Chapter 19

Backdraft

The next few hours blur by in a haze of drinking and distraction. Yet, despite the carefree indulgence of the club, a small voice inside me still can't believe Zoey left with Cal and Brie. She's out there getting a taste of their fancy high-society life. The rational part of my brain knows she deserves to explore her options and see what else is out there beyond the club. Then there's the darker side. The primal, possessive side I can't control. That part of me is going crazy with the thought of her slipping away into a world that I can't follow. A world where I don't belong.

My heart is thrashing and clawing against my ribcage at the thought of Zoey. I've never felt this way about a woman before. She's gotten under my skin and seeped into my veins. The thought of losing her sends me reeling, a primal scream building in my chest as I imagine a world without her. She's mine, damn it. I claimed her. We belong together.

Aero stops next to me, his tall frame casting a shadow over me as he leans in next to my seat at the bar. His steel-blue eyes bore into mine, cutting through the facade I've put up. "You good, brother?"

I meet his gaze, feeling vulnerable under his intense scrutiny. He knows I'm falling apart. "I'm good, Prez." I quickly conceal it, forcing a smile that feels like a lie. "Just got a lot on my mind, that's all."

He studies me for a moment longer, then with a slow nod, he breaks eye contact. "Alright then. Time for Church."

"Right behind you." I know I need to get my head in the game. Our club comes first. Our chapter is still new so there's a lot to be done to secure our position in this town and make sure we prosper. I can't allow myself to be distracted by this situation with Zoey. I swallow back the rest of my beer, wiping the foam from my mouth with the back of my hand and follow his lead. I have no choice but to trust that Cal and his men will protect her, even though I have no confidence in anyone but myself when it comes to her safety.

By the time I breach the door to Church, the rest of the club is already gathered inside. The thick scent of leather and cigarettes hang in the air. Their loud voices and laughter reverberates off the stone walls. Grizzly winces, clutching his side where the bandages cover his bullet wounds.

"Take it easy on me, boys," he chuckles. "I'm still healing up over here."

"Alright, alright, settle down. Let's get down to business." Aero's commanding voice booms over the rowdy chatter of the crowded room as he stands at the head of the long wooden table. The flickering neon Royal Bastards MC logo on the wall casts an eerie red glow over his face. His commanding eyes scan the faces before him, taking in each member of the Royal Bastards MC, Atlantic City Chapter, and the room falls silent. His eyes shift to Grizzly who sits across from him at the opposite end of the table. "First off, it's damn good to have you back, Griz. Those bullets didn't stop you for long."

Grizzly nods with a proud grin, his broad shoulders straightening up in his seat. "Takes more than a few holes to keep me down."

Grizzly, our club's VP, is the only patched member that didn't come to Nashville after me. Aero grounded him after he took a bullet a few weeks ago while helping Surge and Emery extract their revenge on the man that hurt her. He needed time to heal. It's understandable but I realize he's the only one who doesn't know about Zoey. While my claim to her has been kept between Aero and I so far, there's no way the others haven't noticed there was something going on. I haven't spoken to any of them since she left and assume they've all forgotten about her already. Something I can't seem to do, even for a minute.

"Glad to hear it. Now listen up," Aero leans forward, elbows on the table and his hands folded together. "I've been thinking that it's high time we got into some legit business. Expand our reach, bring in steadier cash flow. Royal Road in Nashville gave me an idea."

Curiosity piques around the room as the brothers exchange knowing glances. Low whistles and hoots and hollers fill the air as they start recalling their night of debauchery at Royal Road. Aero's voice rises above the noise, his eyes sparkling with mischief as he speaks, "Picture this, a one-stop vice den. Casino, nightclub, bar, the works. But here's the kicker. We'll have an underground fighting ring too, for the high-stakes gamblers and adrenaline junkies."

"I like it," Grizzly nods, stroking his thick, red beard thoughtfully. "Let us cater to all types. The suits can rub elbows upstairs while the real money moves down below."

"Exactly," Aero points at him. "It'll be classy as hell topside, bring in the big fish. Then we bleed 'em dry in the ring once they're hooked."

Murmurs of approval ripple through the club. Padre rubs his hands together eagerly. "I can already smell the money. When do we start?"

Aero holds up a hand. "I'd like to get moving as soon as possible but we gotta cover the basics first. Hashtag, I need you digging up prime real estate. Somewhere with space and privacy for the underground stuff. Crank, tap your contacts, see about equipment for the casino. Tango and Surge, you're on security detail. We need this place locked up tight."

The brothers nod, mentally shifting gears to tackle their new assignments. This is a big play for the club.

My stomach twists in knots. Stronger than the excitement is the nagging fear that coils in my gut like a venomous snake. I can't keep my mind off Zoey and all the scenarios running through my head. Is she in danger? Does Dominic Cassedy know where she is? Worse than the plaguing thoughts are the whispers of doubt creeping in. Can I make her happy? Can I give her the life she deserves? I'm a scarred, rough-around-the-edges biker. Zoey's so vibrant and full of potential. Maybe... Maybe letting her go is the right thing to do, even if it rips my fucking heart out.

I shake off the intrusive thoughts, trying to refocus on Aero as he lays out more plans. One thing at a time. The club needs me sharp and ready for whatever's coming next. I'll just have to trust that my Little Lamb will return to the fold and make me whole. Right now, I've got business to take care of.

"...the money situation," Rancor's gruff voice penetrates my spiraling thoughts. I drag my attention back to the here and now. "We ain't got the capital for a venture this big."

Pike's lips curl into a snide smirk as he speaks, his thick eyebrows furrowing above his questioning eyes. "What about the fat insurance payout Emery's getting for The Playhouse burning down? That's gotta be a hefty chunk of change."

"No way," Surge shakes his head, protective of his Ol' Lady. "You know she wants to put that towards opening a women's shelter. Help other women who've been through the shit she has."

"Emery's money is her own," Aero says firmly. "The club supports her plans, but we ain't touching those funds. It's all good though, boys." His mouth kicks up in a grin. "We've had an unexpected windfall. Carracci paid up big time for Backdraft rescuing Zoey and returning her safely. Guess the big city alpha keeps his word after all, even if he doesn't like how things played out."

Surprise ripples through the group, along with hearty chuckles and back slaps aimed my way. I accept the accolades vacantly, my mind still reeling. Cal paid the club for my service, even after I claimed her for my own. What does that mean? Is it his way of acknowledging my place in her life? Easing the way for her to stay here with me? I don't fucking know. And I hate not knowing almost as much as I hate that Zoey isn't by my side where I can protect her. Touch her. Breathe her in. The uncertainty is eating me alive.

"...matter, cause we're flush now," Aero is saying as I tune back in again. "Time to get to work, boys. Plans won't make themselves."

Hashtag looks up from his laptop screen and raises a hand. "Ah, about that Prez... Been doing some digging' and most of us ain't gonna qualify for those permits on account of our, shall we say, colorful pasts." He flashes a wry grin.

Aero nods. "I figured as much. No worries, we'll find a way. Always do."

"Even you, Pres?" Tango asks, reminding us that even though we've bonded quickly, there's still a lot we don't know about each other.

A shadow crosses Aero's face and he shakes his head. "Yeah, brother. I did a stint in the cage years back. Ain't no way in hell they'll approve me either."

Shock ripples through the club. Glancing around, it seems like I'm the only one not surprised by his confession. Every one of us ended up in this life walking the line between right and wrong for a reason. Some of us strayed to the wrong side for a while too long.

"Well shit," Rancor mumbles. "Now what?"

Aero leans forward, elbows on the table. "We get creative, is what. Hashtag, see what ideas you can come up with. In the meantime, I'll put out feelers. See if anyone in town owes us enough to let us use their name on the paperwork." Aero stands from his seat at the end of the table, "It should go without saying, I expect all of you to help Emery with whatever she needs for the shelter. We'll reconvene in a couple of weeks. Tonight, let's celebrate Grizzly healing and Backdraft returning in one fucking piece."

Chairs scrape back as my brothers disperse, heading for the bar, the pool tables, and their women. Usually, I'd be right there with them, ready to cut loose. But tonight, I'm not celebrating surviving that blast because all I can think about is a blonde-haired beauty with fire in her eyes and my brand on her skin that's not where she belongs.

Rubbing a hand over the ache in my chest, I wander out to the back deck. The muted thump of music pulses against my back as I stare off at the casino lights in the distance.

"Where are you, Little Lamb?" I murmur into the night. "I'm going insane without you."

But the only reply is the crash of the waves. I take a moment to collect my thoughts. I need to focus on the task at hand, for Zoey, for the club. I'll see her soon enough, and when I do, I'll show her that this life, our life, is where she belongs.

With a heavy sigh, I turn and head back inside to join the others. Tonight we party but tomorrow we start planning our biggest score yet. One that'll not only bring us the legitimacy we need, but also show Zoey that our world can be her world too.