Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty-Two

SIYANA

“Come on wench, open that mouth and tell me how much you hate me now.”

Theo’s voice was the first thing I heard as the foreign world of ice and that sinister voice melted away, leaving me in a dark void. That odd dream left a feeling of fear gnawing in my belly, but I focused back on the sound of Theo’s rumbling voice, anchoring me in the present.

It wasn’t real. This was.

“Now?” I croaked, my throat constricting around the word. An overwhelming dryness filled my mouth and throat, as if I hadn’t drank anything in weeks. I must have slept with my mouth open. I forced a small amount of spit down, swallowing thickly as I added, “Bold of you to assume I haven’t hated you this entire time.”

His deep, booming laugh had my eyes flying open in shock. After how I’d stormed out of that cavern, and the way we’d clashed about the bond, I’d thought he’d at least still be flustered and confused, like I’d been. But that didn’t seem to be affecting the dragon in front of me, now.

Never before had I seen such a fierce yearning in his deep blue eyes as he gazed down at me. The intensity of his stare was almost overwhelming, drawing me into its depths like a moth to a flame. It seemed as if he were baring his very soul to me, willing me to understand the depth of his desire.

“Is your love language degradation, wench?” he asked, arching a single eyebrow as he waited for my response. He reached up, brushing away a strand of hair that was caught in my mouth to tuck it behind my ear.

My breath caught at the adoration I felt pouring from his every word and touch. He was still playful and teasing, but it felt rooted in something more now.

Confusion and butterflies took flight within my belly, warring with each other over how I was supposed to feel. This is what he always did to me, though. A few words and a glimpse into the real Theo and I always caved, despite any previous feelings of hurt and distrust.

Not again.

I scowled at him as I realized he was cradling me in his lap.

“No, this is my hate language, dragon boy.”

A soft trill sounded on my left and my head rolled to the side, instantly feeling an overwhelming need to put eyes on Kaida after that harrowing dream. I knew it hadn’t been real, but my nervous system demanded to see that my baby dragon was still exactly that, and that he was here and safe.

He was curled up and staring at me, tail flicking around in agitation as his gaze bounced between Theo and me.

“I don’t think my dragon likes you, either,” I surmised. I laughed at the thought, but my chest constricted, forcing a deep, painful cough from my lungs. Levity slammed into me with brute force, sobering me and bringing me back to the moment. “I feel like death,” I murmured, my eyes drooping with the exhaustion I seemed to be fighting off by the minute.

“I’m glad you are awake, finally.”

Sinda’s voice filled my head, though the way she spoke now was much gentler than I remembered her being. My mind snagged on her last word after a few seconds, and I parroted, “Finally?”

I wasn’t sure where she was, but as my eyes swept around the cave, I could only see the remaining unhatched eggs, Kaida, Theo, and myself. Even Katla, the little twin who hated me, wasn't present.

“Theo will explain. I’m hunting with Katla. We will be back soon.”

The connection between us severed and I groaned, hating that I needed to depend on Theo for anything in this moment. “Why is it that Sinda seems to be able to come and go from my mind as she pleases? She broke through my defenses earlier today.”

I turned my head back toward Theo as he hovered above me, the action taking far more exertion from me than it should have. His lips thinned as his nostrils flared, just before he took in a deep breath.

“That wasn’t earlier today. It was a week ago.”

I blinked at him, confusion at his words swirling through my hazy brain. “No. It was just before I took that nap. I think I’d know if a week passed by, dragon boy.”

“Then tell me why you’re unable to move from my lap right now, wench? If you hated me as you claimed, you’d be pushing away from me, if you could.”

His retort was full of his usual arrogance and had me bristling before attempting to move. All I managed was a measly rocking motion with my head in his lap, which resulted with him clearing his throat and something hardening beneath my skull.

If my eyes could have filled with fire, they would have at that moment. “Do you seriously have a hard cock right now, when I’m seemingly immobile in your lap?”

He snapped, “It’s the dragon within me. Take it up with him.”

My eyes narrowed in his direction, but I was distracted mere seconds later as I suddenly smelled the scent of bread. My stomach rumbled with aching hunger as he lifted a piece into my view. “Do you just blame him for everything? How convenient.”

My question was ignored as he pressed the bread against my lips and demanded, “Eat. You need to recuperate your strength after the quickening. Sinda is hunting for meat for Kaida. You both were in a dreamstate for seven days as your bond underwent an ancient trial.”

My mouth opened from shock and he took that to his advantage, pressing the tips of his fingers and the bread between my lips and into my mouth. I growled and bit down, chomping on his fingers with as much strength as I could.

His words of a quickening and dreamstate were quickly forgotten with his unwelcome intrusion.

“Ow!” he yelped, snatching his fingers from my lips as I smirked in victory.

That’ll show him to put his appendages in my mouth without being welcomed. Not that any part of him would ever be welcomed by me.

The thought had me internally withering at how often I seemed to be lying to myself as he growled at me. “You’re insufferable. I’m just trying to make sure you’re taken care of.”

Something about those specific words broke open the freshly sealed wounds of rejection I’d felt multiple times with him.

“Who decided that was your job, Theo?” I asked, infusing my voice with thick sarcasm. “Because I’m pretty sure you made it clear that we aren’t compatible and that our marriage will be over whether I want it to be or not.”

Silence stretched as we engaged in a silent battle of wills, each of us glaring daggers at the other.

Eventually he caved, eyes rolling back in his head before fluttering shut. “I deserve that, and I’m sorry. I deeply regret how our last conversation went.”

Well, well, well. Had the undine god broken free of Elysium and frozen over all of Edath? That seemed about as likely as Theo feeling regret.

“What was that?” I quipped. “For some reason my ears don’t work when your eyes are closed. Look at me when you say that.”

His eyes appeared again, flashing with sparks of blue as his dragon pupil narrowed and focused on me. “Why I like you is beyond my comprehension, wench.”

The small admission had my mouth slamming shut and those damnable butterflies in my stomach multiplying in droves. No . I wouldn’t let him in that easily.

He sighed heavily as he shook his head. “I won’t blame my dragon for my words, despite the desire for the bond being forced by his needs. I alone decided to say exactly what I did, so that you would leave and be safe from me. From us. I thought it was the right thing at the moment, but when I returned to our alcove and couldn’t find you…”

I wanted to ask him to continue. A yearning opened up in my chest that needed him to admit he felt what I did. Yet I remained silent, wanting him to be the one to bare his feelings and attempt to connect.

The ground shook and I knew a dragon drew close. From the way Kaida and Theo remained calm, I knew it had to be Sinda.

He glanced toward the entrance to the nest and sighed. I knew our moment was gone, just like that, and the armor he kept around his heart was clearly back in place. When he glanced back at me and lifted bread to my lips, there was no longer a soft nurturing energy to him. It felt stiff and awkward, and I hated my heart for the way it ached when all I wanted was for it to harden.

“As I said in the hot springs, stop messing with me. I’m not putting up with this any longer,” I hissed, mustering as much energy as I could. His head jerked back as I continued, “You can’t act like you truly care about me one moment and then simply return to the cold-hearted drackya who is merely keeping me alive for the purpose of our temporary marriage of convenience. I’m not some toy to occupy your time with. I’m a real person, with a beating heart and emotions.”

As I did with my mind, I began to build a wall around my heart, exhausted and more than finished with his inability to be vulnerable and honest. As much as I resented him for his part in this back and forth, at some point I had to decide to be done as a player in this game.

That point was now.

“Be the real version of you, for both of our sakes.”

Sinda and Katla dropped into the nest at the end of my whispered words and reconstruction of my mental wall, and I turned my attention to them. I felt Theo’s legs move before gentle hands lowered my head to the ground in replacement of them.

I guess that was his choice, plain and clear. I was on my own.

This time it didn’t hurt as much, because it was exactly what I expected of him. Coward.

He glanced back at me, and for a second my breath caught at how gorgeous the silver scales on his face looked reflecting with the light of the bonfire in the room. It was a shame that his personality didn’t match that beauty.

“Sinda is politely asking you to open your mind to her, so that she may talk to us both at once, in regards to the quickening.”

His words may as well have been imbued with his powers of ice, with the way they speared my heart. The quickening. The supposed reason I slept for a week and was now unimaginably weak. That was a welcomed change of topic and good use of what little energy I still possessed.

Instantly, I tore down my walls and spoke to her as I watched her place the spoils of her hunt at Kaida’s feet, with me trying not to grimace as he tore through bone and flesh with ease. “Thank you for not breaking down my walls forcefully, though I’m still unsure of how you did that.”

The thought was unnerving. I wanted to know that my mind was mine alone to share or not.

“Drackya cannot do that, if that’s what you are concerned about,” she mused as she crunched on her own prey, sending sprays of blood onto the scales around her mouth as well as the floor. My stomach churned at the gaping void of space where the animal’s head once was. “Only full-blooded dragons have the ability to tear down non-mated human’s walls, and it still took a considerable amount of energy to get through your tightly constructed ones. I’d rather not have to do it again.”

Her admission only offered me an ounce of relief.

“Now, it is time to discuss what you and Kaida just went through, as there wasn’t time to explain prior to the quickening. If you wouldn’t have joined him quickly, there was a chance the bond would have been rejected.”

“But I thought you didn’t think I was worthy of the bond with him, so why would you ensure I had the chance to complete it?” The words were out of my mouth before I realized how accusatory they sounded.

Her chest expanded with a chuff and her laughter sounded through my mind. “I like this fiery side of you. To answer your question, I did that because I accept that there are things in this world that I cannot decide or meddle in. Love and bonds are sacred, and every decision in relation to them needs to be in the complete control of those involved.”

I didn’t miss the way her eyes slid to Theo, who stood above me, rolling his eyes at her before leaning back against the wall. I was so incredibly uncomfortable laying flat on the ground, incapable of sitting up and stretching out the tightness I felt in every inch of my body. It was on the tip of my tongue to ask him to help me to sit up and lean back against the wall, but I swallowed it.

I’d drawn a line, and I was going to stick to it, regardless of my personal comfort.

“So, I truly was asleep for a week, lost in some kind of trial?”

Her eyes shifted back to me for a second before returning to Theo and ignoring my question. “You told me you would ensure she was provided for upon waking. Why are you not doing so now?”

He scoffed loudly before crossing his arms against his chest. “I tried. She refused to accept my help.”

“That’s not what I refused, and you know it,” I murmured, unable to bite back the words of resentment.

“Have you both considered relieving this tension through pleasures of the flesh? I think it would fix much of what is lacking between you.”

I choked on my spit and began hacking profusely as it went down the wrong pipe. My vision blurred as tears sprang to my eyes and my chest tightened.

A warm hand touched my shoulder before gently moving to slip under my back and help me sit. A cold wetness touched my lips, and on instinct I opened them, greedily drinking down the water provided. I drank until my stomach hurt from bloating and my throat no longer felt like I’d inhaled the sands from Eruthya’s deserts.

“We will not be engaging in physical intimacy,” Theo answered, his voice far too close to my ear, sending an entirely unwelcome shiver down my spine. That was funny, considering he’d just had a hard cock from merely the touch of my head in his lap. “Now, can we please focus on the quickening and what they saw? You said the images you gleaned when Kaida sent them to you were unusual.”

I was still stuck on Sinda plainly telling us to fuck out our problems, but quickly tucked it away. As my eyes opened and Theo took away the empty flask of water, I shoved down my pride and asked, “Can you please help prop me up against the wall?”

“And feed her some of your rations while we talk. I don’t care what mental war you two have going on, but I will not let my offsprings’ bonded die right after finding her. It is a pain that I do not wish upon anyone.”

Her anguish and demanding tone had me reflecting upon the memory of Theo’s mother being her bonded. She was right. Whatever Theo and I had going on couldn’t be my focus anymore, I had a baby dragon to take care of and be around for.

I turned my head, making eye contact with Theo out of my peripheral vision and nodded my agreement. “I won’t refuse, anymore. I need to regain my strength.”

He let out a breath and quickly helped slide me up against the wall before settling in at my side with bread and dried meat in his lap. Kaida had finished his meal and got up to follow me, curling up on my free side but not before narrowing his gaze on Theo.

I felt the drackya bristle and ask quietly, “What did I do to you? I’m your king and you will respect me, young one.”

Kaida lifted his head again at his words and let out a hiss as his body rumbled. I felt his protectiveness floating through our bond as he gently settled his head in my lap, getting his bloody mouth all over my clothing. That was going to be tedious to wash off in the springs.

Theo grumbled to himself as he began to feed me. I focused on chewing and swallowing as quickly as I could, stopping myself from thinking of how intimate this felt.

In-between bites, as I felt the energy to, I recounted our time in the dreamscape from beginning to end and was met with silence afterwards.

“The quickening wipes the dragon’s and human’s mind of who they are, in an effort to ensure the bond is of pure intent and not for malicious or personal gain on either side. It leaves you at your most authentic and pure self. If either participant fails to choose to save the life of the other, without knowing why they would do so, it signals you are not worthy and the bond will dissipate.”

Her words made sense, and I quickly swallowed my mouthful of bread before asking, “That sounds exactly like what happened–why would our experience be considered unusual?”

“Kaida is a seer.”

My head snapped toward Theo, despite my utmost desire to not look into his eyes with his nearness. Some things were too important. “What?”

“Yes, Katla and Kaida are both seers. It has been countless centuries since the last set lived. They are always born in pairs, with one seeing the future and one seeing the present.” Before I could ask which Kaida was, she answered. “Katla sees the present of any territory within Edath. On our hunting trips, I have taught her to use it to detect where our prey is. If news of her existence escaped this mountain, she would be hunted and bonds forced on her over and over, in an effort to control her power for gain. Kaida has more security, being bonded to you already.”

So that meant Kaida saw the future. I thought back to his eyes swirling and sparking in the same manner as the sky during the quickening, as well as the way his words felt detached.

“From what I can deduce, I believe your quickening took place in the middle of Kaida having a premonition. There should have never been a third party there speaking to you, Siyana.”

My blood ran cold at the memory.

Choose. Either you die, or the dragon does.

I would never let Kaida die, if I had a say.

"Sinda and I talked of the plan to go to Sanctum and find answers while you both slept,” Theo offered as he lifted more dried beef to my mouth. I greedily chewed on it as I nodded for him to continue.

“If what you saw is the future, we have to take into consideration that it very well could be something we must face in search of the undine elemental god. Are you willing to fly there still?”

Before I could answer, my guard went on high alert as Katla left her mother’s side and slowly moved toward us. Kaida’s head popped up, and he issued a warning growl. His twin lowered her head and let out a whine as she continued closer, and my entire body went rigid as she stopped near my boots and looked at me.

“She’s waiting for permission to approach,” Theo whispered, startling me.

“Oh…oh!” I murmured, my heart beating frantically at the thought of her deciding I was once again a foe and biting my toes off. She waited so patiently and showed no signs of aggression, so I conceded, “You can approach.”

Instantly, Kaida and her leapt toward each other, rolling around and playfully nipping at one another. I couldn’t help but grin at the babies, loving to see Kaida enjoying himself as he should at this age. He quickly wore himself out, however, clearly not recovered from the quickening either as he flopped to his side and panted.

“Since the completion of the quickening, Katla now senses his energy within you, as we all can. You are now dragon kin, Siyana. Welcome.”

Resolve formed in my heart with her words. I would ensure Kaida and myself were prepared for whatever came our way. I’d protect and cherish our bond, forever, but that meant admitting neither of us were ready to face any enemy.

I turned to look at Theo, admitting to myself that he was the best bet we had right now. “I want you to train us. Together and separately. I won’t fly into Sanctum until I am confident we stand a chance, and I’m not too prideful to admit that we don’t right now.”

Sinda’s approval rolled through my mind and I lifted my chin as I stared into Theo’s eyes, waiting for a response.

“Then we will train every day and night once you’ve both recovered your strength, but don’t expect me to go easy on you,” he warned, a dangerous glint entering his eyes that I hadn’t seen since he’d thrown me over his shoulder and paraded me out of my home.

I couldn’t help the scoff that came from me as my brow pinched. “As if. I fully expect to be shown why you’re feared. Because as of right now, I don’t see it.”