41. PAUL

With weary eyes, I sifted through the sea of emails inundating my inbox: unread messages, unanswered queries, and unresolved tasks. Delete. Delete. Delete. Soon, this would all be someone else’s problem. Some were marked with red exclamation points as if to say, “You should be paying attention to this!” But I didn’t care anymore. This did not matter anymore, at least not to me.

As the minutes ticked by, the office seemed to quiet down around me, although people were still there, still talking, still taking phone calls. But it was me who was in a solitary moment, left to confront the harsh reality of my situation – the end of one chapter, with no clear path forward in sight and no jobs lined up.

I had looked at a few fine arts degree courses in New York and then at the cost of taking one. All I needed to do was remortgage an apartment I did not own, and I was good!

I sat back and observed Ethan diligently typing away at his laptop. A pang of guilt gnawed at the edges of my consciousness, both for me and for Jack. How easily had I allowed myself to succumb to the rumors and whispers surrounding Jack? But it was too late now. I sighed. I had to move on. I turned my attention back to the screen before me.

A familiar ping broke through the monotony. It was a message from William.

Laura and I are in the pub and we have decided you should move to London!

A soft chuckle escaped my lips as I read his message.

What time is it there?

He was typing…

Pub time

I laughed again.

It’s always pub time in London!!!!

He gave me a thumbs-up emoji. A couple of hours passed, and soon, it was time to go home. I began the routine task of packing up my belongings, the familiar rhythm of an office life that I was now leaving.

The nature of the day was changing as people began to wear the workday down. Keyboards clicked a little bit more softly and in fewer numbers. The low hum of conversation grew sparser. There were fewer and fewer phone calls.

Then something changed. Some sudden commotion on the other side of the office penetrated my consciousness.

I looked up. Standing in the entrance to the long corridor down where I had taken William’s call about Ethan, there he was: Jack.

I looked over at him, and he looked at me. In a moment, he was surrounded by the last few people in the office calling his name, but he kept staring at me.

My stomach churned with a mixture of anticipation and excitement as I watched the crowd gather around him, their voices rising.

I rose to my feet, my gaze fixed on him. He was standing there, all six feet four of him, in his suit, shirt, and tie. He looked so handsome, and he kept looking straight at me. He began to break away from the group that had formed around him. He started walking toward my desk. His strides were purposeful, his face serious. I was unable to tear my eyes away from him.

Soon, he was standing before me at the end of my desk, his gaze open and vulnerable. I gazed at him, my heart racing.

“What are you doing here?” I asked. His unexpected appearance caught me off guard just as I had been unraveling my connections to – my emotions – about this place.

“I’ve come to ask you not to leave,” he said.

“But I’ve given my notice to Harry,” I replied, and I knew at once how stupid it sounded. Jack was our boss. He could let me change my mind if I wanted.

Some emotion passed through him. I saw it shimmer in his eyes.

“No,” he said. “That’s not what I came to tell you. I’m hiding what I really want to say.”

I was blinking slowly. Around the room, people were watching. I never imagined that he could speak like this, so openly, in front of them all. When he had been affectionate toward me in public in London, that had been different. This was our life here. These were the people in our lives.

“What did you want to say?” I asked nervously.

He gave me a beautiful smile.

“I’ve come to tell you that I fell in love with you in London,” he said. “I love you now as much I did then. I am looking for someone to love, someone to trust, someone to look after, who wants to look after me.” He paused. “Are you that person?”

We were standing, facing each other. He was looking down at me from his greater height.

“I was,” I said.

“You were?”

I could feel my heart thumping in my chest.

“I am,” I said.

He broke into a wide grin.

“Will you give me a second chance?” he asked, his voice filled with a vulnerability that mirrored my own. “Will you forgive me?”

I stared at him, overcome with emotion. He stepped forward and scooped me toward him, his arm curling around my back, pulling me into his body. And then he kissed me, there in front of the whole New York office.

“I love you, Paul,” he said.

“I love you, too,” I replied, my voice barely a whisper as I said the words that I had longed to say.

And then he kissed me again.