Chapter 16

Benji was so nervous his butthole hurt from clenching it.

He was going to meet Sterling's personal assistant and his head of security, and then they were going to meet his mom.

It was a lot for one day.

Still, it was like tearing off a bandage, Benji guessed. He needed to get it done. Sterling had been in town long enough that he couldn't deny they had a thing, and his mom was giving him hell about it because people all around had seen them together, and she hadn't.

And Geoff was starting to send him calendar reminders of all things.

Like birthdays.

Meetings.

Warnings about what Sterling had for lunch.

Warnings that Sterling was buying the office lunch.

Warnings that Sterling was buying the daycare avocado-free lunch.

The ladies at the daycare adored Sterling. He'd been unfailingly kind to them. And they had some new equipment, paint job, books…

It was crazy. Not as crazy as the way that the chicken coop was fancy now, and there was a cozy blanket on the sofa, a car seat in Sterling's truck.

Benji was in the weirdest, most wonderful of whirlwinds.

He wiped his hands on his jeans, then got out of the vehicle, heading into the Mexican restaurant. The daycare ladies were going to keep Xavi until Mom picked him up, then he and Sterling would go to Mom's to visit her. Tequila's was already hopping, but then, it always was.

Please. Please, let me not fuck this up. He'd never met ‘the family' before, and he guessed he wasn't doing that now, exactly, but it sure felt that way.

He saw Sterling's truck parked near the front, and that made him breathe easier. Sterling was here. They would do this together. It was fine. He repeated that all the way in.

"Hola, Senor Benji," one of the servers called.

"Hola, Ray. I'm meeting Mr. Sterling."

"Ah, si. Si, he's in the fiesta room. Would you like me to bring you a margarita?"

"Oh, I'd better not. I have to drive. Iced tea, please, with lime." God, he wanted a drink, but?—

Responsible, that was him.

He headed back, eyes searching for Sterling's craggy, gorgeous face. He found the silver felt hat that nowadays hung on his bedroom wall first, then a huge—and he meant huge—blond linebacker and a tiny sylph of a dude with black hair with purple tips and dark eyes like a demon's. Whoa.

Carson and Geoff, he would guess. They were both stunning.

"Hey." Sterling stood, smiling for him, waving him over. "Saved you a seat."

"Thanks." He was calm…

"This is Carson." Sterling nodded at the Thor dude. "And this is Geoff. Guys, this is Ben."

"Oh my GOD!" Geoff squealed, stood, and hugged him hard. "You're so cute! I love your eyes. I searched for your socials. Where are they?"

"My what?" He wasn't much of a computer guy…

"Your social media profiles." The Carson guy sounded amused. "Geoff does everything electronically."

"Oh." He shook his head. "I don't have a lot of time for that, I guess."

"Ignore him," Sterling told him, waiting for him to sit.

"Thanks." He shook Carson's hand, then sank into his chair. "Ben."

"Hey. The twink here is only vaguely still human. I'm surprised he's not formed out of ones and zeros."

"Fuck off, Gigantor. I'm in charge of keeping Sterling up-to-date. Carson's jealous because he only knows about porn."

"That's the best part of the internet," Carson said mildly.

"Can it, you two." Sterling sat once he was in his chair. "You having a good day, honey?"

"Not bad. We had a peaceful afternoon—no emergencies. You?"

"Well, these two have been like caffeinated gnats all day, but yeah. We got a bunch of meetings out of the way on Zoom."

Sterling had said he had to meet with some investors today about horses.

"Good for you. Did you make the deal that you wanted to?" One of the things Benji loved was how Sterling talked to him about business.

"I did, yes. It's going to be lucrative as hell."

He grinned at Sterling and high-fived, and that drew awwws from both Carson and Geoff. That made Carson grin.

Geoff popped the big guy in the shoulder before leaning toward him over the bowl of chips and salsa. "I'm heading back to the ranch the day after tomorrow, so I'm so glad I got to meet you in person.'

"Ditto. I'm pleased to meet you both." Nervous, but pleased.

"The salsa here is pretty good, man. It's hard to get Mexican food in Aspen that isn't chichi." That was Carson, munching away. He guessed it took more calories to keep that guy going.

"Yeah, but we have a chef at the ranch who can make anything, so—" Geoff winked across the table. "Do you like to cook?"

"I don't mind it. I'm no chef. I cook stew and such. Simple food."

"Just no guacamole, right, babe?" Sterling murmured.

Benji chuckled. "For babies, absolutely."

"Oh, good. I was totally going to get guac. It's so good here." Carson looked back and forth between them. His eyes were as golden as the rest of him, a strange, amberish brown. And shrewd.

"I love guac as long as no one is feeding it to Xavi," Sterling agreed. "That kid can fart."

"And the diaper rash is fierce." He shrugged, hoping that he didn't seem as bad a parent as he felt like he might be. "But I love it. Sterling makes an amazing one."

Both Geoff and Carson stared at Sterling.

Uh-oh. What?

"They've never seen me do anything but grill and smoke meat, honey. If they paid attention, they might know I cook a mean omelette, too."

Carson covered his heart with his hand. "I am wounded, Boss. You never cook for me."

"I never feel the need to impress you."

"Hola, amigos. Are you ready to order?" Ray saved him from saying anything dumb.

"Combo plate. All beef. Three extra tacos."

Sterling didn't even blink at Carson's order.

"Oh, I'd like the mushroom fajitas, please!" Geoff bounced. "And a large guacamole to share!"

Sterling shook his head. "Ben?"

"Chicken flautas, please, Ray. Thank you."

"And I'll have the suizas," Sterling put in, gathering up the menus and handing them over to the server. "So, formal introductions—Ben, this is the keeper of my sanity, Geoff, and the keeper of my safety, Carson. Guys, this is my lover, Ben."

Oh, lover. Okay. Nice.

"Well, it's about time." Geoff beamed, seeming for all the world like some weird proud elf papa. "I mean, honestly, Ben, I've been wanting to meet you since the first email!"

"Thanks. I feel like we've already met. You have very fast texting fingers."

"Oh, you have no idea," Geoff shot back. "I'm amazing!"

Carson chuckled, but chomped another chip, appearing innocent when Geoff gave him a look.

"Geoff is technology personified," Sterling said.

"Well, I can do a lot if it was created for the medical field, and I answer my texts, but…" He was too busy for Instatok or whatever.

That had Carson nodding. "See, that's my point too. I'm fine with using what I need to in order to work."

"Bah. Heathens."

Sterling watched them all with a grin on his face.

"No. I'm not opposed. I have a lot to do. Work, the ranch, the baby, my mom's in town—it was a full life, even before Sterling." Now it was a whirlwind.

"I'm grateful you worked me in, baby." And there wasn't an ounce of sarcasm there. Just a warm, steady regard.

"I am too. It's worth it." Sterling made him feel like he was the only person in the world, and Benji was kind of stupid with it.

The guacamole came, and they all dug in, the happy noises around the table making him laugh a little. Hell, Carson was going to eat it all in about two bites.

Sterling didn't seem nervous about them meeting, which helped, because Benji had been. No one had wanted to introduce him around before.

"Carson, slow down, man. I bet they have more avocados," Sterling finally teased.

"Sorry. I forgot to have second breakfast."

"We'll order another round. It's good fat, after all." Geoff arched an eyebrow at Carson.

"Yep."

Okay, Sterling had said there was something going on there, and he could see the tension. It didn't seem all serious, but it was sure interesting.

At some point they'd explode, there was no question about that.

"Y'all behave." Sterling rolled his eyes at Ben, sharing the joke. "So, is your mom ready to grill me?"

"Yep. She's chomping at the bit, to be honest."

"I bet. I would be." That was Carson. "I would be ready to interrogate."

"Bloodthirsty," Sterling said.

"Do you need me to protect you, Silver?"

"Don't make me beat you, Kit."

His eyebrows went up at the nicknames. It took him a minute, but then he got it. "Sterling Silver and Kit Carson?"

"Yep." Sterling gave him a thumbs up. "Good guess."

"Good deduction, more like."

"True enough." Sterling always seemed willing to give credit where it was due.

"So you're heading back to the ranch tomorrow?" Benji asked, glancing at Geoff.

"I am. I need to get my butt back in my chair."

"What about you, Sterling? Are you sticking around a little?"

"I will be. I mean, I might have to run up next weekend, if you want to come with me."

"I can do that. That Friday is my week to have off." He was desperately curious to see Sterling's place.

"Well, then, we'll make it a date."

Carson made a happy noise. "Good. I need more clothes, man."

"I offered to ship them to you," Geoff said.

"You aren't to be trusted, clothes horse," Carson winked at Ben, playing hard with Geoff.

"‘Trusted'! Look here, Gigantor!"

"Children." Sterling scooted closer to Benji. "We can ignore them. You have someone to come feed and all when we go?"

"I do, yeah. My neighbor and I swap out. Mike's a great guy. He's a manager at Waste Management."

"Nice. Well, then, we should call him up, see if he's willing."

"I will." He wasn't sure what to do with his hands.

Sterling took his, holding it under the table. It didn't even seem as if Sterling was hiding it. That was a bit of a shock, because somehow he would have expected Sterling to be careful out in public, even though they'd been on dates.

He was going to enjoy it, before he had to figure out if he needed to back off.

"Oh God, that smells good," Carson moaned when the food came. Ben could see where that man's heart was.

"Doesn't it? It's absolutely amazing—I love the refritos here." He took some guacamole and salsa.

"Yeah. I notice they're on the vegetarian menu. Somehow I doubt that." Their plates came, the ones with the fajitas sizzling still.

"Yeah, I don't know. One can hope, but they taste like there's lard in them, right?"

"They so do." Carson smacked his lips, and they all laughed.

"Maybe they make fresh ones for veggies," Geoff said. "Vegetarians I mean."

He doubted it, but he thought it was way more likely in Aspen. They were a bit more low-rent here.

He dug in, listening to the discussion around him. As soon as they slowed down with the food, the four of them started talking as well.

It wasn't ribbing or even work. They talked about movies and music. Travel. They touched on the military — Carson had been in the 82nd Airborne, while he'd been in the 101st. They talked about college and fraternities he and Geoff hadn't pledged, Carson and Sterling had.

It was silly and fun and not real challenging. Which was good. He knew his mom wasn't going to be mean or anything, but she was a mom. She would be harder. He needed to conserve his energy.

Carson finally sat back, patting his belly. "Oh, man. That was great."

"It was. I was going to get dessert, but there's no way," Geoff admitted.

"We shouldn't. Momma made an apple pie," he murmured.

Sterling's eyes went wide. "From scratch?"

He nodded. "Crust and all."

"Damn. I'll look forward to that."

"We should get churros to go," Carson told Geoff.

"Ugh. You are a vacuum. I'll get you ice cream later tonight."

"Okay." That sharklike grin did not bode well for Geoff's wallet.

Though they probably expensed things?

"Can you drive my truck back to the house, Carson? I'll pick it up later. Maybe tomorrow." Sterling winked at him.

"I'll drop him off on my way in to work in the morning."

"Okay, sure." Carson nodded. "I got your back, Boss. You need me before then, you call."

"I will. Thankfully, it seems pretty quiet around here."

God, he was dating someone, more than dating someone, who really needed a bodyguard. Whose bodyguard worried about not being in the same house.

"I've got his back. No worries." He didn't grin, because he meant it. He wouldn't let anyone hurt Sterling.

"I believe you. Meeting you has relieved my mind." Carson poked Sterling across the table. "Card? I'll go pay."

"Man, it's like having kids without having any of the fun." Sterling pulled out his wallet.

"Or the poop. Remember that. You never had to deal with that." Geoff winked at him, then blew Sterling a kiss. "I'll call you from the road, Boss."

"You be careful, huh?"

"I always am. I'm not the adrenaline junkie." He got up and smiled at Ben. "It was so nice to meet you."

"You too." He watched Geoff go, then glanced at Sterling. "They're nice."

"They're something," Sterling teased. "No, they're good guys."

"They seem like it. They care about you, very much." That was the important part. "It's good to see. Did they know Sierra?"

"Carson did. Geoff didn't."

"Huh." One day, he'd have to ask Carson what he thought.

Maybe when things weren't so… weird about that. He still wanted to know why Sierra had ghosted him. What was running through her mind.

Benji figured he knew what Sterling felt like now. It made no sense, and it hurt. And he wasn't the woman's brother.

Ray brought Sterling's card back, and he tucked it away. "We have time if you want to sit and finish your tea."

"No, let's go see Momma. I miss Xavi." They were establishing a routine—home, then feeding, loving and feeding and bathing the baby, before sharing their own supper.

"Sounds great." Sterling rose, then held out a hand to help him up, and he felt those fingers on the small of his back as they left the restaurant.

He had to laugh when Sterling even went to the passenger door of the vehicle. "You can drive, you know."

"Hey, you trust me to drop off your kid these days. I can let you drive to your mom's."

"She's very nervous about meeting you, you know. She's worried you'll think we're boring."

"Pshaw." Sterling rolled his eyes. "I know you're not boring. You're amazing."

Pleasure arced through him at that. He wasn't sure he felt as if he was amazing, but Benji would take it. Sterling made him feel like Superman.

He drove into town proper, and it didn't take but a few minutes to get to the house he'd grown up in. Mom's house was a simple, pretty two-story near the school, well-maintained and well-loved. He pulled in next to her Honda, cutting the engine. "This is it."

"Nice." Sterling studied the house. "I can see you being a kid here."

"It was a great place to be a boy. I loved it here."

"Well, you ready to do this?" Was Sterling nervous? He sounded as if he was a little.

"As ready as you are, huh?" He leaned over and stole a kiss. "C'mon, honey. Let's go."

"Pie ahoy." Sterling winked broadly, then got out of the vehicle. They walked up to the house together.

Mom met them at the front door, opening it with a grin. "Hi, baby. Did you have a good lupper?"

"Yes, ma'am. I ate the whole restaurant, but I left room for pie. I'd like to introduce you to Sterling Jordan. He's Sierra's baby brother."

"I can sort of see the resemblance, now that I know to look for it." She held out one hand. "Ellie Collier. Pleased."

"Nice to meet you, ma'am." Sterling shook hands. "I was going to bring a bottle of wine, but I forgot it in my truck." Sterling's cheeks went red.

"Oh, that's sweet. You can bring it by next time." Mom chuckled. "Or you can have your people drop it by. Benji said you had people."

"I guess I do." They all trooped inside, Sterling following last, letting him and Mom set the pace. "Benji says you're a teacher? What grade?"

"Kindergarten through third. This year I have second. It's a great age."

"Yeah? Why? I'm not around a lot of kids full-time." Sterling had eased up, and now he was smiling.

Benji had to grin. Sterling could be charming. He was in his element talking to people.

"Oh, they love facts, and they're trying to understand the world around them. They are amazing and evolving." She applauded and led them into the living room. It was filled with dainty chairs and tea tables, a cart with a doily. She'd worked on making this room just so for years.

"Mom loves her job," Benji whispered. "More than anything."

"I can see that." Sterling looked around, then picked a chair to perch on.

Benji preferred the family room, with its comfy couches and big-screen TV. Mom was also a sports fan.

"Ha! I love you more than anything." That was his mom, giving him the stink eye. "Well, and my grandson."

"Yes. He's perfect, isn't he?" Benji glanced around. "Where is he? I haven't missed his supper, have I?"

"He was asleep at daycare, so I brought him in. He's still in his car seat in the kitchen."

"Oh good. I'm gonna go check on him." He knew he was abandoning Sterling, but he needed to see his boy, and he wanted Sterling to sink or swim a little. Mom wouldn't let the man out of the formal living room until she talked to him a bit without Benji.

God knew he didn't want to spend the evening in there. Those chairs sucked.

Xavi was awake, but not yet crying, eyes following the cat as he paced along the kitchen counter.

"Are you watching Samson, baby boy? Is that kitty watching you?"

He needed to think about getting Xavi a dog. Seriously.

Xavi cooed and kicked, reaching for him, and Benji picked his boy up and checked his diaper.

Still good. Not even a touch ripe.

"Okay, bud. Let's go see Granny for a minute, and then I can feed you, huh?" He carried Xavi back out to the front room, ready to be a distraction if he needed to be.

Mom already had the photo albums out. Jesus Christ.

"Look who's awake!" He called, hoping to distract from whatever goofy-assed naked or embarrassing or ridiculous baby picture she was showing off.

"Hey, kiddo." Sterling smiled at Xavi when Benji brought him over to let him get the admiration he needed, and Xavi reached out to grasp Sterling's fingers. His kid loved the guy about as much Benji did.

Lord help him, they both had it bad.

Xavi leaned hard, and Sterling took him. "Hey, buddy. Did you have a good day?"

Benji started laughing as Xavi gurgled and jabbered, baby feet kicking like mad things. He was telling Sterling all about it, and it might be the cutest thing he'd ever seen.

"Oh, he really likes you," Mom said.

Sterling chuckled. "He's the neatest kid I've ever met. And I have baby goats on the ranch."

"Oh, my God, baby goats are so cute." Sterling sounded tickled as all get-out.

Benji rolled his eyes. "Oh my God. Don't get her started. She is madly in love with my goats." He shook his head, fighting his laugh. "Did I tell you what she did? She dressed them in pajamas when they were little, then she put the video on TikTok."

"Really? Huh. Did you get a lot of views?" Sterling asked Mom.

She nodded, and it was clear she was tickled as hell. "Oh my God, yes!"

When she spoke, Sterling glanced from her to him and back to her, and then he grinned.

Mom made it about half a second before she asked, "What?"

"Benji sounds just like you."

"Do you think so?" Mom sort of beamed, and it was cool to know she was so pleased. They were close—of course they were, especially since Dad had passed on—but every so often they felt as if they were simply trying to get through the day like everybody else. Between baby and work and grandbaby and work and the ranch and after-school activities—life was crazy. "I like him, son. I think he'll work." She fastened Sterling with a death glare that was pure mama bear. "Assuming, of course, that you're good to my son and my grandson."

Sterling nodded, expression serious. "You have my word on that, ma'am."

"I'd better. Now you all come on. Let's go sit on the comfy couch—that baby's going to need his dinner now, and God knows that apple pie is not going to eat itself."

Apparently either holding her grandbaby or asking Mom about her TikTok views was enough for Sterling to be promoted from fancy parlor to the family room. Thank God for that because Benji had worked all day, and he wanted to sit down, hold his son and feed him.

The fact that the apple pie smelled like heaven on earth wasn't bad either.