13. Pallas

Iawoke to the sound of Jun's strained voice. "Tori, wake up!" He was shaking her by the shoulders when I ran over.

Shelooked horrible. She was sweating profusely, and her face was twisted in pain. She was moaning and clutching her arms, chest, and face. Her nails bit into her skin like she was trying to claw it off.

"WAKEUP!" Jun screamed at her, but the force of it knocked me backward, and the entire ship shook with its power. Tori's eyes flew open, and for a moment, they glowed an eerie green before fading back into their normal deep grey.

Jundoubled over, coughing, and both Tori and I were immediately at his side. But the princess' hands were shaking as she tried to steady Jun.

"I'm…fine…" he croaked; his voice was rough as if he had been screaming for hours.

"What the hell was that?!" Avlyn swung down from the rigging overhead, landing with surprising grace for someone their size.

"Words of Power." I hadn't really meant to say it out loud. I'd always suspected that Jun might use them to concentrate his voice into something even more powerful. ButHadeon had tried too hard to control Jun, and that had stifled his magical development. Perhaps with the collar gone, he could finally discover the true limits of his ability.

Butas I looked to see Avlyn's reaction, I saw they weren't looking at Jun or me, but at Tori, who was still sickly blanched. Her skin was clammy with deep circles set under her eyes. But she was still trying to comfort Jun the best she could without touching him.

Avlynwalked over to her. "Are you alright?" They reached down to touch her shoulder, and she flinched.

"I'm fine." She leaned away, putting space between them. "I just need a moment. Pallas, is Jun alright?" She was asking me?

"Yes, he just isn't used to using his power this way." But he would learn, and I would help him. I hadn't been able to save him, but this I could do.

Torigave the slightest nod of her head before bolting to the railing of the ship, and she heaved the contents of her stomach over the edge. Avlyn followed her. AsJun stopped coughing, I heard Tori mumbling, "I'm fine, just seasick." Liar.

Thesun had just breached the sky, its pale rays barely making it through the thick mist of the sea. Jun had settled down with a jug of water, and Avlyn leaped up to the upper deck, taking back over at the helm. I watched as their muscular legs bounded up the stairs but froze when they turned around, locking eyes with me. Their face looked so soft despite the high cheekbones and defined jaw. They were so at ease sailing these open waters and so different from the warrior I had seen on the beach. The warrior who had saved my life. I felt my heart race as their amber-colored eyes held my gaze for a moment before I dropped my chin to look away.

Islowly shuffled over to Tori, who had her forehead resting on the back of her hands on the railing of the ship. She stayed hunched over, but I didn't think she was going to vomit again.

"What happened in your dream?"

Herhead shot up; her eyes were piercing despite the unease that still lay beneath them.

"Nothing." She always gave herself away.

"Obviously not." Her gaze hardened, but the ship rolled underneath us as Avlyn shifted our course, and Tori turned green before she leaned over the railing and vomited again.

Ireached out and gently pulled her hair back, trying to ignore the clenching of my stomach at the sound of her expulsion. Eventually, she stopped and rested her forehead on her hands again.

"I really hate boats," she mumbled.

Fora few more waves, we stood there in silence, but for once, I was the one to break it.

"Dreams are one place that magic still lives most vividly in our world. But it's a fickle magic. Most dreams can mean absolutely nothing. But some… some can mean everything."

"How do I tell the difference?" she asked without raising her head.

Ididn't answer her question. "What did you see?"

"I thought you weren't going to help me, Pallas." She was right. I was about to pull away when she spoke again. "I've been dreaming of Abraxas. ButI know it's more than a dream. It's like I'm connecting to him, talking to him even though he's not with me."

Iknew the feeling all too well. Hadeon haunted my dreams and often even my waking hours. Tori hadn't explained, but I had my suspicions about her connection with Abraxas. She had summoned his dragonfire in the cave. They were linked in a way outside of her control. How horrible to be unable to escape his grasp, even in sleep. Hadeon had been terrible to me, but Abraxas was a monster.

Iset my hand gingerly on her back and whispered to her so the commander wouldn't overhear. "He's gone, Princess. We've left him behind. You never have to be with him again."

Herhead shot up, anger filling her eyes, but they softened again as she beheld me. "I love him, Pallas."

"I saw what he did to you at those parties. Both in Xyr and Koron. The way he treated you. That's not love, Tori." I would know.

"It was all an act. We wanted it to look that way. That was part of the plan. ButI love him, Pallas, and he loves me. I have no doubt of that."

Iobserved her. How often had I convinced myself of the same thing? For centuries I had. But there was something in her eyes, something so true I couldn't ignore it. Could it be that somehow, she and Abraxas had…?

"What was your dream about?" I asked again.

Shamecrossed her face. "He… killed me. Alright, I know how that sounds! Don't make that face. I can see you don't believe me, but I think I can show you." She held her hand out to me, palm turned upward. I didn't move. She didn't close the gap but begged, "Please, let me show you." I didn't respond and saw the frustration in her eyes.

"Pallas, you can help us. It's clear you have more knowledge about Hadeon than almost anyone. And you also seem to know a great deal about magic as well. Please help us. Please do some good with your knowledge."

Some good. The memory rose from the bowels of my mind where I had stored it away. Jun's screams, his desperate pleading. How he clawed at the collar as it snapped around his neck. How his eyes darted to me before they dulled into obedience. Me standing there, doing nothing. Doing absolutely nothing.

"And what you are doing is right?" I asked. "What, because you love Abraxas? Love is a fickle thing that comes and goes like the wind. It blinds you to the truth right in front of your eyes. A vacant thing that fills you with hope only to tear it away one small piece at a time until you have nothing left of yourself." I had said too much, revealed too much. I saw it in Tori's eyes.

"Pallas, let me show you." She held up her hand again. The frustration was gone from her face, and I saw the hints of pity below.

Thedeep part of me that was dark and sharp, all claws and teeth, tore at my heart. It was nothing but rage and hurt, seething with jealousy. Don't look, it said. Don't let her show you the happiness you can never have. But she didn't force me, and her eyes looked so much like Jun's at that moment. The animal was subdued, as it always was for him. I nodded to her.

Sheclosed the gap between us, and her palm landed on my chest. A golden light flooded from her, mixing with the beams of the morning sun. I felt warm and safe in a way that I hadn't in centuries. I felt the kiss of a lover who desired nothing more than my joy and laughter. I felt the arms of a mother who held me to her heart as she sang me to sleep. I felt the embrace of a friend who knew me better than I knew myself. It was the rising sun and evening twilight and the dance of the stars and light of the moon. It was the endless sky and sleeping earth.

Tearsstreamed down my face, tears I hadn't let flow in years. I fell to my knees and clutched my face in my palms. It wasn't fair that she got to feel this when I had suffered so long. Yet, I was so grateful to her for sharing it with me, even for this brief moment. She released her hand, but still, the feeling lingered like the warmth that clings to stone after the sun has faded. I felt her arms around me, and I leaned into her and sobbed. She stroked my hair and cooed at me.

ThenI felt another pair of arms. "It's alright, Pallas." Jun was touching me in a way I hadn't dared hope for in months. That golden light seemed to glow in my heart just a bit longer.

The commander was shouting orders at Tori, and all she did was shout back snarky retorts, but the sails got pulled, eventually. In the distance, I could see the dark shore of the DragonKingdom emerging from the mist. Our boat bobbed in place, the sails stowed, but the commander assured us we wouldn't have to wait long.

Theywere correct. The sun had barely moved in the sky when a huge, dark vessel approached us. It didn't approach from the shore as it had been patrolling the bay. As the ship neared, I could see countless DragonArmy soldiers, clad in their pitch-black armor, lining the edge of the ship along with the sailors. Many had long bows drawn back so that the silver heads of arrows flashed in the morning light. They were all trained on us.

Icould feel the fear in my chest growing as they approached. For how many people had this been the very last thing they saw before their untimely demise? The air grew colder around me, and I shivered.

Thecommander strode to the railing of our much smaller ship boldly, hands on their hips and shoulders spread wide.

"I'm glad to see you bastards can keep up the patrol schedules without me to beat them into you," they called out to the opposing army.

Arustle went through the ranks, and someone from the ship shouted, "Commander?"

"Who the hell else would it be, sailing in from the islands like this? Now get us to shore!" I could see bodies on the ship moving about, trying to haul over a plank to connect the vessels. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a great dark shape swoop down from the upper deck, holding on to a single rope. He slammed down onto the deck of our boat, armor rattling, and the entire deck threatened to crack beneath him. He was as tall as the commander, and even more broad. He stood to his full height, and I couldn't help but shrink back as his hand came to rest on the hilt of his sword.

Hereached up to take off his helmet. A sea of shiny chestnut waves tumbled out from below, revealing a handsome, strong face.

"Commander, is that really you?" He approached Avlyn cautiously, but that caution faded away quickly. "Is she with…"

Thegiant was struck from the side by the princess. For a moment, I thought she intended to fight him, but I saw she had wrapped him in an aggressive hug instead.

"I'm here, Kaleos. You won't be rid of me that easy!" Kaleos' armor strained as he returned the princess's embrace tenfold. I heard her groan as he squeezed the breath from her lungs.

"Hey, mind the bones, Kaleos!" But the man didn't let her go. A plank had been set between the two ships, and quickly, more bodies joined the crushing embrace. The exuberant shouting nearly deafened me.

Ibacked away from the joyous group, and that creature in my belly hissed with jealousy, clawing at my ribs in anger. I felt soft fingers lace with mine and looked up to see Jun smiling.

"It seems like she finally found it after all these centuries," he whispered.

"What?" I asked.

"Home."