19. Jasper

Chapter nineteen

Jasper

R eina was almost mine. It might be better that we were interrupted. Gods, what would I have done to her if she'd given any hint that she wanted it, too? Alejandra would've known just how much she means to me, and so would the rest of the town.

I carry the buckets of cold water over to the fire and hoist them up onto the crane. I use the poker to push them in and then just stare, letting my mind wander off into the make-believe place where someone hadn't knocked on the door. My dick was already hard, but remembering the animalistic groan of her pleasure from that night on the beach, and imagining her making it again, tenfold, under me as I claim her thoroughly—

"Jasper," Reina says so quietly I think she was hoping I wouldn't hear her. My name from her lips does weird things to my insides. Twisting them up and wringing them out, leaving me hollow until I hear her say it again, a little louder this time.

I turn to her. "What is it, princess?"

She folds her knees under her and sits up straight. "What does Ohksano'amai mean?"

My pulse jumps in my dick. I'm not sure it could get any harder. I want to tell her. I want her to know what we are to one another and that she pulls me to her just like Nol'Ther drags the sea. Her smile makes me swell like I might burst with emotion I didn't know I was allowed to feel, and her ire thrills me to push her further. To see a woman so unafraid to fight back, to be brave—even if it's stupid—take risks, love deeply, try fiercely…

It frustrates me that she's not already mine, but I'm excited that I get to chase her.

I come to the edge of the bed and kneel so I'm looking up at her. "It's a very important word in my language, just like Ohksana'amai."

"You're not going to tell me, are you?"

I smirk. "Not right now."

She reaches out and brushes my curly hair off my brow. She's so casual about it, I forget to be shocked. Her cool fingers slide across my forehead to my ear, sending a thrill down to my bones. She traces the tip of my ear to my lobe, and that little gesture has my heart fighting to escape my chest and jump into her lap, begging for her to take it, to keep it, cherish it.

Stupid thoughts.

I must still be in Heat.

She clucks her tongue and pulls back. "There goes my mutinous body again."

I capture her hand and place her open palm against my cheek, closing my eyes as I lean into it. I don't want this moment to be over just yet. Her thumb strokes my jaw. The scratch of her nail dragging along my facial hair, the sound it makes, has my breath stuttering.

"You're not a bad man, are you?" she asks.

I smirk. "Not a Man."

"Jasper," she chastises as she slides her hand over my mouth.

My eyes snap open in a miniature panic.

"Alejandra," she whispers.

Right.

Fuck.

So, Reina's going to keep my secret. I half expected her to spout it and beg to be saved from me, but she didn't. She's invested in getting to the bottom of this—of what I need her for—even if it's dangerous for her. It's just another few R-word reasons I can't stand to keep my hands off her.

Reckless.

Resolute.

Remarkable.

I kiss her palm and tug her wrist over my shoulder until she's leaning down into my space. "She doesn't know whether I have a dick. I could be a very masculine female."

Reina scowls but grins at the same time. It's an endearing expression of amusement and disbelief, that I'd fake being a woman just to hide that I'm a selkie. Whatever makes her look at me with something other than hatred.

Her other hand comes around and lands on the back of my neck. "You're ridiculous."

I shrug, loving the weight of her arms on my shoulders. "Better than being boring."

Her brow furrows. "Are you calling me boring?"

"No. Just as states of being go, I'd prefer to be ridiculous than boring."

She smiles gently. "I prefer that, too."

"You certainly keep me on my toes. Going to run again when we get to Illya?"

"Hmm." She sucks on her lower lip and screws up her face in mock concentration. I wish it was my teeth biting into her soft pink flesh. "I guess it depends on what you tell me when we get there."

My heart thuds hard in my throat and I know I'm about to say something stupid, but I can't stop myself. "I'll tell you the truth. I hope it doesn't make you run."

Her eyes search mine and her face softens. "Why didn't you tell me the truth to begin with?"

"I needed you to trust me."

Her eyebrow arches. "And you think I trust you now?"

"Yes, I do."

"I hardly know you." She chuckles.

I cup her cheek and lean in. "You know enough."

She sucks in a shuddering breath. "Why do you make me feel like this?"

"Like what?" I ask, stroking my thumb along her rosy cheek.

"Like I'm out of my mind," she whispers. Her hand tightens on the back of my neck, and I feel the possession in her hold, like I'm hers . "Like I want to kiss you."

My pulse jumps. I rest my other hand on her knee and move even closer. "What's stopping you?"

"My better sense," she says, her breath whispering across my lips in a ghost of a kiss.

"Fortunate that I don't have any of that," I say, pushing myself closer.

The heat between us is intense. I lose track of what's around us as my mind narrows on her. Just her.

She swallows, her eyes darting down to my lips. "I know."

"See, you know me plenty. Tell me more about myself."

"Narcissist," she hisses playfully. "You think you're the hottest thing to strut into a room—"

"I am."

She tsks. "Not when you walk in with me."

I chuckle. "Who's full of themselves now?"

"I'm literally made of fire inside," she says, her eyes glowing a deep blue that warms my face.

I cup the back of her neck, ensuring she can't escape this. "And you are much hotter than me, I'll admit."

Suddenly, her expression falls. "You're deeply troubled, and you need help, but you're too scared to ask for it."

Like plunging into ice, my body goes rigid. I pull back and stand, needing distance from her and the words that are much too true. She saw all this in just a week. What have the Men I've been interacting with for the last ten years seen?

"The bathwater is ready," I say, though I'm not sure it's true.

I pull the crane out of the fire and grab the handle of the first bucket. Reina gasps out my name and then I feel my error burning through my palm. I drop the bucket into the bathtub with a curse and hot water splashes over the edge.

She rounds on me and grabs my hand, inspecting the burn. "Not much sense at all."

Blue sparkles leak into my palm and the painful heat disappears, replaced with the soothing drag of her fingers.

"This world is cruel," Reina says. "I know you couldn't ask for help because there was no one you could trust."

She looks at me and my heart leaps into my throat, making a big, ugly knot.

"I think we can trust each other, Jasper."

I huff. "Trusted me enough to let me get my face between your legs."

Her face goes shrewd. "Do you always do that?"

"Do what? Make women come?" I ask, my guts feeling like chum.

Her eyes pierce me. "Hide behind sarcasm."

I snort. "Hmm, nice one. Got me back."

She smiles. "Use the potholders next time."

I glance at the tools hanging beside the fireplace and notice the pair of massive mitts covered in singe marks. "That would've been smart."

She releases me and I turn to the fireplace, grabbing the potholders. I pour the partially spilled bucket into the bath and grab the next one. The boiling water hisses against the bare side of the bucket as I drain it into the steaming tub.

Reina appears across from me as I dump the last bucket and my breath catches in my chest. Her tanned legs press together as she clasps her hands in front of her—not hiding herself, but nervous. My eyes drift up her form without my input in the slightest until finally I realize I'm staring at a naked princess.

I turn back to the fireplace and put away the mitts.

"What? It's not as if you haven't seen it before, or tasted me…" she says and my dick, which had checked out a few minutes ago, is suddenly back in the fight.

"I thought you had better sense," I say, leaning my forehead against my arm on the mantle, trying to burn the thoughts out of my mind.

"Sometimes not, I guess," she says. I hear her hiss in a breath as she steps into the bath.

"That water was just boiling ," I remind her, barely keeping myself from whirling around and pulling her out.

"It feels great," she says, and then moans as she lowers herself deeper.

"You're insane," I mutter, trying to ignore the way her sounds have more blood pumping to my groin.

"Better than being boring," she says. "Is there soap?"

I glance around the mantle, not wanting to turn around for some stupid reason. I have already seen all of her, and sucked on, kissed, or tongued most of her. This isn't anything special, or different.

Except it feels like it is.

Something is definitely different now.

"I don't see any," I say, though I'm hardly seeing anything with my eyes since the vision of her coming undone under the stars is looping on repeat in my brain.

"How about a scrub brush? I need to get the blood off," she says.

I turn my hands over and see her blood, and the blood of the Men that tried to take her from me, caked under my fingernails. My eyes graze along the blood up to the fresh pink skin around my knuckles. I trace one of the long scars and remember that I'm only a few moments away from being on the other end of her magic. Except these days I've been on the other end of her healing magic a lot more.

"Jasper," she says in an annoyed, singsong way that makes me smirk.

"I don't see anything like that, either. However…" I reach into one of my pouches and remove the sea sponge I'd kept for cleaning myself. I toss the little yellow creature over my shoulder, and it lands in the bath with a splash.

"Oh, what's this?"

"It's called a sponge. I use it to scrub my skin off. Never thought it could peel so much. Very strange. Especially after too much sun exposure."

I hear the water move and I'm acutely aware of her grabbing the sponge, something that I've used to "scrape my skin off," and suddenly I feel quite disgusted with myself for offering it to her.

"Will you, um, help?" she asks.

"Help with what?" I ask, trying to deflect, or at least get her to second-guess what she's asking for.

"Scrub me?"

Gods damn it.

I want to, so much. I want to run my hands over her bare skin and show her that my touch can be gentle, and affectionate. The drive to prove to her that I can be a good mate is so strong, so overwhelming, I know I have to say no. It's not my better sense telling me to caress her skin and clean her thoroughly. It's not her better sense making her ask for it, either.

It's my Heat.

And if I stay in this room another second, I will break.

"I can't," I say, and turn for the door.

"Wait, please," she calls after me, the water sloshing around her body as she stands.

I stop, my hand still on the knob, ready to flee if the temptation is too great.

"I…" She huffs out a long sigh. "Thank you for the sponge."

Good girl. Came to her senses, at last.

"You're welcome."

I open the door and close it swiftly. The roar of the tavern below is loud, but it doesn't do anything to numb the sensations spiraling through me. Lust, greed, and an ache at the core of my heart that I can't put a name to. I lean against the door and slide down until I'm sitting with my elbows on my knees and my face in my hands.

This Heat better end quickly, or I just might rethink using Reina as bait.