CHAPTER ELEVEN

V innie

Evan is kissing me. His arms hold me, as if I’m something precious, and his mouth explores me. Lust surges through me, overwhelming my initial confusion.

I’m not going to stop him.

I’m not going to think about all the reasons why this is a super bad idea.

I’m just going to...enjoy.

And so, I do.

Our lips dance together, then I feel his tongue. My cells jump, my nerves rejoice. Everything is different and new and better.

I move my fingers along his back, ascertaining it’s him. His broad shoulders, his heat, his muscular frame.

Then he draws back.

Right.

Of course, he was going to pull back. Did he really initiate the kiss? Or is it my imagination? I try to remember, but my mind is fuzzy, as if I’m the person who just hit his head.

And oh God, Evan hit his head. I’m taking advantage of him.

He unzips the tent flap.

Shame surges through me. “I’m sorry—”

“Why?” Confusion ripples through his voice, then he grasps hold of my hand. “Let’s move this to a room with a lock.”

“Oh.” I stare at him. I can see him better now that the tent flap is open. He doesn’t look upset. In fact, he looks—

“Let’s go.” He pulls me up. We rush toward the steps, then I copy his tiptoe pace as we ascend the staircase.

Finally, we reach his room. He shoves me inside, then locks the door. Then our lips, our mouth, our hands are on each other again.

Evan is as tall as I am. I’ve never been with anyone who matches me in height. I’ve never been with anyone male, anyone with whom I’m not pretending. Pretending this is great, pretending I’m enjoying myself, all the while wondering...what if. What if I were clutching a man, if a hard chest were pressed against mine instead of a soft bosom?

I don’t hook up with women anymore, even though the temporary rotation of puck bunnies during away games seemed happy about the experience.

It’s been years since I’ve touched...anyone.

And now I’m touching the person I care about the most.

My heart zings and patters. It’s about to explode.

I move my hand through his hair, and it’s short and spiky, not long and glossy. It’s him. It’s really him. Just like the image I pretended for so long not to admire.

His kiss is strong and forceful. Whatever is happening between us affects us both. I let him lead me to the bed, then let him crawl over me. His legs straddle either side of me, and he unbuttons the flannel pajama top that he lent me.

He stops our kiss and lifts me up to tear off the pajama top. “This okay?”

“Yeah.”

He grins, then continues to kiss me. It’s amazing but...

“I don’t understand,” I say.

He hesitates.

“You don’t seem surprised,” I say.

“I am. You should have told me.”

I force my head into a nod, but my mind is whirling with other information. “But you seem...”

“Oh.” He flops down beside me. “You expected me to be more shocked.”

“I didn’t expect you to kiss me!”

“Do you mind?”

I laugh. “Never.”

He wraps an arm around me, then his hand flickers through my hair. The gesture is tender and unexpected. This is all unexpected.

“It’s possible I’ve been thinking about our kiss all day.”

“Sir Vinnie does it for you?” I ask.

“He absolutely does,” Evan says.

Warmth fills me.

“You’re my best friend. At least, you were.”

“I’m sorry I stopped coming over.”

“It’s okay. I understand now.” He squeezes my hand. “Next time something gets into your head, you tell me.”

“Okay,” I mumble into his chest.

He chuckles, and the motion reverberates through me.

Evan pulls away from me. “Wait.”

He crawls over the king bed, then flicks on the lamp on one of his side tables.

A soft glow pervades the room. I blink, staring at Evan’s hockey ass which is pointed directly at me.

“Evan?”

He starts to chuckle. “Sorry.” He flips onto his back. “I just wanted to see.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“You’re pretty hot, Mr. Defender.”

“So are you. Pretty sure your face is plastered on high school lockers.”

His face turns red. God, he’s cute.

Then, he pulls me toward him. I fall onto him, and he spreads his legs, so mine are in between. My length presses against his, and I groan.

“That feels good,” I murmur.

“Yeah?” His grin widens.

“So fucking good.” I press against him experimentally. His cock throbs and jerks beneath me, and I hold back a shudder.

“Need to feel all of you,” he wails.

I laugh, then pull off his pajamas. He’s naked beneath me. His muscles ripple beneath me, and that same pink flush that was on his cheeks is now on his chest.

I love it.

I love everything about him.

He’s perfect.

He’s thinner than I am. His frame is more suited to moving quickly than to taking pucks and intimidating rival teams.

I pull off my shirt.

“Don’t forget your pants.”

I laugh. “Okay. Thanks for the reminder.”

My cock sticks straight up. Precum makes the top glisten, but from the way that Evan’s Adam’s apple moves, he doesn’t mind.

I topple onto him, and our cocks press together. I inhale, as if by lingering on this breath, I can make the moment last forever.

Warmth swirls through me as our bare skin touches. Our bodies become slick with sweat. I move my length against his experimentally, amazed by the ache that reverberates through my body.

“This feels so good,” I moan. “Why does it feel so good?”

Evan chuckles. “Because it’s me, dude. You like me.”

“Yeah,” I admit, my voice rough.

His eyes soften. “You’re the best, you know that?”

My heartbeat quickens, enjoying his words, but I can’t meet his eyes. Too much shame already moves through me.

Evan pulls me tightly to him, wrapping his arms around me. He grabs hold of my hand, squeezes it, then taps my index finger. “You’re great with Stella. Seriously, great. No one plays with her like you do.”

“She’s an amazing kid.”

“I know.” He taps my middle finger. “And you took care of me. And I know you just wanted to avoid me. But you stepped up, and that’s because you’re awesome.”

I turn my head to him. His eyes are shining. “And the chemistry between us is off the charts.”

“Even though I’m a man?”

“I wouldn’t want you any other way.”

I duck in for another kiss, and he sucks my tongue. My cock jerks against Evan’s. Lust surges through me.

I pull myself away, then position my mouth over his cock. It’s glorious. Massive and throbbing and leaking.

Not quite as big as mine, but it’s better shaped. More elegant. With two perfectly symmetrical balls.

I swallow hard.

“Are you going to put it in your mouth?” Evan teases. “Because I’m totally down with that.”

“I’ve never done this before,” I admit.

His eyes go soft again. “You don’t have to do anything, DeLuca. Though I’d prefer if you stay in the bed with me.”

“There’s no question about that.” I run my fingers over his length, loving the way my hands become slick with his precum.

He lets out a deep moan.

The angle is all different from my own, but I’ve watched my fair share of pornography, and I’ve been on the other side.

I dip my head down, then take him into my mouth. My mouth stretches around his head, and my eyes flicker shut. I’m doing this. I’m sucking Evan’s most intimate body part.

My heart thunders, and I force more saliva around his head. I want to make this good for him.

“Vinnie...” His voice is rough. He’s enjoying this.

And that’s all I need.

I move a hand to his balls, moving them just how I like. Then I increase my suction and slide my mouth down his shaft. My nostrils flare, shocked I’m finally doing this, finally inhaling his masculinity.

I want to make this good for him.

He squirms beneath me. “I’m going to come if you keep doing that.”

I lift my head and give him a final suck. “I don’t mind.”

He gives a weak chuckle. “I don’t mind either. I like everything you do, dude. You...you get me. Now kiss me.”

I smile. I’m not sure how he’ll feel in the morning. But I’ll take these moments and savor them forever.

Dread still beats in my chest, because happiness like this never lasts, never when it’s never happened before.

But for now, I can still kiss him, still hold him, still worship every inch of his body.

And I tell myself it’s enough because it’s more than I ever dreamed of.