Chapter 34

CHAPTER 34

Clara

My tears flow freely as I drive away from Riggs. When I hit the main road, I pull over and let the sobs take over my body. I hate that he said anything. I wish he had just told Alex to fuck off like he usually would. Especially when I know his words aren't true. I know deep in my soul that he loves me, that I am everything to him. It's so frustrating because now I have cleanup to do. When all I want to do is go back home to my man and my dogs.

I wipe my face and pull out my phone. Before I can even check my sisters' locations, I find four texts from Riggs.

Riggs: I don't like this.

Riggs: Just come back.

Riggs. Let me go talk to everyone.

Riggs: Call me, Clara. I love you. So fucking much.

When Darcy licks my tears away, I cuddle into his muzzle. "And he calls you a fool."

Ignoring Riggs, I look at my sisters' locations to see they're all at Dirty Pages. Which means that Elliot has probably spilled the beans. Why can't life be easy? Rolling my eyes, I put the car back in drive and head toward town. My phone sounds with missed calls and messages from Riggs, but I can't talk to him right now. I'm so fucking annoyed, and I need him to know his words have consequences.

Even if he didn't mean what he said, I won't allow him to think it's okay. I'm worth more than that.

When I arrive at Dirty Pages, I wipe my face free of my tears. As much as I knew it was bound to happen, a fight between Riggs and me, I didn't realize that it would hurt like this. That I would feel so lost without him. That ignoring him is like tearing my flesh off. God, I'm so in love with him.

Damn idiot.

I get out and leash up Darcy before locking the car and heading toward the store. When I push open the big, heavy black door with the Dirty Pages logo on the window, I shouldn't be surprised to see that my sisters are all standing together, mirroring one another in their stances, arms over their chests and glares on their faces. Well, except for Elliot. She's holding her belly containing my nephew, the need for murder in her eyes.

I sigh heavily. "Figures you'd run and tell everyone," I say to Elliot as Darcy takes off to sniff the store. "Couldn't give me a chance to talk to you?"

Elliot narrows her eyes. "It is our job to protect you, Clara."

I look at each of my older sisters, the four who raised me, love me, and, of course, my loyalty to them runs deep. Unable to speak, I realize that while they want to protect me, I have to protect Riggs. Protect our love. I swallow hard as I nod. "And I can't begin to thank you for that."

"Is it true? Did he say it?" Louisa asks, her eyes in slits. "After everything, he said that?"

I lick my lips, fighting back the tears. "He did, but?—"

"No but," Austen snaps. "You are not nothing."

"I know," I stress, showing them my palms. "But we all know how Alex is. While he is a doll baby when it comes to our sister, he runs his mouth like no other. Riggs was trying to keep everything under wraps until after the wedding."

"Well, he failed miserably," Eliza offers, looking deeply into my eyes. "You gave this man your soul, and he betrayed you."

I exhale. "Guys, I need everyone to relax. Yes, what he said was trash and truly unfair, but he didn't mean it. He was trying to get Alex off his back, and while he chose a shitty way of doing it, his intention never was to hurt me."

"But surely you're hurt," Louisa says incredulously.

"Of course I am. It sucks to hear that, but I truly believe he didn't mean the words."

"Then why say them?" Eliza asks, searching my eyes. "We all know he's gruff and kind of standoffish. What if this is truly how he feels?"

"It's not," I insist, shaking my head. "He had every intention of coming in to talk to you guys himself, but I knew you all would chew him up."

"Fucking right," Elliot snaps. "I want to roast his ass."

I roll my eyes. "Guys, please, trust me?—"

"You're naive, Clara. You can't let him treat you like this," Louisa says.

"I think you're so in love with him that you aren't seeing how bad this looks," Eliza adds.

"We just want what is best for you, and he isn't known for being lovable or kind," Austen adds. "Even if he seems like he is with you. Maybe he's masking it?"

"He's not," I assert, shaking my head.

"You don't see what we do," Louisa says.

Anger bubbles inside me as Elliot nods. "I know you love him, sissy, but a man who speaks like that doesn't?—"

Unable to take their words any longer, I snap. "Let me stop you all right there." I press my hands to my hips and raise my chin. "I know I am the baby. I know it has been your job since I was born to protect and love me, but you have to trust me when I say Riggs didn't mean a damn word he said to Alex. That man loves me," I say, my voice breaking.

"He loves me more than I ever thought I could be loved. I walked away from him today because I knew he needed time to realize he can't speak of me like that. I watched tears gather in his eyes as he begged me not to leave. If I am so naive, so young and unable to protect myself, would I have done that?" I wait for an answer, but instead, my sisters all look away.

"I know you guys still see me as a baby. I know you want to protect me. I do. And again, I will never be able to pay you back for all the love you've provided me, but I need all of you to believe me when I say Riggs loves me. Cherishes me. Would give it all up for me."

Silence fills the space between us. The tension is so thick, I'm surprised I can even breathe. I look at each of my sisters, waiting for someone to say something as they glance at one another.

"We just want what is best for you," Louisa says softly. "We don't like hearing someone say things like that when we know how much you care for him."

"I love him," I correct, holding my eldest sister's gaze. "And I know how protective you guys are. That's why I came right here."

"To defend him, to fight his battles," Elliot accuses, and I glare at her. I have to remind myself that she's pregnant and that we're so damn close. She's my best friend, my favorite person in the world, and I know she only wants to protect me from harm.

"Wouldn't you?" I ask, holding her gaze. "If Alex made this mistake, or even Ciaran, Dimitri, or Coleson? Wouldn't you guys defend the men you love?" I'm met with silence, and I know I've gotten through to them. "No one is perfect. Hell, none of us is. And I'm not saying Riggs is, but I love him, and he makes me feel things I've never felt in my life. Please trust me. Please don't hate him. Give him some grace. He's a good man. My man."

I don't tell them what his intentions were today. I almost want to forget that fact because I don't want the moment he gives me his momma's ring to be ruined by what happened today. As much as I hate secrets between my sisters and me, I feel that sometimes they're necessary. Also, I don't want them to dump on the idea of him asking me to be his. The answer is a given for me, but my sisters need time to warm up to him.

"So, tomorrow will be awkward," Louisa says then, and I shake my head.

"I told him not to come."

Elliot's mouth goes slack, and the rest of my sisters gawk at me. "Are you serious?" Eliza asks, and I shrug.

"We don't have any intentions of making tomorrow anything but perfect. As much as we both want him to be there, I know you guys need time to process and trust him again. Hopefully this will help."

Elliot looks away, shaking her head as Austen meets my gaze. "He was okay with that?"

"Not at all. He's torn up about it, but he knows how important this day is for Lou and Ciaran."

Louisa swallows hard. "He does love you."

"He does," I say softly, and thankfully, Darcy comes back to me, going between my legs for the support I didn't realize I needed.

"I'm sorry, sis," Elliot says quietly. "Want me to kick Alex's ass?"

I scoff, shaking my head. "No. He was only looking out for me."

She nods as her eyes fill with tears. I close the distance between all of us, and, to my surprise, Darcy follows with me. Riggs is doing great with him, and that only makes me miss him more. As I wrap my arms around my sisters, they hug me just as tightly, and we all can't help but laugh when Elliot's belly gets in the way. In their arms, I feel like things may have changed. I'm no longer the baby who needs protecting. I'm a woman in love, like they are, and they know they raised me to take care of myself.

On a sigh, I say, "Now, I've got the day to myself. What are we doing?"

We decide to have a girls' night and then head to the venue early. Since I don't have an overnight bag, I head over to my apartment to pack one. Once I'm in the car on my way, I pick up my phone to see all the missed calls and texts from Riggs. My heart swells as I dial his number, and he answers immediately.

"Where are you?"

"On my way to my apartment to pack a bag, I'm meeting the girls for a girls' night."

By his sigh, I know he's not happy. "Come home."

"Maybe tomorrow," I say softly, fighting back the tears. "Aren't you wondering how it went?"

"I don't care," he says simply. "I don't care what they think of me. I only want you."

I bite my lip, my tears spilling over as my heart hammers in my chest. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Clara—"

"I love you."

"Damn it, love, you're hell on my heart."

"And you wouldn't have it any other way."

"I wouldn't," he admits, his voice low. "Would you come home if I said I'm slowly dying without you by my side?"

I smile through my tears, and I swallow. "No, but I would say I feel the same."

"Then come home."

"I will tomorrow," I say softly, wiping my cheeks free of tears. "I love you, Riggs."

His voice breaks as he says, "I love you more, love."

I don't say goodbye because it's not goodbye, and I refuse to put that finality on our phone call. Instead, I hang up, and I cry because I do miss him, I do love him, and I want more than anything to go home to him.

But I know I can't.

My sisters raised me to be a strong woman, and I need to remind Riggs of that.