Chapter 31

Chapter Thirty-One

Skipping dinner was not an option. I had to put on a brave face, but I wasn’t sure how I could do that when my eyes were bright red from crying. They were almost literally a red flag, alerting everyone to my current meltdown.

If I kept my distance, maybe no one would notice. The lights were usually dimmed for dinner. Then again, shifters had great eyesight, so it probably didn’t matter how low they were.

There was a knock at my door. It was Aunt Elara. I’d recognized her steps on their way over, nearly groaning when they stopped in front of my door.

She knocked again when I didn’t answer.

“Piper?” she called.

I didn’t answer, and she knocked again.

She wasn’t going to leave. You didn’t knock three times and call out if you weren’t digging in.

I got out of bed.

“Come in,” I said, trying to keep my voice bright and chipper. Letting her in was better than the spectacle of her calling for me in the hall.

She walked in and shut the door. Her worry lines were out in full force. The story of my breakup with Kicks had clearly run through the pack like wildfire through tumbleweeds after a year-long drought.

“You heard,” I said.

“I’m sorry. I know he’s my nephew, but you can talk to me.” She walked toward me, arms outstretched. I was getting hugged whether I wanted it or not.

“I’m okay. It’s for the best,” I said as I waited for her to let go of me. Her hugging me felt like someone taking a hammer to a new bottle’s worth of tears.

The second she let go, I turned toward the drawers, afraid she’d see my eyes watering. “I was just finding something to wear for dinner.” How was I going to make it through the meal if I couldn’t keep it together with his aunt for two minutes?

“I wanted to bring this to you, just in case.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a bottle of something that rid the red from your eyes.

“Thank you.” I couldn’t afford to refuse it. So much for looking smooth and in control.

“Do you want me to walk down to dinner with you?” She was reaching out, touching my arm as if she wanted to hug me again.

Yeah, that wasn’t the look I wanted. Get dumped by her nephew and then need his aunt to hold my hand to make it to dinner? No way.

“Really, I’m fine. The shock of it threw me, but that was all. After everything your nephew said to me, I didn’t expect it at all. I’m okay, though.” I patted her hand and then moved to put some space between us. One more hug and I’d crack for sure.

I gathered up every ounce of energy I had, every scrap of strength, and straightened my shoulders. “I will be fine.”

She smiled. “I know you will be. You’re much tougher than you look. You’ve already proven that several times over.” She eyed me up, as if trying to find an opening to hug me again.

I made myself a moving target as I fiddled with clothes, shoes, and anything else I could find.

“I’ll see you downstairs?” she said.

“Yes. I’ll be there soon.”

She finally left, and I went back to my choices, my hand instinctively going to a dark blue velvet dress. It was the kind of thing that made the most of a woman’s curves, that drew the eye and yet didn’t make it look like you were trying too hard. It had always seemed like it was too much until this very night. Now it was just enough. I wouldn’t walk in like a wallflower.

I piled my hair on top of my head, holding it up with some pins, wanting nothing to distract from the elegant cut and lines of the dress. I slipped on a pair of four-inch strappy heels I’d also avoided and then walked out of my bedroom door, looking like a million bucks even as I felt like something tossed into the gutter.

All eyes swung to me as I walked into the great hall. Everyone was curious to see what my new standing in the pack would be. There had been a certain level of protection granted to me as Kicks’ mate. Now I was a lone female in the pack, not that I cared about that. Let them think they could screw with me. I wasn’t as helpless as I looked, especially with my wolf beside me. I could feel its muzzle brush against my hand, as if it were letting me know it wasn’t going anywhere tonight.

I glanced toward the place I typically sat, wondering if I should go there or somewhere else. I certainly had no desire to sit next to Kicks. Seemed he didn’t want to sit next to me either, as he’d relocated. I didn’t let my eyes rest on him, or the woman he was sitting next to, who leaned toward him, appearing riveted by their conversation. Did he even notice I was here? He didn’t so much as glance my way. Did he care so little that he’d moved on already? My presence meant nothing? How could I have made such a poor choice in judgment again? Maybe it was supposed to be just Charlie and me. Screw men.

I made my way to my usual spot, noticing Aunt Elara was still sitting there. At least she wasn’t forsaking me. A young girl, Addison or something like that, sat in the spot typically occupied by Kicks.

I glanced over at Varic, nodding. He did the same, a smile on his lips as if he’d just spotted his dessert. Athena was the only one in the room openly glaring at me, and she wasn’t holding back at all. Her eyes were nearly glowing, as if she could barely stop herself from shifting so she could rip out my jugular with her bare teeth. Varic would keep her in line. More concerning with that one was possible poisoning.

I took my seat. Aunt Elara patted my leg and the young woman next to me gave a hesitant smile.

Platters were served, and I watched as they came around. If Athena wanted to kill me, she would be killing everyone else at my table, since there didn’t seem to be a way to only poison me.

I took as much food as needed to not look like I was such a mess. No one here was going to have any gossip about how I couldn’t even eat, and everyone was staring at me, whether overtly or not.

Aunt Elara was the true miracle of the evening, talking and talking, filling the dead space and joking enough here and there to make me smile. Even when I had no idea what she was saying, I could nod and pretend to agree and she covered for me, as if we were having the most entrancing conversation.

The entire time, I couldn’t seem to stop my awareness of Kicks. His every movement, the way he put his arm around the back of his companion’s chair. Was he calling her darlin’ with that Southern accent that had always melted me? How had I fallen for the wrong guy again? I’d tried to be so careful, not jumping in fast. He’d waited, stuck it out with me, acted as if he loved me. And then, on a dime, he didn’t even want to speak to me.

I could feel my throat tightening. I needed to stop thinking of him. It was done. I was done. No more. I was done with men. This would never happen to me again. If I ever got involved with someone again, it would be cold, calculated, and transactional.

I continued trying to fake a conversation with Aunt Elara, forcing the last of my food down. I wasn’t sure how I made it through that entire meal, but I did, even staying for dessert. I didn’t dare leave until more than half of the people here had, or again, they’d carry on about how the rejected human rushed out of dinner.

Kicks got up and left. I tried not to watch to see if the woman he’d been flirting with went with him. That was too much. I wouldn’t make it out of here in one piece if I saw that .

After telling myself why I shouldn’t look, I did it anyway. There they were, walking out together. It felt like I’d just gotten hit by a stun gun. I stood, wanting nothing more than to get out of here, yet didn’t move once I was on my feet.

Aunt Elara stood up beside me, twining her arm in mine. “Okay, I’m ready. Let’s go see those dresses you wanted to alter, and I’ll tell you the best way I think it will work,” she said, as if I’d been waiting for her.

She moved, pulling me along with her. I was in a fog as I tried to keep it together. I didn’t take a full breath until we were in my bedroom and she shut the door.

“Are you all right?” she asked.

“I’m okay. Thank you for walking me up. I think I just want to go take a shower and crawl into bed now. I’m pretty tired.” I was strung so tight I could barely move.

She paused, looking as if she didn’t want to leave. As much as I appreciated it, she was his aunt. Not mine. And when I fell apart, I would be doing it alone.

“You will get past this,” she said.

I straightened, nodding. “I know. I’m fine. Really, I am. I’m just getting used to it. It’s just surprising, but I’m fine.” I kept nodding, the only movement I seemed capable of.

“If you need me, just ask.”

“Thank you, but I’m good.” I was nodding so much, plastering on a fake smile, that I probably looked like a bobblehead. Judging by the way she was looking at me, that might be a generous description.

She left, and I fell onto the bed. I wouldn’t cry for him again. He didn’t deserve another tear from me. I’d made an error. I’d trusted the wrong person—again. But now I knew, and if I had to build an iron heart, if that was what it took to survive, then that was what I’d do.

There was a knock at my door. Before I could answer, it opened and Kicks walked in. It was strange, because I usually recognized the sound of his approach. I’d probably been too busy wallowing.

I immediately got to my feet. “This is my room now. You don’t get to walk in whenever you want.”

He shut the door. “You wouldn’t have let me in if I knocked.”

I pointed at the door. “You’re right. Now get out.”

“I will in a minute, but first I need to speak to you.”

“That’s too bad for you. Get. Out.” I went to walk past him, but he blocked my way to the door.

“I know you’re heading out to a settlement with Varic tomorrow.”

Then he knew more than me, because this was the first I’d heard of it. “What I do is of no concern to you.”

“Except it is. I plan on going back to Arkansas soon, and I wanted to know what you’re planning on doing.”

He was as cold as ever, but there was something off I couldn’t put my finger on.

“Doing when? I’m stuck here, remember?”

“I’ve been thinking about it, and I don’t think Arkansas is going to be a good fit for Charlie. I think you should go collect him,” he said, staring at me.

I literally swayed on my feet. It was as if he were trying to turn into the absolute worst person he could.

“Are you saying you want to kick him out of that pack too? Even Duncan, as despicable as he was, was willing to keep Charlie.”

“I was assuming you’d want to visit, and I don’t think the pack is a good place for you to be. You need to understand that I’ll probably take another mate, and I don’t want things to be awkward for her.”

I just stared at him. How could I have been so wrong about someone? Even with Duncan, there had been warning signs. With Kicks, I’d always been trying to shelter him from the horror of what I was when I should’ve been running from him .

“Don’t worry. I’ll get him out of your hair as soon as possible. We’ll be out of your cabin, your pack, and nowhere near you. Now get out.” By the time I was done, I was nearly screaming.

He didn’t move, just stood there.

“What is wrong with you? Get out .”

I walked to the door, and he didn’t try to stop me this time. I opened it and still he stood there, unmoving.

“What? What do you want ?” I said.

“Uh…” Didi said from the open door, where she stood with some clothing in her hands. Her mouth gaped open as she looked at Kicks and then me.

“Am I interrupting?” She fumbled with her pile.

“No. He was just leaving.”

Kicks took a step toward the door, pausing beside me for a second. His chest visibly rose and fell before he walked out. I didn’t know if he was checking for Varic’s scent on me or what, and I didn’t care.

I took the clothes from Didi and shut the door on her while she was still gaping.

When I turned, Widow Herbert was standing by the window.

It’s time to get out of here, she said.

“Yeah, it’s past time.”