Chapter 11

Caden

By the timethat I make it home, it's well after ten and I take a deep breath as I park my bike outside and head up the front porch steps.

The front door swings open and I blink in surprise as Astrid flies out the door and throws herself at me. She's sobbing so hard and clinging to me. I look around, trying to find the threat and my wolf is on high alert inside of me.

"Are they inside?" I ask her and she just cries harder.

I hold her tighter, peering into the dark house.

"Astrid, honey. Who hurt you?" I ask, pulling her back so that I can scan her face.

She swipes at her tears and the sad look slowly starts to turn to fury.

"Where were you? Are you alright? Why didn't you call me back?" She asks, firing the questions at me.

"I was at the hospital. I'm fine, why are you crying?"

"I thought that you were dead!" She shouts at me, the sadness gone and completely taken over by anger. "I called you like ten times and you never responded. Jude has been home for hours! No one knew where you were or what had happened to you. Do you have any idea what the last twelve hours have been like for me?"

My wolf snaps at me and I wince.

See? I told you that we never should have even left this morning,he snarls.

"Astrid, I'm so sorry. Come inside so we can talk."

It's clear that she wants to argue with me, but she turns and storms into the house.

"Is everyone okay?" She asks before she takes a seat on the couch.

There's a pillow and blanket there and it's obvious that she's been camped out on the couch all day, waiting to hear from me.

You're an idiot,my wolf growls.

"Our guy is fine. He was shot in the shoulder, so the bullet missed all internal organs. He'll be sore for a while, but he'll be okay."

She nods tersely and I swallow hard.

"I was at the hospital until he was out of surgery and I talked to him. Then I went for a drive."

"A drive," she says, her voice flat.

"Yeah, I needed to clear my head. My phone died pretty early in the day. I forgot to charge it last night," I tell her and her cheeks turn a light shade of pink as she remembers what distracted me from plugging my phone in.

She looks away and I scoot closer to her on the couch.

"I wanted to call you, but I didn't have your phone number memorized. I sent one of the recruits out for a phone charger, but he never came back. I found out when I was leaving the hospital that his mom had a heart attack and he was a few floors down in the same hospital."

"Is she okay?"

"Yeah, I checked in on him before I left. I'm still sorry. I should have come straight home, I just thought that you would already be asleep and I needed to clear my head. That still doesn't excuse me not reaching out."

"I was so worried," she whispers and I swallow hard.

"I'm sorry, Astrid. I swear, it will never happen again."

She still looks so upset and I can see her turning some big thought over in her mind.

"I don't think I can do this," she whispers and my wolf and I both freeze.

"What? Do what?" I ask, desperation and panic bleeding into my words.

"This," she says, motioning between us. "I think I got swept up in you and the shifter thing, but then yesterday, it just really opened my eyes."

"What did?"

"You just ditched me. You left and never bothered to call or check-in. I was worried about you and you were so cold. I mean, I went from the best night of my life to being scared and alone, and you didn't even bat an eye. I can't do this again. What happens the next time that the MIdnight Rebels start something? What if you're the one they hurt next?" She asks, her voice breaking.

Tell her everything,my wolf orders me and I swallow.

We're losing her.

If you fuck this up, I will kill you,my wolf snarls at me.

"It won't happen again," I promise her and she just shakes her head, tears falling onto her cheeks.

"Astrid, I wasn't thinking clearly," I start, getting up and kneeling in front of her so we're eye to eye. "When I heard about the shooting, I freaked out. As soon as Jude told me, I was back overseas, finding out that another friend of mine had died. It just took me back to a dark place, and I'm sorry for that. That's why I went for a drive. I didn't want to burden you with all of that. I know that the last few days have been a whirlwind for you and I didn't want to add anything else to the mix until you were settled."

"It's not a burden. I want to be there for you. We're supposed to be mates, right? We're supposed to be close."

"We are. I'm sorry, Astrid. I'm an idiot, but I promise that it won't ever happen again."

She studies me for a moment and I reach up, wiping the tears away.

"How are you feeling now?" She asks me quietly.

"Alright," I tell her honestly. "It took me a while to stop seeing my friends every time I looked at Kincaid in his hospital bed. I think… I think that I should talk to someone. I thought that I was over things, but today proved that I"m not," I admit to her.

"I can help find a therapist," she offers, her hands coming up and cradling my face in her palms.

"There's a VA close by. I'll look into attending some group therapy and other services there."

She nods and I turn my head, kissing her palm.

"I love you, Astrid. More than anything. You have me wrapped around your finger."

Tears form in her eyes and she swallows.

"I love you too. I was just so scared today. I can't lose you."

"You won't," I promise her.

She gives me a small smile, and I give her a relieved smile in return.

"I love you, mate."

"I love you too."

"Let's go upstairs," I whisper.

"For what?"

"We need to talk and make some plans."

We head upstairs, and I pull her down onto the bed with me.

"Now, when do you want to get married, and how many kids should we have?" I ask her as I get her settled next to me.

She laughs and I grin; my wolf finally relaxing inside of me as my mate and I plan out our life.