Chapter 9: Scarlet

9

SCARLET

" L et's get out of the shower. Get you out of those clothes," I said once he'd stopped trembling.

"Right." We pulled apart, and he pressed his lips to my forehead before rising and helping me to my feet before shutting the water off. He didn't release my hand as he helped me out of the shower, only letting go to wrap a towel around me.

He was silent but oddly tender as he paused to stroke my cheek, those dark eyes soft as he held my gaze for a few moments.

"Thank you."

I almost didn't register the words that left his mouth, his lips pulling into the faintest smile. I nodded gently, and he sighed before he began peeling off the wet bandages on my arms. I watched silently as he pulled out a first aid kit from beneath the sink and re-wrapped my injuries.

"There, that's better," he said, offering me a faint smile before sweeping me up into his arms.

I knew there was more he was keeping from me. Things I still wanted to know. But I was exhausted, and I knew this side of him I was seeing was a damn privilege. A side I imagined very few ever saw.

So I didn't push, I just held onto him as he carried me out into my designated room, my body wrapped in a towel. He set me down on the bed shedding his wet pants before climbing onto it with me and resting his head on my chest.

I wasn't sure what I'd expected, but it certainly hadn't been this.

He wrapped his arms around me, and I stared at the inked artwork on his back and shoulders as he laid on me, the moment oddly sweet and filling me with a strange feeling.

I didn't say a word as we laid in silence like that, feeling like I'd just gained the strange trust of a wild animal. I traced my fingers over the large skull on his back, the hollowed-out eyes on each shoulder blade, surrounded by flames and darkness.

"What was her name?" he asked as he nuzzled my chest.

"Who?" I stilled my hands on his back, frowning down at his still-wet hair. He was still covered in droplets of water, but I didn't care right now.

"Your daughter."

I swallowed at the question. So Julian hadn't relayed that part then. "Lily. Her name was Lily."

"Lily. So beautiful and pure." He sighed heavily as his strong arms tightened around me, his weight a strange comfort on top of my lower section. "I'm sorry she was taken from you. We'll find him, kitten, and he will pay. I promise you that."

I let my gaze wander to the window, staring out at the cityscape in the morning sun. Would they really find that bastard? I wouldn't put it past him, but my stomach knotted at the thought .

"Did you have a name chosen for your son?"

"I wanted to call him Xavier, but we never actually spoke about it," he said before kissing my arm.

"Why Xavier?"

"It was the name of my best friend. He died five years ago in a shooting with the Russos. We both got shot, I just somehow survived."

I frowned at that. Did that have anything to do with how the Russos had said he was a dead man walking? A ghost? How he'd taken a bullet for his brothers once already.

"Did you nearly die?" I asked quietly as I continued trailing my fingers over his back, finding it oddly delightful how he relaxed, his weight sinking onto me more at my touch.

"I got shot in the head. Ended up in a coma for three months. They said it was a miracle I woke up, but I was different after that." His voice had gone low, and I moved one hand to his hair. Where had he been shot? How on earth had he survived? That was a death sentence normally.

What had happened?

He quivered at the soft touch before reaching up and grabbing my hand. I paused, allowing him to guide my hand to a scar in his hairline. The jagged, raised skin there was hidden by his hair, but I could feel it. "They said I'd never be quite right. Sometimes, I wonder if it's why I'm so…"

"Brutal?" The word slipped out before I could think too much about it. It was the best word for how he'd been towards me, and I wasn't about to pretend like he hadn't made my life hell. I wanted to call him out on his behavior, for everything he'd done to me, but right now, I could also see his walls were down.

I may be a psycho in my own way, but I wasn't going to tear someone apart just when they were letting down their shields. When he was being beyond vulnerable with me. He'd saved me, taken a bullet for me, sure, it didn't take back the things he'd done, but it was something.

"Yes." His tone sounded off, and I felt his jaw clenched despite the towel dividing us. I continued trailing my hand through his hair, running the other over his back.

"Tessa came into my life while I was in rehab, I met her in the hospital, she was the daughter of some rich prick who had put her into the hospital for mental help. I was trying to relearn how to be… human, I guess, and she didn't seem to care that I was different. That I was darker, more messed up. I guess meeting in a psych hospital isn't the way to meet, but we don't get to choose those things." He let out a sharp laugh before sighing. "My brothers, they did their best to try not to treat me differently, but I could see it was hard for them. My brain didn't work the same anymore, I can't… I'm not good with the more business side of things. I get bored, have bad thoughts," he admitted quietly, and I stared down at him. I would never have in a million years imagined him opening up to me like this, but I found it oddly sweet. It wasn't an excuse, just an explanation.

"And she accepted you as you were?"

"Yes. I know our relationship was toxic, but being loved despite being so messed up, it was nice. The suicidal threats to control me, I know that was wrong, I know that. But when it was good, it was great, she was fine with rough stuff and experimenting. It helped me."

I traced the edge of the skull on his back, noting the scars hidden beneath the ink. Some looked new, and the patch-up from his recent gunshot wounds and grazes were damp. They'd need to be replaced, but right now, I wanted to leave him be. I felt like I was sitting with a wounded wolf, and it was allowing me to be there, accepting my company despite its instincts.

Tessa was clearly crazy in her own way, but they sounded like a weird-ass match. Too bad shit had gone south in the worst ways. As much of a prick as he was, he didn't deserve it. No one did.

"You had a few things on you in the police files. Restraining orders, small offenses. You've not had luck with past partners, have you?" he said after a few moments of silence.

"You know my history, Cristian. Drug addicted parents, mum was more an alcoholic than anything, but my father was an addict. Sold me for drug money. How was I supposed to know what a functional relationship was meant to look like?" I snorted. "I've been with abusers, cheaters, users, you name it. Not long before Tommy I tried some therapy, wanted to try to break the pattern. Then I met him, things went great, or so I thought. Turns out he was the same as all the others, only in it for himself."

I'd had a slew of relationships since my teen years, Tommy having been the longest. None had been healthy, even Tommy's, despite how I'd thought it was great at the time. There had been signs, but I'd ignored them. Rose-tinted glasses and all that shit.

"Maybe it's time you get into one for yourself. Where you hold all the power."

"Oh yeah? You going to play matchmaker with me after this month is up?" I scoffed.

He stiffened on me before sitting upright and straddling me, those eyes dark and flashing with something that made my stomach lurch.

"No, kitten, from the moment you stabbed me, you changed everything. I'm fucked up, I know that, I don't deny it. And I've decided you're going to be mine, Scarlet. You're crazy in your own way, fiery, full of life, a true fighter. I admire it, and I want to see you burn bright." He dipped his head down low, one hand cupping my cheek as his mouth pulled into a twisted smile. "I also want to be the only one who ever breaks you, who has you on your knees and begging."

"Here I was thinking we were having a moment," I breathed, entranced by the look in his eye. There was something glimmering in those dark depths, something haunting, beautiful, and made a fire ignite in me like nothing else.

It was wrong, and yet it thrilled me right now despite everything.

"Oh, we are, kitten," he ducked down further, pressing a soft kiss to my lips before pulling back, "because you've hooked your claws into my heart now, kitten."

I stared at him, my heart pounding at his words as he stared at me like I was the grandest jewel on the planet.

It was overwhelming, and all I could do was swallow as he held my face, those eyes burning into me and making me tingle.

"Cristian—"

I flinched as the door shot open, and Cristian's gaze flicked to our intruder.

I followed his gaze, locking eyes with Tyrone as he arched a brow at us both.

So much for having a moment.

Although, whatever the hell this was, it was doing things to me that it had no right doing.

Feeling things I shouldn't have been feeling. At all.