CHAPTER 38

RIVER

"Another one?" Zander's voice broke me out of my dazed stupor as he hovered over me with a beer in his hand.

God's yes. I need another one. Or five.

"Yeah. Thanks." I offered my Beta an appreciative nod. It was all I could muster right now.

It wasn't a shock to me—I had prepared. Or at least I tried to.

And I was okay with it, I truly was. It made sense. I understood.

But it still hurt.

And for the moment, for right now, I just wanted to forget. So I downed the beer that was in my hand and went back to my guitar, plucking the strings in a sad arrangement that voiced the pain I was currently experiencing.

Zan had found his drumsticks and didn't hesitate to join my melody with a consistent beat against the coffee table that brought life to the dead sounding tune.

Pack time.It helped in moments like this. To have my family around.

Sky looked at me with concern filling those baby blue eyes. She was my sister in every sense of the way and the worried look she gave me showed how much she cared.

"Are you okay?" She finally asked, scooching closer to where I was slumped on the couch.

"I will be," I replied honestly.

"We're here for you man," Axel said. I was so grateful to have him back for the moment and to see his smiling face right now.

"You need food," he declared. "I'm ordering pizza."

I nodded. I could eat. Food might help.

When he was done ordering, he picked up another acoustic guitar and filled the tune with a beautiful harmony, strumming along to the rhythm my fingers picked.

Sky didn't really play an instrument, but her soothing, earthy presence always added a calmness that my jittery head needed right now. Her occasional humming bodied out our symphony, making me smile.

Finishing the song, I felt better.

I wasn't healed. Not by a long shot. But I let the feelings flow out of me into the tune that took all my emotions and left me feeling lighter and less burdened. It was one of the many things I loved about music—it's superpower, if you will.One of nature's many gifts to the world.

Maybe that full feeling I felt when we played would be what it felt like to have a fated mate?

I'd never wanted one before. Never cared for some predestined person to walk in and change everything I worked for and cared about.

Maybe she was right; that I needed to be open to it now.

But I'd deal with it when it came.

If it ever came.

I'd always thought somehow she was my fate. And finding out she was half wolf gave me false hope.

I waited for it. Wondered if it worked differently because she was only half wolf and had never actually shifted. But nothing came. But there was no tangible bond that snapped into place between us—beyond my undeniable love for her. Not like there was between them.

Or how it had been for the few wolves in my pack with their mates.

And that was okay.

It sucked. And I wished it was different. But it was okay.

With my loved ones around me, with the melody complete and out in the universe, I felt better. Even if the space beside me seemed to be missing one very important loved one.

I felt better.

So we moved on to a more hopeful tune, a song that our hearts seemed to know as we played it out and then moved onto another and another. Making music well into the night and going so far as to take the guitars outside to the bonfire that we lit after what felt like too long. A symbol of hope and harmony.

And I felt better.