Chapter 19

Nineteen

Jess was ready to get out of the hospital. It’d been three days since her attack, and her parents and Finn’s were hovering.

Neither of them had questioned why Finn was always by her side. They’d just seemed to accept it, as if it were normal.

If Finn had been acting like a friend, Jess would’ve understood their reaction, but he was acting like an attentive boyfriend. Knowing what she wanted before she did. Making sure she was comfortable. Feeding her chocolate habit by always getting her a chocolate bar from the vending machine after lunch each day.

Well, those were all things a friend would do, too, but a friend wouldn’t kiss her every time they walked out of the room. Or hold her hand as if she was the most precious thing in the world.

Many times, her mom had looked at her with questions in her eyes, but those questions remained unasked.

The police had come and taken her statement; fortunately, her parents hadn’t been in the room at the time, so they hadn’t heard her repeat yet again what she’d gone through in New York.

So far, the detectives hadn’t come back with any leads, but Finn assured Jess that Tex was on the job and was determined to find out who’d stabbed her.

She reached for her Kindle. Kaley had brought it to Jess on one of her visits, and she was excited to read the latest book from one of her favorite authors, Susan Stoker.

The fact Ms. Stoker wrote about military men was a bonus. Prior to reconnecting with Finn, there’d been times she’d imagined she was the heroine in danger and Finn was the hero who rescued her.

Once again, life was imitating art, and Jess didn’t like experiencing it as much as reading about it. Even after what she’d been through with Bartholomew, it hadn’t put her off reading her favorite author’s books.

One day her hero would come in and save her, like in the books. Maybe her hero already had—and that was Finn. He was exactly like those heroes. All protective and caring.

Over her short stay in the hospital, her feelings for him had deepened. He might not have said the words, and neither had she, but he’d shown he loved her in so many ways.

Telling Finn that she was in love with him wasn’t something Jess wanted to do in a hospital bed. She wanted the moment to be perfect. Maybe when she got discharged, she’d pester him to take her to the beach and then she could express how she felt with the ocean and the setting sun as the perfect backdrop.

“Hey, sweetie. How are you?” Her mom’s head popped around the door.

Jess pushed away the dream of her and Finn declaring their love for each other.

“Hey, Mom. Where’s Dad?” she asked when her mom sat on the plastic chair near the bed.

“Oh, he’s taken Sawyer and Paula to the beach. They were getting bored and seeing as the beaches are so much nicer here, he took them there for the day.”

“You didn’t want to go with them?”

Her mom shook her head, her eyes darting to Jess’s arm.

Her scarred arm.

Jess had been surprised that not one of them—her parents or Finn’s—had asked about the scar. Once the brain fog from her surgery had disappeared, she’d not bothered to try to hide it. It had been on display while she’d been knocked out, so they had to have seen it.

Had they asked Finn about it? Had he told them?

Not possible. Not with the way Mom’s finger was now hovering over the top of the raised red line.

“May I?” she asked.

No!

She simply nodded, but turned her face away so she wouldn’t see her mom’s finger on the horror that Bartholomew had inflicted on her. Her mom’s featherlight touch was soothing and comforting.

“What happened, sweetie?”

Jess met her mom’s gaze. Shining in their depths, there was understanding, as if her mom already knew the whole story.

Had she gotten it wrong? Had Finn told them?

Again, Jess doubted he had, because there was no way her dad wouldn’t have barged into her room demanding answers. Unless he’d been wanting to do that, and Mom had convinced him to let her ask the questions.

Maybe her dad’s beach trip with her siblings was simply a ruse.

Jess’s head began to pound at all the possibilities, and all she wanted was for Finn to walk into the room so she didn’t have to face telling her mom how na?ve she’d been. How she’d been flattered at the attention, because her heart had been bruised by Finn.

No, it wasn’t her SEAL’s fault she’d gotten involved with Bartholomew. She’d made the decision to date him. She’d liked him. Had thought him attractive.

“I don’t know if I want to tell you,” Jess said eventually.

Her mom studied her, her finger still stroking the scar. “You’re an adult and it’s your choice not to tell me. Or your father. You must know that whatever caused this, we won’t judge you. If this happened because you felt like you couldn’t talk to us about what was going through your mind, then I’m sorry we didn’t give you the safe space you needed.”

It took a second for Jess to process what her mom was saying. Her attention darted to the scar. The location. The direction of it. And it hit her what her mom, and possibly her dad, had thought when they’d seen the scar. “Oh, Mom! No! It’s not that. Not what you’re thinking. I didn’t do it to myself. Someone did it to me.” Guilt slammed into Jess that her parents hadn’t asked her about her scar because they’d thought she’d tried to end her life. That they hadn’t shown her that she could come to them with her problems and felt like they’d let her down.

How could she have been so stupid as to believe if she’d told them what was going on with Bartholomew, they’d think she had failed them?

Sure, they would’ve been worried and would’ve wanted her to come home, but deep down, Jess’s assumption that they’d forbid her from going back to New York wasn’t true. Her parents wouldn’t stop her from continuing her career. Her parents weren’t like that. They were loving and caring.

“I’m sorry, Mom. I’m so sorry if you and Dad have been thinking that for the last few days.” Tears plopped down on her sheet, the moisture spreading out like a ripple in a lake.

“Jess, sweetie, it’s okay.” Her mom enveloped her in a hug, and she clung to the woman who’d been her rock since she’d been eight years old. Who’d almost sacrificed her life when they’d been kidnapped by her mom’s former boyfriend’s brother.

Nothing ever felt as good as being hugged by her mom, except maybe being hugged by Finn.

Once Jess had composed herself and was sure she could get through the story without breaking down, she took a deep breath. “His name was Bartholomew, and he loved the way I danced. He came to every show we did in New York and when we came back during a break in our tour, we went on a few dates. I liked him, and we had a good time together. But then he changed, got very controlling and demanding. When I broke things off, he stalked me. It got to the point where he was sending horrible things to my apartment. He would be backstage after shows, and I had to wait for hours before he would leave.”

“Jess, why didn’t you say something to us? We could’ve got one of your dad’s friends to give us advice. Or we could’ve got Beth to dig into his background. We would’ve been there for you.”

Jess had forgotten her dad’s computer genius friend, Beth. She’d heard the stories of how Beth had been instrumental in finding her dad’s friends’ wives when they’d gone missing. “I don’t know. I was worried Dad would demand I return home. You know he wasn’t happy with me going to Julliard, and even less because I stayed in New York when I’d graduated.”

Mom chuckled. “You know your dad is all bluster. He wouldn’t have stopped you from pursuing your dreams. He just doesn’t like his children straying far from the fold. But he is also so very proud of you. Proud of your independence. He would’ve been scared, but he wouldn’t have tried to make you come home.”

Intellectually, she’d known that. But emotionally, it wouldn’t have taken much for her to have been convinced to return home. Going back to her parents’ place would represent safety and security. By staying in New York, she’d proven to herself she didn’t need the safety net her parents’ love and home provided.

Jess sighed. “I guess deep down I knew that, but…”

“But you needed to deal with it yourself. Needed to take back control of your life that this Bartholomew person was taking from you.”

“Yes. This.”

Her mom had hit the nail on the head. Had been able to articulate what she hadn’t been able to put into words or thoughts.

“I take it, he decided, because he couldn’t have you, no one else could.” Her mom’s voice was shaky.

Jess touched her scar, now not a symbol of weakness, but a symbol of strength. “He cornered me and slashed the knife down my arm. I can still feel the warmth of my blood spurting out, coating my arm. I don’t know how I did it, but I managed to get away and get out onto the street. I collapsed on the ground, but there were two police officers who helped me. He’s in jail now and, from what Finn’s found out, he hasn’t had anything to do with what’s been happening to me.”

Mom’s eyes went wide. “What do you mean ‘what’s been happening to you’? Has there been something more than this stabbing? Are you saying it wasn’t random but a deliberate attack?” Her mom’s voice got higher and higher until she was practically yelling.

“Yes, there’s been something else.” She relayed what’d had been done to her hotel room. “Finn has a friend who is looking into it, because he didn’t think the police would take it seriously. They might now, considering I’m here.”

“This is a lot to take in.” Her mom leaned back in her chair, a stunned look stamped on her face.

Perhaps it would’ve been better to not lay everything on her all at once, but Jess couldn’t take the words back. “I know. I’m sorry I just landed it all on you,” she whispered.

“It’s fine. I asked.” Her mom took hold of her hand. “You know, we’ll need to tell your dad about this. This isn’t something I can keep from him.”

Jess sighed again, wishing things could be different. That her mom and dad didn’t have the type of relationship they had, where there were no secrets between them. How selfish was that?

There were plenty of people whose parents had no relationship at all. She should be glad that her parents had such a strong one.

“I know. It’s just… I know he’s going to be mad at me for not saying something,” she admitted.

“I’m not going to lie. He will be mad, and he’ll feel disappointed you felt you couldn’t come to us. But it will pass because he loves you and can see that you are okay.”

“I hope so.”

“I know your father. Trust me, he will.” Mom grinned cheekily at her. “Now, what’s going on with you and Finn?”

Now Jess wished she didn’t have such a good relationship with her mom.

In the past, Jess hadn’t talked much about her boyfriends. And, considering she’d done most of her dating in New York, her parents hadn’t met the guys she’d dated.

She hadn’t taken any home. None of the relationships had been serious enough for that step. Which didn’t say a lot about her choice in men, but she wasn’t going to dwell on that.

Also, she couldn’t lie and tell her mom that nothing was happening when it was clear to everyone whenever Finn was in her room that things had changed between the two of them.

“We’re together,” Jess said simply. It was the truth, and she could feel the smile tug at the corners of her mouth as she said the words.

“I can see that. When did it happen?”

As much as she loved her mom, she wasn’t going to get into the specifics. And she most especially wasn’t going to tell her about the kiss they’d shared in New York years ago or the way Finn had ghosted her after it.

“He came and saw me perform here. He was with one of his teammates, Oak, and Oak’s girlfriend. Although they broke up that night, and now, he and Kaley seem to be together. But that’s another story.”

“Whoa, that’s a lot to digest. Did you know he was coming to your performance?” Mom seemed riveted, hanging on her every word.

“No, and to be honest, I don’t think he knew that I was going to be dancing. It was a happy coincidence. We haven’t been apart since that night.” Her cheeks flamed at the implication of her words. She’d basically announced to her mom that she and Finn were sleeping together.

While she and her mom were close, Jess never talked about her sex life with her. There had to be some boundaries in their mother-daughter relationship.

“What’s going to happen when his leave finishes?”

Trust Mom to get straight to the point. Prior to her stabbing, they’d had a plan. Well, not a plan, as such, but an idea of what they were going to do. Now, though, everything was up in the air, and she and Finn hadn’t had a chance to talk, just the two of them, to work out what they were going to do. “I’m not sure.”

Mom patted her hand. “Well, whatever it is, I hope you’ll think about coming home to us for a little while. I know that your recovery is going to take time.”

“I know.” So far there hadn’t been any response to the email she’d sent Madame Baxter about her stabbing and the time she was going to be away from the dance company.

Jess wouldn’t be surprised if she received an email soon advising her that due to the circumstances, they were rescinding their offer and were letting her go so that another dancer could fill her spot.

Would they offer to give the principal dancer’s position back to Benita, or would they promote someone new?

How, in a matter of seconds, had her life turned upside down?

And why?

Who was doing this to her?

The questions turned over in her mind, but the answers were as far away from her as the day she was stabbed.