Chapter 21

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

S weat dripped down my forehead, and I wiped it away. The sun was beating down on me, but I wasn't going to give up. Jackson and I had been practicing my self-defense maneuvers every day since the morning after we'd arrived in Turks and Caicos. It had been three days now, and every day showed me just how out of practice I was.

And just how horny I was. The past three nights, Jackson and I had slept in the same bed, but our clothes had remained on. He'd been opposed to sharing a bed at first, but I'd promised to follow the rules, frustrating as they might be.

The no-sex rule was both great and terrible. Great because it had given us time to reconnect as Jackson had suggested. To deepen our emotional bond. But also terrible for obvious reasons.

For instance, how was I supposed to resist this man when he was shirtless and his skin glistened from the sun and exertion?

Though he wasn't exerting himself nearly as much as I was. Jackson looked hot, while I was a sweating, panting mess. My face was probably red, my hair sticking to my skin. And he still looked amazing.

So unfair.

"Sloan," he chided. "Stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?"

He narrowed his eyes at me. "You know what?"

"I'm sorry. I was just…admiring the view."

"Admiring the view is what landed you on your back last time."

"I didn't hear you complaining," I said.

His eyes darkened, likely replaying the moment when he'd pinned me to the mat, straddling me. I'd stared up at him, panting, his crotch only inches from my face. At that point, I hadn't even cared that he'd beaten me—again.

"Come on." He turned for the patio. "Let's take a water break and cool off."

"Fine," I huffed, shoulders slumped as I shuffled over. I gulped down some water. "I thought I was doing well until I started training with you again."

"You are doing well." He placed a hand on my shoulder. "I know you're frustrated, but I want you to be challenged. I want you to grow. I want you to be able to protect yourself no matter what size or how skilled your opponent is."

"I know." I grabbed a towel and dried my forehead. "I do. And I want that too, but…I feel like I'm never going to be able to beat you."

"You defended yourself on the boat the night you thought I was an intruder."

"True," I said. "But it was dark, and you weren't expecting it."

"No, but it goes to show that you have good instincts. And the more we train, the more it becomes muscle memory. I trained for years in the Navy and then at Hudson. It shouldn't be easy for you—or anyone—to take me down. Otherwise, I wouldn't be very good at my job."

"I thought you never wanted it to get to that point," I said, thinking of a conversation we'd had the other day while walking on the beach.

I'd learned a lot about the strategy that went into Jackson's job. The goal was always to prevent any issues before someone could even get remotely close to the client—or, rather, principal. To minimize potential problems through planning. To de-escalate situations if they arose.

He'd asked about my job and my role in the family business. He'd made me think—asking me questions like, what I would've done if I hadn't become the SVP for Huxley Hotels. Or what I was passionate about. It had been so long since anyone had been interested to hear my answer without expecting me to say the right thing.

The truth was, I loved my family and my job. Maybe it wasn't what I would've chosen if given the chance, but I didn't regret it. I knew how privileged I was. And I loved making an impact on employees' lives. I loved getting to travel the world and see amazing places. I loved creating an experience for our guests, giving them the luxury service they could depend on no matter what Huxley Grand location they visited.

Besides, even if I'd wanted to step down—which I didn't—I couldn't. I took my responsibility seriously. My role was about more than just me; it was about carrying on my family's legacy.

My grandparents had built something incredible. I knew how important the brand had been to them. How important it was to Graham and even Jasper. Sure, they could hire someone to replace me if I stepped down, but this was a family business. And we were a team.

Since our parents' deaths, it had always felt like us against the world. That was a big reason why Jackson and I had always understood each other so well. Loss, grief, responsibility brought on by death shaped people. And Jackson understood and respected the sense of duty I felt toward my family and the Huxley brand.

Part of me wondered if I'd told him about it when we were younger—told him who my family was and what would be expected of me one day—how he would've reacted. But I'd never given him the chance. So, while there were times in the past when I'd wanted to blame him for the breakdown of our relationship, I could acknowledge that my decisions had played a role as well.

But this was a fresh start. A chance to get to know each other. We'd had so many conversations lately. It had been nice. Our exchanges were deep and meaningful, genuine. It was so…refreshing.

We'd discussed a wide range of topics, from music to the big questions of life, and I'd enjoyed getting to know Jackson again—as the man he was now. He wasn't all that different from before, just more…confident. More secure in himself in a way he hadn't been when we were younger.

I loved that we could talk about anything and everything. I loved that he made me smile, made me laugh. I loved that he encouraged me, empowered me. I loved him.

I stilled. I love him?

A sense of peace settled over me at the acknowledgment. I love him. I smiled, realizing it was true. It was just as true now as it had been fourteen years ago.

"Sloan?"

I turned to him, wondering if my thoughts were written across my face. "What was that?"

He wore a bemused smile. "I asked if you were done for the day."

I smoothed back my hair. "Let's practice a little more before we shower and go into town and check on the boat."

"Sure." He gulped down some water. His Adam's apple bobbed with every swallow, and I'd never been more entranced by someone's throat.

I turned and headed for the area where we'd been practicing. I took a deep breath and tried to center myself. Tried to ignore how unbelievably attractive Jackson was and the fact that I was falling for him. Had already fallen for him, if I was being completely honest with myself.

I sighed. This was… This wasn't supposed to happen. But there'd never been any other choice. Not when it came to him.

I'd never been able to resist Jackson. And he'd been showing me that I could trust him in so many ways. The man had gotten a tattoo for me. I was literally inked on his skin.

"Ready?" Jackson asked.

"Yes," I said. And even though I knew he was referring to our sparring, it felt like I was agreeing to so much more.

"Tomorrow's the eclipse," Jackson said over dinner a few nights later. We were sitting on the covered patio enjoying the sunset and a meal prepared by one of the resort's private chefs.

I took a sip of my wine. "Hopefully the weather will hold out."

There was a thirty percent chance of rain, and visibility was on everyone's mind. Everywhere we went on the island, it was all anyone talked about. The eclipse. The best place to view it. The concern for visibility during the totality.

I hoped it would all work out, but if not, I was still enjoying myself. Part of me couldn't believe we were over halfway through our trip. I wondered what would happen when it ended and we went home. What would that even look like?

The board was still deliberating about the proposed chief of security position. I was hopeful, but I wasn't going to tell Jackson until they'd agreed. If they didn't, well, I was going to have to think of another plan to make sure Jackson and I would have job options in the same city. But with Graham and Jasper on my side, I felt confident we could push it through.

Graham had done some more digging, even though I'd told him not to. It was too risky while Hudson was sniffing around, but he'd assured me no one would ever know. I hoped his confidence wouldn't bite him in the butt someday.

And for the first time since I'd been gone, another threatening note had appeared—this time at my office. I was glad I wasn't in London, though Jackson assured me that Hudson was close to wrapping up their investigation. We were scheduled to have a debrief with their team and the Huxley board soon.

"You're awfully serious." Jackson placed his hand over mine. "You okay?"

I shrugged off my thoughts and forced myself to focus on the present. I didn't want to ruin the rest of this trip—and my time with Jackson—by worrying about the future.

I'd loved our time on Turks and Caicos. We spent our days exploring the island, swimming in the pool, and practicing self-defense. Life here, with Jackson, was romantic and easy and fun. We still hadn't discussed the future, but I tried to be content with what we were and the promise of what might be. Because any time I let myself imagine the future, this was what I wanted.

I took a sip of wine. "What do you think will happen at the debrief?"

The flavors of tangerine, mango, and honeysuckle exploded on my tongue. The wine was both flavorful and refreshing.

Jackson set down his silverware and scanned the horizon. "Hudson has narrowed down their list to a few suspects. We're close."

"Can I see it?"

"Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"What if I know something that could help solve it? What if I could clear someone who was innocent?"

"At this point," he said, "you have to assume that any one of the suspects is guilty."

"What happened to innocent until proven guilty?" I joked.

"While we're investigating, it's best to remain suspicious of everyone until the culprit is found."

I stared off at the horizon, startling when Jackson placed his hand on mine. "Hey. We will find whoever is responsible."

"I…" I swallowed hard. "You're right. I'm not sure I want to see who's on the list. And I don't want to talk about this anymore. I think I'm going to go for a swim. Want to join me?"

"Sure," he said. "I need to make a call, and then I'll meet you out here in a little bit."

"Okay." I headed inside, thanking the chef for the meal and refilling my glass of wine.

Jackson was in the spare room, so I chatted with the chef before heading back to our room to change. I combed through my suitcase before settling on my most daring swimsuit, one I hadn't worn yet. Had never worn since it was on the more risqué side.

At first glance, it looked like a classy one-piece white swimsuit. It wasn't until after I'd received the suit that I'd realized it was a thong and there was no lining. It was quite sheer, and it would be even more so when wet.

It wasn't particularly practical, especially for sailing or snorkeling. Or anything except perhaps seduction. But it would definitely torture Jackson, and that was the point.

It must have been on the bed when I'd been packing, and maybe my housekeeper had thrown it in the suitcase. Who knew. I hadn't intended to wear it, but this seemed like the perfect occasion.

I threw on a cover-up just in case the chef was still cleaning up, but I was fairly sure he'd already left. Fortunately, my suspicions were confirmed when I went to refill my wineglass. I grabbed the bottle and Jackson's glass and carried them out to the pool.

I turned on the jets for the hot tub and climbed in. The house was mostly dark apart from a light in the kitchen, and the patio glowed softly from the lights that lined the walkway and edges.

It wasn't long before Jackson joined me, stripping out of his shirt before slipping beneath the water. It was warmer than I'd realized, and the sight of a shirtless Jackson made me even hotter. I took a sip of my wine, hoping it would cool me down, but I was beginning to perspire. My sexy seduction was turning into a sweaty one.

Jackson rested his arms on the back of the tub, his eyes gleaming with amusement. "Hot?" I nodded. "I was surprised you chose the hot tub."

"It sounded nice for my sore muscles."

He regarded me with a bemused smile over the top of his wineglass. The waves crashed in the distance, and I pushed my hair away from my face, clipping it up.

I stood and sat on the edge of the hot tub, my legs still dangling in the water. Jackson made a choked sound, and when I glanced up, he looked like a cartoon character whose eyes were bulging out of their head—comically so.

"You okay?" I asked in a sweet tone.

"What—" He wheezed. Coughed. "What the fuck are you wearing?"

I glanced down at my suit, and yep, it was completely sheer. The material clung to my nipples like I was in a wet-T-shirt contest. "A swimsuit," I said, being deliberately obtuse.

"It's—" He started to say, and I stood and turned to grab a towel to dab at my face. "Oh, holy fuck. You're trying to kill me."

I smiled to myself, pleased that my plan was working.

"Damn, hayati . Your ass looks fine as fuck."

With my back still to Jackson, I smiled and took my sweet-ass time bending forward to get the towel. When I turned to face Jackson, he was gripping the edge of the hot tub so hard I thought he might crack the tile.

I was desperate for him to touch me. My nipples were hard points against the material, and I knew he could see them. He swallowed hard, his breath quickening.

He smoothed his hand up his chest and over his throat. "Spread your legs," he commanded. "I want to see you."

I bit my lip, considering. "Not unless you show me something."

He stood, his cock bulging against his swimsuit. He pushed his suit over his hips and sat on the edge of the hot tub. "Does that work?"

"Definitely," I said as he took his cock in hand, reminded of that night on the boat not so long ago. His muscles flexed with the movement, the entire thing so freaking sexy.

If I'd thought I was hot before, I was molten lava now. I knew we were skirting the rules, but I didn't care. I needed him more than I needed my next breath. And if this was the only way I could have Jackson right now, then I'd take whatever I could get.

I took my time, spreading my legs, the water sliding down my skin. His jaw dropped even lower. "Touch yourself," he rasped. "Slowly."

I did as he'd asked, circling my clit in lazy movements. I could feel his eyes on me the entire time, his blue irises dark with desire. He started pumping his cock, and I wasn't even sure if he realized he was doing it.

He stood and inched closer to me, splashing water as he did so. "I really—" he took few more tentative steps "— really want to kiss you."

"I really want you to kiss me." But I waited on my perch, letting him look his fill. Basking in his attention.

"I…" He swallowed, his eyes scanning me. "You…" He inhaled a shaky breath and let it out slowly.

"It's okay. You can touch me," I panted, silently begging him to do just that.

"If I do, I won't be able to stop."

"Would that be so terrible?" I wasn't above begging. I needed this man.

And at this point, I wasn't sure what difference it would make. Yes, he was technically still my bodyguard, but there was little reason to be concerned for my safety in a gated resort. And I knew Jackson would never willingly put me in danger.

"No. And yes."

I stood, and he placed his hands on my hips, smoothing them over my ass. He groaned. "I love this swimsuit."

"And I—" I gave him a quick peck "—love—" another kiss, slower this time "—you." The words came out unbidden, but they were true. It was so easy. So simple. So…right.

I didn't know what the future held, but I wanted Jackson to be a part of mine.

He blinked a few times, and I smiled back at him. He cupped my face, his eyes full of adoration. I leaned in to kiss him, and his lips curved against mine. This kiss was a homecoming and a revelation. A second chance and a new beginning.