Chapter Seventeen

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Riven

Icouldn’t believe I was doing this. Camping shouldn’t be that big of a deal, but to me, it was. It felt like giving another piece of myself to Parrish. When I’d gotten out, I hadn’t planned to ever get close to anyone again, hadn’t planned to connect with anyone, yet here I was, fucking the brother of the person who had gotten me thrown into prison. Going away with him for the weekend and…quietly being excited about it.

We drove to his place first, collecting Parrish’s supplies, packing food, drinks, and shit like that. Afterward we went to mine so I could pack up too. When I went into the house with a backpack, I found Grandma working on one of her puzzles.

She frowned. “You going somewhere?”

Shit. Did she think I was going to bail on her? That I was skipping town? “I’m going camping with Parrish. We’ll be close. If you need anything, call me, and I’ll come right back.” Now her frown turned into a smile. “It’s not a thing, Grandma.”

“I didn’t say it was. Do you need food? Drinks? I can give you some money to pick some things up.”

I shook my head. “We got it. We’re grown men. We can get our own supplies.” The thing was, before I got locked away, when I was friends with Rex, I would have taken her up on her offer. I would have probably let her give me money and would have done shitty things with it. I hated myself for whom I’d been, for the mistakes I made. How did she love me so much? “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Everything. Who I was. I know I’m not much better now, but—”

“You shut your mouth right now, Riven McKenna. Stop putting yourself down. You’re better than you give yourself credit for.”

I nodded even though I didn’t believe her, then gave her a hug, holding on for longer than usual, kissed her temple, and left.

*

It was beautifulup here. This was one of the only things I loved about living in Southern Oregon. There was beauty everywhere you looked. We were only about forty-five minutes from home, but we were in a secluded area, no one around us for miles, a lake a short walk away.

We hadn’t left until late, so once we arrived, we set up our tent and got going the small grill Parrish had brought so we could make dinner.

We made burgers before sitting in camp chairs and eating, nature around us, the sounds of squirrels and other small animals scurrying through leaves.

I was there because of him, and wanted to thank him for that, but I didn’t exactly know how.

“There’s not much that’s better than this,” Parrish said, and took a swig of his beer.

Hell, I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d had one. My bottle sat beside me, but I hadn’t drunk any of it yet, didn’t even know if I wanted to. Part of me wanted to get that back. There was nothing wrong with relaxing at the end of a hard day with a cold beer, but I’d also used to drink a lot, and back then if I wasn’t drinking, I was doing drugs, usually both. I’d struggled getting clean in prison, and going down that road again wasn’t something I wanted to do.

“You’re being quiet.”

“I’m always quiet,” I told him.

Parrish nodded in agreement. “You speak up when something matters, though.”

“Yeah, right.” Was he crazy? How many of the bad things from the past wouldn’t have happened if I’d just opened my mouth?

“Tell me something good, Riv. I want to hear about a time you were happy.”

Right nowwas the first thought that drifted through my head, the truth of those two words nearly knocking me out of my chair. I wasn’t happy, not really, but I was as close to it as I ever remembered being. Or maybe content was the right word, though that didn’t totally fit either. Emotions were fucked up and confusing and didn’t always make sense.

“I can’t think of anything. Jesus. Why do you gotta ask dumb questions?”

He chuckled. “It’s not a dumb question, you jackass. It’s a sweet one.”

Not for the first time, he made me roll my eyes. “Now you’re sweet, huh?”

“I’ve always been sweet for the right person. That doesn’t mean I can’t be a real dickhead too.”

He wasn’t. Or if he was, it was always for a good reason.

“Tell me about a time you were happy,” Parrish said again, making it obvious he wasn’t going to let this go.

I pushed my ball cap up so it sat higher on my head and scratched. “I don’t know, man.” But then something came to me. It was so silly, so ridiculous, I wasn’t sure I even wanted to mention it.

“What is it? You have something. I can tell.” He kicked my chair, so I leaned over and punched his leg. “Ouch, you bastard.”

“You started it.”

He gave me a pleading look, the flames of the campfire dancing in his eyes, luring me in.

“Hell, I guess it would be this one time on my grandma’s birthday. I think I was about fifteen. I wanted her to have a special day. I told Rex I couldn’t do shit, but I didn’t tell him why. I got up early and made her breakfast. It felt like something a little kid would do, but I’d realized I’d never even made her breakfast before.” Fifteen years old and had never woken my grandma, the person who raised me, with food? I’d been a dick.

“Go on.”

“So that’s what I did. I made her waffles with strawberries and whipped cream because it’s her favorite. I’m not sure how good it was because I’m a shit cook, but she was so happy, I decided to spend the whole day doing all her favorite things with her. We gardened and worked on puzzles. She taught me how to crochet, something I can still do. I made her dinner too—used her fried-chicken recipe, and it came out pretty good. We just…talked and laughed. Like I said, she was so happy that it rubbed off on me. Made me feel good, if that makes sense.” I massaged my chest, right over my left pec, discomfort growing there.

“Do you know what you just did?” Parrish asked, the question drawing my gaze to his. Was this a trick question?

“Told you what you wanted to know?”

“I asked you to tell me about a time when you were happy, but your story is about when you made someone else happy. And I get it. Like you said, doing something for her made you feel good, but you can’t even name a moment that was just for you. That tells me all I need to know about you, Riv. You’re something special.”

“I’m not shit.”

“You are to me.” He stood and closed the small distance between us. I looked up at Parrish as he leaned down, palming my cock through my shorts. “You know why we’re out here? Because I remembered one time you told me you like camping, and I wanted to make you happy, just for you, because you deserve it.”

I didn’t know what to say to that, had never had anyone say something like that to me before. But then, that was the kind of man Parrish was. Somehow, he’d lived around the same bad shit we all had, but he’d risen above it. He was better than it and always had been.

“You gonna give me this? I want your dick. Wanna ride your cock right out under the stars so I can make you feel like you’re a part of them.”

I trembled. My dick swelled under his touch, like every drop of blood in my body rushed straight to my groin. My heartbeat felt like it was in my dick. It’s what pulsed with life and kept me alive because Parrish wanted it so fucking much. Because he made me feel things when I didn’t think I was capable.

He was wearing a pair of basketball shorts, so I tugged those down, taking his underwear with them, then leaned in to nuzzle his groin. He smelled musky, like sweat, desire, and man, and I was thankful for it. Wanted this moment to be honest and raw the way Parrish made me feel. Wanted it to be dirty too.

I licked his balls, felt his cock twitch against my cheek. He stood up straight, took my hat off, and tangled his fingers in my hair.

“I want you to fuck me,” Parrish said again.

“I will, but I wanna taste you first.” My tongue made a journey from the base of his shaft to his glans. I paid extra attention to that spot, lashing it with my tongue before taking his salty dick into my mouth.

I breathed him in, savored the scent and feel of him, two bodies close to each other in a way I hadn’t had in so long before Parrish. In a way that felt different with him, something I didn’t want to think about, so I fought to seal that truth up so it couldn’t hurt me, or more realistically, so I couldn’t hurt him.

“Fuck my mouth. I want to feel it,” I said, or did I beg? Why had my voice sounded so needy? So pleading? Like I would die if I didn’t have Parrish’s cock hammering my throat.

He remembered I like camping. He asked to come out here just for me.That meant something to me. This world was filled with shitty people who didn’t think about others, but in all the ugliness, Parrish did—about me, about Becca, about his nieces. About my grandma when I was away, and I was sure about hundreds of other people.

“You want it? Want me to fuck your pretty mouth?”

I wasn’t sure pretty was the word I would use, but… “You have the sentiment right,” I said when I pulled off.

Parrish cupped my face gently, like I was precious or fragile and not the kind of man I was. He stood between my legs, brushed his thumb over my lips before he held the base of his cock and traced them with that too, his precum painting me and tasting like salt and addicting.

“Tilt your head up for me, Riv. Let me look into your eyes while I take your mouth. Then I’ll give you my ass. Jesus, I still can’t believe I’m here with you like this. I want to nut just looking at my dick stretching your lips.”

His words made my dick throb, vibrating through my whole body. When our eyes met, I tried to show him the words I couldn’t say with a mouth full of dick. Do it. Give it to me. I wanna feel it.

Parrish grinned, half mischief, half sex, and I knew he understood what I wanted. Hand still on my face, he thrust his hips forward. The head of his prick hit the back of my throat, making me gag, but that’s what I needed. To gag on his cock over and over and over again before I made his hole mine.

I reached out and held his tight ass, felt the muscles flex beneath my fingers while Parrish pumped his hips. I was in a rhythm now, alternating between swallowing around him as best as I could and letting him choke me with his dick. It made my throat burn, my eyes water, but it also gave me something, eased the wild storms inside me, but maybe that was just something about Parrish. This whole thing…and from the first day he’d come to my house, I’d been different with him. I was so tired of fighting it. I’d spent my life fighting—myself, other people, Rex, my instincts that were always telling me to do the wrong thing. But all that faded to the background when I was with Parrish.

His balls slapped against my chin, his cock punishing, but his gaze so gentle. When his fist tightened in my hair and he kept his dick lodged in my throat, I panicked, tried to pull away, fought to breathe, but Parrish didn’t let me go on my terms, he let me go on his, and…fuck, why did that make my prick swell even more? Why did it make my whole body feel primed and insatiable?

“Again,” I told him, and he obeyed. Over and over and over again, making my throat his, taking control over me in a way I had never given to anyone before. He controlled whether I breathed or not, chose to give me air when he knew I needed it. There was no one I would trust with that like I did Parrish. No one I would crave it from the way I did with him.

“I gotta stop, or I’m gonna empty my balls before you take my ass. I want to come with your dick inside me.”

I shook with need for him. I felt feral, like I couldn’t control myself when I shoved to my feet and slammed my mouth down on his. My tongue immediately pushed into his mouth, taking over what was mine. Jesus, had kissing always been this good? I didn’t think so, couldn’t ever remember it being like this. Not with anyone else.

Parrish’s fingers worked the button and zipper on my jeans while my tongue chased the pleasure of his mouth. He shoved them down, and I forced myself to pull away enough to get my T-shirt over my head before I was on him again, kissing him and backing him up. I didn’t know how we didn’t trip and fall, but we didn’t, and eventually we were at the picnic table, right where I wanted him.

I tugged his shirt off, licked the drops of sweat on his collarbone and down his chest.

“Fuck, Riv. Love having your mouth on me.” He fisted the strands of my hair again, giving them a tug until it burned.

We managed to work all my clothes off, then stood there, Parrish’s ass against the metal table. He danced his fingers over the freckles on my shoulders. “I love these. I wanted to kiss them when I was younger. Wanted to spend the whole day counting each and every one of them.”

“Fuck,” I gritted out, not knowing what else to say. I didn’t have deep words inside me, not the way he did. Still, his made my heart pump harder. “I want you right here, bent over this table.”

“Then take me.”

Shivers ran the length of me, my body feeling like it would burst under the pressure of how much I wanted him.

I rushed to the tent, grabbed the lube and a condom, Parrish right where I left him, wearing nothing but sun-kissed skin and a smile.

I pressed my body to his, unable to keep myself from taking his mouth again. Parrish moaned into the kiss, feeding me all his sounds, and I swallowed them greedily. He thrust against me, our cocks rubbing together while I gave him this thing that was impossible to keep from him—my mouth always starving for his.

I was breathless when I pulled away, then stepped back so I could turn him around. He went easily. I kissed each knot of his spine, working my way down his body. When I knelt behind him, Parrish widened his stance, spreading his legs and bending over to give me better access.

With urgent fingers, I slicked up, then watched his body accept my first digit. Parrish pushed back against me, riding my hand. “Look at that. Look how much you want me. Not even my cock yet, and you’re going wild for it. Your hungry little hole was dying for me to be inside it. Wasn’t it?”

“Yes…God yes,” Parrish hissed out.

My dick throbbed, my gaze riveted on his ass while I worked a second finger inside. I fucked him with them, watched him swallow me up, played with his prostate, and Parrish pushed up on his toes like he was losing his mind.

I gave him a third finger, bit his ass, licked the sweat off his skin again because it felt primal and filthy and there was nothing I wanted more than to possess him in every way possible.

“Jesus, that’s enough. Give me your dick. Fuck me, Riv.”

How could I say no to that? I stood, suiting up and slicking my dick with lube. I bent him over more, licked and sucked his nape while I thrust my hips forward, filling him in one swift movement.

“Riven!” Parrish cried out, my name echoing around us.

I held his hips, fucked him like it was the last thing I would ever do, like I had something to prove, and maybe I did. My fingers bit into his skin, Parrish rambling, telling me, “Harder…more…” mixed with words I couldn’t even make out. His body was so hot, so tight, a glove made for my cock to possess. My orgasm was right there, teetering on the edge, but I wanted this to last, so I pulled out.

“What the hell. Fuck me!”

“I am.” I chuckled, turning him. “Don’t move,” I ordered because I wanted to take care of him while I took him. I grabbed a blanket from the tent and laid it over the table, his eyes going soft, like he’d been starving and I’d offered him food.

“Fuck, Riv.” He sat on the table, legs spread, ass hanging right on the edge.

I fit myself between his thighs again, pushed into him slowly this time, inch by inch sinking into his tight ass. When I was buried deep, his dick twitched, precum leaking onto his belly. I pulled back and thrust again and again, holding his hips. Parrish’s head dropped back, Adam’s apple bobbing while he gave me his body.

I saw his balls tighten, wrapped a hand around his shaft and stroked once, twice, before his nuts drew up and he ground out my name while he spurted his release all over his stomach. His ass tightened around me, pulsed and throbbed, pulling my jizz from my balls, and I lost myself to the pleasure and filled the condom.

“Christ,” he said breathlessly. “Best I’ve ever had.”

Yeah…me too. I licked some of his release from his abs. Parrish smiled as I did so, but then I scooped some up and fed it to him. He let it sit on his tongue, as if he knew what I wanted. This time when I leaned over and kissed him, we were sharing his cum between us, the taste of Parrish’s pleasure on both our tongues.

When I pulled back, we hadn’t rubbed it all off between us, so I took the rest on my fingers, then reached down and pushed two cummy digits into his ass.

“Jesus…that’s so hot. Next time I want you to eat it out of my hole.”

Next time. Because there would be one. There was no denying it. Parrish made me feel alive, and until I’d experienced it with him, I hadn’t known I’d spent my whole life feeling like I wasn’t breathing.