Chapter 3 - Kyle

It’s good to be home.

Sitting out the back of Shelley’s with a tall jug of beer and a thick steak sandwich, I’m more relaxed than I have been for twelve months. I did my duty to the pack. Infiltrated Sawpit, got my intel, then got out clean.

I had to fake my death to get out of there. Once you join Sawpit Pack, you can’t ever leave. It’s a brotherhood type of deal, but it’s also because they are into a lot of illegal stuff and can’t have any loose ends.

Bailey sits at the head of the table with Jack to his right. Sasha, Dane, Seth, and Carson are here as well, and Kelta from the mountain pack.

“Thanks, everyone, for getting in here relatively early. As you all know, Kyle got in last night and we wanted to meet as soon as possible to hear what he has to say. Are you well-rested enough to give us a report?” Bae asks.

I nod, chewing down my sandwich so I can talk. “Sorry, guys. You can’t get a decent meal up past Sawpit to save your life. It’s wonderful beyond words to get a piece of steak and a decent beer.”

“We have tracked the Sawpit Pack towards Mount Wilson,” Kelta says. “This is of particular concern because it borders Silverton, and they are our allies.”

I nod in agreement. “Yes, they have moved that way with their new alpha, just like they did a few years ago. They are also heading north, towards Montrose.”

“That’s pretty much out of our territory, but it will border us for sure. We have pack all the way to Lake City.” Bae looks concerned, but only mildly.

“Why are they doing all this?” Dane asks. “For years, they’ve stayed behind the lines. Why move on other packs now?”

I let out a deep sigh. “There is nothing up there, and I mean nothing. Traveling in the opposite direction to Silver Meadows, there is Norwood, which is the closest anything to Sawpit, but it’s still pretty empty. They wanted to move on Silverton, but Montrose and Orchard City have greater resources. Basically, they need supply routes.”

“For drugs, guns, and tobacco?” Sasha snaps.

“Yes,” I agree, nodding. “But also, for staple foods, soap, clothing… they have nothing up there.”

“It sounds like you feel for them,” Bae says in a hard tone.

“I do. It’s hard to live in a place for so long and not develop some connection to it. They became savage from the scarcity of the region. And the fact is, the pack is getting bigger.”

“Will they settle, if they gain access to a trade route?” Bae asks.

I shake my head slowly. “No. They are vengeful. They want to hurt others just for the sake of it. There is no helping them.”

Bae sighs, nodding. “Understood. What intel do you have?”

“I have all of their den locations. I can mark them on a map for you, as well as their patrol routes. The new alpha’s name is Jethro Martin, and he’s a savage son of a bitch. I’ll give you full intel on him, as well as all their supply routes.”

“Good,” Bae answers. “That’s more than enough intel to fuck them right over if we have to. I don’t think we can let them take any territory to the north. It will be too tempting for them to hit us.”

“I agree,” I mutter. “These are bad people, violent and completely disconnected from modern society. They don’t live by civilized rules.”

“We are extremely proud of you, Kyle,” Bae says, smiling. “You’ve done a fantastic job. Thank you for your service to the pack.”

A warm wave of pleasure tingles through me. Approval, acceptance, this is all I’ve ever wanted. Finally, I’ve earned my place in the pack.

The meeting begins to break up, but Jack gestures for me to stay. I finish my sandwich and beer while the others leave until only Bae and Jack remain.

“I’ve got some news for you,” Bae says. “Another job, really. Your duty to the pack.”

“Okay,” I agree, nodding. “I was looking forward to a breather, but I can head straight out again if you like. What do you need?”

“Oh, it’s nothing like that,” Jack says, waving a hand. “You’ll be close to home. Well, you’ll kind of have a new home, actually.”

“What?” I have no idea what he’s talking about.

Bae laughs softly. “We’ve had so much luck and goodwill from the arranged marriages, we are going to continue with it. You’re the next male to fulfill this duty to the pack.”

The room seems to diminish around me, leaving me sitting on a tiny island where I’m isolated from my own senses.

I don’t know how to take this.

“There are a few candidates,” Jack says. “But it looks like Leslie Shaye is the most definite. Gladys and Decker are pushing pretty hard for this one. Do you know her?”

The sense of vertigo increases, and my skin feels hot and prickly. I try and sit completely still, hoping my discomfort doesn’t show.

My wolf is shrieking inside me, all claws and teeth and primal urges. While I was undercover, I went through some tough times. Only a few things enabled me to stay on track with the mission.

My duty to the pack, to please Bailey and Jack. And Leslie.

Knowing that she was safe, and that my work would keep her that way, saved my sanity. I thought about her every day, a deep, aching sadness that permeated my entire being. I counted every second until I could get out of there and see her again. I was going straight to Silverton after this meeting,

I always intended to win her back. I know that breaking up with her was the biggest mistake of my life. All I have wanted to do every day since is fix it.

“Are you alright, man?” Jack asks. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Ah… yeah. Still a bit tired from the mission, and this is a bit of a shock. When do I find out who I’m spending the rest of my life with?”

It better be Leslie. I couldn’t stand for it to be anyone else.

“If you’re happy to go ahead, then I’ll give Decker a call and see if we can have this sorted by this afternoon. Do you have any objections to Leslie? Have you met her before?”

I shake my head slowly, not committing an answer to either question. “If she is recommended by Gladys and Decker, I am more than happy to go ahead,” I say quietly.

“Excellent!” Bae announces, getting up. “I’ll make some arrangements. You are a vital member of the pack now, Kyle. You could be on the council in a few years if this keeps up. We were worried about you, you know.”

I nod, keeping my eyes on Bailey’s. “I know, my alpha. And I can’t thank you enough for giving me so many chances, and supporting me so I can serve the pack well.”

Bae nods and gives me a clap on the shoulder. “No problem. It’s what I’m here for. How about you take a rest for a bit? I’ll go and call Decker.”

While Jack and Bailey head off, I go upstairs to my little room. Shelley has a few rooms for rent above the bar, but she’s not a huge tourist trap like most of the places in town. These are usually just for wolves who are passing through. I got in so late last night, I opted to stay here instead of go home.

Home.

As I lie down on the bed, I wonder where I’ll be living with my new bride. I might have a house—well, more like a crappy shack—but it’s never really been a home.

I’m Jack and Gina’s cousin, and if I had been raised by Carla, maybe I’d have done better for myself just like they did. I shake my head, trying to clear it of these thoughts.

It’s useless to go down that track. Stop it now.

I shy away from the dark, shadowed corners of my mind that hold all my memories of the past. I don’t want to remember. I try to think peaceful thoughts, but my dreams quickly become dark.

When my phone rings and wakes me, I’m grateful for the distraction.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Kyle. It’s Bae. You ready to head over to Silverton?”

“Sure thing.”

“I’ll pick you up in ten.”

I wait downstairs, pacing back and forth so badly, Shelley demands I wait outside. By the time Bae arrives, I’ve managed to pull a fa?ade over myself, even though I haven’t really calmed down.

We talk a little on the way to Silverton, mostly about pack business and the connections with Sawpit. Bae also tells me that a few townhouses and public buildings have been built for pack use, thanks to Jack’s construction company.

As we pull up at Gladys’s diner, I try to play it cool, but my palms are getting sweaty. Bae gives me a wry look.

“I know, it’s daunting,” he says. “Everything will be okay, though. Both Carson and Gladys have made matches within their packs for years, and their matches always work out.”

I nod in agreement, trying to smile. I’m just so excited to see Leslie, I can’t contain myself.

This isn’t how I wanted us to meet, though.

I wanted to apologize, sweep her off her feet, and shout our love from the rooftops. I don’t know how to talk to her in front of all these people, or how to explain that we already know each other… intimately.

We head inside, and Gladys directs me to a booth. The elders have a chat over at the counter while I watch the door and have a very quiet freakout.

When the door jingles, I jump like someone fired a gun. My head swivels towards the door, and my eyes lock onto the vision of beauty that just walked in.

Leslie!

She’s even more beautiful than I remember. I can’t stop staring at her. I also seem to have lost complete control of myself. It feels like my jaw has dropped to the floor. I could be drooling, I’m not even sure.

Leslie walks over to the counter and greets the gathered elders. I watch in silence, desperately trying to get my shit together. I feel like I’ve been hit by a train, and now I’m flat out on the tracks, not knowing if I’m alive or dead. My body feels numb and tingly, but at the same time, my senses are heightened and overloaded.

The others stay at the counter as Leslie walks over to me. Gladys gives me a little wave, indicating they want to give us some privacy to talk before the pack listens in on everything.

Nice of them. Of course, no one knows we were actually together.

As Leslie gets closer, my ability to think decreases. Her pale brown hair flows around her shoulders in loose curls, catching the light from the setting sun that angles through the big glass windows. Her lips are deep red and beautifully curved. Her icy eyes appraise me critically as she sits down.

I’m so excited, I can’t even form words. I want to tell her I love her. I want to tell her I can’t wait to marry her.

This is going to be awesome! It’s so fantastic, we’re going to be together!

“So, it’s you,” Leslie says dully. Suddenly, I notice how her mouth is turned down at the edges, and her beautiful eyes aren’t sparkling with fun and mischief as they normally are. Doubt hits me, ringing through my bones.

Doesn’t she want to marry me?

“Leslie, I’m so glad to see you—”

“Well, I’m not happy to see you,” she says firmly. “I don’t think there’s anything to talk about, after last time.”

“What?” I whisper.

“I realize that I have to do this. I’ve been given very little choice. I will do my duty to the pack, whether I like it or not.”

She keeps glaring at me with that still, hard look. I’m so shocked, I can’t even speak.

I should have seen this coming… it should have been obvious to me. She will never forgive me for what I’ve done, and I don’t blame her.

I don’t deserve to be forgiven.