36. Locke

Chapter thirty-six

Locke

I stand on the bridge and smile, remembering that day when we came and watched all the river games. I hadn’t known then how happy I could be. It never crossed my mind that I would give up everything just to have them. Walking away from Derision? It’s not upsetting me at all.

If anything, I feel free. It’s a relief to know I’ll never have to go back to it.

I shiver in the icy wind and stick my hands in my pockets.

I love making music, but I hate the pressure. I hate performing. And gradually, that bled into all forms of musical creation. Now that the control has been dissolved and I’m no longer under Jason’s thumb, I can breathe. Maybe like Finn says, I can have music one day.

And I’ll be free of her.

I glance down at the note in my hands.

Bray wants to meet me here.

I wonder why?

Excitement makes me smile. I do that now. Smile at nothing and for no reason. It’s a whole situation, but I can’t even be upset with it. I want Lia and Ryn to come and visit. I’m going to call Raider and Kelly tomorrow. Perhaps Bethany can bring her pack to come visit?

I lift my hand to the bite mark on my neck. I can feel Erin’s emotions spiking through the bond, but I haven’t figured out what it all means yet. Fuck, I miss her already. My complete codependence on my alphas surprises me, but I love it.

We’d be useless without her. She’s close. My alpha. I never dreamed I’d find someone who matched my energy so perfectly.

I turn my head and see her jogging towards me, her dress flowing out behind her. She looks beautiful, like some kind of angel. Lyrics flow in my mind, twisting and turning.

I smile and lift a hand, but I pause, seeing the fear that fills the link, understanding what it means in a sudden terrifying rush.

I glance around, suddenly feeling uncomfortable in the night. I’m poised to flee, but I don’t know which direction to go. A sound behind me has me freezing in place. I’m too scared to turn, but I can feel her there. I know it’s her. There wouldn’t be anyone else.

I stare at Erin and wish with all my heart that things could be different.

“Don’t move, lover,” a voice whispers behind me.

I stay perfectly still, my eyes locked on Erin. Ah, shit, I really fucked up this time. Bile rushes up into my mouth, and the hope that I had turns to dust inside me.

I close my eyes. The familiar voice is one I know almost as well as I know my own.

Delilah.

“You really fucked us all over,” she hisses. “Did you think you could walk away from the band, from us?”

I snort. “Because I didn’t want to fuck you. Because I refused to be forced into a pack with you? Yeah, I fucking thought I could.”

“You belong to me.”

“No, I don’t. I don’t want to be in a fake pack with people who aren’t mine. You lied to Jason. You manipulated everyone. I don’t want to fuck you anymore. I never did.”

She snorts. “You got hard.”

“What you did was rape,” I hiss. “I never wanted you.”

I feel a sharp something cut into me. I cry out, and Erin stumbles, running even faster. But she’s too far away.

“I’ll kill her and free you so we can be together.” She laughs. A musical sound. She does have a deceptively lovely voice. All part of her sick charm. “Did you hear what I’ve been doing?”

I go still. “What have you done?”

“I’ve been making sure everyone knows they can’t touch you.”

My insides turn to ice. “That was you with the thick shakes?”

“Yes. Well, me and a few friends. I heard the waitress gossiping about Bray's new squeeze being allergic to bananas. And that was very lucky that the beta of yours saved her before she went squish.” Delilah laughs.

I feel dizzy.

“Did you kill Jason?”

She stiffens. “He was going to let you go. Find a way to get you free. Even threatening to kill his precious sons didn’t work this time.”

“You’ve been here this whole time?” I murmur, almost in awe of her evil.

“Always, one step behind you. Watching over you, my love. I’ve seen how naughty you’ve been. How you think you can just start a new life? But that’s not your fate. You don’t belong to them, you belong to me. I’m just going to get rid of all these pesky distractions.”

Her voice goes cold and vicious.

“No!” I hiss. I’m suddenly furious. A world without Erin isn’t a world I want to live in. I stare at her, so close but so far. She’s so beautiful. My saviour.

“Yes. You belong to me, Razor.”

“My name isn’t Razor. I’m Locke Raines, and I’m not in the band. I’m not going to be there ever again, Delilah. And I’m not part of that damn pack.”

She growls. “You’ll get used to it. Like you did before. When you realise you can’t run. This time, I’m going to make sure Wiley bonds you properly. He’s going to be punished for not doing it right.”

“I’ll hate you,” I say in desperation.

“I don’t care if you hate me. You’ll still belong to me. You’ll perform for me. And you’ll fuck me. You won’t have a choice.”

I feel sick.

“I won’t do it.”

“Then I’ll kill your alpha.” She sounds like she could gleefully do it.

I inhale, and my whole body stills. She would kill Erin. I know she would. She killed Jason.

“Delilah, just let me go.”

“I can’t do that, Locke. I really, really can’t.”

I don’t dare close my eyes.

“I love her. More than I thought possible.”

“I feel sad for you,” she sounds like she feels anything but. “It’s not changing anything. You should never have touched them when you’re mine. She has to die. It’s just how it has to be.”

“How did you manage to do all this? How did you get control of the pack?”

“I have shit on Emma. If they want to keep Emma out of jail, then they go along with what I want. Wiley and Paige resisted at first, but when I spilled the secret, they were more than happy to help me keep you.”

“You’re insane.”

“Perhaps. But I’m part of the greatest rock band in the world. I’m living a life of luxury, fucking the hottest people on the planet. I’m still very mad you hid that you’re an omega. We’re going to have so much fun.”

Her hand runs up my back. Like a lover. I want to vomit.

I can’t let her hurt Erin.

With one last look at my alpha, a goodbye glance that would never be long enough. I turn so that I’m facing Delilah. “You have this all figured out,” I say in my most cutting tone.

“I do. It’s really best if you just give in.” She strokes her fingers down my cheek and smiles.

She has purple hair now. It makes her look ugly. She’s wearing too much makeup, and her clothes never cover her properly. I hate her. More than I’ve hated any person ever. She has been the source of my self-hatred, my self-disgust, that feeling of being trapped and vulnerable. She’s drugged me, hit me, raped me. Over and over. I remember waking up with no memory of fucking the naked women draped over me. Of being sore as strange alphas purred my name as I fought to escape them and rush to the bathroom to vomit. I remember the terror of seeing the bite mark on my shoulder.

I remember trying to end it all. How I stood on the roof of my mansion and contemplated a swan dive into freedom.

This woman is everything evil in this world.

I hate her.

I’ve never been so revolted in my life, but I’m a performer, so I keep my expression hidden. I hide my thoughts and my intentions.

I am, after all, the front man of the biggest rock band in the world.

“You didn’t count on one thing,” I say coldly.

“Oh, and what’s that?”

“I’d die first. Before you hurt her, before anyone hurts her, I’ll happily embrace my death,” I whisper, and then I wrap her in my arms, holding her tight so she can’t let go.

“Obey me,” I purr, using that skill I’ve mastered to slip beneath her guard once more and force her to do as I want. I used it to save myself. It hasn’t always worked. It’s not reliable, but in my most desperate moment, I discovered it. I can compel her to stop. I can compel her to leave me alone. And now…I can compel her not to fight me when I kill us both. It’s the only way to be sure.

I’m so sorry it has to be this way.

But I’m not letting her win.

I throw us sideways clear over the wall, and then we’re falling. She’s screaming in my face. Violently hitting me. I fling her away, uncaring of what happens to her.

In the eternity that comes before I hit the water, I see my pack in my mind’s eye. I hear them call my name.

I’m not going to let anyone hurt them. And maybe now…no one’s going to hurt me, either.

And then I hit the ice cold water, and I don’t think anything more.