Chapter 33

33

Julie

Dinner date at Marquis, the downstairs restaurant, and Julie had something to confess. Though she wasn't quite sure how to work around to it, or if she should.

Thankfully, it didn't take Connor long to bring it up. Once they'd sat down and ordered, once the server had whisked away, he looked across the table at her very seriously. He had dressed up for the date in a maroon button-down shirt that strained across his broad shoulders and chest but fit him well enough, it didn't look like buttons were going to pop off or anything. Julie rather liked it.

"I have something to tell you," he said. It was clear he was nervous but determined. Even though she was already pretty sure she knew what he was going to say, Julie nodded.

"Okay."

"Your mom came in for an appointment with me today." His gaze was on her face, studying her reaction.

She smiled at him, reaching across the table with one hand, palm up. Connor slid his fingers into hers.

"Sandra called me when she got there and let me listen to part of your conversation."

Connor blinked.

"Dammit, I should have known she was up to something. So, it's okay?" He looked at her plaintively. "Your mom had a good session today. I'd like to keep helping her."

Because he wanted to help anyone who needed it or because he wanted to make sure Julie's mom kept liking him? And did it really matter as long as he held firm on the lines he'd drawn in the sand today?

Not really.

Her mom could use the help, and she felt reassured knowing that she was in Connor's hands. Much better than John's. If Connor couldn't help, he would say so. He wouldn't push his own agenda to salve his pride.

"It's okay with me as long as you keep handling her like you did today." It was a huge measure of trust that she was putting in him. It wasn't like Sandra was going to be able to spy every time her mom came in. "I don't want her going to you behind my back with things about me or us."

"I will definitely not talk to your mom about you at all while she's seeing me." A sudden grin lit up his face, and he squeezed her hand. "Though I hope you can make an exception for her telling me childhood stories about you."

Julie groaned, leaning back in her seat. "Oh God, which ones did she tell you?"

"I rather liked the one about how you ran through the house as a toddler yelling ‘naked baby, naked baby' when your dad's boss was over for dinner."

Groaning, Julie tried to tug her hand away from his so she could bury her face in her palms, but he wasn't letting go. So, she buried her face in one palm, searing it with the heat from her cheeks.

"I can't believe she told you that story." Her mom had waited until she was engaged to John to tell him that story.

Did it mean she trusted Connor more? Or had that been an attempt to scare him off somehow? Julie wasn't sure how to parse her mother's behavior sometimes.

"I thought it was cute." He grinned at her.

Before she could make a retort, a shadow fell over their table, and they both looked up to see Olivia. She smiled at them, but it was more of a grimace than a smile.

"Hey, I'm so sorry to interrupt, but we've got an issue for this weekend. Sherry's mom fell today, and she wasn't too badly injured, but she can't be alone for at least a week, and Sherry and Mark were supposed to perform on Friday." Olivia shot Julie an apologetic look. "It's your week."

Olivia, Julie, and Law did a rotation of who was ‘back-up' each weekend in case of emergency, and this just happened to be Julie's weekend. Before Connor, she would have drafted one of the submissive employees who had a night off and done a platonic scene with them. Maybe used a toy or something to add a sexual element.

But now she did have Connor.

He'd appeared slightly confused at first, but when Olivia said it was Julie's week, light dawned in his eyes. She had told him about it before.

"Can you give us a minute to talk about it?" she asked Olivia.

"Of course, just text me sometime tonight if you can." Olivia shot her another apologetic look. "Sorry again for interrupting, but since I just got the call, and I was walking through the dining room, and you were here…"

"No, I get it. This gives us an opportunity to talk about it." Julie smiled, giving Olivia a little wave as she walked away. Her smile faltered as she returned her focus to Connor.

John would never… and he would have been thoroughly insulted that she would think he would.

But Connor wasn't John.

Taking a deep breath, Julie tried to quell the nerves that were churning her stomach. Connor wasn't John. This wasn't going to be a fight just because she was going to ask him if he would perform with her at Marquis.

"Got any plans for Friday?" she asked, trying to make a joke of it.

"I don't, no," he said slowly. He was thinking.

He wasn't saying yes immediately.

He also wasn't blowing up at her for thinking it was even a possibility.

Some of her nerves settled a little. Connor wasn't John—Connor was, in fact, the opposite of John in a lot of ways. He'd described himself as a people pleaser. There was every chance Connor would say yes even though he didn't want to, just because he felt like he should or because he felt like she needed him.

"You don't have to do this," she said quickly. "I think Olivia just wanted to give us the chance if we wanted to. We could see if she and Luke could do it if you're not ready. Or Law and Iris. Or I can call around and see if someone else can be back-up?—"

Connor squeezed her hand before she could ramble on, throwing out any more ideas.

"We should do it."

Her verbal vomit grinding to a halt, Julie took a deep breath.

"Are you sure? We really don't have to. There's time to find someone else."

"I want to." He smiled at her. "It'll be fun. I've never performed at Marquis before." He paused thoughtfully before adding on. "But… if we could wait for you to peg me until after the show is over. I don't think I want my first time for that to be in front of everyone."

Julie laughed, surprised and maybe even a little shocked, but also gratified to hear that he was open to being pegged afterward. If that was what he wanted, she was happy to reward him with it.

"Of course."

Connor

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" Julie asked, frowning as she helped Connor into a leather harness with straps that wrapped around his chest and shoulders. It wasn't the same as Shibari but hugged him in a similar manner, helping him to relax. It was like being held by her, even though she wasn't touching him. The back was left mostly exposed, with one long horizontal strap across the center. There were also two vertical straps, set at an angle, coming down from around his neck. In addition to the harness, she'd already plugged him with a rather large, long plug to prepare him for later.

On his bottom half, a leather pouch contained his cock, leaving him otherwise completely naked. Strings attached to the pouch worked like a thong, so she'd be able to reach his ass.

"I'm okay with this," he said immediately, amused.

This was the fifth time she'd asked over the past twenty-four hours, as if she kept expecting him to suddenly change his mind.

"We can always grab Olivia and Luke from her office if you decide you're not."

The harness was now strapped down, and Connor turned to face her. They were in the backstage area—the green room, even though there was not a single thing in it that was green—which was a small, well-lit room furnished with a single couch, two mirrors, a shelf in front of the mirror hanging on the wall, and two chairs in front of the shelf. They had a room reserved for the evening—the Dungeon Room—though Connor doubted they would be using the front part of that room by the time they were done with the show. They'd left most of their things in there but then had come to the green room for the finishing touches.

He didn't have to look down as far as he sometimes did to meet her gaze. Tonight she was wearing thigh-high boots that laced up the sides, a short black skirt that was like a second skin over her ass, and a bright green corset that had a deep V between her breasts, pushing them together into far more substantial cleavage than she normally had.

Taking her face in his hands, Connor lowered his head, so they were nearly nose-to-nose, looking deep into her eyes.

"I promise, nothing will make me happier tonight than submitting to you for this performance… other than being pegged by you afterward. I love you, Julie." He grinned as her mouth dropped open, then snapped shut, and then opened again.

She was at a loss for words. He didn't need them said back. That wasn't why he'd said it.

Heck, he hadn't known he was going to say it until the words were coming out of his mouth.

The rush of emotion when he'd realized how determined she was to protect him, even from himself, to make sure that he wasn't going to do anything he didn't really want to do even if he wouldn't say it immediately… He'd already known he was falling, had known for a while, but this was the moment when he'd realized he'd fallen.

"You do?" she asked after a moment when she'd finally found her voice again.

"I do." His thumb swept along her cheek.

Reaching up for him, she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"I love you, too."

"You don't have to say it just because I did."

Mistress Julie's eyes narrowed as she glared at him.

"Are you calling me a liar, Connor?"

Well, shit.

"No, Ma'am."

"Are you saying I don't know my own feelings?"

"Definitely not saying that, Ma'am."

"So, you believe that I love you?" A smile toyed at the edges of her lips. She was enjoying herself.

Connor smiled back, happy warmth spreading through his chest.

"Yes, Mistress."

Fuck. She loved him.

And they were going truly public with their relationship. With his submission. Then he was going to give himself to her, fully. His cock, already half-hard, began to lift to full height as she went up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips against his.

The kiss had barely started when it was interrupted by a knock on the door and the sound of the door opening before they had a chance to answer.

"Hey, you two, five-minute warning," Olivia said.

"Thank you, five," Julie replied with a sigh, pulling away from Connor. He frowned at her in confusion, and she laughed. "That's how you acknowledge that you heard the warning… by repeating the number back. Angel taught us all the backstage protocol."

Connor nodded. "Got it. Thank you, five."

Chuckling, Olivia closed the door behind her, giving them privacy again.

Julie ran her hands up his chest. "Ready?"

"Yes, Mistress."