Chapter 9

"This isthe worst date ever. Dating sucks. Is it worse than when Baroness Bitch-Face tried to kidnap you?"

The SSD agents had put Zee and me in the same jail cell, with open bars on every side so we could be observed by the stoic guards. We both wore cuffs, and Zee's tail had its own heavy ball and chain, weighing it down so he couldn't get up to mischief with it. We had a single bench, where we both sat now, and an open toilet. To make matters worse, the feds had given Zee an unflattering, baggy orange sweater with the word INMATE stamped on it—and he despised it.

"It's not your fault we were tranquilized and locked in a freezer, then a pixie killed all the fae who put us there," I told him.

"Yeah, shit happens, I guess. To us. It happens to us."

Little Jimmy had scarpered as soon as the SSD had arrived, which would have been fine, except I had his murder weapon in my pocket. So, naturally, I'd been arrested for multiple counts of murdering lots of fae, and the defense that I was just a human who happened to have been kidnapped—again—didn't seem to be going down so well with the Special Supernatural Division.

"Have you ever been arrested before?" I asked Zee.

"Me? I'm so fucking offended right now. I am the epitome of good behavior. The model citizen. Sweet and innocent. The absolute?—"

"How many times?"

"Nine."

"Nine?"

"Maybe ten." He shrugged. "How was I supposed to know the hot cops in tight uniforms were actual officers? Also, a whole lot of partners get super upset when they discover their significant other prefers demon dick."

"Ten times?!"

"It was the police commissioner's wife for eight of those." Another shrug. "He paid me a fuck ton of hush money though, so you should probably forget everything I just said."

We were going to need a really good lawyer.

We'd been in the cell a few hours when a deep sigh sounded beyond the bars. I looked up, and there he was—Victor Reynard, looking like the perfect gentleman in his expensive suit, his shoulders straight and silvery eyes intense while concern pinched the rest of his expression.

"Are you alright?" Reynard asked.

Zee blinked, and his tail tried to twitch but was pinned by the ball. "Took your time. Did you have tea before setting off, Your Grace?"

Reynard glanced at me, and I nodded. "We're okay."

"I have Pierce working on your release now."

Pierce was the vampire royal family's scribe and lawyer. "Thank you." But Pierce's help would not be free. I pushed to my feet and met Victor at the bars. It was good to see him. Zee and I had been gone at least a day, so he must have been worried. "We were taken. We didn't kill those fae, Victor."

"Of course not. You do not need to explain. This is all a misunderstanding. I'll have everything straightened out soon."

"For me too?" Zee asked, his voice curiously small.

Reynard dipped his chin. "For you as well, Zodiac."

A tall, imposing, androgynous fae with pale green hair approached from a side corridor. My blood cooled and a tiny stab of fear touched my heart. "Agent Leomaris." They were just as intimidating as when they'd been snooping around the hotel—perhaps even more so now there were bars between us. They'd told me they'd once been a bounty hunter. And they were on my Bad People list.

I'd have preferred Detective Somers, but he'd been suspiciously absent since Zee's performance at Razorsedge.

"Adam Vex, Zodiac," Leomaris greeted in their long, soft drawl that took forever to get to the point. "And Baron Reynard. I'm pleased to meet you, Baron. I understand you're here to aid with your associates' release?"

"I am."

"Then, perhaps you'd like to join us as we discuss this situation." Leomaris nodded at the jailor, who swiped a card over the cell's door and opened the lock. "Zodiac, please be advised that should you translocate when you leave the cell's wards, your guilt will be assumed and you will be charged with further offences."

"Got it, Agent Fae." Zee scooped up the iron ball chained to his tail and hugged it close.

"You should probably use their name," I whispered, leaving the cell alongside Zee.

"Fuck, right. Understood, Agent Leomaris."

"Right this way." Leomaris led us down a blue-carpeted corridor, with blue walls and pale blue ceiling.

"The feds really like blue," I heard Zee mutter behind me.

Once inside a small room—that held a single table with multiple chairs, and cameras blinking from the corners—Leomaris nodded at the jailor and the man waved his keycard, unlocking our cuffs and taking them away with him when he left the room.

As soon as Zee's tail and wrists were free, he whipped his tail out and popped open his wings, suddenly making the room feel small.

"Please refrain from encroaching on my personal space," Reynard said in a tight, mildly irritated voice, which sounded a lot like his everyday voice... or his murder voice... or his need for a little more lemon in his tea voice.

I glanced over my left shoulder to see he'd grabbed Zee's tail an inch from his face.

"You had better let go of my tail or we're going to have a problem." Zee yanked his tail free of Reynard's grip.

"Then do not fling it at my face," Reynard said, folding his arms and staring ahead.

"How am I supposed to contain all of this?" Zee swept a dramatic hand at himself. "If you had dimensions as large as mine, you'd understand."

"If I had dimensions as large as yours, I'd keep them under control."

"Are they alright?" Agent Leomaris asked me.

Were they alright? They weren't physically fighting. Yet. "It's complicated," I told the agent, and took the offered seat at the table.

Agent Leomaris explained the long list of our charges—including multiple homicide, property damage, carrying a bladed weapon, and all manner of bonus charges that added up to winning the top We're Screwed prize. Even with Vampire Pierce's help and Reynard's bail money, it wasn't looking good.

"But I didn't kill those fae," I said. "I know it looks bad. There really was a pixie. How could I physically attack, subdue, and then kill that many fae?" I was the smallest, most unassuming person in the room. "Also, why? Why would I do that?"

"Adam, don't say any more." Reynard's hand landed on my left shoulder. "As the cameras are not recording, I assume you have another reason for gathering us in this room, Agent?"

I hadn't noticed the cameras were off. Reynard was right.

"I have read your statements and I believe your version of events, although the addition of the pixie seems unlikely," Leomaris said. "Regardless, you have stumbled into an operation that is far larger than you realize. I'd like to propose that you investigate the syndicate for the SSD."

"We'll work for you guys?" Zee asked, shifting close to my right while Reynard continued to loom impressively on my left.

"That's correct. You'll gather intelligence regarding the trade of black market goods that will, hopefully, result in prosecution."

"Undercover?" Zee asked, leaning forward.

"Not undercover, as you're not official SSD agents?—"

"Do I get a hat?" Zee asked.

Agent Leomaris appeared briefly perplexed. "A hat?"

"Ooh, or a disguise?"

"No."

"Sunglasses?"

Leomaris frowned. "Also no."

"A long dramatic coat, like yours. I get that, right? Or one of those shiny assassin briefcases cuffed to my wrist?"

"Still, also no."

"Well, that sucks." He straightened, and folded his arms. "What do we get?"

"You get to go free," Leomaris said, simply.

"Yeah, okay. That's good too."

"You're not suggesting we have to bring down the entire fae syndicate?" Reynard asked, a stickler for details. "Just the black market goods operation?"

"That is correct."

"Your thoughts, Adam?" Reynard deferred to me. "I'll have Pierce write up a contract. While I'm sure Agent Leomaris is to be trusted, a contract will ensure you and Zodiac are protected."

"What will that cost you?"

He slow blinked. "Nothing substantial."

I glanced at Zee to my left. "What do you think?"

"I think you don't go to jail, I don't get dropped in the desert without my wings, and I get a new hat. Win-fucking-win."

"But you don't get a hat."

Zee screwed up his nose. "They can't stop me from getting my own hat."

"Okay, but what about the deal? Do we take it?"

"We're already in the middle of this bullshit, might as well do some good shit while we're there. Right? Also, what choice do we have? Do it, or get fucked. With or without a hat."

He was right. We didn't have a choice. "Alright," I told Leomaris. "We'll work for you."

The SSD agent smiled. "A wise move, Mr. Vex."

I hoped so. Because I really did not like the way Leomaris eyed me, as though I was their next bounty and they were about to bring me in.