Chapter 32: Briar

brIAR

Gravel crunches underneath my feet. I walk further down the rough path while wondering where I am. Gazing at the lavender sky dotted with fluffy cotton candy blue clouds doesn't give me any clues.

Peering around lime green trees and navy boulders, I spot a white building in the distance. Picking up my pace, I wander closer until I can make out what it is. It's my old house. The inky black roof, cheery teal door, and expansive wraparound porch are just how I remember it.

What stops me in my tracks, though, is the woman sitting on the porch swing. Her strawberry-blonde hair cascades down around her slim shoulders in wild waves. A pretty pink sundress flatters her pale skin. Ice-blue eyes are trained on a book.

"Mama!" I shout as I sprint toward her. She only barely makes it to her feet before I crash into her. I wrap my arms around her as she hugs me back just as fiercely. Whereas she used to be taller than me, I now have a few inches on her.

"Baby! I missed you so much." My mom pulls back from the hug to get a good look at me. She brushes a stray strand of onyx hair out of my face. Tears shine in her blue eyes that are an exact match to mine.

"I missed you too, Mama, more than I'll ever be able to tell you." I'm barely able to get the words out through the happy tears clogging my throat. I don't ever want to let her go, terrified she'll disappear if I do.

"Oh, honey, I'm so happy to see you, but what are you doing here? It's not your time yet." A worried frown tugs Mama's lips down. She glances over at her companion for answers.

"I'm not sure, Evangeline." So focused on Mama, I completely missed the woman with deep brown hair and matching eyes sitting on the swing next to her.

"Um, hi?"

"Hello, child. It's nice to finally meet you. I've heard much about you. You can call me… Elissa." As she speaks, the woman stands up. Her rich purple gown billows around her when she moves.

"Nice to meet you, Elissa," I reply reflexively. My mom beams at my good manners.

"What's the last thing you remember, Briar Rose?" I smile at my mom using my first and middle name. She's the only one who ever called me that. It's been a long time since I've heard it.

I hunt around in my memories for the most recent one. I'm bombarded by flashes of the Wyldharts instead. Malachi kissing me. Bastian holding me against the hard planes of his chest with his hard-on shoved against my ass. Xander kneeling in front of me.

Welp. That's awkward. I'm definitely fantasizing about my professors in front of my mom. Red creeps up my cheeks. I duck my head to hide from Mama's knowing gaze.

Focusing back on finding my last memory, Patrick's angry red face pops up. I remember him giving me wolfsbane, turning into a wolf, and beating me almost to death. "I think I'm dead," I blurt. Then wish I hadn't when Mama's face falls.

"What happened, sweetie?"

"Um," I start, not wanting to tell Mama that her shitty husband is responsible. It's not her fault Patrick's an awful person. "Patrick kinda sorta beat me, which killed me I think."

"What!" Mama shouts, outraged. "That fucking spineless cunt! Why were you even with him in the first place?"

My mouth drops open in shock at hearing Mama cuss. While my mom bucked a lot of parenting trends, one thing she never did was swear in front of us. "I live with him, Mama. I have since… you know," I trail off, unable to say that she died out loud.

"What? Why don't you live with Aunt Abbie and Uncle Vale?" Mama's forehead is wrinkled in confusion.

My throat closes up, making it impossible to tell her why. After swallowing a few times, my voice comes out scratchy. "They didn't want to see me anymore." I miss them almost as much as my mom.

"That can't be right. I know they wanted you and Ava if anything happened to me." As my mom talks, the world flickers around the edges. Mama goes in and out of focus. Her wide eyes meet mine. "Tell me you've at least opened my locket?"

I shake my head. "No, Mama, I haven't figured out how to open it." But I wear it every day, only taking it off to shower.

"Oh, honey. No wonder your father isn't out here. He's going to be devastated he didn't get a chance to see you." My mom's icy eyes fill with sadness, but I don't understand why my dad would care. It's not like he was ever involved in my life. In fact, I don't have a single memory of him.

"Everything's all messed up, isn't it, baby?" I nod as my mom runs her hands through my hair. "I need you to listen closely, Briar Rose. You need to open my locket. To open it, drip three drops of your blood on the front. Then say, ‘ad astra per aspera.' That will unlock it."

I snort at my mom's cheesy code phrase. It fits her, though, since she always loved the stars. "I can do that, Mama."

As soon as I finish talking, a haze creeps up around us. It obscures the rest of the house, then Elissa, and then it crawls toward my mom. I hold onto Mama desperately, refusing to let the rolling fog take her away from me. "What's happening?"

"You're going back to where you belong. Don't be scared, honey. Everything's going to be okay. You just have to let go."

"No!" I shout, frantically shaking my head back and forth. "I only just got you back!"

"I was never back, baby. You were just visiting for a time. We will see each other again, I promise, but I need you to let go. Please. For me?"

"Promise?" I ask, voice hitching on a sob. Tears roll down my cheeks, my heart breaking all over again. I don't want to say goodbye another time. It almost destroyed me the first time.

"I pinky promise," Mama tells me with a watery smile. Taking a deep breath, I loosen my arms and peel my fingers off her bicep one by one. I meet her gaze one last time before I completely let go.

The last thing I hear as I'm consumed by the fog that blots out the orange sun is her choked-up voice saying, "I love you, Briar Rose."