both of us. I let out a slow breath.

"I really like talking to you," I said. "I don't see how talking to you more would be anything but enjoyable." I pulled her closer to me as she stumbled over one of the cobblestones.

"I like talking to you, too."

We walked in comfortable silence for a bit before Billie spoke again.

"Have you ever seen the glowing mushrooms before?" she asked.

"Not at night. I have seen them during the day, but they look like ordinary mushrooms then."

"I've never seen them at all. I haven't strayed from the village since we were dumped here. I didn't feel safe."

"Any reason?" I asked.

"Well, once you realize that being abducted by aliens is an actual viable option, you aren't keen on putting yourself in a position to be re-abducted. I felt safe within the confines of the village." Her face was scrunched as if she was admitting something embarrassing.

I'd never thought about having a fear of being abducted again . That would be terrible.

"But, now?" I asked.

"I trust you to keep me safe if any alien baddies show up," she said, batting her eyelashes adorably at me.

I puffed out my chest. "It would be an honor to protect you from alien baddies."

Billie just laughed and continued to pull me toward our destination. We reached the part of the path where the cobblestones turned into packed dirt, signifying the beginning of the forest and the end of Fyrifírar territory. It wasn't long before the mushrooms started to pop up like jewels along the path. It was almost dark, so the glowing mushrooms provided most of the light.

Billie approached them, squatting down to look more closely.

"These are like something you'd find in a 1970s blacklight poster," she said as she stroked a finger across the head of one of the mushrooms.

I squatted down next to her. "I'll have to take your word for it because I don't know what half of that means."

The mushrooms really did look magical, glowing all colors the rainbow and bathing the path in a soft light. I set down the basket and the blanket and walked to inspect another, larger patch of mushrooms. They were all over the planet, but seeing them up close was very different. As I investigated, Billie busied herself by laying out the blanket and basket for us. Wanting to get at least to sit with her before night truly fell, I left the mushrooms and joined her.

"What did you pack for us?" I asked, sitting down across from her.

"A little bit of everything, but mainly gautr, because I know it's your favorite," she said, giving me a smile.

Oh no. Was I going to have to pretend to enjoy gautr? Why would she think I liked it? I must have done a terrible job hiding my horror because she started laughing.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

"I think you and I might be the only ones in Fyrifírar that hate gautr. I noticed you always skip it at breakfast because I do, too!" She laughed.

Relieved, I started to laugh with her. I loved the way we laughed so easily together. Billie had an excellent sense of humor.

"It tastes like rotten fruit to me," I said. "I don't get it!"

"Rotten fruit is being generous. It smells like feet and has the texture of already chewed food." She made a gagging face and kept laughing.

What she'd actually brought were two of my favorite things: the meat pies the kitchen made and the sweet pastries they sometimes had at breakfast.

"How did you know these were my favorite?" I asked, grabbing a meat pie.

"You haven't been the only one paying attention," she said, taking a meat pie for herself.

"Is it that obvious that I've been watching you?" I asked. I didn't realize I'd been so obvious, but considering it landed me here on a picnic with Billie, I had no regrets.

"Only because I've been watching you right back." She bit her lip, looking up, blushing. One of her curls had fallen into her face as she'd arranged the food. I reached out a hand to tuck it behind her ear, and to my surprise, she leaned into the touch, leaving my palm cradling her cheek.

"Are you super hungry, or could we put off eating for a bit?" she asked, tracing a finger across my knee.

I swallowed. I knew nothing about physical intimacy, but I was ready for whatever Billie wanted.

"I can wait on food, but you'll have to lead the way."

"Oh, I can do that," She moved the basket of food that was between us and scooted closer to me until we were knee to knee, both sitting cross-legged.

She reached out and stroked a finger along my jaw.

"Do you know what kissing is?" she asked. "Piper said Agnarr didn't."

"I have seen Agnarr press his lips to Piper's the way you did to my cheek this afternoon," I said, growing hot all over at the feeling of her finger on my jaw.

"Would you like to try it? Are you okay with me being your first kiss?" She traced her finger down my neck, causing me to shiver.

Her voice was breathy in a way I hadn't heard before. Did this mean she was aroused?

"I—I am okay with that," I stuttered.

My heart was practically beating out of my chest. Not only did Billie want to kiss me, she was asking me if I was okay with it. I was definitely okay. I was so okay that I felt my pulse under every inch of my skin. She got up on her knees so we were at eye level and leaned in close.

"We're going to take it slow," she said, stroking her hand down my arm. "Tell me if I do anything you don't like or that makes you feel uncomfortable."

At this point, my skin was on fire with the sensation of her touch and the anticipation of whatever she was going to do—I didn't care what it was. She placed her hands on both my shoulders and made eye contact one last time before leaning in. She brushed her lips against mine gently, almost hesitantly. They were soft. So soft. I wasn't sure what to do with my mouth, so I remained still. She pressed her lips against mine again, this time more firmly, before slipping her tongue out and dragging it across my bottom lip. Suddenly, I needed more. Billie's lips on mine made me feel like it was just the two of us, learning each other, cherishing each other.