Chapter Thirty-Three

Blake

Five Years Ago

Something was wrong with Killian tonight. He seemed more on edge than usual. Not that that was anything unusual, but tonight it was worse. His eyes darted across the crowd of people in the club, his hand wrapped around the microphone so tight I could see the whites of his knuckles, and he hadn’t smiled once. It almost looked like he was just going through the motions, like some sort of weird robot. He missed words to our songs we had performed and practiced a thousand times, his voice trembled with every line, and the few times he glanced my way, he looked almost heartbroken.

Dean caught my eye as he finished his solo and jutted his chin toward Killian. I shrugged because I had no idea what was going on in our singer’s head. He’d had off nights before, but this one was bad. If we could sense Killian was off tonight, could anyone else? We had worked too hard for one off night to ruin everything. Who knew who might be in the crowd?

I caught sight of Tommy in the front row, right in front of me, and my face broke into a smile. All thoughts of why Killian was behaving the way he was flew out of my head when my boyfriend winked at me, his dark eyes sparkling with happiness. I couldn’t wait to be done with this show, so I could be with Tommy again, his mouth on mine, the way he moaned into my ear and told me loved me. He was the only thing that mattered in my life.

We finished our last set of the night, and Killian dropped from the stage, heading toward a few girls I recognized from Canfield High. One of them threw their arms around his neck as she leaned in for a kiss.

What about Matthias and the promises Killian had filled his head with? I thought to myself. Was that why he was upset, or was it something else?

“Is he okay?” Tommy murmured into my ear.

I wanted to taste that mouth. Claim him in front of everyone, but I didn’t. Instead, I touched his arm lightly and moved in closer to catch his familiar clean scent.

“I don’t know. He’s been an absolute bear all night.” I didn’t mention the bump Killian had snorted right before we went on stage. His use of drugs had started to become a reoccurring theme on nights we had a show and don’t even get me started on the drinking.

We both watched wide-eyed as Helena appeared, and even though we couldn’t hear her over the crowd of people in the club, it was more than obvious that she was angry. I tried to read her lips, but all I could make out was “ What in the actual fuck?” and “Accident.” Then Killian was grabbing his sister’s hand so he could drag her to the small closet the club called a dressing room.

“It’s Matty.” Tommy held up his phone. “Helena texted us. He was in a car accident.”

That might explain everything about Killian tonight. “Was it bad?”

“It sounds like it could have been worse. A few bruises and a sprained wrist. Someone t-boned him. He’s in the hospital. We should probably go see him.” Tommy worried his bottom lip between his teeth.

Helena came storming back toward the stage with hot, angry eyes and Killian on her heels. Neither one of them said a word to us as they walked across the room and out the front door. Guess that meant he wouldn’t be staying to help us pack up all our stuff. It was going to be a long night, and we still had an hour’s drive back to Canfield.

“I don’t think we’ll have to worry about Matty tonight.” I nudged Tommy’s shoulder.

He grinned. “Probably not.” Tommy’s fingers brushed mine and then he gripped two in his hand. “You coming over tonight? Jackson’s home for the weekend. He wants to take us out to lunch tomorrow.”

Maverick slammed his drumstick against one of his cymbals. He scowled at me when I looked in his direction. His emerald eyes flashed with irritation before he looked away, and I once again wondered what had happened between him and Jackson. They had been inseparable. Now Maverick had turned into whatever he was now. Mean and hostile.

“Do you want to join us, Mav?” Tommy asked, and my drummer shook his head. “I’m sure Jax would love to see you.”

Maverick fiddled with one of his drums before he yanked it off the set. “I don’t want to spend time with you or Jackson. You can tell him I said that too. You can all fuck right off.” He growled and bared his teeth like a caged animal.

“Mav—”

“Fuck you, Blake,” Maverick snapped. “Don’t say another word to me.”

Tommy took a step forward. “Don’t talk to him like that. Just because you’re going through something doesn’t mean you can take it out on everyone else. You’ve been a real dick lately.”

“And I plan on staying the lovely asshole that I am. Fuck you, too, Olson.” Maverick was on a roll tonight. His eyes darted down to where Tommy was still holding my fingers, and his whole expression changed, a smirk pulling at his lips.

I quickly untangled our fingers. “Mav, someday someone is going to put you in your place. Knock you on your ass the way you deserve.”

“That going to be you, Blake?” Maverick raised his brows. “Or maybe your sweet Tommy wants to give it a try?”

I pressed a hand against Tommy’s chest. “Don’t.”

“We wouldn’t want you to hurt yourself,” Maverick taunted, then his face turned dark. He wasn’t a big guy, but he had enough anger inside of him these days that I was terrified of what might happen if he was provoked. The beast that might be unleashed.

“Whoa, everyone looks so serious. Am I interrupting?” Dean placed his guitar case down and raised his palms when his brother hissed at him. “Jesus, Mav, you need to learn how to relax.”

Without a response, the three of us watched Maverick stalk away, his hands balled into fists at his side. He ignored the girls who tried to talk to him, only stopping when he reached the bar. He grabbed the beer placed before him and downed the entire thing before he raised his hand for another.

“Maverick needs someone to take him down a few notches,” Tommy muttered.

Dean shrugged. “You’re not wrong.” He flashed a smile that didn’t quite meet his eyes. “I’ve tried, more than once, to get him to talk to me. He just... He’s so angry all the time, and I don’t know how to get through to him. Maverick and I used to be so close. He’s not the same person he was when Jackson was here.”

“He acts like he hates Jackson,” Tommy said.

Dean shook his head. “Trust me when I tell you he doesn’t.” He kicked at one of the microphone stands. “Come on, let’s pack up so we can head home.”

***

Practice was an absolute disaster. The air in the basement was thick with tension. Maverick was in one of his moods, and Killian seemed ready to burst out of his skin. We really had to do something about our communication skills as a band, or we were going to implode before we had a chance to win our first Grammy. And once again, Killian was stumbling over lyrics to songs he should know by heart.

“What’s wrong with you tonight?” I asked against my better judgment.

Killian grunted at me. “Nothing.”

“Right,” I commented. “You’ve only gotten the lyrics to ‘Wild’ wrong how many times?” I jutted my chin at Maverick, who twirled his drumstick between his fingers. He pointed one at Killian.

“Five,” Maverick answered, then narrowed his eyes. “You’re not thinking about Linda, are you?”

Killian huffed. “What the hell ever gave you that idea? Dean, help me out.”

Dean leaned his guitar against his amp. “Uh, well...” He dragged a hand through his green hair.

“It’s not Keely, is it?” I grimaced as I made a circle with my thumb and forefinger with my right hand before I shoved the index finger through it. It was crude, but I was just trying to play my part. Keely had been clingy as hell, and we all thought she’d never get the hint Killian was done with her.

Mav made a gagging noise. “Gross, dude, sloppy seconds? What about bro code?” He thumped a quick beat out on his drums.

“Jesus Christ,” Killian growled. “It’s not Keely: you’re all welcome to her. Could we just drop it?” He suddenly looked like a caged animal.

“Knock, knock,” a cheerful voice called out just as the girls from our last show burst through the basement door. When the dark-haired one started toward Killian, he took two steps back. “What’s wrong, Kill? You look like you saw a ghost.”

He gritted his teeth. “What are you doing here?”

“I invited them.” Maverick looked pleased as he came around his drum kit. “Thought it would be a nice distraction now that we’re done with practice.”

Killian scowled. “Who said we were done?”

“You’re clearly off your game, bro. Maybe a little pussy will help you relax.” Who was I tonight? I tried not to shrink away from the redhead who was watching me. She was too small, too feminine, and not Tommy.

“I’m not doing this with you tonight.” Killian began to gather his things together. “Maybe another time.” He shoved his lyric notebook and music into his bag. “Why is everyone staring at me?” he exclaimed.

Dean squared his shoulders. “You’ve been acting kind of weird lately. We just thought maybe you could use a little fun to help you unwind. You hardly ever hang out with us anymore unless it’s practice or a gig.”

“I’m fine.” Killian huffed.

Maverick titled his head. “Are you, though?”

“Fuck you.” Killian growled deep in his chest.

Maverick smirked. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you, Hampton?”

Oh shit.

In the blink of an eye, Dean and I were pulling Killian off Maverick as the girls screamed behind us. Blood dripped from Maverick’s nose as he attempted to stand up. Was it broken? It looked bad.

“You’re crazy!” Mav exclaimed.

Killian tried to shove Dean and me away. “I want you out! You’re fucking done. You’re out of the band, do you understand?”

Dean yanked Killian back. “That’s not just up to you, Kill. We’re a team, remember? Just because you and Maverick have a disagreement doesn’t mean you can kick him out of the band.”

“Then I’m out.” Killian raised his chin defiantly.

Maverick flashed an evil grin as blood slipped down his lips. “Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, asshole.”

“No one is leaving the band!” I hollered. “What has gotten into the two of you tonight?”

“It’s either me or him,” Killian announced. “I have no damn problem walking out of here and finding another band.”

Dean let out a frustrated sigh. “Jesus Christ!” he muttered. “Girls, you should go. Maybe another time,” he said as they started to protest. Once they were gone, he moved to face Killian. “You are not to touch him, go near him, or look at him right now. Do you understand?”

“Whatever.” Killian folded his arms over his chest.

Dean poked in the chest. “Say it. I’m not playing games.”

“Fine, I understand.” Killian’s jaw tightened.

Dean turned to look at his brother. “Is your nose broken?” Maverick shook his head. “Same goes for you. You leave one another alone until we get this sorted.”

“I understand.” Maverick stuck his middle finger up and laughed loudly when Killian made like he was going to come at him again. “Sorry.”

“Prick.” Killian seethed.

“Fag.” Maverick shot back.

The room went deathly quiet.

“What did you just say to me?” Killian snapped.

Maverick shrugged. “You heard me, Killian. You think I don’t know about you and Matthias—” He never finished his sentence. Killian shoved Dean and me out of the way to knock the drummer to the floor. Then he climbed onto his chest and wrapped both hands around his throat.

“Jesus Christ!” I screamed.

“You ever fucking say his name again, and I will kill you!” Killian exclaimed as Maverick’s eyes seemed to bulge in their sockets. His face had turned an odd shade of blue. “You don’t ever say that name!” Tears streamed down his face as Dean and I struggled to drag him off Maverick.

“You’re fucking crazy!” Maverick croaked out hoarsely as he scrambled away.

“Call me that again. See what happens, because they won’t be able to save your ass!” Killian warned.

Dean glanced over his shoulder as he comforted his brother. “Are you gay? I’m not judging you, man.”

“Do you really have to ask?” Killian bared his teeth.

Maverick laughed bitterly. “Someone saw you and Fuller together a couple of weeks ago. Holding hands.” His voice rasped.

“They’re lying,” Killian insisted. My eyes bounced between the two of them. “Who told you that, huh? Which one of your so-called friends?”

Maverick waved a hand at him. “Like I’d tell you. So you could what? Kick the shit out of them or choke them like you did to me. You’re nuts, Hampton.” He managed to climb to his feet.

“What about....” Dean stopped when Killian narrowed his eyes. “Nothing, never mind.”

Killian pointed at Maverick. “Fuck you.” He raised his middle finger around the room. “Fuck all of you. We’re supposed to be a team, right? If you think your friend saw something, come to me. Ask me. Don’t go spreading rumors. How are we supposed to be a band if we can’t trust one another?”

“So, you’re saying it’s not true?” I asked, even though I knew it was.

“Have you ever seen me into dudes, Blake?” Killian shook his head like he was trying to believe his own lie. “Thanks for ruining my night.”

Maverick called out to Killian, “Wait.”

“For what?” Killian swung back around to stare at all of us. “What do you want now?”

Maverick’s brows dipped. “Prove it. Prove that there’s nothing between you and Fuller.”

“My word is my proof.” Killian reached for the door and opened it.

“Your word is shit, Killian. Prove it or you’re out. You decide by next practice.”

The sound of the door slamming shut behind our singer rang through the air.