32. Grace

THIRTY-TWO

GRACE

"What is the Rock of Gibraltar?" I yell at the TV. I've been watching old episodes of Jeopardy to keep myself from turning on the Blizzard game. I've been avoiding Tanner for days now, and I'm dying to see him, even if it's on a screen. But after the other night, and all the emotions battling each other in my head, I'm trying to get myself together.

I've spent three days in here, working on my phone and watching trash television. I even managed to read every single piece of email in my inbox, which should win me some kind of award because it took an entire day. The best one of them all was the result of my STI testing, which was negative across the board, so Cash's dick will remain intact.

Godspeed, Sophia.

"Who is Queen Victoria?" the contestant answers correctly.

"What the fuck?" I mumble to myself. I almost never get the questions right, but I was way off that time.

I set my pint of Ben & Jerry's aside, kicking my pink bunny slippers up onto the coffee table. Since I came here in only a t-shirt and panties, I wasn't surprised to see several bags full of comfy clothes and new undergarments sitting outside the guest suite door the following morning. I was, however, shocked to see a brand new sewing machine with an entire box full of threads and other supplies next to it. I'm ashamed to admit the amount of times I've re-read the note that was attached to the top. I pick it up from beside me, staring at the familiar handwriting and the words that I've all but memorized over the last few days.

Dear Grace,

I know this won't give back all the things I've taken from you, but you have a gift that the world deserves to see. I hope this strikes some of the inspiration that's been missing from your life. I believe in you, and I can't wait to see you shine.

Love always,

Tanner

The machine is still in the box, sitting just inside the door to the living area of the suite. It's certainly a step up from the old one I have at my house, which makes me a little excited to give it a try the next time I feel like I might be able to design a piece. I know eventually, I will. I just need the right motivation.

As muddied as my emotions are about where Tanner and I stand, I have to give him credit for everything he's done for me in the last few weeks. Not only has he offered me places to stay, but he's been taking care of me nonstop, making sure I have anything I could possibly want or need. He's been gone all day at Blizzard Stadium, so I snuck up to the kitchen to grab stuff to refill the refrigerator down here. He had all my favorites stocked and ready to go, including several pints of Cherry Garcia so I can wallow in self-pity properly.

He gets me. Goddamn his pretty ass for that.

I'm about to guess another wrong answer when there's a knock on the door. I freeze for a moment, but muster up the courage to face him.

I walk over, inching the door open and peeking at him. "Hi," I say quietly.

"Hey," he replies, awkwardly shoving his hands into the pockets of his grey sweatpants. He smells amazing, like he's fresh from the shower, his familiar cologne enveloping the space around us. I almost let my eyes roll back in my head when I inhale, but I fight the urge.

"I have someone upstairs who wants to meet you."

I scrunch my eyebrows, confused as to who could be here for me.

The corner of his lips tip up in a ghost of a smile as he looks down at my mismatched outfit and slippers. "I think you look adorable, but I'd be a terrible person if I didn't suggest changing before you come up."

I hesitate, because after the other night, I don't know how to act around him. When I took off from the sex room and came back to the guest suite, it was more of a defense mechanism than anything. I knew that if I had stayed, I might've done something stupid like kissed him or told him how much I've missed him over the last five years, and I'm still not sure if I think he deserves that right now.

"Okay," I finally say in agreement, turning toward the bedroom while he waits. I don't know what he meant out there, but I opt for black leggings and an off-the-shoulder sweater before checking the mirror to make sure the rest of me is okay. I'm only wearing mascara and lip balm, but it'll do. It's not like some A-list celebrity is up there waiting to meet me.

I return to the living room, grabbing my phone from the end table and walking out the door with Tanner following behind me. Before I even get to the top of the staircase, I hear the commotion.

Several loud voices laugh and talk as rap music plays quietly on the living room speakers. I slow down, wanting to be closer to him because even though I have no idea where we stand, his presence is comforting. He looks down at me with a soft smile, nodding his head at the doorway as if to say go on in . I do, and I have to do a triple take because I know I'm not seeing things right.

Sitting on one end of the couch is a tall man with deep dimples in his cheeks. A beautiful woman with black hair sits on his lap, laughing as he plants kisses all over her face.

On the other end of the couch is another man, with a brunette leaning into him. He says something in her ear, and she raises a brow before mouthing what looks to be ‘ Yes, Daddy.' But none of that is what has me frozen like a moron in the doorway. Because in the chair across the room is Bella fucking Simon.

"Tanner, what's happening?" I whisper. He just chuckles, putting a hand on my lower back to let me know he's still with me, as my idol stands and starts walking my way. A very large man with quads bigger than my whole body trails behind her, wrapping both arms around her as she stops in front of me.

"Oh my God! You must be Grace. It's so nice to meet you. I'm Bella," she says cheerfully, extending her hand.

My jaw drops, because she knows who I am, as I stick out my hand and place it in hers. "I'm—," I stutter, unable to think. It hasn't registered that she already said my name, but none of that matters because I don't remember it anyway.

"You're happy to meet her," Tanner whispers in my ear, his warm breath against my skin snapping me back to reality.

"Yes, that." I immediately cringe, because I'm fucking this up in the most ridiculous way right now. But Bella just smiles, moving our hands up and down in a shake. I can't believe she's actually standing in front of me. I knew that she was dating one of the Blizzard players, but I had no idea that he was in Tanner's little bro group, and I definitely didn't expect to see her lounging around in his living room.

I've been a huge fan of hers since I can remember. One of my core memories is sitting outside the stadium with my brother and Tanner, listening to her perform because we couldn't get tickets. They've gotten harder and harder to get over the years, so I still haven't been to one of her shows. Although, this is way better than seeing her on a stage with hundreds of thousands of other people in the room.

"Tanner told me about the jersey dress you made when he was in college," she says. The memory jolts me, because that was one of the last days we had together before he left me. It was also the last piece I ever made. Sadness tries to take over, reminding me that I never even got a chance to wear it, but Bella continues, and I quickly push my emotions down. "I'm looking for some cute game day outfits for this season. Would you be interested in making some for me? Everything I've found so far hasn't really been my style."

I shouldn't say yes. I haven't been able to make a single thing in so long, and I don't want to let her down. But the hopeful look in her eyes has me feeling all kinds of inspired. I want to help her. I want to make her such amazing outfits, that she's proud to walk into that stadium every Sunday wearing them.

"I'd love to," I say, exhaling in relief, because this might just be the thing I needed to get my groove back.

"I want cute stuff too," the girl with the black hair whines, her bottom lip pushing out in a pout.

"Grace, I'm going to level with you," the guy she is sitting with says. "I'm financially irresponsible. I have absolutely no budget when it comes to my wife's happiness. If you can make her whatever she wants, I'll pay for it. I don't care how much it costs. "

I laugh out loud, covering my mouth with my hand, because this is insane. Not only am I going to try making pieces again, but they're for women who are so high-profile in the area that there's no way they won't be seen all over the Internet.

"Me, too!" shouts the brunette. "I like to call my look Sideline Chic , but I'd love to incorporate some more Blizzard colors into the outfits I wear on game days."

I'm still in shock as Tanner goes around the room introducing me to everyone. We fall into easy conversations, and I notice how happy all of the couples look as they show affection to one another. It all seems so easy, and I wish I could have that.

I look across the room to where Tanner is sitting in a chair, our eyes meeting as he gives me a soft smile. I hate the way we left things between us the other night. I've given myself a little bit of time to sort it out, but I really need to decide what's next. Do I want to give him another chance? Can I trust him with my heart? Will I regret not walking away?

All of that remains to be seen, but I know it's getting harder and harder to fight the pull I have to him, whether I want to or not.