Chapter 17

SEVENTEEN

Maverick

The weather this week has been complete shit. I’ve been rained out three of the five days, today being the third. It worked out, though. Since Merrick was rained out, too, we’ve been moving him into his new place. He closed on the loan last night, so he and I have spent the day taking everything to his new place.

It’s a bittersweet day, but we knew we wouldn’t be living together forever. Besides, his place is really nice, and the previous owners had the house professionally cleaned so it was move-in ready. It worked out in his favor that we were both off today. We borrowed an enclosed trailer from Orrin that he uses to haul parts when he needs them. We got everything in one load. He bought new living room furniture, since everything we have was handed down.

“What about the kitchen? You can’t eat off nothing but paper plates, bro,” I tell him.

“I’ll just order what I need online. I hate shopping for that shit. Hell, I hate shopping. Period.”

“I’m sure any of our brothers’ wives would help you. I could ask Stella too.”

“Nah, I’ll figure it out. How is Stella?”

I shrug. “Good. She’s working today, or I would have roped her into helping us.” I laugh.

“I love you, Mav, but you’re lying to yourself, brother.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Stella. She’s not just your friend.”

“Yes, she is. Why is that so hard to believe?”

“Do I really need to dumb this down for you?” he asks, as if the mere thought of having to explain himself is exhausting.

“Yeah, I guess you do. Why do you and everyone else keep insisting we’re not just friends? Sterling and Alyssa were best friends for years.”

Merrick tosses his head back in laughter. “They’re married now and having a baby.”

“So, that doesn’t mean all male and female friendships turn out that way.” I truly don’t know why they don’t get it.

“You smile when you hear her name. When she walks into a room, your eyes light up like they did when we were kids and Santa brought you that BB gun you’d been asking for. You love on her daughter as if she’s your own, and when you thought something had happened to her, you freaked the fuck out. That was just last weekend, brother. Have you forgotten already?”

“First of all, of course I’m excited to see my friend. I’m happy that she’s settling into Willow River, and I love that she’s making friends. As far as her daughter, she’s the cutest kid. Bug and I are tight. She’s my friend, too, just ask her.” I chuckle. “And last weekend, of course I freaked out. She was home alone. We were all away, as were her grandparents. Anyone who could have helped her was out of town. She was supposed to text and didn’t. I would worry the same way if it were one of our brothers” wives, or hell, you or one of our brothers. That’s what you do for family.”

“You’re insistent that she’s your family.”

“Friends can be family, Merrick. You don’t have to have the same blood flowing through your veins.”

“I agree with you, but this goes beyond that. You’re wasting time pretending like she’s not the one, Maverick.”

“I’m not pretending anything.”

“Okay.” He raises his hands to ward off my defense. “I’m just trying to help you out. One of these days, it might be too late. I don’t want to see that happen to you.”

“It’s all good, Mer.”

He nods. “All right. I’m going to take this trailer back to Orrin’s shop.”

“I’m going to head on home. I need a shower.”

“Yeah, I’m going to stop and grab some essentials from the store. I can’t live here without food.”

“It’s going to be weird, knowing your room is empty, and that you’ll never be sleeping there again.”

“You can stay here tonight,” he offers.

“Nah, this is your new pad. Enjoy it. It’s a great place, man. I’ve been looking too,” I confess.

“Yeah? Find anything?”

“No, but I’m not in a rush, but like you, I think it’s time.”

“It’s gotten old, right? The constantly going out and chasing women?”

“Yeah, it really has. I guess our brothers were right. They said we’d grow out of it.”

“Let’s not go crazy. If we start telling them they were right, we’re never going to hear the end of it.” He laughs.

“Bet.” I nod. “Bring it in, brother.” I pull him into a hug, slapping his back. “Proud of you, man.”

“Thanks, Mav.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a handful of keys. “You get yours first. You’re always welcome here. No matter what.”

“Love harder.” I recite half our family motto. We all have keys to each other’s places with an open invitation. Even after my brothers were married, their wives were on board with this. Sure, we knock if we think there might be a chance for funny business, but regardless, we know we are always welcome.

Shoving the key into my pocket with a mental note to add it to the keyring in my nightstand that has the keys to my other brothers’ houses, I head back toward home. Thankfully, the rain has stopped. It’s still a dreary day, and the chances for rain to start again are high, but at the moment, it’s just cloudy skies.

As I’m driving through town, I spot Stella’s car sitting outside Dorothy’s Diner. I forgot she told me she was off work at noon today. She must be getting a late lunch. I find a parking spot down the street, maneuver my truck into it, and head inside to see if she wants some company.

As I’m passing by the window and heading toward the door, I see Stella sitting at a table in the back. I freeze because she’s not alone. There’s a man, probably around my age, sitting across from her. He reaches across the table and places his hand over hers.

My heart stalls before it begins to beat to the tune of a jackhammer in my chest.

Why is he touching her?

My feet are frozen to the floor. My eyes are locked on the two of them, three of them. Ada is there as well. She’s in Stella’s arms, holding onto her momma. She doesn’t like this man, or maybe it’s just that she doesn’t know him.

How does Stella know him?

My mind is racing with questions, while my heart feels as if it could explode. I don’t understand what’s happening inside my body. Seeing her with someone else… it’s not sitting well with me. She’s sitting across from a man I don’t know. He’s familiar with her. I can tell from their body language. The only one who’s not sure is Ada.

Stella hands Ada to the man over the table, but he shakes his head. Refusing to take her. Ada reaches for Stella, clearly not on board with this man holding her.

My hands ball into fists at my sides.

That’s my family.

My chest heaves with each breath I pull into my lungs. My lungs are burning. It physically hurts to breathe, watching the scene before me unfold. The guy reaches for something on the seat next to him. He hands Stella an envelope. They exchange a few words, and Stella shakes her head. I can see the anguish on her face. I don’t give a fuck who this guy is to her. He’s hurting her. He’s hurting my girls.

That has my feet moving.

With each step, I come out of my stupor. As I reach for the door, the guy in question comes rushing out. His shoulder bumps into mine. He doesn’t stop or apologize, he just keeps on walking. I turn and watch him as he gets into a black sedan. I think about chasing after him, but he’s not important. My girls are what matter right now.

Turning back around, I step into the diner. Stella sits with Ada standing in the booth next to her. Ada is clinging to her momma while Stella’s head is bowed. Whatever was in that envelope is opened in front of her, and there are tears rolling down her face.

I slide into the booth, taking the seat he vacated. “Just leave, Derrick,” Stella says, not bothering to look up at me.

Derrick.

Ada’s sperm donor. Now it’s all making sense.

“It’s me, angel,” I say, keeping my voice low.

At the sound of my voice, both girls look up. Ada reaches for me immediately. “Da Da,” she cries, wiggling her arms, wanting me to take her.

Da Da.

If I thought my heart was thundering before, I was wrong. Only this time, it’s not worry or anger or jealousy. It’s love. Love for this tiny human.

“Stel, can I hold her?” I ask, my voice cracking with emotion. I want to just scoop her up in my arms, but something tells me that I need her momma’s permission this time.

“You know you can,” Stella replies, wiping at her cheeks. She helps Ada up to the table, and I scoop my girl into my arms, holding her to my chest. She immediately places her head on my shoulder, and I rub her back.

“I got you, Bug.”

She whimpers, tucking her body tight into my chest.

“What’s going on, Stella?” I can’t hide the worry or the emotion in my voice. Ada calling me Da Da, and seeing Stella so upset breaks my heart. I never want my girls to know pain.

My girls.

As I rub Ada’s back and wait for an explanation from Stella, it hits me.

Merrick was right. They were all right.

Stella isn’t just my friend. She’s my fucking heart. The love of my life.

I’ve placed her in the friend box because the thought of not having her in my life is soul-destroying. I was keeping her at arm’s length when I should have been holding her as close as I could. Both of them belong in my arms, with their hands gripping my heart inside my chest. It belongs to them.

“Not here.” She’s barely holding on to her emotions. Her voice is gritty, and her eyes are welling with more tears.

“Do you have a tab?”

“No. We didn’t get that far.” She wipes at her cheeks, but more tears continue to fall silently.

I nod, pulling my wallet out and dropping a twenty on the table. “Let’s go, baby.” I stand with Ada in one arm. I offer my free hand to Stella. She takes my hand and allows me to pull her from the booth. She grabs the papers and shoves them back into the envelope before pushing them into the diaper bag.

I lead them out of the diner and down the street to my truck. This time, I open the passenger door for Stella and wait for her to climb inside. Once she’s settled, I lean in and kiss her lips. “I’ve got you, baby.”

Her sad tear-filled eyes find mine, and I vow to give this woman the world.

“Ready to go bye-bye, Bug?” I ask my daughter. That’s what she is. She’s mine. No one can tell me any different. She chose me, and I chose her back. From this day forward, I’m her father. That’s just how it is.

“Da Da, bye-bye.”

“That’s right, sweetie.” I put her in her seat and kiss her cheek before closing the door.

“My car,” Stella says.

“It’s fine where it is. We can come and get it later, or I’ll have my brothers bring it to my place. Right now, we’re getting out of here.”

She doesn’t object.

Reaching over, I lace her fingers with mine. She grips my hand tightly, as if I’m her lifeline, and I want to be. I am her lifeline, and she’s mine.

“I’m going to lay her down.” I nod toward a sleeping Ada in my arms. I was able to get her out of her car seat without waking her up.

“Okay.”

“Get comfortable.” I nod toward the couch. “I’ll be right back.” In my room, I put Ada in her Pack ’N Play. Well, it’s not hers, but it might as well be. She’s the only one who’s used it in recent months. I make sure her ladybug is close. I turn on the monitor and grab the handheld unit, taking it with me to the living room.

“She go down okay?” Stella asks.

“She did.” I place the monitor on the coffee table. “You want something to drink? Have you eaten?”

“No, thank you, and yeah, I ate lunch.”

“What’s going on, Stella?”

“Derrick texted me this morning that he was coming to Willow River to see me. He said he wanted to talk. I thought maybe he was finally coming around, you know? He’s her father. He’s missing so much. She’s this amazing, smart little girl with so much love to give and he’s missing all of it. Every day I think about the things he’s missing out on. I thought he finally had his shit together.” She huffs out a humorless laugh. “I guess he does, just not in the way I had hoped. I really wanted my little girl to have a daddy who loves her.”

“She has that.”

“What?” She tilts her head to the side in confusion.

“Me, Stella. She has me. You heard her earlier.”

“I’m sorry about that.”

“I’m not.”

“Maverick, my head is a jumbled mess, and I can’t process this.”

“Then let me help you. I’m her father. The two of you are mine. My girls. She’ll never know what it’s like to grow up without a male role model in her life. She has nine uncles, because we have to count Deacon.” I smile. “And me.”

Her bottom lip trembles and it reminds me so much of Ada. “Help me understand.”

“I’m fucking this up.” I stand and drop to my knees in front of her on the couch. I take her hands in mine, tracing her knuckles with my thumbs while I try to gather my thoughts.

“I’m going to screw this up, but I’m just going to be me for a minute. Bear with me, okay?”

She nods. “Okay.”

“I learned something today.” She smiles at that. “I saw you with him. Let me back up. I saw your car as I was driving through town, and you know me. I take every opportunity to be with the two of you. So I stopped. As I was walking inside, I saw you with him. I didn’t like it.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I’m pretty sure I know what a heart attack feels like. I was angry, jealous, envious, confused. I didn’t want another man anywhere near my family. Not a man I didn’t know. I didn’t want another man holding my little girl or putting his hand over my woman’s.”

I stare down at our joined hands, trying to find the right way to say what I need to say.

How do I make her understand? How do I make this incredible woman fall in love with me? There is no such thing as life without the two of them being mine. It sounds crazy and possessive, but I don’t care.

“Maverick?” I can hear the confusion and hope in her voice.

Peering up at her, her big blue eyes are swimming with tears, but inside them I see faith. I latch on to that and tell her exactly what’s inside my heart. “I’m in love with you. Not because you’re my best friend, but because you live here.” I pull one hand away and place it against my chest, over my heart. “You and Ada, this is where you’ll stay.”

“M—Maverick.”

“All this time, I was determined to keep you in this box, as just friends, because the thought of not having you and that little girl in my life hurt too much. So, I did what I thought I needed to do. I kept you close yet still so far away. I should have been gripping you as tightly as I could. I should have held you both close. Without me realizing it, you both slipped over the walls around my heart and made it your own.”

“You love us?”

“I do.” My admission has her lips pulling up in the corner. “I love both of you with everything that I am.”

“I love you too.” Her grin is now a full-blown smile.

“Yeah?”

She nods.

“That’s good, angel, because I want to build a life with you. I want to be Ada’s daddy and give her brothers and sisters to play with.”

Her breath hitches. “I want that too. I’ve loved you for so long. I hid it because I knew that’s not how you felt.”

“I was too stupid to see it. My brothers tried to tell me. I refused to listen. I wasted so much time.”

“No. It gave us time to fall in love. To get to know each other without the pressure of a relationship. I wouldn’t change it, Maverick.”

There is nothing left to say, so I slide my hand behind her neck and guide her lips to mine. I kiss her with all the love that’s been bottled up in my heart. I kiss her until we’re both breathless.

I move to the couch and pull her onto my lap. “Now, tell me about Derrick. What did he want?” She tries to move off my lap, but I hold her tight.

“I need to get something. I’ll be right back.”

Reluctantly, I let her go. She digs around in the diaper bag and pulls out the envelope. I’d forgotten about it. She comes back to the couch, takes her rightful seat on my lap, and hands it to me.

I kiss her shoulder, wrapping an arm around her waist, holding her tightly as I open the letter with my free hand and start to read. With each word, I feel both anger and happiness. Anger that this man could toss that sweet little girl away so easily, but happiness that he’s out of our lives. Ada will only ever know me as her father.

“He doesn’t know what he’s missing,” I say, dropping the legal document to the couch that outlines how Derrick is signing away all of his rights to Ada.

“Yeah,” Stella whispers.

My mind is all over the place as I process what I just read, but it keeps coming back to one thing. Ada is mine. “Stella?” I wait for her to turn to look at me over her shoulder. “I want to be her daddy.”

She stares at me slack-jawed and in shock. When I don’t say anything else, a sob falls from her lips. “I love her, Stella. I love you both with an intensity I didn’t know I was capable of. It hit me like a ton of bricks when I saw the two of you in that diner today.”

“She loves you.” Stella turns so that she’s straddling my lap. Her arms wrap around my neck, her face burying there as she cries. I hold her tightly, giving her time to let go. I’m here to pick her up when she’s ready. “She called you Da Da.”

“She did,” I say as she lifts her head to look at me. Her face is red and blotchy, and her eyes are red as well.

“That’s a big deal, Maverick. I can’t just let her call you that or encourage it. Not until I know this is forever.”

“Oh, baby, this is forever.”

I can see the worry in her eyes. I get it. She’s a mom first, and taking care of her little girl and protecting her and her heart are her number one priorities, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Marry me.”

Her entire body stills. “What?” she murmurs.

“This isn’t your official proposal. I know better than that, but consider it a pre-proposal.”

She laughs. “That’s not a thing.”

“This is our life, angel. We make it what we want it. What I want is for you to know that I love you and your daughter. I want you to be my wife and her my daughter. One day in the very near future, I’ll ask you the right way. I’ll drop to one knee and present you with a ring, but until then, I need you to know that’s where this is going for me.”

“Maverick.” My name is a whisper on her lips.

“I love you. Marry me.”

“My pre-proposal answer is yes.” Tears swim in her eyes, but her smile tells me another story. Not one of sadness, but one with tears of happiness and love, and our future growing old together.

I whoop out a yell and grip her in a fierce hug. Ada cries over the monitor and I wince. My yell must have woken her up.

“I’ll get her.” Stella climbs off my lap and heads down the hall to my room to grab her.

“Mom, Mom,” Ada sniffles.

“Hey, sweetheart. Did we wake you up?” Stella asks softly. Her voice trails off, so I know they’re on the way back to the living room.

“Hey, Bug,” I say when they get close.

“Da Da,” Ada says. She doesn’t reach for me, but that’s okay. Her tiny hands are already gripping my heart.

“I’m sorry I woke you up. Mommy made me very happy,” I explain.

Stella sits on the couch next to me, and I snuggle my girls close. This is my future, and I can’t fucking wait to see what comes next.