2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Thea

I sometimes dream of a man I have never met. Sometimes I can feel him watching me in the shadows of Exile as I explore the dead woods. There is nothing in particular that I can recall about his features when I wake up from my dreams. Only the piercing gold of his eyes that watch me like I’m a sight to behold remain clear in my mind during the days. I don’t remember his words, face, or anything but those eyes.

I had been in a fog-like haze of confusion for months. I still wasn’t sure what was causing it. It was like my mind was trying to claw its way out of a dark cave to tell me something. I was always so confused when I woke up in Exile, which made no sense. I have been here for years.

Even Sybil and the twins were acting strange. When Sybil burst into tears at the sight of me that morning so long ago, it made me feel like I did something wrong. She never told me why the sight of me coming out of my room that morning had made her sob, and I didn’t push it. Because even though I couldn’t remember anything, I knew something had happened to me. I was different. I felt different.

I searched the grounds of Exile at night because I felt like I had lost something important. I felt incomplete... lost. Something was missing, and it haunted me with loneliness and heartbreak. It was the reason I was currently sitting in the darkening woods near the shadow border. I was always drawn to this spot of the border, and sometimes I thought of jumping through it, but I knew what would happen if I did. I would die. So, I sat here and waited for something—anything—to happen. It never did.

My eyes looked up at the starless sky, and I sighed heavily. I wished to see the stars and the moon again. The hot, sticky air clung to me, and I wished I could cool off somehow; even the creek was warm. But maybe it would be enough to make me feel clean. I stood and walked farther into the woods. A few yards into the tree line, the wide creek met me. The sound of the rippling water soothed my aching mind.

I stripped off my clothing and laid my bow next to my viper-handled dagger. My eyes lingered on the blade. The vipers coiled their way around the handle, and their eyes bored into me like they knew my secrets. I walked into the creek and sighed at the comfort it brought, even though it was warmer than I would’ve preferred.

My body was less tense as I lay in the deepest part of it, floating on my back. My eyes closed with exhaustion. My days were not taxing by any means, but I was always exhausted. I felt myself drifting in and out of sleep as I lay there, but I didn’t get up and leave. I was too relaxed to get out. My body relaxed for the first time in weeks. I was always so tense, like something bad was going to happen.

★★?★★

When I finally opened my eyes, I was confused by the landscape around me. I sat up quickly when I realized that I was no longer in the creek of Exile. scanned the shoreline of some sort of hot spring I was in. Something about it seemed familiar. I heard him before I saw him lurking in the shadows. My hand hurried to grab the viper dagger.

“No need for that, my love.” His deep voice twisted around my heart and squeezed it.

“Do not call me that,” I hissed at the shadowy figure. He laughed softly. I remembered I wasn't wearing clothing. I looked over my skin and paused at the tattoos I had. Pretty crimson-colored flowers and trees surrounded the letter ‘C’ above my heart. No matter how much I tried, I couldn’t remember how I had gotten them. I couldn’t remember anything before a few months ago, but I shared that secret with no one.

“Sorry, it’s a habit.” He paused for a long moment, and I thought he had left. “What a nice hot spring... Why are you dreaming of it?”

I glanced around, and something familiar struck me, but I couldn’t exactly say what.

“Come out where I can see you, coward.”

“I love it when you call me that,” his deep voice sighed.

My heart picked up speed. Was he flirting with me? I guess I was naked and alone, but this was a dream; he couldn’t hurt me here. A moment later I could make out his silhouette in the darkness at the edge of the spring. He wore a large, hooded cloak. My muscles relaxed as soon as his golden eyes shone brightly. The darkness that lingered inside of me hummed in approval.

“Is that better?”

“No. I want to see your face.”

“Hmm.” He paced slowly at the shoreline. “That’s probably a bad idea.” His voice was almost playful, and I liked it.

“Why? Are you ugly or something?”

He laughed so loudly that I found myself smiling at this stranger in front of me. Something about the noise felt familiar and comforting.

“I think you might like what you see and fall hopelessly in love with me.” There was a hint of sadness in his voice.

I scoffed and rolled my eyes.

“Aren’t you a cocky son of a bitch.”

“Very well, but I did warn you, little viper.”

The nickname made my chest heavy with something I couldn’t explain. I watched as he slipped the hood from his face, but he didn’t stop there. He slipped his clothing off and slipped into the spring with me. I still couldn’t see his face as he sat in the water by the dark edge.

“Are you going to stab me with that?”

“Depends,” I answered him, even though my grip on my dagger was loose. He nodded slowly. He did not make me feel scared; his presence made me feel safe. Slowly, I sank into the water to cover my naked body from him, but I gripped the viper-handled dagger in my hand just in case he tried any funny business. I stared directly at him as he slowly made his way out of the shadows.

I expected something far more grotesque than what he showed me. Pretty golden eyes stared directly into my green ones. His dark hair was chaotic, and his straight nose led to a kissable mouth pulled into a cocky smirk.

He was devastatingly handsome, and he knew it. My eyes drifted over his muscled shoulders and chest, where all these tattoos decorated him, but my eyes were drawn to one. The letter ‘T’ with a viper coiled around it sat above his heart. Something in my mind fought and clawed to release, but whatever the tattoo triggered never surfaced.

“Are you hopelessly in love with me now?” He teased me.

I shook my head to stop my gawking. My body begged me to look at him again, but I fought the urge with everything I possessed. I still didn’t know who this man was. I should be wary of him always lurking in my dreams, but maybe he was just a figment of my imagination. Maybe my broken and confused mind mustered up his existence, so I wasn’t so lonely.

My eyes drifted back to him. Nothing about him made me feel scared. If anything, I felt like I needed to be near him. The darkness inside me urged me forward at the thought of touching him. The man watched me in a way that had my chest tightening. He looked like he missed me.

My darkness urged me forward again, only so much more persistent this time that I had no choice but to listen. Turning, I set down my dagger and looked at him again. I took a small step toward him and saw that it surprised him.

“You aren’t real, are you? My lonely mind made you up,” I said as I reached forward and felt his warm skin under my fingertips. He felt real. He should feel real, though, if I made him up. When my eyes looked up, he was staring at me. Any sane fae would have stopped my touch if this were real.

My fingers traced the ‘T’ over his heart, which was beating extremely fast under my touch. I moved my hands to his face and felt the stubble on his chin scrape against my skin. His golden eyes swarmed with flecks of black, making me shiver with anticipation. The man lifted his arm and slowly brushed the hair from my face, but he didn’t stop touching me. His hand slid to the back of my neck and pulled me forward hesitantly. He paused an inch from my mouth, so I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his. It was like a tension I didn’t know inside of me snapped at the feel of his mouth on mine.

I found what I had been missing.

His big hands yanked me, so I was flush against him. Our wet skin rubbed effortlessly against each other as he deepened the kiss. All thoughts disappeared, and so did the confusion that had plagued me for months. I felt nothing, and it was pure bliss. My arms wrapped around his neck so I could pour everything I could into the kiss. A low hum of appreciation escaped him.

His hands rubbed over my back and thighs like he couldn’t help it.

“My love,” he spoke with a sadness that had me pulling back and looking over him. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

I nodded because there was no hesitation on my part. It was the only encouragement he needed. His fingers traced down my stomach before reaching where I needed to feel him the most, as his mouth devoured mine. Noises fell from me without permission as the pit in my stomach became heavier and heavier.

“Such pretty noises, little viper,” he growled so possessively I locked my stare to his. “Hearing what I do to you may be the closest to the heavens I may ever get.”

His mouth skimmed along the skin of my neck and bit me so softly that my orgasm ripped through me so violently that I wondered if the stars above could hear.

“You’re so fucking perfect,” he sighed as my mouth found his. My body filled with a need I couldn’t explain. My lust coiled tightly within me like a venomous viper waiting to strike its prey, and right now this man was my target. A surge of possessiveness cascaded over me in a wave as I took control of our positions. My hands pushed against him, so his back was leaning against the side of the spring. His golden eyes changed to a darkness, which reminded me of the shadows he hid in. I smiled at him as I lifted my hips and sank onto him without warning. My greedy eyes watched him as his eyes clenched tightly and his hands squeezed handfuls of my flesh. His head fell back to rest against the shore of the hot spring. My movements slowed when he opened his eyes and stared at me.

The look called to something deep within me, something dark. His features were fixed in hard lines as he watched me move faster and faster.

“How’s your love doing?” I found myself asking.

A feral growl escaped him as he wrapped his fingers in my hair and pulled me down, so I was face-to-face with him.

“You’re doing such a good job, my love. You look so pretty taking what you want from me.”

“Fuck,” I whispered as his words soaked into me.

“Let me hear you, Thea. Let the realm hear you. Let the gods above know how fucking good we are together. Let them know that they can’t keep you from me.” His hips thrust up into me at such a delicious pace that my breath caught in my throat.

His mouth possessed mine, his tongue dominating me with the same dominance of his thrusts. It was too much. It felt too good. Whimpering pleas fell from me as I pulled back.

“You’re mine,” he declared as his hands squeezed my hips tightly. “Only mine. No one ever gets to see you like this. No one else gets to make these pretty noises fall from your perfect mouth. You belong to me, do you understand?”

“Yes,” I cried out. “I’m yours.”

“Good girl.” He clenched his jaw tightly, and the tempo of his hips increased, pounding into me so perfectly that another orgasm tore through me.

“Please…”

“You wanted it, my love, so you’ll take it until I’m done with you.”

My eyes squeezed so tightly as I called my orgasm into the dark star-painted sky above us just as his release crashed into him. When my breathing slowed, I looked down at him, smiling.

“That was…” I swallowed as emotions bubbled up and tears filled my eyes. “It felt so right.” I didn’t know how to say what I was thinking or feeling.

He leaned forward and kissed me softly before hugging me.

“I love you,” he whispered.

As I leaned back to see his handsome face, my dream shifted to something more sinister. It didn’t feel like a dream anymore. I lifted my hands and saw them coated in blood. My heart pounded as I glanced around the hot spring, only to realize the water was red. When I looked at my golden-eyed man, his eyes were black and vacant. Then the large wound on his neck caught my attention.

He was dead.

I fell off him and tried to crawl out of the hot spring, but his hand grabbed my ankle at the last moment, and he dragged me back toward him.

“Are you going to let me die, my love?” he asked with blood seeping down him. I closed my eyes tightly, wanting to wake up from this nightmare.

★★?★★

When I tried to breathe, water filled my lungs. Panic settled into me as I tried to find the surface of the water. Dark shadows wrapped around me and pulled me up as I gasped for air.

I looked around for the man, but he wasn’t there. I was in the creek of Exile again, and it made confusion crash into my mind. I crawled onto the shoreline and tried to catch my breath. My mind flashed to my dream, but the more I tried to remember what the man looked like, the less I could see.

There was nothing about the dream I could remember except the man dying. It was as if I could see his face but not see any of the details. My chest ached painfully as flashes of blood coating my hands hit me.

Are you going to let me die, my love?

My dreams had never done that. I could never remember what he said to me when I woke. So why could I remember this one line? I shook away the overwhelming sense of grief that was taking over my chest. It was just a nightmare.

I frowned at the starless sky above me before rolling over and getting dressed, then heading home. That feeling of missing something overtook me again, but it was worse than before I fell asleep.

I frowned slightly as I stepped into the small house that belonged to Sybil and I. The twins were there, and I greeted them with a small smile.

“We were getting worried about you,” Kaz said with a frown.

“I went for a swim, sorry.”

They all looked over me oddly, but whatever they were questioning was never spoken out loud. I picked up a piece of bread and ate it slowly to not upset my stomach. We did not have a lot of supplies left in the small town we were trapped in. Soon we would all die from starvation or sickness.

“We should walk the border tomorrow and see if anything has changed,” Kai said toward me. His demeanor and tone were odd, but I agreed. My eyes lingered on the blackbird elite magic mark he had.

“Sounds good. We’ll meet at nightfall, so others don’t see us.” I paused for a moment, wondering if I should bother asking questions. “What elite magic do you have? ”

“We shift into ravens,” Kaz said. Interesting.

He shared a look with his twin and Sybil.

“Were you two the only kids in your family?” I asked.

“No, we had a sister.” Kaz frowned like he didn’t like this line of questioning. Shouldn’t any of this be familiar? I should know these things, but they didn’t ask me why I was asking about things that I should already know.

“She didn’t have elite magic?”

“No, she did.” Kaz stared at me oddly. “She died, though.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

My eyes drifted to each one of them to see their reactions. It was clear by the way they glanced at each other that they thought something was wrong with me. I wanted to ask what it was, but something told me they wouldn’t share. Every time I asked why we were trapped here, I was met with an awkward silence. At one point someone said the Crimson kingdom was at fault, but Sybil was quick to shut that theory down. She didn’t give an alternative explanation. She said she just knew that it wasn’t Crimson, and I believed her.

Although I did not know the names of the kingdoms or who they were, so why would it matter to me? I didn’t remember anything, but no one else seemed to remember much either. After I ate, I excused myself to my room. I could hear the harsh whispers coming from the three of them as I left, but I kept going. My room was so small, but something like comfort filled me when I was alone in there.

I stripped off my clothes and lay on the makeshift bed. My eyes glanced up at the crack in the roof. The mud was falling apart, and it would need to be fixed soon. My eyes drifted shut as I tried to recall anything about the man I dreamed of.