Chapter 22
twenty-two
Rose – One Week Later
I smile as the customer leaves me a tip. I grab it and slip it into my apron, trying not to be preoccupied, but it’s hard to stay focused.
It’s been a week since I saw Noah.
After spending the night in each other’s arms, he woke me up the next morning, kissing me all over before reminding me I was his, giving me several mixed emotions that I can’t seem to decipher.
“We aren’t done, Rose,” he murmurs against my neck before nipping it. “You are mine, Petal, and I’m yours, always. You can’t forget our kind of connection, our love, and I’m not losing you again.”
He left after giving me a hard, long kiss, and that was that.
Barnett has come to my apartment five times this week to pick up Diego, apparently taking him to his father.
Noah says I’m his, yet he hasn’t contacted me, and I hate it—I really do—and I’m disappointed and hurt over it.
“You’re in your head again,” Natalie says from behind the counter as Peter looks at me with longing from beside her, but I ignore him and give her a slight smile.
Peter made a pass at me yesterday, and tried kissing me in the stock room. I pushed him away and told him I was taken, and I don’t know who was more shocked, him or me, at my declaration.
I didn’t mean to say the words; I didn’t even think about them. They just popped out, like my mouth knew something I didn’t. Noah left two years ago, and yet I still see myself as taken by him.
Pathetic, right? However, it does explain why I haven’t had the desire to date despite buying those condoms last year.
Maybe, subconsciously, I bought them, hoping he’d come find me….
I sigh and lean on my elbows on the counter as Peter goes to the other end to serve a customer, and I whisper, “I slept with him.”
Natalie’s eyes widen in shock as her head whips my way, and she stutters, “W-what? I mean, huh, I mean…was it good?”
I snort and admit, “It was fantastic, all four rounds of it, especially the two in the shower.” Her mouth drops open, and I wince. “I ran after his concert. A girl kissed him. I knew he didn’t kiss her back, but it just reminded me that I had more trust in us than he did two years ago, you know. All I wanted to do was throw hands on his behalf.” I shake my head. “I ran when I realized my trust in him was higher than his in me, and of course Noah, being Noah, followed me.” Natalie leans forward, intently listening. “I didn’t look in the peephole, again, and opened the door wearing nothing but his shirt from prom, again , and we argued. He then decided to goad me by bringing up how I’d feel seeing him do everything he did with me with another woman, and next thing I know, his lips were on mine, my back was against the wall, and he was inside me.
I blink, looking at her, trying to ignore the tingling sensation running through my body at the memory of that night. Her grin is so wide that she looks like a Cheshire cat.
I smile a little and continue, “The next morning, he woke me up kissing all over my face before telling me that we weren’t done, and that I’m the only one he wanted. Then, he left. I haven’t heard from him since. Barnett has been the go-to between us with Diego, so now….” My words trail off, not wanting to finish my thoughts, but Natalie does it for me.
"Now you think it was all a lie because your trust for him, where your heart is concerned, isn’t as strong as it used to be, isn’t as strong as it is where fidelity is concerned.”
I nod and wipe the tear that’s fallen, and she sighs, gripping my hands.
“How would you feel to watch him with someone else, doing all the things with her that he did with you?” she asks quietly.
I bite my bottom lip, and admit, “I would want to die, because he’s the only person I have ever and know I will ever love.”
She nods and whispers, “Then maybe you need to start there, by trying to learn to forgive him. You haven’t let another guy touch you, Rose. Peter tried, and subconsciously, you shoved him away because Noah is the only guy ever to kiss you.” She wipes away another tear from my cheek. “You need to call him and talk everything out, Rose, because, honestly, I don’t see you ever giving another man a chance. Noah owns you just like you own him. He’s clearly giving you space, and now you know it hurts that he’s not been around after you spent the night together; it's the proof you needed to realize you need him, sweetheart.”
I sniffle but nod, knowing she’s right.
I lean forward and kiss her cheek before leaning over the counter and grabbing my bag. Without a backward glance at where I know Peter is, his eyes glaring behind my back, even though he knew there was no chance with us, I walk out of the diner to my bike, the dark blue paint shining.
With my heart in my throat, I place my bag in the saddle, and climb on, turning the ignition and driving away from the diner.
Thankfully, it was the end of my shift because I would have walked out, even if it wasn’t….
It doesn’t take me long to get home, and I sigh; I need to collect Diego from Mrs. Cannon. Barnett messaged and said they had recordings to do for their new music today, and Noah couldn’t have Diego, though they didn’t mind taking him to the studio with them. I just sighed, then sent him a picture of Diego and Mrs. Cannon, and he sent back a sad face emoji.
The idiot.
Who knew rockstars could be so good with babies?
Shaking my head, I grab my bag from my saddle and walk toward the building, promising to call Noah when I get Diego in bed.
Five minutes later, I’m huffing and puffing a little from the stair climb. I take a deep breath before heading to Mrs. Cannon's door, but as I lift my fist to knock, I halt at the sound of singing behind me.
I turn toward my door.
“You never questioned my love,
You stood by me and held my hand.
Baby, you’re like a melody stuck in my head,
And I know I’d follow you wherever you go….”
Tears sting my eyes, and I walk over to my door before gently putting my key in the lock. Slowly I turn the key and open the door, the sight before me taking my breath away.
Noah sits on my second-hand couch, Diego lying on his bare chest, his head on his dad’s shoulder, asleep.
“Come on now, baby, try to understand,
I’m here by your side, refusing to let go.
Come on now, baby, try to understand,
That we’ll get through this because you're mine….”
Tears fall as Noah looks up, locking eyes with me, and he smiles slightly.
“Did you really think I’d walk away from you again, Petal?” I look down, not wanting to admit it's where my thoughts went, but he speaks up again, and I look at him, “I gave you a week's space to get your mind ready because this is it now. We’re going to get all the shit out on the table, and I’m going to fight like fucking mad to ensure I don’t lose you again.”
My breath stutters, his words sounding perfect but scaring the crap out of me all the same, and all I can think of saying is, “Peter made a move on me.” I wince, hating that I just said that, but I take pleasure in the pure anger that takes over his features.
Diego stirs, most likely picking up on the tension, and Noah stands, patting Diego’s bottom as he walks past me and down the hallway into Diego’s room.
I don’t move from my spot in the doorway, and when he returns, he storms over to me and pulls me inside, gently shutting the front door and pressing me against it, making me gasp.
His hand lightly comes up to my jaw, and I can’t help it as my eyes look over his body because, God, what a view….
He forces me to look into his eyes, and the urge to look away from the intensity hits me hard, but I don’t, I keep eye contact even as he growls, “Rose!” in warning, the vibrations through his chest going into mine.
I swallow hard and whisper, “I pushed him away before he could kiss me.”
Noah physically relaxes as he places his forehead against mine.
My tears fall as I whisper, “You left me, Noah. I had to give birth on my own, how can we get past that? How can I possibly trust you again?”
His eyes pin mine as he whispers back, “By giving me a chance to not only prove myself, Rose, but also to give you the answers you need.” He leans forward and kisses the corner of my mouth, and rasps, “Piper is out of the band; Joel got her transferred, and filed harassment charges against her, and we have a case because of the cameras in the rooms where we stayed. The label had no choice but to agree when all of us threatened to walk away. I never signed the rights to my music over to them, baby.” I sniffle. He squeezes my hip, and his thumb gently tracing over my jaw. “Gina is banned from any tours and concerts, and Mom has ensured she’ll never be able to contact you again. I’ve told Gina the same thing.” He grips my jaw. “Our next tour is postponed for six months, Petal, so we can sort this out. I won’t go unless you and our son are with me. I rented a condo in Fremont. The boys and I will stay here until we’ve sorted this out, until I can convince you to come home with me.”
My tears fall faster, and he groans. “Fuck, I hate your tears, Petal.”
Gently, he kisses my lips, then utters, “We’re going to make it through this, because I love you, Rose, and you love me, and our love is worth fighting for.” He kissed me again, harder this time, and like the hussy I am, I open for him as he licks my lips.
I hope he’s right.
I want us to be okay, but more importantly, I hope that I can learn to trust him, because he’s right, I do love him, and being without him and seeing all those photos of him online is killing me.