17. Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen

Remington

I didn’t know how it had happened, but somewhere in the shuffle of the ten of us crowding around the oversized farmhouse table, I ended up in the last empty seat, right beside Hannah. I knew she didn’t want me there. She’d done her best to stay away from me over the last week and had barely acknowledged my presence in her family’s home. But me getting up and asking someone to switch seats wasn’t an option.

First of all, she’d be mad if I caused a scene.

More importantly, I didn’t want to.

The truth of the matter was I didn’t like being ignored by Hannah. It pissed me off even though I knew I didn’t have any right to feel that way. After all, I’d been the one to draw the line between us. And I’d done a whole decade of ignoring.

Under the table, my knee hit Hannah’s. When I didn’t move away as quickly as I should’ve, she reached down and shoved my thigh.

“Stop manspreading,” she uttered through gritted teeth. “It’s rude.”

“Just sitting here eating my dinner,” I murmured back.

On Hannah’s other side, Jesse surveyed us both. “What are you two whispering about? Something boring?”

“We’re not whispering,” she blurted. “Remi is talking to himself.”

Jesse eyed us skeptically. Since our first conversation, we’d shared a few more, and I’d learned this kid was seriously smart. He read nonfiction from the adult section of the library for fun and knew a lot more than the average ten-year-old. He wasn’t buying the made-up story Hannah was trying to sell.

My shoulder bumped Hannah’s as I tipped my head toward Jesse. “Your aunt’s mad because I was taking up space, that’s all.”

“You were taking up too much space , Remington.” She elbowed my bicep, though it was more playful than anything. “You’re doing it again, by the way.”

Elena’s head swiveled our way from across the table. “Are you two fighting?”

“Nope.” Hannah sat up straight. “Just having a chat.”

Memories of sitting at this table as a kid rushed in. Two or three of the Kelly siblings bickering. Their mother asking if they were fighting, them immediately denying it. I’d never let myself be swept up in their troublemaking for fear I wouldn’t be invited back. But seeing how easily I’d been accepted into the fold tonight, those worries seemed far away.

Though, I wasn’t sure they’d like me too much if they found out I’d had my mouth on their beloved daughter’s. Or that I was thinking about doing it all over again while sitting here beside her.

“Remington’s taking up too much space,” Jesse chimed in. “That’s what Aunt Hannah says.”

Elena arched a brow. “Really, Han? You come from a family of giants. You should be used to it.”

Hannah huffed. “I’m sure you enjoy being crowded by Dad.”

“I sincerely doubt it's a real burden to have Remi close to you.” Hannah tensed at her mother’s comment, but Elena didn’t notice and continued. “By the way, Rem, Caleb told us you had an appointment with a doctor last week. How’d that go?”

“Well,” I started, “he said it’s hard to predict the long-term impact of my injury, but I’m doing the right things by taking it easy and avoiding possibly dangerous situations. I’ll go back in a few months for a follow-up.”

“You’ll still be here in a few months?” Hannah asked.

“I intend to be.”

“I bet you’re itching to get back on the road,” she pressed. “I bet you can’t wait to break out of here.”

“Hannah…” Lachlan shook his head at her but didn’t say anything else. The way she slumped in her seat, it didn’t seem necessary.

“Will you be doing that, Remington?” Hannah’s grandmother, Lily, asked. “Once you have clearance, will you be returning overseas?”

“I don’t know. I’m at a crossroads at the moment, not sure what either direction holds.”

“There are plenty of things to photograph in the US,” Elena added. “You could spend the rest of your life capturing beauty.”

“It’s important to document the sad things,” Jesse chimed in. “But Grandma’s right. The beautiful things are just as important.”

“I agree.” I caught Caleb’s eye across the table. “Your son is something else. You know that, right?”

He nodded. “Amazes me every day.”

Jesse beamed. “Ms. Clark, the librarian, says I should have her job because I know the books just as well as her and the county could get away with paying me in candy to save money.”

That got a laugh from just about everyone, even Hannah, but as soon as I looked at her, she bit down on her bottom lip and focused on her plate.

Now that she wasn’t talking to me, not even bickering, I wanted it back. If she’d allowed it, I would’ve asked her about the rough time she’d gone through recently. I might’ve even asked how she’d become so close to Graham. I was deeply curious where Hannah Kelly was concerned, but she wasn’t giving anything away.

Seeing how she was with her family only added to it. The Kellys had always been tight, and not a single one bit their tongue when they had an opinion, but Hannah was a little cyclone, sweeping down over each of them to leave little doses of teasing, encouragement, advice, and commiseration. I’d always wanted to be an official member of this family, and that hadn’t changed, but I now had a hankering for Cyclone Hannah to sweep over me, and that was brand new.

Lily and Connell took over the conversation the rest of the meal, recounting the countries they’d been to and friends they’d made. When Connell got talking about taking Lily dancing in the disco, he looked a lot younger than his seventies, and Lily blushed like a new bride. Which, in a way, I guessed she was.

Hannah’s grandparents had been divorced when I’d first started coming to the ranch. Lily had lived in California while Connell had been right here. I didn’t know what had happened to tear them apart or how they’d managed to come back together. Lily just showed up one day and hadn’t left Connell’s side since.

As a kid, I hadn’t been able to grasp the magnitude of these events. Looking at them now, remembering Lily’s absence from this table for a lot of years, I was starting to get it.

I leaned into Hannah, bumping her shoulder. “Your grandparents are a whole lot of good, aren’t they?”

Her brow furrowed as her gaze slid to me. “What?”

“Them, together,” I murmured. “It’s not just good for them. It’s the entire family, whole again. I feel it. Don’t you?”

She rubbed her lips together and stared at me for so long I didn’t think she'd respond. Then her gaze flicked to Lily and Connell. They were laughing, their hands joined on the table, their faces flushed with life and contentment.

“They are a whole lot of good,” she agreed quietly. “That’s what can happen with second chances. Fences mended, hearts repaired.”

The double meaning was clear. She wasn’t just talking about her grandparents.

“Funny, I don’t remember you being particularly forgiving, sweetheart,” I rumbled as close to her ear as I could get without my lips brushing her skin.

“Especially since I don’t think I have any reason to be.”

Her chair ground against the wood floor as she shoved back from the table with sudden force. Everyone stopped what they were doing, heads whipping in her direction.

She waved a dismissive hand. “Sorry. I’ll be back. Excuse me.”

Dinner went on, but Hannah didn’t return until plates were being cleared. She immediately pitched in with the other Kelly kids while Jesse got the privilege of loading the dishwasher, which he did meticulously. Hannah tried to sneak a dish in herself, but he grabbed it from her, lining it up where he wanted it.

She ruffled his hair, and he promptly smoothed it out, grinning back at his aunt. It was cute. They were cute. I found myself chuckling as I observed them from the other side of the kitchen.

Caleb came to stand beside me, watching the scene. “Feels like old times, doesn’t it?”

“It does. Strange how fast it happens, becoming part of the fabric of this town. Didn’t think I’d fit here anymore.”

He raised a brow, reminding me of his mother. “You think you fit now?”

I shook my shoulders and arms out, flexing my hands. “Feels like I could. The question is: do I want to? And that, I do not know.”

“Hmmm. You ever find a place that fit you better?”

“That wasn’t what I was looking for, Cay.”

He made a rumbling sound and turned to me, his arms crossed over his thick chest. “And that wasn’t what I asked.”

The places I’d called home base over the years flashed across my brain like a slideshow: Chicago, Prague, New York, Seoul. Cities I’d liked, had spent months at a time, formed friendships, relationships, a life in, but I couldn’t say any part of me missed them, and I’d sure as hell never stopped to wonder how I’d weave through those particular tapestries.

“No. Never found it,” I admitted.

He clapped me on the shoulder. “That makes me sad for you, Rem. Maybe it’s time.”

I sucked in a deep breath, the scent of home filling my lungs from corner to corner. When I exhaled, it felt like losing something. “Maybe it is.”