18. Rendal

CHAPTER 18

Rendal

I plow through my workday like a bull in a china shop, my mind already laser-focused on tonight's plans. The weight of everything Chloe and I said the other night has been pressing on me like a ton of bricks, making it hard to concentrate on anything else.

This morning, I finally got my head on right and reached out to her, asking her to dinner. I hope that it can resolve things between us…but I also don't have answers to questions she'll ask.

Still, I know how fucking crucial this evening is, especially after all the tension between us lately. It's like walking on eggshells, and I'm determined not to screw it up.

As an orc, I'm used to facing challenges head-on, but this... this feels different. More important. I catch my reflection in my computer screen, my green skin a stark contrast to the white walls of my office, and I take a deep breath. Tonight could change everything.

As I'm packing up my things, ready to bolt out the office door, my phone buzzes. My stomach drops when I see Valeria's name on the screen. I answer, and her voice comes through sharp and demanding.

"Rendal, we need to talk about Zola. Now."

Fuck. I feel a knot forming in my stomach. I know I can't avoid this confrontation any longer, but the timing couldn't be worse.

"I'll be there soon," I say, my heart sinking as I realize I'll be late to my dinner with Chloe.

I grab my keys and head out, my mind racing. How am I going to handle this? I can't blow off Valeria—she's Zola's mother, and this is about our daughter. But Chloe... God, I've put her through so much already. The thought of disappointing her again makes me sick.

As I drive to Valeria's place, I rehearse what I'm going to say to her. I need to be firm this time, make it clear that while Zola is our priority, getting back together isn't an option. My hands grip the steering wheel tighter as I think about how manipulative Valeria's been lately, using Zola to try and wedge herself between Chloe and me.

I pull up to Valeria's house, taking a deep breath before I get out of the car. This isn't going to be easy, but it's long overdue. I knock on the door, steeling myself for whatever's coming.

I knock on Valeria's door, my jaw clenched tight. The moment it swings open, she launches into a tirade.

"Finally, you're here. We need to talk about Zola's schedule. You're never around when she needs you!"

I step inside, trying to keep my cool. "Valeria, I'm here for Zola whenever she needs me. What's this about?"

She scoffs, her voice rising. "Oh, please. You're too busy with your new girlfriend to care about your daughter's needs."

My frustration builds, but I force myself to take a deep breath. "That's not fair, and you know it. I'm always there for Zola."

"Really? Then why did you miss her dance recital last week?"

"What? I didn't miss it. It's next month."

"No, it was moved up. I told you about it, but you were probably too distracted to listen."

I glance at my watch, knowing Chloe's waiting for me. Guilt gnaws at my insides, but I can't leave this unresolved.

"Look, Valeria, I'm sorry if there was a miscommunication, but you can't just change plans without making sure I know."

She throws her hands up. "This is exactly what I'm talking about! You're not involved enough in Zola's life!"

My temper flares. "That's bullshit, and you know it. I'm doing everything I can to be a good father."

"Everything except putting her first," she snaps back.

The argument escalates, our voices rising. I'm torn between defending myself and ending this quickly to get to Chloe. But with every passing minute, I know I'm letting Chloe down, and it's killing me.

I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket, and my heart sinks. I know it's Chloe, probably wondering where the hell I am.

"Look, we need to figure this out, but I have somewhere I need to be," I say, trying to keep my voice level.

Valeria's eyes narrow. "Of course you do. Always running off instead of getting your priorities straight."

Her words hit me like a punch to the gut. I pull out my phone, seeing Chloe's message asking where I am. Fuck. I'm already late, and this conversation isn't ending anytime soon.

"That's not fair, Valeria. I'm always here for Zola," I argue. Fuck, I have her most of the time, but I'm not about to open that can of worms with Valeria right now.

As Valeria continues to berate me, I type out a quick message to Chloe. My fingers feel heavy as I hit send, knowing I'm letting her down again.

I'm sorry, something came up. Can we talk later?

The moment I send it, I feel like the world's biggest asshole. I look up at Valeria, frustration boiling over.

"You know what? I always put Zola first. Always. But you just called me over here tonight because you want to monopolize my time. You're using our daughter as a pawn, and it's not right."

Valeria's face contorts with anger. "How dare you accuse me of using Zola! I'm just trying to be a good mother!"

We go back and forth for a few more minutes, neither of us backing down. Finally, I've had enough.

"I'm done with this tonight. We'll talk about Zola's schedule later, when we've both calmed down," I say, heading for the door.

As I leave, I feel the weight of my failures crushing me. I've disappointed Chloe, I'm at odds with Valeria, and I feel like I'm failing Zola. How the hell am I supposed to fix this mess?

I grip the steering wheel tightly as I drive away from Valeria's house, my mind racing with doubts. Am I doing the right thing? The question loops endlessly in my head, each repetition more tormenting than the last.

I can't stop thinking about Chloe, imagining her sitting alone at the restaurant, feeling abandoned. The fear of losing her gnaws at me, twisting my insides into knots. How the hell am I supposed to balance both Zola and Chloe? And Valeria... she's always going to be in my life because of Zola. How am I supposed to handle her?

The pressure of my dual responsibilities feels like it's crushing me. I'm torn between being a good father and being a good partner, and right now, I feel like I'm failing at both.

I can't take it anymore. I pull over to the side of the road, my hands shaking as I put the car in park. I take a deep breath, trying to steady myself before I call Chloe. My finger hovers over her name in my contacts for a moment before I finally press it.

The phone rings, each second feeling like an eternity. My heart pounds in my chest, and I grip the steering wheel tighter, knuckles turning a pale shade of green. When Chloe answers, the hurt in her voice is palpable, and it cuts me to the core. I can almost see her face, those beautiful green eyes filled with disappointment.

"Chloe, I'm so fucking sorry," I start, my voice thick with regret. I run a hand through my short, dark hair, frustration coursing through me. "I know I've let you down again. Valeria called about Zola, and I... I couldn't just ignore it. Shit, I feel like I'm constantly failing you."

I explain the situation with Valeria, laying it all out. As I talk, I hate how much strain my divided attention is putting on our relationship. The guilt weighs heavily on me, settling in my chest like a lead weight. I'm an orc, for fuck's sake. I should be strong enough to handle this.

"I understand this isn't fair to you," I say, my voice barely above a whisper. I can feel the muscles in my jaw clenching as I struggle to find the right words. "I know I need to do better. You deserve so much more than this constant back-and-forth."

Chloe's quiet for a moment before she speaks. The silence is deafening, and I find myself holding my breath. "Rendal, we need to have a serious conversation about our future. This can't keep happening."

"We'll find some time this week, I swear." I hate the way that the silence echoes across the line. "We'll talk."

"Okay." It's all she says, and it fucking kills me. "I have to go put Penelope to bed."

Grinding my teeth, I nod even though she can't see it. "I understand. I'll talk to you later."

The line clicks off, and I feel the weight of everything pressing down on me. The gravity of this situation is becoming too much for me to keep carrying, and I need to find a balance. I don't want to lose Chloe, and I will always do what is best for my daughter.

I don't want to keep failing them both.