Chapter 30

CHAPTER 30

“Effie, can I ask ye somethin’?”

“Aye, of course.”

“Well, whenever I see ye and Magnus together, ’tis obvious how much in love ye are. How did ye meet and fall in love like that?”

Effie smiled. For a moment, her eyes took on a faraway look. Then she began, “We met at a cèilidh in me local village, and as soon as we were introduced by a friend of mine, I just felt this instant connection with him, like he was special. D’ye ken what I mean?”

“Erm, aye, of course,” Ivy replied, smiling and nodding.

“Our eyes met, he kissed me hand, and I was a goner. It was instant attraction. I just thought about him all the time. I wanted tae be with him all the time. Whenever I saw him, me heart would start racin’, and I just blushed all the time like a fool when he spoke tae me. And when he asked me tae dance, I just knew he was the one. Magnus told me later that it was exactly the same fer him.”

Ivy’s skin prickled as she realized that Effie was describing all the things Liam had made her feel from the first time they had met. “Och, that’s so romantic. And did ye fall in love and get married as soon as ye could?” she asked, a little jealous that romance seemed so easy for other people, unlike her.

But Effie shook her head and said, “Ach, nay, it was nae so easy, Ivy. Ye see, me faither had betrothed me tae another man, the son of a friend of his. His faither was a wealthy merchant, and me faither wanted that useful connection fer his own business.”

Ivy was agog and she listed with rapt attention as Effie went on to explain how their families had disapproved of their relationship and did everything they could to keep them apart. “But whatever they did, we kept on meetin’ in secret, and then, we decided that if we wed in secret and then told out families, they’d havetae accept it.”

“And is that what happened?” Ivy asked, leaning her chin on her hand, entranced by the story.

Effie laughed. “Nae at all. They were furious. The upshot of it was that they punished us by disowning us and we ended up getting’ banished from our own homeland.”

“Banished?!” Ivy exclaimed in astonishment.

“Aye. Anyway we left and sort of wandered around fer a while, strugglin’ tae support ourselves fer we had very little money. I was nae fully trained as a healer back then, and Magnus was trained fer war.”

“I had nae idea things had been so hard fer ye,” Ivy said sympathetically.

“Och, things turned out very well in the end. We ended up in Stewart lands, and one day we happened tae run intae the previous laird, Knox’s faither, out with a huntin’ party. Now, he was good laird and a very kind, wise man. Knox is very like him. Fer some reason, he took pity on us and offered us a home here at Castle Stewart.

“Because of me former experience, I was hired as the old healer’s assistant and trained in the art, and Magnus became a soldier fer the Stewart army. We’ve nae looked back since. And aye, we’re very happy.”

“I never dreamed ye had tae sacrifice so much tae be together.”

“It wasnae a sacrifice, Ivy. I would have done anythin’ tae be with Magnus because I love him so much. Luckily, he feels the same about me. It was worth all the heartache just tae be together.”

“I confess, I’ve always been a wee bit envious of what ye two have. I suppose because I ken I’ll never have anythin’ like that in me life. I’m nay more than me braither’s gamin’ piece.”

Effie pressed her hand and said earnestly, “Please, dinnae say that, Ivy. Dinnae let an unhappy past ruin yer chances of a happy future. Ye deserve tae find true love as well, and anyone with half an eye can see how much Liam cares fer ye.”

“He cares about me, aye, but he daesnae love me, Effie, nae the way Magnus loves ye,” Ivy replied, unable to help sounding despondent.

“I’m nae sure ye’re right about that, lass. Sometimes, people have a hard time admittin’ they’re in love. Somethin’ holds them back, usually somethin’ from their past that shaped who they are. It strikes me that Liam is one of those folks.

“What I dae ken is that love is a very powerful thing. It changes people, makes them dare tae dae things they would never normally dae. Ye ken what they say, the course of true love never runs smooth. Fer some folks, it comes easy. But sometimes, ye havetae fight fer it.”

That same morning, though he had gotten little sleep, Liam made sure to be up and out of his chamber before Ivy awoke. He was so torn up inside, he did not know how to face her.

He went down to the great hall and had some breakfast despite not feeling very hungry. After a desultory meal, he went and spent a couple of hours out at the training grounds sparring with a few other early birds. He had hoped the physical exercise would help take his mind off Ivy but was unsurprised when it failed to work.

Memories of his body entwined with hers and the bliss they had shared the night before replayed in his mind almost constantly. One part of him kept asking why he had gone and left her, while the other told him to be true to his vow to protect himself from hurt. It was exhausting.

He was washing up and changing in the armory when Magnus came in. “Och, so there ye are,” he said, “I’ve been lookin’ fer ye.”

“Oh? What fer?” Liam asked, raking his damp hair back from his forehead and then sitting on a bench to put on his boots.

“Knox wants tae talk tae ye, in his study,” Magnus replied.

“All right, give me a minute, and I’ll follow ye in.” Magnus nodded and left. Liam lingered for a few minutes. He had a nasty feeling he knew what Knox wanted to talk about. It was the inevitable outcome of the stalemate that had developed between Knox and Carson MacAlister.

His suspicions were quickly proved right shortly after he settled into a chair around Knox’s hearth with the laird himself and Magnus seated nearby.

“I want tae tell ye about a decision the council has reached concernin’ our next move with MacAlister and Hamilton,” Knox began, leaning forward in his chair, resting his elbows on his knees as he looked Liam in the eye.

“Aye, I guessed that much. ’Tis overdue. It’s been almost a fortnight since ye made him the offer tae exchange Ivy fer a peace treaty. I take it there’s still been nae response tae that.”

“Nay, nae a word. The only thing ye could call a response was Gael’s attack on Cragiemuir village last week, and what happened yesterday eve at the chapel,” Knox told him. “So, based on that, the council thinks there’s only one road left tae go down, and I agree.”

“Aye, and what’s that?” Liam asked, though he thought he knew the answer already.

“Well, ’tis radical, and it could dae one of two things. It could kick off a real

war, or it could force a peace. But one thing it will dae fer sure is save Ivy from havin’ tae marry Gael Hamilton.”

Liam’s heart plummeted to his boots, for he knew then he had correctly guessed what his friend was about to tell him. He nodded, trying to maintain a casual facade.

“’Tis obvious now that Ivy was tellin’ the truth. The only reason Carson is concerned about gettin’ her back is because he needs her tae wed Hamilton. And the reason fer it is that when she does, Hamilton’s army and resources will be at his disposal. He would have attacked us long ago if Ivy hadnae spoiled his plans by runnin’ away on her weddin’ day.”

“Aye, but we thought as much anyway,” Liam replied. ’Tis why he’s been playin’ on Gael’s lust fer power, eggin’ him on tae attack yer villages and try and force ye tae give her up. Gael must be getting’ pretty desperate too if he’s prepared tae send his men on tae Stewart land and try tae abduct Ivy as he did yesterday.”

“Exactly, me friend. But there’s one way tae ensure Carson never gets his hands on Gael’s forces, which would reduce the chances of him bein’ able tae raise enough troops tae launch a full-scale attack on the castle.”

With his heart clenched, Liam waited for him to say the words.

“Someone else has tae marry Ivy.”

Time passed slowly, accompanied by the crackling of the fire in the hearth. Eventually, he heard himself say coolly, “That makes sense.”

“The question is,” Magnus interjected, looking him square in the eyes, “who?”

“I’ll marry her if I have tae,” Knox said, his blue eyes piercing as he kept them fixed on Liam’s face. “If she’ll agree tae it, of course.”

Liam felt like he had been punched in the belly, but through an act of sheer willpower, he hid it. Or at least, he thought he did. “It would certainly protect her and might even save her life,” he heard himself say, his voice surprisingly even, considering the storm now raging inside him.

He became aware that his friends were both watching him expectantly, their eyes silently urging him to say what they all knew: that he should be the one to wed Ivy.

He knew he had given himself away in a thousand little ways. They had teased him about his feelings for Ivy over and over. And every time he had denied there was anything between them. Since last night, that was more of a lie than ever, which only added to his confusion.

The air of tense expectancy in the room made it obvious they had imagined he would leap at the chance of marrying Ivy and, as the moments ticked by, were growing increasingly puzzled by his silence. But neither Knox nor Magnus had any idea about his longstanding vow never to marry. He saw no point in trying to explain it to them. They would not understand. But neither did they understand why he had not seized this opportunity to ask beautiful, clever, funny, brave Ivy MacAlister to be his wife.

He felt an urgent need to settle the matter and leave the room as quickly as possible. “Aye, that’s that natural conclusion. I’m sure if ye ask her, Knox, she’ll see the sense in it and agree tae wed ye,” he said, rising to his feet. “Now, if ye dinnae need me fer anythin’ else, I have me duties tae attend tae.”

He felt their eyes on him as they stared in obvious disbelief. Finally, Knox nodded and said, “If ye have nay more tae say on the subject, then I’ll nae keep ye any longer. Maybe we’ll see ye at noon fer a bite tae eat, eh?”

“Aye, maybe.” It took all he had to saunter casually from the room.

Out in the hallway, he strode off, hardly knowing where he was heading. Even though he had seen it coming, the thought of Ivy marrying Knox, marrying anyone one else, was like a knife twisting in his heart.

But the same old fear held strong. I can never offer Ivy marriage , he told himself, nae if I want her tae be protected. Marrying Knox will keep her safe. ’Tis fer the best, and I just havetae get used tae it.

Ivy was taking a walk in the castle gardens when she heard someone coming up behind her. On edge since the events at the chapel, she whirled around to see who was following her. When she saw it was Knox, a wave of relief washed over her, and she smiled at him in greeting.

“Hello, there, Ivy. Takin’ in some fresh air, I see,” he said, returning her smile as he went up to her.

“Aye, I got bored just lyin’ in bed,” she admitted, resuming her walk. The laird fell in beside her, his hands clasped behind his back.

“We havenae spoken since ye got attacked. How’s yer arm?” he asked.

“Ach, a wee bit sore. But Effie’s just changed the dressin’ fer me, and she says ’tis healin’ up nice and clean.”

“Excellent. ’Tis good tae see ye feelin’ strong enough take a wee walk.”

“There’s naethin’ wrong with me,” she told him. “I dunno what Liam’s told ye, but I’m nae an invalid, if that’s what ye mean.”

“Nay, I can see that,” he hastily agreed. Silence fell between them as they continued walking. After a time, Ivy sensed tension in him, as though he wanted to say something yet was hesitating.

“Is there somethin’ ye wanted, Knox?” she asked eventually.

“Aye, I wanted tae speak tae ye about somethin’, and I’m nae quite sure how

tae go about it.”

She gave a small laugh. “That daesnae sound much like ye. I’ve seldom seen ye lost fer words.”

“Hmm, well, ’tis a delicate matter.”

Fear gripped Ivy. Is this it, she wondered, panic rising inside her. He’s gonnae tell me he’s decided tae hand me over tae Gael tae stop the attacks?

“What is it?” she forced herself to ask calmly.

“Ivy, the council have come tae the conclusion that there is one sure way of protectin’ ye from yer braither and Hamilton and, hopefully, helpin’ the clan avoid an all-out war. This way, Carson willnae have Gael’s army or his resources at his disposal, and he needs them tae be able tae attack us,” he explained.

She breathed a sigh of relief. “Och, I thought ye were just gonnae tell me ye were sendin’ me back tae marry Gael.”

“Nay, I was gonnae ask ye what ye think of marryin’ me instead,” he answered bluntly. She stopped in her tracks, and so did he. She stared at him in shock. “Let me explain,” he went on. “I can tell the proposal comes as a shock tae ye, but in the circumstances, I hope ye can see it makes sound, practical sense.

“As Lady Stewart, I could offer ye the protection and power of me clan against yer braither and Hamilton. Of course, I ken ’tis nae the romantic proposal ye’d probably like. It would be a strategic alliance. But it would keep ye safe, and it could save a lot of lives.”

Thoughts of Liam raced through her head as she stood staring mutely up at Knox. She thought she could see sympathy in his eyes and had the strange feeling he could read her mind. Somehow, he knew that if there was anyone she wanted to marry at all, it was Liam. But it came to her with cold painful clarity that Liam did not love her, and he was not going to ask her to be his wife. He had shown that quite clearly by his actions.

“I can see I’ve taken ye by surprise, but ye need nae answer me now. Think on it. I plan tae make a formal proposal tae ye tonight at dinner, but as I say, I dinnae expect an answer yet. But ’tis important tae let everyone ken I’ve asked ye. Is that all right?” he asked solicitously.

“That’s a very generous offer, Knox. Are ye sure about it?” she asked eventually. “Would ye nae rather marry someone ye love?”

He shrugged and gave a small smile. “That’s nae happened yet. This way makes good sense fer all of us, but I’ll nae force ye intae it if ye’re nae willin’. I’m content tae wait fer yer decision.”

She thought for a few moments. However painful it was that Liam did not want her, she knew she had to accept it. Knox was offering her a home, safety, and protection. She would be Lady Stewart. In truth, it was more than she could ever have hoped for.

She looked into his bright blue eyes and said, “I’ll think about it, as ye say.”

“Grand. Ye’d best keep it tae yersel’ fer the moment, but be prepared fer me proposal at dinner, all right?”

“All right. I’ll be ready. Thank ye, Knox,” she told him stoically, trying to sound grateful, though she could feel tears welling up inside her.

“I’ll see ye at dinner then,” he said, his eyes full of kindness.

She nodded. “Aye, at dinner.”

With that, he departed. She held her emotions in check as she walked on until she came to a secluded arbor. There, she sat on a stone bench, put her head in her hands, and let the tears of heartbreak flow.