15. Peanut and Trouble

CHAPTER 15

Peanut and Trouble

LIAM

I t was hard to concentrate with all the noise and commotion going on around me. The living room was still a construction zone, with workers hammering and sawing and painting, trying to bring the old house into the twenty-first century while still keeping some of its original charm.

It was a delicate balance, one that I was all too familiar with. Trying to move forward without losing sight of where I'd come from, trying to build something new and beautiful from the ashes of my broken past.

As I watched the chaos unfold, my mind drifted back to the phone call I'd had with Cleo just a few days ago. Cleo, my sassy, no-nonsense friend from New York who had helped me design the new interiors of the house.

I remembered the surprise in her voice when I'd called her out of the blue, the way she'd teased me mercilessly about my sudden disappearance.

"Well, well, well," she'd said, her voice dripping with mock indignation. "If it isn't the elusive Liam Denison. To what do I owe the pleasure of this rare and unexpected communication?"

I'd laughed, feeling some of the tension drain out of my shoulders at the sound of her familiar, snarky tone .

"Hey, Cleo. I know, I know. I've been a little off the grid lately."

"Off the grid?" she'd scoffed, and I could practically hear her rolling her eyes through the phone. "Honey, you've been in a different stratosphere. I was starting to think you'd been abducted by aliens or something."

I'd chuckled, shaking my head even though she couldn't see me.

"No aliens, I promise. Just needed a break, I guess. A chance to get away from everything and start fresh."

There had been a pause, a moment of uncharacteristic seriousness from my usually irreverent friend.

"This is about Caleb, isn't it?" she'd asked softly, her voice gentler than I'd ever heard it. "About what happened between you two all those years ago?"

I'd swallowed hard, feeling a lump rise in my throat at the sound of his name.

"Yeah," I'd admitted, my voice rough with emotion. "It's about Caleb. It's always been about Caleb, if I'm being honest with myself."

Cleo had sighed, the sound heavy with understanding and compassion.

"Oh, Liam. I'm so sorry. I know how much he meant to you, how much you loved him. And I know how much it hurt when things ended the way they did."

I'd taken a deep, shaky breath, trying to steady myself.

"It did hurt," I'd said quietly. "More than I ever thought possible. But I'm trying to move on, Cleo. Trying to build a life that's not defined by what happened."

"And that's why you're renovating the old house?" she'd asked, a note of excitement creeping into her voice.

I'd smiled, feeling a flicker of warmth in my chest at her words.

"Yeah, something like that. I want to make it into a home again. And I was hoping maybe you could help me with that? "

Cleo had laughed, the sound bright and joyful.

"Oh, honey. I thought you'd never ask. Of course I'll help you. I'll make that house so fabulous, you won't even recognize it when I'm done."

The sound of a particularly loud bang jolted me out of my reverie, bringing me back to the present with a start.

I glanced over at the kitten, the tiny ball of fluff that Caleb had brought over the previous night. It was curled up on the chair next to me, sleeping peacefully like it didn't have a care in the world.

I envied it, in a way. Envied its innocence, its ability to live in the moment without being haunted by the ghosts of the past. Because god knows I couldn't do that, couldn't escape the memories and the emotions that had been stirred up by seeing Caleb again after all these years.

It was like a wound that had never fully healed, a scar that still throbbed and ached when I pressed on it too hard.

And seeing him standing there on my doorstep, with that damn kitten in his arms and that look of hope and fear and longing in his eyes. It had been like pouring salt in that wound, like ripping open the stitches and letting all the pain and the anger and the unresolved feelings come pouring out.

I didn't know how to handle it, didn't know how to reconcile the part of me that still loved him, still wanted him with every fiber of my being.

I knew I needed answers, needed closure. But I also knew that I couldn't let myself get lost in the past, couldn't let my feelings for Caleb overshadow the reason I had come back to Oakwood Grove in the first place.

To find myself, to heal. To build a life that was truly my own, free from the expectations and the demands of my parents and the world I had left behind.

I took a deep breath, trying to focus on the conversation at hand. But it was no use. My mind was already racing ahead, already making plans and decisions that I knew I might come to regret.

I walked over to the chair where the kitten was sleeping, scooping it up gently in my arms. It stirred, blinking up at me with sleepy eyes.

"Come on, little one," I murmured, stroking its soft fur. "We're going on a little adventure."

I grabbed my keys and headed out to the car, settling Peanut into the passenger seat. As I drove through the quiet streets of Oakwood Grove, my mind raced with thoughts of the past, of the future, of the tiny creature curled up beside me.

The little one seemed to like her name that I'd given her.

Right now, Peanut needed me. Needed me to be strong, to be steady. To take care of her the way Caleb had taken care of me, all those years ago.

I pulled into the parking lot of the vet clinic that I had found online. Taking a deep breath to steady myself. Then I reached over and scooped up Peanut, holding her close to my chest as I made my way inside.

The receptionist looked up as I entered, a bright smile on her face. "Good morning! How can I help you today?"

I cleared my throat, suddenly feeling awkward and uncertain. "Um, hi. I found this kitten and I'm taking care of her now. I just wanted to bring her in for a checkup. Make sure she's healthy and everything."

The receptionist nodded, her expression softening as she took in the sight of Peanut. "Of course. Let me just check with the vet and see when we can fit you in. Why don't you have a seat, and I'll be right back."

I murmured my thanks and made my way over to the waiting area, sinking down into one of the hard plastic chairs. Peanut squirmed in my arms, letting out a soft mew of protest.

"I know, I know," I soothed, stroking her head gently. "I don't like waiting either. But it's for your own good, little one. We've got to make sure you're ship-shape and bristol fashion. "

I chuckled at my own joke, shaking my head. Bristol fashion? Where the hell had that come from? Maybe Cleo was rubbing off on me more than I realized. She was always spouting off weird phrases and obscure references, her quick wit and sharp tongue keeping me on my toes.

Speaking of which, I figured I might as well check in with Jimmy while I waited. See how things were holding up back in the big city without me.

I pulled out my phone and dialed his number, drumming my fingers impatiently on my knee as it rang.

"Liam, my man!" Jimmy's booming voice filled my ear, making me wince and pull the phone away slightly. "How's life in the sticks treating you?"

I rolled my eyes, even though he couldn't see me. "It's not the sticks, Jimmy. It's a charming small town with a lot of character."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say. So, give me the scoop. How's the house coming along? You turn it into a palace fit for a king yet?"

I snorted, glancing down at Peanut who was curled up in my lap, fast asleep. "Hardly. It's a work in progress. But it's getting there. Slowly but surely."

"And how about you? You doing okay out there all by your lonesome?"

I hesitated, not sure how to answer that. Was I okay? It was a loaded question, one I wasn't entirely sure I knew the answer to.

Before I could formulate a response, a familiar voice drifted in from the clinic entrance, making my heart stop dead in my chest.

"You've got to be kidding me," I muttered under my breath, my grip tightening on the phone.

"What? What's going on?" Jimmy asked, his voice laced with concern.

But I barely heard him. Because there, standing in the doorway was Caleb. Again. Just like last night when he'd shown up at my door with this very kitten .

"Jimmy, I've got to go," I said, my voice tight and strained. "I'll call you back later."

"Wait, Liam, what's…"

But I was already hanging up, shoving my phone back into my pocket with shaking hands.

Caleb was still standing there, looking as surprised to see me as I was to see him. Our eyes met, and I could see the recognition flicker across his face, followed quickly by a mix of emotions I couldn't quite decipher. Slowly, hesitantly, he started walking towards me.

I felt my heart rate kick into overdrive, my palms growing damp with sweat. Despite our encounter last night, I still wasn't prepared to face him again so soon, especially not in such a public setting. The memories and emotions stirred up by his unexpected visit were still too raw, too fresh.

But I couldn't exactly run away, not with Peanut in my arms and the receptionist watching us curiously from behind her desk. So I just sat there, my jaw clenched and my eyes fixed straight ahead, waiting for him to make the first move, to break the heavy silence that hung between us.

He sat down next to me, the chair creaking under his weight. I could feel the heat of his body, the subtle scent of his cologne. It was all so familiar, so achingly reminiscent of the countless hours we had spent together, side by side and hand in hand.

"Liam," he said softly, his voice rough and uncertain. "I didn't expect to see you here. Especially not so soon after... well, you know."

I let out a harsh, humorless laugh. "That makes two of us. I thought you were just dropping off the kitten. Didn't realize you'd be following us to the vet."

He flinched at my tone, at the bitterness and the anger that laced every word. "I'm just here to arrange vaccinations for the livestock. It's that time of year again. I had no idea you'd be here with... Peanut, was it? "

I nodded, my jaw still tight. "Right. Of course."

He hesitated, and I could see the struggle on his face, the war between his desire to talk to me and his fear of saying the wrong thing.

"How have you been?" he asked finally, his voice soft and hesitant. "I mean, since last night. I know it was probably a shock, me showing up like that."

I wanted to laugh again, wanted to scream at the absurdity of the question. How had I been? How did he think I had been, after he had shattered my heart twenty years ago and then suddenly reappeared on my doorstep?

But I didn't say any of that. Instead, I just shrugged, my eyes still fixed on the wall ahead of me.

"Fine. Just peachy. Nothing like having your past show up uninvited to really make you appreciate the present."

He sighed, running a hand through his hair in a gesture that was so familiar, it made my chest ache with a mix of longing and frustration.

"Liam, I... I know things ended badly between us. And I know my showing up last night probably stirred up a lot of old feelings. But I just want you to know that I'm sorry. For everything."

I felt my anger flare, hot and bright and all-consuming. Sorry? He was sorry? As if that could erase the years of pain and loneliness, the endless nights spent wondering what I had done wrong, what I could have done differently to make him stay. And now he had the audacity to show up twice in less than a day, throwing my carefully constructed life into chaos.

"It's a little late for sorry, don't you think?" I snapped, my voice sharp and cutting. I shifted Peanut in my arms, using her as a buffer between us. "You can't just waltz back into my life after twenty years, drop off a kitten like some kind of peace offering, and expect me to forgive and forget like nothing ever happened."

An elderly woman sitting across from us looked up from her magazine, eyebrows raised. I lowered my voice, but the edge remained. "And now here you are again. Are you following me, Caleb? Because I gotta say, it's not a good look."

He flinched again, his eyes filling with a deep, aching sorrow. "No, Liam, I swear. This is just a coincidence. I truly am here for the livestock vaccinations. I had no idea you'd bring the kitten in so soon."

"Well, unlike some people, I actually follow through on my responsibilities," I muttered, immediately regretting the low blow but unable to stop myself.

Caleb's face fell, and for a moment, I saw a flash of the boy I had loved all those years ago – vulnerable, hurt, and achingly familiar. But I steeled myself against the wave of emotion threatening to overwhelm me.

"I know, and I'm not asking for forgiveness," he said quietly. "I know I don't deserve that, not after the way I hurt you. But I need you to know that I never meant to cause you pain. Not then, and certainly not now."

The sincerity in his voice made my chest tighten. I wanted to believe him, wanted to let go of the anger and resentment that had been my constant companions for so long. But the fear of being hurt again, of letting him back in only to watch him walk away, was too strong.

"Yeah, well, good intentions and all that," I said, my tone bitter. "Look, Caleb, I appreciate you bringing Peanut to me. Really. But I can't do this. I can't sit here and pretend that everything's okay, that we're just two old friends catching up. It's too much, too soon."

I stood up abruptly, clutching Peanut to my chest like a shield. "I have to go," I said, my voice rough and unsteady. "Peanut needs me, and I need to not be here right now."

Caleb nodded, his eyes full of a sadness that I couldn't bear to look at. "Of course. I understand. I'm sorry, Liam. For everything. For last night, for today, for... for all of it."

I turned away, unable to handle the weight of his gaze or the sincerity in his voice. But before I could take a step, the receptionist called my name, letting me know that the vet was ready to see Peanut.

Relief washed over me, mixed with a twinge of something that felt dangerously like regret. I nodded at the receptionist, then glanced back at Caleb one last time.

"I have to go," I repeated, softer this time. "Just give me some space, okay? I need time to process all of this."

Without waiting for his response, I followed the receptionist back to the exam room, my heart pounding and my mind racing. As the door closed behind me, I let out a shaky breath, trying to focus on Peanut and push thoughts of Caleb out of my mind.

But even as the vet began her examination, I couldn't shake the feeling that this was just the beginning. That despite my best efforts to keep the past at bay, it had come crashing back into my life in the form of the man I had never truly stopped loving.

And I had no idea how to handle it.

The vet was kind and gentle, examining Peanut with a practiced eye and a soothing touch. She assured me that the kitten was in good health, just a little undernourished and in need of some TLC.

I listened attentively as she went over the proper care and feeding instructions, nodding along and making mental notes. I was determined to do right by Peanut, to give her the love and attention that she deserved.

Even if I couldn't seem to do the same for myself.

After spending a small fortune on supplies and medications, I thanked the vet and gathered Peanut up in my arms, ready to head back out into the world.

But as I stepped into the waiting room, my heart sank. Because there, still sitting in the same chair I had left him in.

I could feel Caleb's eyes on me as I left, could sense the weight of his gaze like a physical thing.

I didn't look back, didn't let myself waver. I had made my decision, had chosen to focus on my own healing and growth. And as much as it hurt, as much as a part of me longed to turn around and run back into his arms I knew that it was the right choice, the only choice. Because I needed to learn to stand on my own two feet, to build a life that was truly my own.