Chapter Twelve

Nina

"Now?" My heart leaps at the thought, out of excitement, but a little out of fear. I haven't been on a horse for years, and I'm not sure I remember how.

"I owe you a ride, remember?"

As if I've forgotten. "Right. The one you asked me on before I found out you're with my cousin?"

He wipes his hand through the air, as if deleting the facts. "That's neither here nor there. But right now is the perfect time to catch a quick ride. There are no guests and nothing important do right now. Unless you need to be somewhere?"

My day was going to include sitting in my room, eating all the snacks while binge watching Gilmore Girls , avoiding Jordy as she settles in, even if we've made peace. I still feel awkward as hell around her, and the idea of riding horses on the beach sounds way better than anything else I could be doing.

"I haven't been on a horse in years," I admit, getting nervous as he places a bridle on Meredith. He opens her stall and hands me the reins.

"Your body will remember," he says, then moves toward Sara as my cheeks burn. Just the mention of my body from his lips, and I'm distracted. I shake myself free as he turns again, and we lead the horses toward the tack. He helps me saddle her, then stands back as I place a boot in the stirrup and swing over. He's right. It's as if I've only taken a few weeks off from riding, because being up there feels like the most natural thing in the world.

He leads the way down the road, then across the highway where we follow a narrow path through the brush to the beach. While getting up on a horse feels natural, riding one reminds me that these muscles haven't moved like this in years. I know I'll be sore later today, but right now the swaying motion is like an old friend.

We get to the clearing, and I inhale sharply at the sight of the beach in the morning. Thin wisps of fog hover over the unblemished sand, which is washed free from the retreating tide. The sky still holds remnants of rosy pink and flush purples, though the light of the rising sun is starting to envelop the colors of dawn. My back soaks in the rays, my skin prickling from the contrast of cool morning air and the succulent warmth from the sun, and I arch as I drink it in. When I glance over at Brayden, he's watching me. Once again, I feel the heat rise in my cheeks, and I duck my head. I can't stop the smile creeping over my lips, and realize I probably look like a fool.

"We can just walk the horses," Brayden says, seeming oblivious to the effect he has on me as the horses sway down the beach, side by side. "Or if you're comfortable, we can trot a little."

"Or we can run," I say, clicking my heels into Meredith's flank. She responds immediately, falling into a gentle trot. I get my bearings, my body jostling awkwardly until my hips become an extension of my horse. Rolling with her as she runs, I click her sides again, and she picks up the pace. My hair loosens from the bun on the top of my head, and I can feel it flying behind me as the breeze whips against my cheeks.

I sense Brayden catch up with me, and I laugh as I try to urge Meredith to go faster.

"You think you're pretty cute, don't you," he calls out, flashing me a wicked grin as he keeps pace with me. Then he's racing ahead. I watch the easy way his body moves with the horse, how natural he looks, his broad shoulders under his thick flannel, the thick strength of his thighs clenching the horse as they run across the sand. For a moment, I lose myself in a vision of what the future could hold. Of us doing this every day, stopping for a picnic lunch, then resting in each other's arms as we watch the waves roll in.

It's so brief, and I brush it aside as soon as it hits me, then nudge Meredith's flanks again to catch up.

Brayden slows as we approach the other side of the beach. There's a post next to the mountain, and we dismount and secure the horses to the hitch. He pulls an apple from his pocket, then breaks it in two with just his hands.

"Showing off, Winters?" I ask him, and he grins as he hands me one half, then holds the other under Sara's nose.

"It depends. Are you impressed?"

He holds my gaze, and I'm overwhelmed by how much I want to just wrap myself up in his arms, press my face against his flannel, and memorize his scent.

"You have to try harder than that," I tease, feeding Meredith my half apple.

We strip off our boots and socks, then roll up our pant legs. I chase him out to the water, laughing as I avoid the kicking splash he sends my way. With the horses tied up, we run through the waves, and it's easy to forget he's my employer, and that he's marrying my cousin. He grabs me around the waist, and I fly through the air in his arms, laughing the whole time. He eventually sets me down, holding me up as I regain my footing.

And he doesn't let go.

The waves rush over our feet, and I look up, my eyes connecting with his. I can't look away. I inhale the musky cologne of his skin over the salt of the sea, and I relax into the solid space within his arms. Our breathing is shallow as we remain frozen, and I see a million questions in his eyes. His eyebrows crinkle on his forehead, and I feel the tension in his body.

You felt it, right?

I'm transported back to that very first night, seeing him in the glow of the streetlights, both of us breathless as we realized this was so much more than a chance encounter.

If our timing had been different, it could have been us.

Damn, I want to kiss him. It's happened so many times today, but now the need is so great I can barely breathe; the way he keeps looking at my lips, I know he's feeling the same way.

But I'm engaged to your cousin, and that's not going to change.

I pull away from him, though it takes all my strength. He swears under his breath, letting go of me completely and turning away. The air feels cold, the waves completely ridiculous and silly—the whole day—and the fact that I'm here with a man I can't have, torturing myself by working for him while my cousin prepares to marry him.

What the fuck am I doing?

"We should go," Brayden says, touching me on the elbow before wading through the water and back up the beach. I nod, even though his back is to me. When I close my eyes, saltwater forms on my lashes, and only the heat of them lets me know the tears are mine and not the ocean's.

We ride at a slow pace, remaining silent the whole way. My mind is a jumbled mess as I replay the moment, trying to get a grip on what happened—what's happened numerous times today. If we keep this up, will we kiss for real? Do I want him to?

Absolutely. But no way in hell can I let this happen again.

We reach the ranch, and there are a few cars in the driveway. Brayden turns to me and grins. "You remember the guys, right?" He hops off his horse, then helps me do the same, his hand resting on my thigh as I swing my leg over. I can do it myself, but I let him help me, then savor the warmth from his palm that lingers on my skin.

Brayden trots over to the house while I follow. I feel a bit shy as I take in the five impossibly hot guys who rise from their spots on the porch, jumping down the stairs to clap him on the back. I'm never shy around guys. In fact, I could probably use a filter most of the time. But right now, everything inside me feels jumbled and weird, and it's all because of Brayden. Meeting his friends and fellow ranch workers, I have this sudden fear they won't like me, or that I won't fit in.

Pull yourself together, I mentally order myself. Then I smile wide as their heads turn to me.

"New hire!" one of the guys shouts, then races in my direction. I brace myself as five guys dogpile me, then wrap me in a bear hug between them.

Seriously, I can die now. I am in a cowboy sandwich, and the rest of life has lost meaning.

They finally let go, and Brayden introduces me to each of them properly. There's Jake, a surfer crossed with a cowboy with his dirty blonde hair peeking out from his hat, sun kissed tan skin with a spray of freckles, and eyes even bluer than Brayden's. Next is Nate, with golden eyes and a warm brown complexion, and smile so wide that I can't help but grin back. Forrest and River are twins, each with curly sun-bleached brown hair they've tied back. There is just enough difference between them to see they're not identical, but I can already tell it's going to take a while to tell them apart. Finally there's Levi, who's tall and lean with eyes darker than midnight, shining out from an even darker complexion and a smile as bright as the sun.

Today's a workday for the guys, so they don't stick around beyond introductions, and soon it's just Brayden and me again. I kick at the ground, scuffing dirt on my boot as I try to think of something witty to say. Something clever. Anything to erase the almost kiss we had before, and how awkward I feel about it now—and frustrated.

"This was—" he says at the same time as I say, "I guess I should…"

We both laugh, then he motions for me to go first.

"I'm going to head out," I say, nodding my head toward me car, as if the car has some say in this.

"This was fun," he says. "But don't think every day is going to be all fun and games." His eyes narrow, and there's a smile in them.

"Right, because you're such a hard ass and will probably work me to the bone." The words are out of my mouth before I can catch the double meaning, the sexual undertones. I bite my lip, looking at his expression to see if he caught that too.

The way his blue eyes darken, hell yes, he caught that. But then he smiles and pulls me into a hug. I inhale his scent, completely aware of how long and inappropriate this hug is, but how much I don't want to let him go. But eventually, he releases me and I step back, trying my damnedest to pretend I'm not affected by him.

"Get some rest, because tomorrow's going to be a long day."

And as I drive away, I can't help but think, God, I hope so.