Chapter 19

Tommy

Why the hellhadn’t I tried to talk to her before now? Even if I’d discovered she was pregnant and had a child, there would have been some hurt, but we would have gotten past it. If we’d just talked through things, whether it was just the two of us or maybe even with Carter, so many things would be different.

I didn’t harbor any illusions that Carter would still be alive—his demons went much deeper than unrequited love—but maybe he wouldn’t have done it quite so soon. Maybe he would have hung around a few more years so his kid would remember him. Or maybe not.

That was water under the bridge.

Right now, I was focused on Harley, trying to keep her eating and talking without upsetting her even though I still had so many questions. This was undoubtedly just as difficult for her as it was for me, but we had to keep pushing forward. If for no other reason than my sanity.

I couldn’t keep hating the love of my life.

She didn’t love me anymore, but we didn’t have to be enemies. There had to be a way for us to move on, even if we could only ever be friends.

It still broke my heart, but it didn’t hurt as much as it had before.

“Allisha suggested that this was Carter’s parting gift to us,” she said softly, startling me.

“What do you mean?”

She met my gaze as she nibbled on a piece of bacon. “He knew that by telling everyone about River, and me by extension, you and I would be forced to talk and clear the air. He had to have known how upset you would be when you found out, but he also probably knew it would force you to make a move, talk to me, and get answers.”

A prickle of shame washed over me.

Even in death, my best friend had my back.

“He worried about you, you know,” she continued after a moment. “If I’d returned his feelings, we would have been a couple, but he told me from the beginning that the three of us would have had to sit down and talk about it. He wasn’t willing to sneak around. Not for that.”

It didn’t make sense, but if you knew Carter, it did. He would worry about his friendship with me before almost anything else. Partly because of the band but also because of his attraction to me. It was twisted in a way, since he obviously had feelings for both Harley and me, but he was gone, so there was no point in trying to pick apart his psyche.

“But he was willing to hide his kid.”

“That was all me,” she said. “I wanted that. I didn’t want you to know because I was worried about not just how much it would hurt you, but how it would impact the band. You couldn’t truly take it out on me, so you would turn on Carter, and I couldn’t bear it. You two were like brothers. Not to mention the rest of the band.”

“But he wanted to be with me.”

She shook her head. “Please don’t be offended, but he wanted to fuck you. He was in love with me. And it broke his heart in so many ways because not only did I not love him back, not romantically, but he felt guilty for betraying you.”

“I hate that for him. I fucking hate this whole thing.” I pushed my plate back. “I hate that he’s dead. I hate that his kid is going to grow up without him. I’m really fucking pissed at him right now.”

She nodded. “Believe me, I understand. I’ve already gone through all of those emotions. I miss him but I’ll never truly forgive him for leaving his son. And me. But mostly his son.”

“The two of you were close since, uh, since River was born?”

“Very. We talked every day, multiple times a day. When he was on the road, he video called often, texted me, sent gifts, he was the only thing holding me together sometimes.”

“You’re stronger than that, Harley.”

She shook her head. “I don’t feel strong. Especially not in the beginning.”

“Strong enough to raise a little boy on your own, no matter how hard it is. Strong enough to ask for help once you realized you needed it. Strong enough to carry the burden of secrets just to protect someone who didn’t deserve it.”

Her eyes snapped to mine. “Don’t say?—”

My phone rang, startling us since I hadn’t thought to silence the ringer.

“Sorry.” It was Z calling, and I quickly sent the call to voicemail. He was probably calling to check in.

“I just was saying that—” Her phone went off this time, and the name on the screen was Madeline Aronson. That was odd because Madeline was the band’s attorney. She also handled the business end of anything to do with Carter’s estate.

Harley frowned. “I’ll call her back.” She sent the call to voicemail just as my phone rang again.

Z again.

“Maybe I should answer,” I said.

“Go ahead.” She watched me as I lifted the phone to my ear.

“Hey, man. Not a good time.”

“Sorry.” Z sounded genuinely apologetic. “But this couldn’t wait.”

“What’s going on?”

“We need to have a band meeting. Today. There’s an issue with our back catalog.”

“What do you mean?” I couldn’t fathom what he might be referring to. Our first two albums had been put out by a record label called Low Rider Records. We’d made so much money on those albums we’d financed the third on our own, as well as every album after that until the most recent one. But our current deal with Pretty Hart Records had been a strategic move that benefited all parties, and I couldn’t imagine it had anything to do with what he was talking about now.

“Did you know that Aurora went to work for Sound of Light Records?” he asked.

Aurora was our old manager. She’d had some sketchy behavior toward the end of Carter’s life, apparently trying to blackmail him with the threat of telling the band about River. I didn’t know the details at the time because we’d promptly fired her, and I honestly hadn’t given her a second thought in over a year.

“No,” I replied. “Why would I care what she’s doing?”

“They just made her President and CEO last week and she brokered a deal to buy Low Rider. She now has total control of the songs from the first two albums.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

Harley’s phone rang again, and she answered this time, getting up and walking a few feet away, ostensibly not to disturb me.

“Can we do it via video or do I have to come back to L.A.?”

“I think we can do it via video. And FYI, Harley is going to have to be on the call because she controls Carter’s interests.”

I glanced in her direction. “Yeah, no problem. She’s right here.”

“She’s right…” His voice trailed in confusion. “She’s at the rehab place with you?”

I chuckled. “It’s a long story. I’ll tell you about it later. Text me the deets for the meeting and I’ll talk to you then.”

“Assuming Harley’s available, we’re aiming for one o’clock.”

“She’ll be available. Do I need to contact my personal attorney or are we set?”

“I don’t think so. Madeline will be on the call with us.”

“All right. Talk then.” I disconnected just as Harley sat down.

“That was Madeline,” she said. “I don’t really understand what’s happening, but she said I have to be on this call at one o’clock?”

I nodded. “I don’t know if you know what Aurora did.”

She shook her head. “I know Carter had some heated phone calls with her just before he died, but he told me not to worry about it.”

“She was trying to blackmail him.”

“For what?”

“Well, she and Z had an affair. I guess they’d slept together on multiple occasions over the years, after she started managing us. He liked her because she was older, smart, and supposedly had the band’s best interests at heart with no pressure on him. From his perspective, it was the equivalent of safe sex. So to speak.”

She snorted. “I’m guessing that turned out to not be true.”

“I’m assuming you know the story about when Presley got pregnant and tried to reach Z to tell him about the baby?”

She nodded. “Yeah, and the band’s management wouldn’t give him her messages.” She closed her eyes as understanding dawned. “Oh. That was Aurora.”

“Exactly. She and Z had rekindled things and I guess this time she was looking for more than casual sex. So she kept Presley at bay. Anyway, when Z eventually found out, he was pissed and wanted to fire her. She had Carter on her side, telling him if he didn’t defend her, she would tell everyone about River. Because of the money involved and the trust he set up, she’d found out about the baby, so she was controlling Carter to a degree.”

“Oh shit. He never said a word.”

“Anyway, eventually he came to his senses and told her to fuck off. Then he died and it was moot. Regardless, we fired her. Well, now she was just made the President and CEO of Sound of Light Records, who are a pretty big deal.”

“Yeah, they have some big names on their roster.”

“Exactly. And they just bought Low Rider Records.”

She squinted, and I could practically see the wheels turning. “Wait… that’s your original record label.”

“Yup.”

“And she now runs the label that owns…what? Your original albums?”

“Obviously, we have the right to the music, but they now own the masters. They have a huge say in what we can and can’t do with the music.”

“But if you own the music, what’s the difference?”

“It’s a little murky, but since they own the masters, any time those songs are played or streamed they make money. With Low Rider, we had a bit of control over some of those decisions. Now, with Aurora at the helm, we don’t. Technically, they could even block us from performing songs from those two albums.”

“Oh my god. That includes ‘Shiny Pieces’ and ‘Break Your Promise,’ right?”

I nodded. “Yup.”

‘Break Your Promise’ was one of our biggest hits, and the song we always played in an encore.

Her eyes narrowed. “Oh hell no. That’s taking food right out of my baby’s mouth!”

I laughed at her protectiveness. “Out of all our mouths. Not that any of us are going hungry any time soon.”

“No, but it’s the principle!”

“Exactly.”

“Fuck her and the horse she rode in on!”

“No thanks. But I appreciate the sentiment.”

“Just tell me what to do. Fuck that bitch.”

I grinned.

That was the Harley I knew and loved, and it was nice seeing her again.