2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

Marcel

It had been months since I held that sweet, scared boy in my arms as I soothed his fears and wiped away his tears at the Littles’ Valentine’s party. Yet he never left my mind.

Ralphie.

His name ghosted through my memory, his voice as he said his name when I asked forever embedded in my mind. Though I’d long since buried my beloved Elion, betrayal was all I felt at the thought of another. The Daddy I once was no longer existed.

Broken.

That was me and I’d never be worthy of a boy again.

Resigned to a life of loneliness, I promptly cancelled my membership to Avec Pleasure and slid back into a self-imposed reclusive life. Had Tess not asked for my help, I never would’ve been there in the first place. Never would’ve met the boy that stirred emotions deep inside me that need stay buried with my beloved Elion.

I glanced around the lavish house Elion and I had made into a home together. What good was all this money if it couldn’t save our loved ones? There was nothing medically that could be done for Elion. The brain tumors were inoperable and had woven themselves in such a way there was no way to safely remove them.

His playroom had sat untouched since his passing. The door was locked and no one, including myself, was allowed inside. Housekeepers hadn’t cleaned it at my request as I wished for everything inside it to be kept as Elion had left it.

Hell, even his clothes still hung in our closet.

My heart was buried with Elion, and I swore I’d never love again.

If that were true then how did another find its beat?

I heard Elion’s voice clear as day as I had many times over the years since he’d been gone. Often I wondered if I was losing it or if he was indeed really there and I just couldn’t see him. I’d never believed in ghosts, though perhaps I should have.

Daddy, you deserve to love again.

“I don’t know how to do that without you, my dear boy. You showed me what love was.”

Not true. You always had it in you and it’s time you show another boy what it means to be loved by you.

Manifesting.

That’s what this was. A lonely old man manifesting his dead boy’s voice, willing it to be there. Next thing you know I’d have six cats that I’d spend the long days singing show tunes to.

“Hello?” I answered the phone without checking the screen first, irritated the ring had pulled me from my dark memories.

“Marcel, it’s Alex and Richard. How are you?”

Did I answer truthfully? Hell no, they’d have me locked up. “I’m doing well. What can I do for you two?”

“We have a proposition for you. Are you available to join us for Thanksgiving dinner? We can go over it then,” Alex asked.

“A meeting over a holiday meal? Do you two ever stop working?” I was once a workaholic, too, until Elion came along. Now that I’d sold the business I spent my days doing anything but work.

“Yes, sorry. It’s of the utmost importance and I’m afraid our schedules are booked solid, and this is the only time we have available. We can promise you a warm meal with great friends if that helps aid in your decision?” Richard, always the mediator. No wonder he was so damn good at what he did.

Go, Daddy. Spend time with your friends , that sweet voice pleaded.

“Fine.” I meant to answer Elion but having forgot I was on the phone, Richard and Alex took it as their response.

“Excellent, we’ll text you the details and will see you then. Enjoy your night,” Richard said as he disconnected the call.

“Thank you for that,” I called out, carrying on a nonexistent conversation, though I heard my boy’s sweet giggles trail off.

I was well and truly losing it.

As promised, Richard texted the details and when I asked if I could bring anything they promptly declined my offer. I’d still grab a couple bottles of wine to share. I was never one to show up empty-handed.

Maybe being around their boys would assuage the Daddy inside enough that I’d no longer yearn for a boy of my own. The desire was faint, actually it had been dormant until this past Valentine’s Day.

Ralphie.

Since I’d retired, gods, it felt unreal to say that given I was only forty-seven. But since then, I’d only invested in philanthropic endeavors. Mostly medical as a way to pay respect to Elion’s memory. I’d funded a new children’s wing at the hospital that was dedicated to him and though he wasn’t a child he’d longed for us to have children of our own.

Thinking back, we’d never finalized taking the next steps to adopt or even use a surrogate and I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why we put it off.

Well, I’d listen to what Richard and Alex had to say. Their reputation preceded them, and I had no doubt if they were involved it would be a prosperous business venture.

Not that money really mattered anymore.

I really should consider selling the house. It was far too much space for one person and it held too many memories for me.

“Welcome, Marcel. We’re delighted you could join us.” Alex greeted me as I arrived at his and Orion’s home.

“Thank you for the invite. Your home is gorgeous.” I handed him the wine bag as I glanced around. It was a lavish mansion with insane views. From the front foyer I could see straight out into their back yard and beyond. “Something red to go with dinner. I hope it’s to your liking.”

“I’m sure it is. Come in, Richard is around here somewhere.”

The man in question came around the corner just then.

“Marcel, it’s wonderful to see you.”

“And you as well.”

We embraced then I followed them over to a bar area where Alex proceeded to pour us each a glass of the wine I’d brought.

“To good friends and happy holidays,” Richard offered, and we gently tapped our glasses to his.

“Where are your boys?”

“They’re in the playroom, not so patiently waiting for Ralphie to arrive.” Richard said that so casually he was clearly unaware of the internal turmoil boiling over that very name brought me.

“Ralphie is coming? Here?”

My heartrate sped up and my mouth went dry.

“Yes, is that a problem? He and his sister are alone for the holidays and the boys asked if they could join us. I thought it was a wonderful gesture,” Richard replied.

“Yes, yes it is indeed. Please, excuse me. I didn’t mean to give the wrong impression. It’s not a problem for me, just a surprise.”

Don’t screw this up, Daddy.

It would appear Elion’s voice wasn’t relegated to only our home.

The doorbell rang and Jacob and Orion came barreling down the stairs.

“They’re here, Daddy!” Orion shouted.

At the same time Alex and Richard both bellowed, “No running in the house!”

Jacob promptly slowed, he wasn’t the circus leader and was in fact a very good boy, whereas Orion enjoyed riling his Daddy up and was doing a good job of it now. The marble floors alone would make me a nervous Daddy.

As you once were in our very home.

Jacob and Orion greeted Ralphie and Tess, their giddiness and excitement filled me with a warmth I’d long since missed. The early days with my dear Elion, his laughter and giggles echoed through our home. He was such a happy boy, so full of life. Until he wasn’t.

That was a time long ago when I had far more energy than I possessed now. I’d chase and catch him and swing him through the air. We’d play for hours, everything from dolls, he had a massive collection I donated to the children’s hospital, to building blocks and arts and crafts.

Scenes until this very moment I hadn’t realized how much I missed.

“Marcel, it’s wonderful to see you again,” Tess said as we hugged.

“Yes, and you, too. Today is full of wonderful surprises.”

“Hi, Daddy Marcel,” Ralphie shyly waved.

“Hello, sweet boy, how are you?”

“I am well, thanks for asking.”

Such a polite boy, clearly cut of a similar cloth as Jacob.

“Daddy, can we go upstairs and play?” Orion asked Alex.

“Yes, until dinner is ready. I’ll come and get you boys then.”

Ralphie was slow to go, sneaking glances back at me before he followed them upstairs. My eyes stayed on him until he disappeared from sight.

“Marcel, are you all right?”

I turned to find the three of them curiously watching me. “Yes, sorry. Lost in thought.”

“Would those thoughts have anything to do with an adorable blond boy?” Richard teased. Tess’s face was devoid of anything I could decipher. Was she angered by my interest in her brother? Could I even call it interest when all I’ve done since the day we met was condemn myself for thinking of someone who wasn’t my Elion?

“Where did I put my drink?” A change in conversation was more than warranted.

“It’s in your hand,” Alex winked, and my face flushed.

“Yes, yes, of course it is. How about a tour of your lovely grounds?” Anything to get out into the cool air. Was it stuffy in here or was it just me?

It’s just you, silly Daddy.

The four of us stepped out onto a large porch that led into a lush grassy lawn. Off to the side there was a large greenhouse and a play area for Orion complete with a swing set, oversized sandbox, and a jungle gym. Every littles’ dream outside play area.

“Do you garden, Alex?” I asked, quite impressed with they’d done.

“No actually, Orion does. Most of the vegetables and some of the fruit we eat he grows organically.” The pride Alex held for his boy’s gift shone brightly upon his face. “He’s a handful but he’s got a heart of gold.”

“Amazing.”

“The rest of the grounds are tended to by David, our gardener and Lisette’s fiancé. They’re family to us, Lisette basically raised Orion. I owe that woman a lifetime of thanks.” The love Alex had for Orion was familiar and I understood how it carried a Daddy and led him to do his best for his boy, no matter the cost.

I was once that Daddy myself.

And you can be again if you’d only allow yourself to feel.

Cheeky boy, even from the grave.

By the time we wandered back inside, Lisette was calling up to the boys that it was dinner time. They came bounding down the stairs and to an abrupt halt at the landing when they glimpsed their Daddies’ firm glares.

“Orion Michael.”

“Sorry, Daddy.” Though he was anything but. That boy’s face was always filled with mischief.

Jacob went to Richard’s side while Ralphie returned to Tess, though he’d returned to sneaking peeks at me. Did I make him nervous? I surely hoped that wasn’t the case. I supposed I owed him an apology of sorts after caring for him that night then never reaching out again.

Yes, you do.

As everyone chose their seats, Daddies with their boys by their sides, I ended up on one side of Ralphie while Tess was on the other. The presentation of the traditional thanksgiving meal was nothing short of magazine worthy. The huge turkey had been placed in front of Alex, I supposed for him to carve as it was his house, and was perfectly cooked to a rich golden brown. Stuffing, mashed potatoes, multiple gravy boats, cranberry sauce topped with fresh cranberries. Spiral ham, salad, rolls—my mouth salivated.

How long had it been since I’d partaken in such an elegant meal?

“If this tastes anywhere near as wonderful as it looks and smells, Lisette, we will be in heaven.” I couldn’t help but thank the chef even though I’d not had a single bite.

“She didn’t do it all alone,” a woman said as she took the empty seat beside me. “Hello, I’m Claudine. I belong to Jacob and take care of Richard.”

The table erupted into raucous laughter. “Marcel, this my very dear friend and caretaker, Claudine. AKA, Lisette’s bestie.”

“Wonderful to meet you, Claudine, and thank you for your contribution to this fantastic meal.”

“You’re welcome. Now if Alex will carve the bird, we can finally eat.”

“All right, woman, I’m doing it,” Alex teased her. The playful banter between everyone was refreshing and full of love and admiration for one another. What a wonderful family my friends had amassed. The fact they included me in their private meal was heartfelt. How idyllic their lives were, at least to those of us such as me who were outsiders looking in.

Collectively we watched as Alex carved the bird, first serving the fabulous cooks and then the others. Once all plates had slices of turkey on them, the side dishes were passed around. The Daddies served their boys and as much as I wished to do the same for Ralphie, I wouldn’t proceed without his permission.

“Ralphie, would you like for me to serve you, or would you like to select your own from the dishes as they’re come around?”

I swear, everyone chose that moment to freeze in place. No silverware scraped dishes and not a word was spoken. I didn’t dare glance their way, I knew their attention was on us.

“Um, would you, please?” His whispered reply filled me with joy.

“I’d be honored to.”

As the dishes came my way, I filled both our plates. It was heavenly and only increased the pleasure this meal and this evening held for me. When all was said and done and everyone dug in, Ralphie leaned toward me and whispered, “Thank you.”

“You are very welcome, dear boy.”

Ralphie’s cheeks pinkened then he began sampling his food selections. I was in awe, glimpsing his reaction to each delicacy. Was I trying to get a feel for foods he did or did not like? Quite possibly, but I was more drawn in, enamored really by this boy beside me and I wished to learn all I could about him.

Serendipitous.

That word hit me right in the chest. In the wake of my sorrow and self-reflection, this boy was dropped into my lap not once, but twice. How could I not help but feel it was with purpose? Though tonight he wasn’t in my lap, per se, as he was the first time we met.

Yet.

Good Daddy.

Throughout the meal our elbows touched, and we’d share flirty sidelong glances. Occasionally our knees brushed and the last time they did neither of us retracted them. Such sweet flirtations and so unlike me. I hardly recalled doing the same with Elion, though I likely had all those years ago.

“So, Marcel,” Richard’s voice drew me back. “Since you’ve sold your business, how do spend your time? Any new adventures?”

Sulking. Lonely. Depression.

I knew better than to share any of that. “No, no new adventures. Honestly, the last two years have been a blur.”

“I heard we have you to thank for the new addition at the children’s hospital?” Leave it to Alex to bring that up.

“Yes. I wanted to do something in Elion’s memory. It was dedicated to him. It’s a cancer center with state-of-the-art equipment for treatment and testing.”

“Absolutely fantastic. Hats off to you for doing that,” Richard said, though I knew both he and Alex made similar contributions in town spread out across various altruistic endeavors.

“It’s the least I could do.” In my peripheral vision I spied Ralphie hanging on our every word. I didn’t want him to think the worst. The least I could do was give a brief explanation. “Elion was my boy, my husband. He passed away two years ago.”

“Oh,” Ralphie gasped and covered his mouth. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

“Thank you. It’s been difficult but I’m on the mend.” At least it felt that way while in is presence. Was that wrong of me?

No, it’s not. It’s time to move on, Daddy.

Elion was always right, even when he wasn’t.

Cheeky Daddy.

Once the meal was over and our stomachs delightfully filled, we each did our part to help clean up.

“Lisette and Claudine, thank you for that wonderful meal.”

“You are very welcome, Marcel. Dessert is still to come after we sort the leftovers,” Claudine replied while she and Lisette got to work organizing the kitchen to their liking. Truly wonderful women. Alex and Richard were lucky to have them in their lives.

“Daddy, can we go play?” Orion asked Alex.

“Yes, my love. Go ahead. We’ll get you boys when it’s time for pie.”

The boys wandered back up the stairs and Tess followed behind them this time. I hoped I hadn’t made her uncomfortable.

“Marcel, join us for a drink?” Richard asked.

“Absolutely. Did you want to discuss the investment opportunity now?” I was curious as to what they had in mind.

“Um, about that,” Alex nervously rubbed the back of his neck. “There isn’t one.”

“What do you mean?”

“What my dear friend is having trouble explaining is we invited you here under false pretenses,” Richard chugged his drink. “When the boys asked to invite Ralphie it was a no brainer to invite you.”