Chapter 6

CHAPTER SIX

RAVEN

“ L ocal law enforcement will catch those responsible for the fires in time,” Ren says as I lean against a tree and enjoy the cool breeze.

I love his confidence. About everything. That’s something I lack, though I hide it. I don’t like being vulnerable, which is why I used to force myself to try new things, and to go new places. Until I hit a brick wall, one with my father’s name on it.

Nothing on Earth is like it used to be, especially for women. The Coalition reduced us to sexual objects by taking away our rights, our education, and essentially brainwashing the males here. Many families, like mine, tutored girls in private, but still, the aliens left their mark, making life that much riskier for a woman, and more so for one who can’t see.

That never stopped me from venturing out. I used to take my cane, load up with a few knives, and head out to explore. A year ago, my father put an end to that. He hired a guide to lead me around the inside of what I’ve nicknamed The Zone , a ten-block radius around our home.

With the guide’s help, I learned every square inch, including the boundaries of my new and limited world. Then my father took away my cane, to ensure I wouldn’t violate our agreement and go beyond the approved area. Next, he wrapped up that tiny gift with a ribbon I haven’t been able to break by telling me horror stories of what lies beyond the zone.

At first I thought he was exaggerating, but I’ve smelled the smoke from the fires, heard the fear in people’s voices as they talk about the Brotherhood’s increased control and violence. Now I’m scared to venture into the unknown alone.

Thanks, Dad.

I have the freedom to come and go to our house at will. To choose my friends and boyfriends. To spend my time how I wish. No parent wants to control a twenty-nine-year-old, and I recognize they’re trying to protect me, but because of their love, my world is quite tiny.

But it’s expanding now that I’ve met Renikk. And I plan to get to know him really well.

Music blares from a boombox. The ground vibrates and my feet start tapping to the beat.

“Let’s dance,” I say, grabbing Ren’s hand and heading to the dance area. I wonder how Noah managed to snag batteries for the boombox. Since the occupation, they’re hard to find.

No matter. I’m not missing this chance to dance!

“Raven, I cannot dance with you.”

“Sure you can. Just move your body to the beat.”

“It’s not proper. Dancing is intimate. Like touching.”

“Only if you dance like this.” I loop my hands around his neck and sway as if there’s slow music playing. I’d rather dance slowly with my shadow than dance to fast music if it means holding the man who’s been watching over me for months.

Some people might think Ren following me all this time is creepy, but he’s never touched me, never threatened me. And I have a good feeling about him. Really good, like he and I are meant to be. But that’s foolish. I just met him.

“Raven, this is not?—”

“Proper. I heard you.” I stop long enough to place his hands on my hips. “That’s better. And if you want to debate if this is proper, you’re going to have to do it while dancing because my body’s telling me to move.”

With his scent enveloping me and his breath striking my forehead, I want to do more than dance.

His hands grip my waist and yank me against him so suddenly the air leaves my lungs. “You are tempting me in a way you don’t understand, female.”

My heart races the way he says that. “Why do I already feel like I know you?” I whisper.

Slowly, Renikk sways with me. “What if I told you we are fated for one another?”

“I’d say I don’t fall for pick up lines.” And yet it doesn’t feel like a pickup line.

“It’s not a line.”

I stop dancing. “What are you saying?”

“My people know when they’ve met their mate.”

Reality hits hard sometime, like now. Sure, I could tell myself he’s exaggerating or that it’s just some superstition, but he sounds so convinced .

“I need a drink.” I count the steps until I reach the food table and pour myself a drink.

Refreshing water slides down my throat. I know very little about Renikk and I don’t believe in fated mates, but I know the truth when I hear it. My shadow believes we’re meant to be.

I believe it, too.

Or am I infatuated with him? His scent, the way he watches over me, takes care of me, the way the smooth timbre of his voice resonates inside me when he speaks. He’s been following me for months, guarding me, and I’ve known he was there. A shapeless figure in my mind before tonight, but I’d come to know him on some level.

My shadow. My protector. I sensed he would never harm me, but this is much more than having a guardian angel.

Ren brushes the hair away from my neck before planting a very chaste and yet highly erotic kiss behind my ear. My lower half quivers and a delicious shiver travels through me.

“I didn’t plan to tell you this, not yet,” he says. “There are things you don’t know about me. Things which may alter your opinion.”

“I judge a person based on his or her actions.”

“Which is why I wish to spend this time with you, so you will come to know me and the rest will seem… inconsequential.”

That should set off a warning flag, shouldn’t it? Call me a fool, or maybe I’m just too damn impatient for my own good, but caution isn’t exactly my middle name. I sink my hands into his hair at the back of his head and hold him while I kiss him.

Without any prodding, his lips open to me, inviting me in. I don’t think he expected this, but he sure as hell isn’t pushing me away. Which is good, because I don’t plan on going anywhere. I need this man in my life, and I’m going to make that happen.

I lose myself in the kiss for several heartbeats, luxuriating in his tender touch as one hand settles on my lower back and another tangles in my hair, holding me steady. When someone shrieks in another part of the cemetery, I break the kiss only to realize it’s partiers having fun.

I release my hold on Ren. “Now we know one another a thousand times better than a few minutes ago. No more excuses and no more secrets. Tell me what has you on edge. I’m already at a disadvantage not being able to see a person’s expressions and body language. I depend on the people I care about being honest with me.”

“Honesty is important.”

“And yet you’re hesitating.”

“Fear.”

“Of me?”

“Of losing you.”

That stops me. I can’t guarantee I won’t walk away from him, not without knowing what this big secret of his is.

“My instincts tell me there’s nothing you could say that would scare me off. Lying though… That’s big, Ren. I need to trust the people I’m with.”

“I’m not from here,” he says, his voice full of trepidation.

“I’d already guessed that. Your accent isn’t one I’ve heard before.”

Silence. He’s struggling. Because I’m pressuring him. A relationship should evolve naturally.

A relationship… Am I in a relationship?

Butterflies in stomach? Check.

Touching and kissing at will? Check.

The need for more touching and kissing? Double Check.

And the coup d’état… a feeling that nothing he says will change my opinion of him? Check!

“I didn’t start following you at random, Raven. Your father hired me.”

A take a deep breath. “A bodyguard,” I say, not entirely surprised, though a little disappointed in my parents. I told them I wanted to be independent. Fully independent.

“Yes,” Ren says, tension rolling off him in waves.

“You’ve been watching me all these months. Seen me running through the house in a towel, arguing with my father, and being a brat at times?”

“I’ve only been in your house a few times, and never the upper levels. Your father’s office, to discuss your security, though I’ve seen you listening at his door when he was unaware.”

“And you never said anything?” That surprises me. The people my father hires are one-thousand percent loyal to him and his interests. Not to me or mine.

“I was there to protect you, not interfere with your life. I had orders not to let you know I existed.”

“To fool me into believing I finally had my freedom?”

“I did not want to deceive?—”

“No, of course not. That was my father’s doing. But I’m a grown woman. He should have told me. Or you should have.”

“If I had told you, then I would have been removed from my position. And I would not leave you unprotected like that. Whether you agree with your father’s actions or not, he is right. This is a dangerous world for a female, and even more so for one who cannot see.”

“I’m sure he would have hired another bodyguard in that case.”

“I will not trust your life to another,” Ren says with a stern voice that tells me I’m more than a job to him.

“Can I touch your face?” I ask.

“Why?”

“I want to see you.”

“But you are blind.”

“I can draw an image of you in my mind by learning the contours of your features. The depth of your eyes, whether your jaw is square, or your cheekbones are high and angular or low and subtle. If your eyebrows are thick and bushy, if your nose is long or wide. Right now, your face is a blank outline to me and that bothers me, because I really like you. You’re no longer some faceless entity I question even exists, but you have the face of one. I’d really like to discover the details, to know you better.”

“Yes, sholani. I want you to know me.”

When my fingertips glide over his cheeks, he inhales a long breath, one that makes my lower half thrum. That’s not a reaction I’ve ever had with a male, especially from touching his face. And Ren’s is a strong face. A square jaw with a hint of scruff, but no mustache. Smooth skin except a scar above his left eyebrow, and deep-set eyes. His brows perch upward. Confusion, perhaps.

“How are you doing there, my shadow? Surviving my sandpaper hands?”

His hands cover mine, and his thumbs stroke my skin. “Soft. And perfect.” He draws my fingertips to his lips and kisses them. It’s innocent, and yet as erotic as the kiss we shared moments ago. How does he do that?

“Ah, well, you’ll think differently when the cold weather gets here,” I say.

“I hope to still be here.”

A jolt of fear moves through me like an undertow threatening to drag me under. “Where are you going?”

“When your father learns you know of my existence, I’ll be forced to return home.”

I don’t understand why that would be the case. My father would never have hired him to protect me if he didn’t think he was a good person. If Ren’s assessment is accurate, this will be a huge issue. I can’t even convince my dad to let me go to the ocean several miles away. A trip to Russia, Africa, or wherever Ren’s from, is not going to happen.

I can’t imagine not having Ren by my side, talking, supporting, and just being himself. A great guy who feels like… home .

Only better.

My hands sink into his hair. Thick and longer than I imagined. He moans once causing my lower half to pulse. The need to touch more of him, to elicit that erotic sound again, has me reaching higher and higher.

When my hands near the top of his head, his hands capture mine and bring them to his lips. This time he kisses my palms, the tease. I want those lips on other parts of me. Farther down.

I lower my hands. “I think maybe you were right.”

“About?”

“Touching is very intimate.”