Chapter 15

Colby

“You have the physical and visual representations of Christmas, my Colby.” He was so excited, I smiled before I realized he was talking about my Christmas decorations. “I am very impressed.”

It wasn’t just empty words either. He seemed in awe of the white lights strung around the ceiling of my living room, and the small tree over in the corner had him sighing like it was the cutest thing he’d ever seen.

“Thank you.” I managed to get the door to my apartment locked before he picked me up, but it was close. “We need to get you some too.”

For someone who liked the holidays so much, his apartment had been very blank.

Even if he didn’t have much space, we could hang some lights and do a tiny tabletop-sized tree somewhere in his apartment.

“I had not decided what would be appropriate.” Saint might not know what decorations to get, but he wasn’t shy about studying my place. “You have a holder for human shoes. Humans have a fascination with feet decorations. They are not simply for protection.”

Because we were fragile and creative.

“We’ve mastered the art of turning nearly anything and everything into something we can decorate.” Hmm. “I think that has to be part of just being human?”

They didn’t have that, so we couldn’t say it was something that every species did.

“Do you think there is a human book on the subject?” Saint leaned behind my couch, making thinking sounds as he stroked the red blanket I’d gotten last Christmas in an office gift exchange. “We must return to the bookstore for physical information.”

“We can probably go to the library to see if they have anything or maybe we can look online?” I was pretty sure there were sites devoted to academic research too.

“Oh, my Colby.” Holding me out from his body like a naughty toddler, he frowned and looked disappointed in me. “Libraries are for sharing information.”

Yeah?

Oh.

Whole society of isolationist Doms.

Got it.

“You don’t like sharing that, huh? Okay, we’ll see what we can find at the bookstore.” Would used bookstores be worse or better?

“Food is shared for survival and technology is shared for the good of the species.” When I nodded, he looked relieved I understood the problem and cuddled me back against his torso. “Books are to possess and to be the original designer of information.”

Looked like I had a level three book hoarder on my hands…but at least it sounded like being the one to sell a book was fine.

“I can understand that.” We’d just need to make sure he had lots of shelves and maybe a way to rotate through his stock once he realized there were limits on how big of an apartment we could get.

We’d also talk about the benefits of owning ebooks at some point…we’d just make it a slow introduction to the topic.

Dead trees were definitely more fun, though.

But physically decorating his place seemed like a safer topic, so I went back to my original thoughts as he slowly worked his way around my living room and over to my smaller bookshelf. “I’ve got some extra Christmas lights and a few things like that we can bring over to your place. How does that sound?”

His ability to multitask was amazing because he seemed to be cataloging every book I owned even as he responded. “I was informed by an authority figure called a salesperson that I should be careful not to offend.”

“You guys never offend. What happened?” It had to have been something weird.

“I added assorted holiday items to my carrying device, but I was told that some were religious specific. He did not know if I could have them.” Saint shrugged like he wasn’t offended, just confused. “Research was conflicting.”

I was going to have more questions about what went wrong, but we’d come back to that later. “Well, I’m a human who celebrates Christmas and I say you can do it too.”

I’d get him stuff from any other religion he wanted to explore too, but Christmas was a good start.

“Thank you, my Colby.” Snuggling me closer, Saint made a happy hum and his body wiggled. “Decorating shared living spaces is a human bonding activity as well.”

He was so cute but so stubborn.

I was just as good at it, though.

“We’re going to have fun.” Giving him a quick peck, I settled back against him since it didn’t look like he was going to put me down anytime soon. “And if we need more, we can just go shopping. There are all kinds of decorations.”

“I have visited the store called Home Depot. They have decorative trees that span colors and styles.” He was back to his humans are fun but strange voice, but since he was right, I wasn’t offended. “Part of relationship bonding is the merging of styles. We shall research our options so that next year we know how we are Christmas merged.”

Sounded reasonable to me.

“I grew up doing the brightly colored red and green kind of trees, but I like this one too.” It was only about four feet and had come prewired with white lights, so that’d been the direction I’d gone with the rest of the space. “I’m flexible, though. We’ll pick something out we both like. You’re right. It’s a good way to bond.”

Most of the decorations I had now were silver and red, but I wasn’t passionate about the combination. “I have a cousin who does three different trees because so many people in her immediate family are kind of insane and all have very strong tastes.”

Her social media posts around the holidays were so stressful they nearly gave me ulcers.

“Many humans find variety appealing.” Walking us a few feet past my bookshelf to study the pictures I’d actually managed to finally get hung up on my walls, Saint shrugged. “I will endeavor to form an opinion on the subject so that we may compromise.”

For bonding.

“That sounds like a great plan.” One only a Dom would come up with. “We can go tomorrow if you want to.”

Once Monday hit, it’d be harder to find the time to wander around looking for tree ideas to compromise on, but we still had a lot of the weekend left.

“Establishing merged schedules is also a form of human bonding.” Satisfied with his examination of my pictures, he stepped back and made another sweeping study of the living room before taking us to the kitchen. “Female humans on social media platforms have explained why having a family calendar is highly important.”

We were going to keep an eye on his social media consumption.

“Making sure we know what’s happening during the week is a great idea.” It’d probably help keep him settled too. The books I’d read on the subject of keeping one’s alien Dom happy said they functioned best when they could stalk their human partners without much effort.

Effort meant stress and stress meant worrying.

“We’ll work on that this afternoon or tomorrow.” The last thing I wanted was for him to worry before we were…comfortable with each other. “Are you hungry yet?”

It wasn’t a smooth conversational transition but it made sense with the way he was studying the contents of my small pantry.

He was analyzing it so carefully it looked like he was planning for the apocalypse.

“No, my Colby.” Carefully examining each item, including picking up a jar of pasta sauce to read the ingredients, Saint was wearing a serious expression. “You have a variety of food objects. Ingredients. You have a variety of ingredients. I am pleased with your nutritional consumption.”

Well, that seemed to be one thing off his to-worry-about list.

“I do pretty good most of the time.” It just wasn’t fun cooking for one person. “We’ll have to talk about what kinds of human food you like so I can make you dinner when we’re over here.”

I thought that was an easy topic until he shifted me around to look at my face.

Oops.

“I like cooking.” Yep, that was better. It got me an indulgent smile. “It’d make me feel nice to be able to do it for you sometimes.”

“Many humans are natural caretakers.” He was mostly talking to himself, but I nodded anyway. “Human submissives thrive on having a variety of ways to please their dominant partners.”

If any of them ran into a true service sub, that might end up giving one of them an ulcer if it wasn’t handled right.

“Yes.” Saint wasn’t typical, though, so I wasn’t too worried. “And it’s a way human partners show romantic intentions.”

“Romance is important for building bonds in humans.” Saint said it like he’d read that fact in a book, but he’d already done lots of incredibly sweet things for me. “Bonds can be slower to grow between humans, so providing socially acceptable ways to build them is important.”

He really didn’t seem to understand why humans weren’t constantly groping each other in public.

“It’s like cuddling and being held.” Nuzzling against him, I smiled when he made an understanding sound. “But just the interactive or conversational version of it.”

Were there any relationship books that really explained human dating and not just gave a cute overview of how to communicate and not be a dick to your partner?

“I am very romantic.” He was confident about that as he snuggled me closer. “We ate at a restaurant and I fed you dessert after our evening of physical pleasures. I even introduced you to what humans would consider my friends .”

Well, yeah, he had been romantic.

“We had a bath and you got me all clean in the shower too, and there’s been a lot of physical pleasure.” What else? “Oh, and you bought my books at the store. That was very sweet.”

He’d also been really stubborn about them going back to his place, though. It seemed to be his way of making sure I knew where I belonged because when I’d asked about it, he’d just patted my head and said I could play with them when we came back.

Saint perked up as the list of his accomplishments got longer. “Providing you with entertainment and educational sexual material is my pleasure, my Colby.”

He was adorable.

And really sexy when he held me down and made me come.

“Thank you.” Giving him a kiss on the cheek, since he was busy analyzing my box of mac-n-cheese, I went back to snuggling against him. “I had fun and I’m going to enjoy taking care of you in different ways too.”

Once I figured out what those were going to be.

“We will list caretaking options if you wish.” The pleased sound in his voice made me feel a bit like a puppy he was patting on the head for being cute, but there were worse things than having a boyfriend who thought I was adorable.

“Yes, please.” I’d already started thinking about that when one tentacle skimmed over a box of brownie mix and slowed down to go back to it. “Would you like us to bring that back and we can make it together?”

His kitchen was small but it was functional, and we couldn’t ask the human helper to find me dessert every time I stayed over.

“Yes. That is a good idea, my Colby.” His words said good but his tone and the way he’d started petting me said he was thinking about something.

So I just waited.

He was about as subtle as a sledgehammer, so I knew it wouldn’t take long.

It didn’t.

One box of brownies and two bags of chips later, he finally decided to get it out. “Humans have very strict social norms surrounding the transplantation of personal objects.”

He must’ve been nervous for the sentence to come out so interestingly.

“Yeah, we don’t just randomly leave our stuff at other people’s houses.” I was pretty sure that was what he meant, but I was glad when I got a very human nod. “So you’re wanting to make sure that I understand what signals I’m sending you when I bring over stuff like food from the pantry, the Christmas stuff, and some clothes?”

Not a surprise, considering he’d tried to poke at it several times already.

“Yes, my human.” Saint had read enough romance novels to pat me on the head, though. “You are not ready to discuss such topics. However—”

Ugh.

However.

“Thank you for understanding that.” Hmm. “I haven’t always made good decisions when something happens quickly.”

If I’d been a little, I’d have just shoved a binkie in my mouth and ignored everything else around me.

“I get excited and things just go wrong.” Very wrong. “But you don’t do that. I know you guys are trustworthy and honest about what you want. I read books.”

Books that were clearly a lot more accurate than I’d realized.

“I have seen your books, my Colby. You have read accurate books based on our domination-based relationships with humans.” Saint didn’t seem to think that was pushing my weird limits around our current conversation, but he also didn’t try to go any further. “Acknowledging that is acceptable.”

So we were done?

I waited to see what would happen next, but he seemed content and that was kind of unnerving if I was being honest.

But since he was honest, I probably had to be too.

“Are you going to write a book about us someday?” Ignoring that I was the one pushing my own limits, I focused on his happy sound.

“Me?” He seemed surprised by that but he didn’t let it distract him from whatever made him head out of the kitchen without a second thought. “I am not a writer of human relationship fiction.”

“I don’t know…” My teasing tone got another bubbly sound from him. “You have a good imagination and you like reading all those dirty books on relationship fiction. You’re even in monster groups.”

Dirty ones.

Were there boring ones?

Fuck. I’d given myself more questions to look up.