Chapter 31: Xander

XANDER

"What herbs are you using?" I ask the mage as I try not to focus on the sight of my mate's broken body and just how badly I failed her.

Will I ever stop failing the people I care most about?

My heart stopped beating when I realized Briar was missing. It didn't start again until I heard the faint staccato rhythm of her heart. When I first saw her down here, I assumed the worst. It's hard not to when she looks worse than Bastian after a fight he deliberately lost.

Emmy turns back to me and raises one red brow. "Why? Do you even know what herbs are, wolf?"

I snort. "Yeah, mage, I do. I've worked with the pack doctor often." After we had to get Bastian patched up on a weekly basis in our teens, I asked the pack doctor if he could teach me a thing or two. Ten years later, I've become almost as knowledgeable as he is.

If I weren't destined to be a beta, I'd love being the pack doctor. But the pack's safer in someone else's hands. All I do is get people hurt.

"I'm impressed," Emmy responds dryly. "Guess you're one step more evolved than the average wolf."

I bark out a laugh, and Bastian cackles at her backhanded compliment. Kai looks down to hide his smile.

One of the enforcers growls at Emmy's insult. The sound cuts off as quickly as it started. Looking up, I see Blake, one of the enforcers, looking at the ground as my dad pins him with a fierce glare.

My eyebrows jump up at Dad's protectiveness of this mage. I'd love to know the story of how he knows her. That'll have to wait until Briar's better.

And she will get better. She has to. I can't live in a world without her. Almost losing her makes me reconsider staying away from her, but I know it's best for her if I do. She doesn't need my fuckups constantly dragging her down.

"I'm using a mix of yarrow, milk thistle, and ashwagandha, if you must know, wolf." After she finishes crushing everything, Emmy dumps the herbs in a bowl. She pours clear liquid from another jar into the bowl. Once everything's mixed, the mage chants under her breath. The mixture glows a deep blue briefly before returning to a murky green-brown color.

"Is that safe?" I inquire skeptically. Wolves and mages keep their distance from each other. I've never seen anyone perform magic in person. It's hard to trust something I don't really understand.

Emmy gives me a droll look. "Yes, it is. I've been doing this for a while. I'm pretty sure I know what I'm doing."

She looks like she's around the same age as Briar. Mages come into their power at sixteen, so she likely hasn't practiced for that long. "How old are you even?"

"Anyone ever tell you it's rude to ask a lady her age?" Emmy gently opens Briar's mouth wider as she sidesteps my question. She carefully pours her potion into Briar's mouth, and Briar reflexively swallows the concoction.

I open my mouth to press the mage on how old she is when I see Briar's fingers begin to straighten out. The bone poking out of her forearm disappears under her skin with a snap. Briar's legs also realign with a series of pops.

My mouth hangs open as I stare at the mage in surprise. "Told ya I'm good at this." Emmy flashes me a smug smile as she starts packing up her bag.

Familiar self-loathing tries to creep in at Emmy being the one to help Briar, while I'm helpless to do anything other than watch.

What do I have to offer her if someone can heal her better?

Fuck. I'm the worst sort of person, getting angry over Briar receiving the help she needs. My mate deserves so much better than me. I just have to hope I'm strong enough to step aside when the time comes.

Kai reaches for Briar's healed hand. Emmy's voice lashes out like a whip. "Don't!" Kai's hand freezes in midair. "She's not finished healing internally. Moving her hand will make her bones heal incorrectly."

With a horrified look, Kai returns his hand to her upper arm. Bastian and I keep our hands on the soft skin of Briar's other bicep. Emmy's potion helped Briar enormously, but our touch can speed up the rest of the healing she has to do. No one knows why a mate's touch helps healing. I, for one, am immensely grateful for it right now.

"Is there a spell you can do to see what bones have been broken?" I wonder out loud.

Emmy gives me a curious look. Her gray eyes squint like she's trying to see into my soul. I gulp. Hopefully she's not the soul-stealing type of mage. "Like what bones are currently broken?"

I shake my head. "No. I wanted to know if you can see healed breaks to determine which bones have been broken before." Briar handled her broken ribs almost too well. I have a sinking feeling that she's had quite a few of her bones broken before. She's very tight-lipped about her past, so I can't exactly ask her.

I absolutely should respect her privacy and let her tell us when she's ready, but I'm a nosy asshole. My need to know what Briar's been through overrides any concern for her privacy.

"I can," she says slowly. "Are you asking me to check Bri for prior fractures?"

I nod.

"Why?"

"Just a hunch I have."

Emmy assesses me for a beat longer. "Fine, I'll do it." Turning back to Briar, Emmy's eyes go unfocused while she chants softly. A deep-blue glow envelops Briar. After a minute or two of being in a trance, Emmy returns to herself. Her hazel eyes fill with anguish before she leans over and vomits. She's careful to move far enough away to keep Briar clean.

Blake stands behind the mage, and his face twists in a disgusted sneer. I don't know what his problem is, but he needs to cut it out.

Dad has the same idea as he barks, "Blake. Leave now." The enforcer looks up at my dad in shock. He complies with the alpha's order immediately, not having any other choice. The look of pure hatred he sends Emmy chills me to my core.

Once she's heaved until nothing else comes up, Emmy sits up and wipes her mouth with the back of her hand. Locking eyes with me, Emmy rasps, "She has hundreds of healed breaks. Almost every bone in her body has been broken at least once. Most of the fractures are concentrated on her fingers, wrists, collarbones, and ribs."

Tears run down Emmy's face as she grieves for the pain her cousin has suffered. She makes no move to wipe them away, instead running both of her hands tenderly through Briar's hair.

I sit back on my haunches in shock. This is so much worse than I feared. I thought Briar dealt with fractures maybe a dozen times before, not hundreds of times.

Hanging my head as shame washes over me, Briar's terrified face from when Kai yelled at her flashes through my mind. Is that what she looked like as Patrick broke every one of her bones over the years?

The thought of little Briar cowering away from a fully grown wolf shifter breaks something in me.

Where the fuck was I when my mate needed me?

Not there for her, as fucking usual.

"Who did this?" Emmy whispers. When no one answers her, she screams, "Who fucking did this to Bri?"

"Patrick, her stepfather," Dad croaks, head also hanging in shame. He shoves his fingers through his hair in agitation. My dad's midnight ocean eyes look up and lock on me. They're swimming with a soul-deep pain that mirrors mine.

"Aunt Evie remarried?" a bewildered Emmy asks. My dad nods. Emmy looks positively perplexed by the thought of her aunt marrying anyone other than presumably Briar's father. Briar never talks about her dad, so I wonder what the story is there.

At Briar's groan, I snap my gaze to her face. Her eyes are still shut, but her head is thrashing side to side.

"Shit! She shouldn't be waking up this early!" Emmy frantically rifles through her bag for something. "I don't have any sedative with me. Bri can't wake up yet. If she moves, she'll fuck up her insides."

The mage runs her hands through her curly copper hair, tugging at the ends as she reaches them. Turning to me, Emmy asks, "Do you have a picture of your infirmary?"

"I can look. Why?" I pull out my phone and hunt through my pictures to see if I have any with Dr. Stone.

"I need to portal Bri somewhere with sedatives. I'd prefer to portal her closer by to minimize stress on her body."

I finally find a picture of Dr. Stone and me in front of an infirmary bed. It's blurry, but it's the best I can find. "Will this work?" Shoving the phone at Emmy, I hold my breath as I hope it's what we need.

"Yeah, that's doable." The mage closes her eyes in concentration. Her lips move but no sound comes out. Nothing happens as the seconds tick by. I start to think Emmy's doing it wrong when a portal wooshes into existence behind her.

My mouth parts in shock. I've never seen a portal before. Very few people outside of mages ever encounter a portal. It has glowing navy sparks circling it. Those sparks jump and spit every so often. Peering around Emmy, I can see the exact infirmary room shown in the picture. Glancing at Bastian, I see he's just as shocked as I am. "This is wild!" he mouths. I nod in agreement.

Portals typically take a lot of magical energy, but Emmy doesn't seem to be affected by the strain of the portal. Opening her eyes, she grins at me. "You were starting to doubt me, weren't you?" I sheepishly nod. "Can you get the sedative ready, wolf?"

"Yeah. You want me to go through the portal?" I ask, eyeing it warily. While the portal's cool, I'm a little worried I'll get lost in another dimension.

"Yep. You'll be fine." Emmy rolls her eyes like I'm being dramatic.

I think it's sensible to be skeptical of traveling through a rip in the space-time continuum. Blowing out a breath, I stand up and approach it.

"I'm sure that's what you say to all the wolves you throw through your portals." I step one leg through. It feels like walking through maple syrup, thick and sticky. As quickly as possible, I move the rest of the way through the weirdly dense air of the portal. Looking down, I check my clothes to see if I'm covered in gelatinous goo. When I don't see anything, I turn back to the rip in space.

"I've never sent anyone other than a mage through a portal before," Emmy tells me casually. "I didn't even know if it would work. Good news, you're not dead! Or in a hellscape." She grins at me as I glare at her.

Shaking my head at the frustrating mage, I gather what I'll need to sedate Briar. Once she's knocked out, I can hook her up to an IV drip to keep her sedated as long as needed.

"A little help here!" Emmy grunts. I whirl around to see my mate floating in the air in front of the portal. She's wrapped in a haze of blue magic. I rush over but stop short of touching her, not wanting to hurt her more. "Can you gently guide her to the bed and push her down on it?"

Doing as the mage asks, I softly push on Briar's foot to get her over to the hospital bed. Once she's properly positioned, I apply a little pressure to get her settled on it. The blue glow surrounding Briar incrementally fades until it's completely gone.

"Thanks." Emmy wipes sweat off her forehead as she steps through the portal.

Turning around to close the portal, the mage pauses as Kai and Bastian come barreling through it. She gives them an unimpressed look before leaning back through the portal. "Anyone else planning to hitch a ride?" Emmy calls. "No? Going once, going twice, closed."

With a flick of her wrist, Emmy snaps the portal closed.

I busy myself with getting the dosage right for Briar. When I'm sure I've measured correctly, I inject her with the sedative designed specifically for wolf metabolism. We burn through drugs much faster than humans or even mages. "Now what?"

"Now, we wait. Bri either wakes up or…." Emmy breaks off, voice clogged with emotion. She brushes aside the tears escaping her eyes. "Or she doesn't."