24. Reina

Chapter twenty-four

Reina

M y baser instinct screams run, a predator is hunting you!

But it's not a thirst for blood in Jasper's glowing gaze. It's a hunger for my flesh, for every part of me—body and spirit. His steps quicken and I hold up my arms, ready to be swept away by him with the song.

We fold together seamlessly as we come chest to chest. Electricity crackles down my limbs, moving my legs. His eyes have captured me and won't let go. Despite not knowing the dance, he's leading now. He twirls us, my feet barely touching the ground, and I feel as though I might be floating away.

"Is this what you wanted?" he asks in a deep, silky voice.

"I told you as much," I say.

"Not this dance."

"What then?"

"You want me mindless, on the brink of making mistakes. Why?"

I swallow hard. "I only want to see what's really lurking beneath the surface."

He pushes me away but holds my hand tight as he spins me around and around. My dress flutters over my legs and the sensation has me hyper aware of my sensitive skin. When he pulls me back into him, his hand falls tightly on my lower back. He presses us together hard enough for me to feel just how much he wants me.

"I want the truth," I whisper.

He cradles me as we dip down, my hair sliding off my shoulders and exposing my neck. His eyes brighten and he groans as his lips draw nearer.

"After this dance," he says.

His kiss slips over my pulse point and my heart ratchets up to a new beat. Not the one of the song, or the speed of the dance, but something entirely in tune with Jasper and the way he makes me feel. A way I didn't know I could ever—or should ever—feel.

I'm a princess of Fynren. I'm the rebellion's weapon. I'm not allowed to let the fluttering in my stomach blossom into something bigger. I'm not allowed to let my heart lead me, especially when the destination is both mad and impossible.

Jasper pulls us out of the dip and whirls us again. I don't hear the music anymore. I don't care if we're not dancing to the beat because what matters is that he's holding me like I'm the greatest treasure. He's looking at me as if I'm the sun in his darkness. He's adoring me with every fiber of his being, and I don't want to stop myself from giving it all back to him exactly the same way.

I remind myself that is both mad and impossible.

I slacken my hold on Jasper, and he leads us to a stop. Finally, I'm able to look away from him. The men and women around the campfire have been watching all the dancers, but I feel their eyes dart away from me the second my gaze falls on them. It's as if they can hear my secret, feel my will to keep my honor slipping away bit by bit.

How could I come to care for the man—selkie—who stole me from my home and my purpose?

Jasper cups my cheek and turns my face back toward him. His eyes are dim now, their normal dark color, and filled with concern. "What is it?"

"I'm tired," I say with an innocent shrug, desperate to hide myself and my thoughts, begging that none of them will slip out.

He smiles. "Then let me take you to bed, wife ."

The word sends an undeniable shock through my body to my core. It's just our cover, it's not real, but the way it sounds coming from him…it does something to me. Something I don't want to deny.

I nod and Jasper tucks me under his arm as we leave the firelight behind. We wind through the other travelers toward our tent until we're clear, and then Jasper leans down and pulls me up into his arms.

"I can walk," I say, none of the fire I want to feel coming out in my words.

"But a good husband wouldn't make you," he says, and I feel he means those words much deeper than our make-believe cover story.

He kneels at the opening to our tent, resting my butt on his thigh as he unlaces my boots.

"I can take off my own shoes," I say, holding onto his shoulder to keep myself steady.

"A good husband doesn't mind doing it for you."

My heart flips around in my chest. I can't let it. I can't allow myself to be pulled under his spell. I need to keep him where I want him. Needing me, but not too close.

"You don't have to do these things." I cup his cheek and turn his face up to mine. "You're not my husband."

His eyebrows pull together in a flicker of what looks like real hurt, and then he smiles. "I am right now, and I won't have anyone questioning how good of one I am."

He pulls off my boots and sets them just inside our tent. I hold onto his shoulders as he carries me in, stopping with his feet at the flap so he can kick off his own boots. He sets me on the blankets and then grabs one of our magus crystals dangling from a string overhead. His magic flows into it, and the gem comes alive with light and color. He lights two more, their orange and red hues soft enough to fall asleep by, but bright enough to see one another.

I tuck my knees up to my chest as he sits beside me. "Answers now?"

He sighs. "When I was eleven, Men came for my tribe. They took or slaughtered everyone but me. I was able to hide as an octopus, as my mother ordered. She made me promise to save them."

The music goes on outside the tent, a distant backdrop to his story.

"The man responsible calls himself a king of the southern islands, Erik Vansen. Illya has tried several times to disrupt his false reign, but because of my family, they've failed. He uses their magic to change the seas, damage the boats, and worse. I tried to stop it, to stop them…" He shakes his head, pain knitting his brow.

I place my hand on his arm just to let him know I'm here, that I'm listening.

"He has them under some kind of spell. They're not themselves. The Illyan monarchy has stopped trying to usurp the false king. His island is small, it produces very little, and the reward of taking it back is not worth the risk of more ships."

He looks at me. "I couldn't tell them why they were failing. I've seen what happens to selkies who are discovered. Fynren and Wolfsheim took twelve Emerald selkies not two months ago, and I fear they're enduring the same fate as those Vansen took."

I let my arm slide around his back and lean against him, feeling the sadness deep in his bones. Sensing the loneliness in his words and voice.

"I promised to save them," he whispers. "And I need you to do that."

"Why?" I ask, holding him tighter.

"Vansen wants a queen. He's hosting an eclipse ball, inviting every eligible lady of power to attend and court him. I need you to get close to him." He looks up at me, his eyes burning with retribution. "I need you so I can kill him."

He looks down at his feet, sighing deeply as if a weight has been removed from his shoulders.

"But why me ?" I ask. "There are hundreds of powerful magi out there you could've taken. Why risk taking me?"

He shrugs. "I've been… drawn to Fynish shores for years. I don't know why. But when I saw you, taking in the sun's light on the edge of a cliff, I knew you were the perfect distraction. The perfect bait."

Bait.

Just another kind of weapon.

The fluttery feeling in my stomach turns sour. I pull my arm back, wrapping it around my knees again.

"I know it's vile. I'm a bastard. I could've told you…" He trails off. "I was afraid if I gave you a choice, you'd say no, and I wouldn't have the will to ignore your wishes. That my years of planning would be wasted, and I'd never see them again. That I would be a liar, breaking the one promise that truly matters most."

The music shifts outside to something slower as just the violinist carries on.

"That was a horrible promise she had you make," I finally say.

Jasper scowls at me. "Why?"

"An eleven-year-old selkie can't be expected to topple kings and become a hero. It was cruel for her to put that weight on you alone."

The furrow in his brow deepens. "And what about you? The rebellion using you as a means to their end?"

The sourness in my chest goes starkly bitter. "Yes, well, I guess we're both victims of evil monarchs."

The quiet wraps around us as the violin stops. Soft murmurs of people heading off to their respective tents fill the silence, and the firelight beyond goes dim.

"I'll help you," I say.

Jasper's head snaps toward me. "Why?"

"Because your people don't deserve to suffer. And I hate bastards that would make others suffer so they can be powerful."

He wraps his trembling arms around me and pushes his forehead against mine. "Thank you, Rei."

I hold him for a while as the camp winds down. Finally, Jasper releases me. He stretches out his legs and flops on the blankets. I reach up and tap two of the magus crystals, letting the magic drain out through me until they extinguish, then lie beside him.

"Sometimes I wonder if the gods hate me," he whispers, like saying it too loud might bring down their wrath.

"I know the feeling."

His hand finds mine between us and he threads our fingers together. "I'm sorry for what I've done to you."

My throat tightens and tears burn my eyes. I'm glad it's dark. I swallow and suck in a sharp breath to keep my voice from wavering. "I might forgive you. One day," I say with as much playfulness as I can muster.

"What will I have to do to earn it?"

I lick my lips, nerves battering my every thought. Now is the time. He's trusted me with a deep truth. I can ask for this in return.

"Help me kill my mother."

His thumb coasts along mine in a slow drag. "What then?"

I'm struck silent. What then, indeed. I hadn't thought of the after, only the act. Save my kingdom and my people, but not what comes next. There could be a power struggle. Any number of wealthy families in Fynren might vie for the throne if they think it's weak.

And it is.

My eldest sister is likely dead, but certain never to return. She's been gone more than half my life. Lily hasn't come home from school. She was abducted by pirates, and despite what Mother said about her being on the way, she never came home. And Alyse…

There are no other heirs left but me, and if I want the throne, I will have to hold onto it with force.

But do I want it?

Not particularly.

I want my people to prosper. I want my kingdom to be fair and to thrive.

And I can't trust anyone else to do that.

"Marry me," I say before I can think better of it.

"What?" Jasper sits up so fast I flinch.

I swallow back nerves for what feels like the thousandth time. "Rule with me. Protect your people and give them a place to live free from the abuse of humans. Help me keep mine safe from our threats abroad and within. Help Fynren prosper."

I can hear my heart beating, feel it in my throat, as I wait for his answer. He looks off toward the tent flap and I wonder if he's thinking about running. Perhaps I didn't have him where I needed him to spring this. It was too soon. I played my hand, and now it's over.

I'm holding my breath, but the burn in my lungs is nothing compared to the ache in my chest. Waiting for his answer feels like eternity.

Slowly, he lowers back down to the blankets. "Yeah. Okay."

Something in me crumbles to ash and I think it might be my heart. He agreed, so why does it feel like I'm dying inside?

"Good," I whisper as tears gather in my eyes.

Jasper turns away from me. "Good night, princess."

I roll over, tucking my arms against my chest as I stifle my sobs. "Night."